that's it that's my last get i no longer care about anything

villain deku ideas??
  • he’s born with a quirk thats similiar to All for One in that he can use other people’s quirks?
  • ok lemme elaboraatee on that
  • so i was thinking he was boring with like a dot on his stomach, its small, about the size of a pencil eraser and white?? everyone is like ‘well its a Quirk but we’re not sure what?? it does??’ so his parents take him home and wait
  • when hes about one he’s running around shirtless with his dad when he suddenly starts breathing fire!! at first his parents are like ecstatic because he’s inherited his dad’s quirk!!! but then they notice the dot has turned black and its growing
  • it covers his whole torso before izuku lets out a cough and suddenly he can’t breath fire anymore 
  • the dot is small and white again
  • so they find out he can ‘borrow’ people’s Quirks by sort of breathing in and swallowing near them! it only lasts a certain amount of time though and once the dot on his belly covers his torso he loses it

more under cut because this got super long….

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anonymous asked:

could u write a scenario of lance finding his s/o that he left behind on earth in a galra prison ship and just like, him comforting them and their first night safe in the castle with him?

My son deserves happiness and not the angst I put him through to get there

Lance had thought that leaving behind everything on Earth had been one of the hardest things he had ever done. It was nothing compared to finding a piece of his life turn back up on a Galra prison ship. When he had laid his eyes on s/o he suddenly felt like a broken mirror, shattered on impact and unfocused. Out of all the impossible things he dealt with on a daily basis this was the thing that he just couldn’t accept as real, it had to be some kind of mind trick just to throw him off. But then he heard his name leave their lips and their eyes look at him wide and hopeful. It was then that he knew that this wasn’t a trick, this was terrible and real. It blinded him with rage and he couldn’t remember much after that, not that it mattered because the only thing he cared about was the end result. And he got exactly what he wanted … kind of.

They were back safely in the castle which should have been more than enough to make him happy. After all how often had he daydreamed about being the hero for s/o? To sweep them up in his arms and have them fawning over just how strong and powerful he was? Too often to count and yet he was feeling more nervous than the day he had asked them out, which was saying a lot since that day involved a lot of puking and several shirts ruined by sweat. It was just that he was realizing that being a hero wasn’t about saving damsels in distress, it was about dealing with the after math of bad people doing horrible things.

And at that moment he wasn’t feeling like much of a hero as he sat cradling s/o in his arms while they continued to cry into their third consecutive hour. Lance knew that he should be trying to do more but he felt as if he was recovering from shock himself. “Sweetheart … angel … please tell me what I can do. I am completely at a loss here and I can’t stand seeing you like this,” he muttered into their hair, kissing the crown of their head while pulling them even closer to his chest. He breathed in their scent, memories of laughter and sunshine breaking through the cold still air.

“I wish this was as simple as failing a test. Remember what I did then?” he asked with a small smile and a deep chuckle building in his chest “I tried to have Hunk show me how to bake brownies. Mine of course came out terrible so I tried to steal his to act as if they were my own. Too bad I ended up eating all of them before seeing you the next day. I still think that those crumbs were equally as delicious and were more than appropriate in cheering someone up,” he added feeling the ghost of a smile pulling at the corner of his lips.

 His smile grew when he heard the crying turn into sniffles and a small hiccup of a laugh. “I’m just glad that he had the sense to make a second batch knowing exactly what would happen,” they said, their voice hoarse and rough but it was music to his ears. They hadn’t said a word since coming back to the castle and this was more than a step in the right direction. “Though if I remember right … you made me fail that test because you had me so distracted I didn’t finish on time. You kept blowing me kisses and holding up cheesy pickup lines you wrote on scratch paper,” they continued, shifting to that they were now looking up at him with tears still on their eyelashes but sounding much clearer.

It was so small and yet he felt his heart melting, the familiar family of butterflies taking up their residence in his stomach. Even a million light years from Earth and he found himself completely enamored by s/o. “I refuse to acknowledge any wrong doing and stick with my defense that you were the one distracting me with that cute face of yours. I can take this to court if thats what you want, although maybe the jury would also be swayed by the hotness radiating off of you,” he teased, his fingers running down their sides in a soft tickle. It achieved just what he was looking for, a laugh.

They laughed and scurried to push his hands away. “Thats my (girl/boy/personal preference),” he sighed happily, feeling all the muscles he hadn’t even realized were tight relax all at once. “Hey I got an idea why don’t we try and get rid of those puffy circles under your eyes? I got some great face masks from the space mall, not that I am sure we are ever welcome back to get more, and while we let our faces get all cleaned and junk I can braid your hair. Cause wow its gotten so much longer since I saw you last and I am loving it. Keith is going to be so jealous~” he sang giving a small shimmy in what was suppose to be an attempt at dancing. 

 “You know that actually sounds really nice,” they said reaching a hand up to stroke his cheek. Lance eagerly leaned into the caress, kissing the tips of their fingers. “It will be just like when we were at the garrison. I missed those spa nights Lance … I missed you.” They finally met his eyes making him realize that they had been avoiding doing that all night. He felt himself holding his breath as he stared down at them, counting their freckles and the different shades of (eye color) speckled in their eyes. He had missed this too, more than anything.

“Things are going to be okay now s/o. I know that because of me that you went through a hell of a lot but I’m here now. I’m going to make things right. I’ll make things normal again,” Lance whispered, breathing the promises against their lips that were suddenly so close to his. There were tears in their eyes again but they where laughing, smiling against him. Maybe they were the good kind of tears like the ones he was blinking back.

“I don’t want normal Lance. I want you,” they finally said before at last crossing the bridge between their mouths and kissing him. It was wet and salty, short and rough with their chapped lips against his own soft ones. “After all your my hero,” they said with a tinkering laugh, holding his face in their hands “and despite everything I think … I think this is where I belong.”

Lance smiled back, a steady stream of tears of his own staining his cheeks. “You’re absolutely right, there is no where you belong more than here with me.” 

Your A Girl?

MOVIE : MAZE RUNNER 
COUPLE : NEWT X READER
RATING : SMUTTY

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So...another post....because....i feel it needs to be said just one more time....with more understanding.

*sighs deeply* why do people assume because i write x reader fics i don’t care about lin? Or any one i would write about, be it rami malek, or dan and phil when i was younger, or norman reedus when i was a big ol whore for the walking dead.

Look, i have made many an angry post, many a post trying to defend what we write about.

Here is the thing. In any fandom, for any human, fictional character, inanimate object anything! There are fans who will be crazy obsessed, hell in the kpop world, fans have sent bloody letters and shit. Those are obsessive people. That being said, that is out of line, that is crazy, and should not be tolerated. Breaking personal boundaries or stalking is not ever okay.

If i wouldn’t like it to happen to me, i wouldn’t do that to another human being.

Us who write x readers, well known blogs, we respect lin and his family, we have set tags for our own needs. So others don’t see our i guess internal fantasies.

Now, because i write fics about real people, it in no way, means i am
A) going to send it to that person
B) stalk said person
C) call them daddy in real life.
People who do that in periscopes or instalive or what have you, are either being funny, to themselves​ or friends they are with, or have mind vomit and that happens. To everyone, word and brain vomit just happen.

We write because its nice to place ourselves into a fake world, note i said Fake, not real, not ever going to be real, world. I do not ever think anything i am saying, or writing, is real, so if i have a head cannon of lin thats
- lin is the type to let you sit in his lap even when you complain that you are too heavy.
Thats just me observing him in interviews or listening to him on a podcast and making an idea of maybe he would be like that.

Head cannons and fics are based on our own ideas of what we think lin or any one we wrote about would be like. They could be true or so far from the truth its insane. But we will never know because we do bot no lin in real life, and never will, just the fact of life. So we all have to make our own, guesses of how we think said person would be like.

If Lin was still on tumblr, which he isn’t, not because shipping, or x reader fanfics. But because people in a whole different section of the fandom, were asking for the bootleg link to hamilton that someone who went, filmed against lins wishes, and people were making gifs and asking for the link, it made him very upset, because like he has said
The video of the OBC is coming, we just have to wait for it. Simple. That is why he is no longer on tumblr. And he’s a goddamn 37 year old man with a family and a 2 and a half year old, an actor filming a movie and so much more, he has twitter and that’s all he has got time for. Meanwhile daveed is so privet with his life he has twitter and insta…and he barley uses those. He is just very focused on clipping and his projects. So yes we write about them.

But we respect them, we keep to our side of the web, and we act respectful to lin by not sharing our stories and ship things with him, we retweet his tweets or make mood boards or other non shippy or x reader things and show those to him. Because he is not a fictional character to us. He is a role model, an idol, a hero, a human with a heart bigger then this world can hold. He is a loving father, husband, and son. He is an award winning genius. Who i have looked up to since i discovered hamilton.

You wanna know why?
Because as the only half POC in my entire family, i saw hispanic/latinx representation on broadway, in a place i loved, i saw a passionate latino man unafraid of who he is. I saw a real human, not a talking dog, or the things people say we are on the news. I saw myself, because since i was young me being half mexican was the joke in my family
“Haha did you run jump or swim here?”
“Shit cheynne get down the police are coming”
“So i guess we have to change your last name, don’t want the patrol to chuck you across the wall”
Me being half mexican, was a joke, and i never realized until i was old enough and i saw how fucked up it was.

Lin made me so proud to see a latino man, a latino in general be praised for breaking the wall, and most of the time no one commented on his race, why? Because it didn’t matter. He wrote a beautiful story, he told a forgotten persons life, he made me cry, and laugh.

Lin will always be my idol, my true role model on how to live, on how to treat people, to show that kindness is the key, to not fight back with harsh words, i have done that i know, i have been rude and snarky, yes. And that was not okay. I am sorry.

To me, i am able and have been for years, i have been able to separate the fantasy lin, in my mind, the ‘Daddy AF, plow me, etc.’ Lin, from the very real in my heart idol and role model, father type figure lin. I can have my own world and write it out for fun, for my own sort of writing things, but always knowing, always, ALWAYS, knowing he is a real human, with emotions and feelings and a family.

But people who call us creepy and gross and weird and obsessive and fucking disgusting. You don’t seem to see we are also humans, real people, with feelings and emotions and take what you say to heart.

A person wrote to me after i made a post and said, because of what people said in such a post as this, that they felt so guilty and had a full blown panic attack, and were going to delete all of there social media because of that. How is that okay, how is that fair, we respect everyone we write about, but people can’t understand words they say or type can be just as hurtful as ours are to you.

Now, we stay away from the main tags, or try to, its tumblr its gonna happen, we write we tag, if it gets a lot of notes, that is not in our control, block us so you don’t see our fics…or scroll past it or select photo or gif. It is so much easier to scroll past us, then to be hateful or hurtful.

As aaron burr once said in a marvelous musical.
“Talk less. Smile more”
In this i mean, scroll past, smile more.

Cause guys
“Love is love is love is love” kindness is what the world needs, lin said it himself.

Remember, write what you want. Sing what you want. Dance how you want. Because we only have a grain of sands worth of time to do what we love, so don’t waste it.

“We only have a grain of sands worth of time on this earth….”

@can-it-be-english Yo could you write an imagine where a student (female if thats okay) starts crying becasue the book being read is sad and the male TC like tries to confort her in class and lets her go like get a drink of water. And once everyone leaves after class he hugs he and fluff then maybe smut if thats okay? THANK YOU!


The Great Gatsby, that was the book your class had decided to read. The tragic romantic tale of Jay Gatsby and Daisy Buchanan.

Your English literature teacher had assigned the book to your class a few weeks ago and was letting everyone finish the last few chapters during the period.

Your eyes ran across the pages quickly as you read the line,  I have an idea that Gatsby himself didn’t believe it would come, and perhaps he no longer cared. If that was true he must have felt that he had lost the old warm world, paid a high price for living too long with a single dream.

Your eyebrows knit in confusion. No no no no, you thought to yourself rereading the text a few more times. Gatsby can’t be dead. He didn’t even get to talk to Daisy! Your eyes started to water and you gripped the book tightly in your hand. Never in your life had you read a book that resonated with you quite like F. Scott  Fitzgerald’s classic. Everything about the book reminded you of yourself and your teacher crush, your English literature teacher. Like Gatsby for Daisy, you would do anything just for your teacher crush.

“Miss, are you alright?” Your teacher asked quietly in front of the class.

You looked up from the book, suddenly realizing that tears were falling from your eyes. “Ye-yeah.” You sniffed. 

“Are you sure?” He raised an eyebrow.

“Can I get some water?” You wiped your eyes setting down the book.

“Of course!” He nodded and you stood up quickly leaving the room, walking into the bathroom where you started to breakdown.

You hated yourself for crying so much over a book! A book, a fictional book! You thought. You stayed in the bathroom until the bell ringed for next period.

When you got back in your English class, your teacher stood in the front erasing things from the whiteboard, he stopped when he saw you.

“Sit down at my desk, darling.”

Darling. You wanted to melt. “Y-yes sir.”

After he finished cleaning up the whiteboard, he sat across from you at his desk. “That was a pretty heartbreaking novel, wasn’t it?”

You nodded and bit your lip. “Yeah, I feel so stupid for crying though. It’s just a novel. Something defiantly struck a cord with me thou-” Your voice started to break and you looked down. Tears started to form again.

“Hey, it’s okay,” He said gently standing up.

You shook your head and covered your face with your hands. “It was so sad.” You said between sobs.

He walked over to you. “Stand up,” He ordered.

You obeyed and stood up, not sure what he was going to do.

You must have blinked or something because the next thing you knew, his muscular arms were around your body. His hands rubbing your back up in down in a soothing moment.

“It’s okay,” He cooed. “It’s okay.”

You buried your head in his shoulder while crying and he continued to run his hands up and down your back. After all your tears had left your eyes you looked into his hazel eyes. “Thank you,” you whispered.

“Anytime,” He smiled and then cupped your cheeks with his hands. His lips crashing down on yours.

Your breath caught short and you closed your eyes, kissing him back.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “We really shouldn’t be doing this.”

“I know, but I still want it.” You murmured.

He pressed you up against the back wall and ran his hands up your thigh. “Will you be my Daisy?”

“Of course,” You smirked, “Mr. Gatsby.”

He kissed you passionately, like you two were the last two on earth. All your sadness disappeared and you felt like the luckiest girl.

Prompt Set#2 for 8000 Followers!

1.)  “Dude, a moving car ran into me last night and it didn’t hurt.”

2.)“This feels almost natural.  I wonder what would happen if I got knocked out though.“

“No, don’t even think about it.”

3.)“Everyone needs to calm down.  Just calm down now.”

4.) The men all stopped and stared at me. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t a little freaked out.

5.) I closed my eyes and thought to myself, Everyone be calm. Just be calm.


6.)  She backed when I asked, and I felt movement at my stomach. The bullet she had previously shot me with worked itself out as we watched.

8.) These were my friends; I had to be honest with them.

9.) “I wish you would stop playing with your third eye like that. It’s really disturbing. ”

“Don’t worry you get used to it.”

10.) “You’re cute when you’re lying.”

11.) “Don’t tell her. She already thinks I’m crazy.”

“Uh, everyone except for me thinks you’re crazy.”

12.) “I guess it’s too late for me to ask you for your number.”

13.) “That’s it?  That’s what you are so freaked out about?”

14.)“Stop joking about this for a minute. My sister would kill us if she found out what we’ve just done. Put it back and let’s go home.”

15.) The day was brighter than I’d like, my slit eyes worked better in the shadows of alleys at night.

16.) Thank god. I don’t know how much longer I can last out here. If you hadn’t come along…”

17.) “I had hoped you’d believe me when I said that I had nothing to do with this.”

18.) “Where are you going?”

“I need to take him someplace without oxygen.”

19.) “Promise you’ll come back?”

“You know the rule. No promises. ”

20.) “She was the biggest mistake of my life.”

21.) “I’m in charge.”

22.) “I just…need some air.”

23.) “Im not going yo blow up his head, though it is a tempting offer.”

24.) “You seem to think you have a chance. That some one will save you. That maybe I’ll change my mind.”

25.) “We all get what’s owed to us in the end. So no, I’m not afraid. Just disappointed. ”

26.)This is more like magic than science.

That was the first thing, I said, when I was new too.

27.) “That is exactly what Satan wants you to try,” she reminded him.

28.) “ Perhaps we should be more careful of what we say. this is, after all, his domain.“

29.) “It is always better to hope than to have no hope at all.”

“ So you had been listening to dad’s lessons.”

30.)  “Are you sure you don’t desire me?”

I haven’t been sure of anything for a long time.

31.) “ I have to admit, I didn’t think you’d have the guts to really do it.”

32.) I thought I would never get used to this. Looks like I did.

33.) “I didn’t even do anything yet.”

34.) “Man, God must really hate you.”

“I am God!”

35.) “Oh, don’t mind her. She’s just mad that she sucks at Mario Kart.”

36.) “Shush. Did you just hear that?”

“Yeah, it’s called an echo dumbass.”

37.)“He’s a lot older than you think.”

38.) “I still can’t wrap my head around the part where you-”

39.) “Finally. Some alone time.”

“Technically you’re not alone.”

“Holy Fuck!”

40.) “When the smartest person in the galaxy says that he can’t understand you, I think should feel a bit concerned.”

41.) “I just wanted a family…something to call my own.”

“Yeah, well. I told you so.”

42.)  “A penny for your thoughts?”

“We both know you don’t have a penny.”

43.) “Wanna have sex?”

“With you? No thanks.”

44.) “I don’t have a favorite. Actually you’d be doing me a favor if you just space’d them all.”

“She’s totally joking!”

45.) “Stop! Just stop talking! All of you shut up!”

46.) “Good luck.”

“Thats all you have to say?”

47.) “You sold me out.”

48.) “Shitshitshit!”

“That doesn’t sound too good.

Thats because it isn’t. I dropped ___”

49.)  "I don’t see how your thoughts could be worse than the rest of ___”

50.) "Odd that such a thing should exist here.”

“And where is here exactly?”

“Good question. ”

i received a question that i’m going to answer publicly because i have no doubt that i will be asked this in the nearish future *hint hint*

question:

Good Morning Courtney. I want free form locs and a while ago I was online looking up info about free form locs. This is the 4th or 5th time doing a big chop and now I want to grow my hair into locs. Is there anything I should be weary about? I looked up how often to wash, how to take care of it, what products to use, and what not. But I don’t have money to buy natural shampoo. Is using synthetic shampoo bad for locs?? Your locs were so pretty why did you cut them off??

answer:

this is a photo of my last set of locs just before i cut them. they were seven months old

i feel like i should start off by saying that they were not free formed. while i didn’t twist or retwist, i did section them and keep them that way by pulling them apart when the roots began to tangle with a neighboring loc. people often confuse thick locs with free formed locs. if mine were free formed i would’ve let my hair section itself naturally

i can only give you tips on how to achieve locs like mine

general tips:

  • less is more. don’t wash too much, don’t retwist too often (if at all), and don’t use a slew of products. if you’re curious, i used Dr. Bronner’s Soap for my hair and castor oil for my scalp.
  • they say not to wet your hair much or at all when you first start but thats bullshit. water activates curls and thats what you want. the curlier your strands get, the more easily they with tangle with one another. locs are tangled hair. i wet my locs with water like every other day right from the start
  • remember: the fewer locs you have or in other words, the fewer sections you create, the thicker an individual loc will be. i makes sense because each loc will have more strands of hair tangled into it. i had 46
  • consider the density of your hair before sectioning. density refers to how closely those strands are packed together on your head. your hair’s density can also be affected by your hair texture, porosity and width. everyones different. the higher the density, the thicker your locs will look overall
  • keep in mind that hair density not only varies from person to person but also, on your own head from section to section. for example, on the temples on my head, my hair strands grow farther apart from one another so as a result, its not as thick. if i wanted all my locs to be as uniform as possible, i would make the sections on my temples a little larger to compensate for the difference in thickness compared to the rest of my hair
  • in order to achieve the thickest locs possible, keep retwisting at a minimum. twisting the hair causes the hair in each loc to pack together more tightly and in turn appear thinner.  i didn’t twist at all and as result, i maintained thick fluffy locs. granted, they were young but as they matured they would’ve remained somewhat thicker than the average person which a similar hair density as mine who chooses to twist often

about washing:

  • i didn’t use shampoos because many have sulfates and parbens and extra shit that my skin and hair doesn’t need. it coats the hair with things that make it seem healthy but in the end causes buildup which can lead to damage if not quickly taken care of. not to mention the moisturizing and conditioning agents in regular shampoos that aren’t super great for locs. mine anyway
  • i used Dr. Bronners Soap in lavender but peppermint is cheaper. I invested in a 32 oz bottle of the stuff and it lasted me six or more months because i always heavily diluted it everytime i used it. you can even purchase a gallon and have that last even longer. i don’t know what your financial situation is like, but think of it as an investment. buy it once and make it last for as long as possible
  • dilution is great because you can make whichever soap you decide to use last longer and also the more you dilute it with water, the easier it is to wash out. easy in, easy out. you don’t want soap getting trapped in your locs. it can cause buildup
  • keep in mind that i had short locs, so i didn’t need to use much soap and that i wasn’t playing sports and/or sweating in a gym everyday so washing often wasn’t necessary. i also didn’t have any scalp conditions to care for

why i cut my locs:

  • because i no longer wanted them. thank you for the compliment

take these tips and adjust as needed to make them work for you. you’ll figure it out in time. good luck! :) xx

I Need You

i wanted to be the one that was there for you forever. i wanted to be yours until the day i died. i wanted to have you for the rest of my life. i would still do anything for you, through all of the pain and all of the bullshit, i would still go to the ends of the earth for you, and thats so fucking scary to me. even after youve hurt me, ripped out my heart, stomped on it, and told everybody i was the worst person youve ever met, i would still go out of my way just to see you smile at me. just to look down at those beautiful brown eyes and see your smile. see my world. i had plans for you, i had plans for us. i knew what i wanted to do with my life. i knew what i wanted to do after high school, where i wanted to go to college, who i wanted to do it all with, and where i wanted to move and who i wanted to do it all with. i wanted to move on that fucking island with you. jesus i was so fucking in love with you that i have no motivation to even wake up and go to school because i know ill see your face and ill feel my stomach drop and have the need to just fall to my knees and weep. id still do anything for you. im sitting in my house, in my room, doing nothing all fucking day. i dont even want to move, i dont want to get out. i just want to die. i feel like without you, i no longer have any purpose in this world. and that hurts so fucking bad. id do anything for you baby..id do anything. id take my own life just to see you smile one last time, and thats the scariest thing to me. im so in love with you, even after you hate me, that i would do anything, and jesus i mean anything just to make you happy. i cant stop crying. i cant even get out of my fucking bed. i feel dead. i feel so fucking lost without you. ive never been so sad in my entire life. its as if my will to do anything left when you did, and with that, goes my universe. im crushed, im so fucking crushed. its as if ive hit an all time low, rock bottom, and ill always carry these weights with me my entire life. these chains that im tied to you. and as i sit at home, in my room sobbing over you, i know youre out there happy. youre getting out, youre talking to other people, you actually have the will, have hope to do anything. ive lost all fucking energy to do anything. i just sit in my room sobbing over you. ive been crying day in and day out for three weeks. sitting in my bed sobbing. its gotten so bad that  my fathers even come back into my life because hes worried. and when a man who hasnt been in your life for 17 years comes into your life because hes worried about you, you know youre fucked. im fucked. im so in love with you that without you i have no more faith. in myself, or in anybody. ill never get over you. and tomorrow night, ill be laying in my bed sobbing even more, because ill know youre out at prom, having fun, while all i can do is cry over you. i have no more hope. ive lost everything. ive lost everything.. ive put everything into you, and now that youre gone, im gone. i cant do this anymore. its too much to see you everyday and want to just sob over you. i hate myself for this. all i need is to talk to you. jesus i feel so dead without you. id do anything for you, and that has me scared shitless that im so in love that id do anything even after all thats happened between us. ill love you forever, and the worst part about it, is ill be telling my kids about you. ill tell my kids that i had this girlfriend in high school, and that i still love her more than i love their own mother. i know for a fact ill never love again, itll all just be lust. my heart belongs to you, and youll have it forever. nobody else will ever have it. nobody else.. ill never stop loving you. jesus i want to drop out of high school entirely because the thought of it makes me think of you. im willing to ruin my entire life over you, and maybe thats what i need to do. ill spend an eternity in hell for what ive done to you, and that eternity will be my soul and heart being torn as i watch the one thing ive ever cared about be happy without me. i feel so gone. so dead.. so useless. my parents were right. im just useless. im a piece of shit. im an asshole. but she is..she is still everything i wrote a year ago. but what i am, i am a man, im not a man. i am a boy who is dead inside, and will always love you. id die for you..id do anything for you. say the words and i would do it. anything baby..id do anything for you. and i hate myself for that. i hate myself for loving you. i hate myself for losing you. i fucking hate myself. i want you, and i would do anything. i cant express that enough..anything.. ill never forget you, and i know that because this pain in my heart will never leave. my soul has been crushed. my world has been crushed. im so fucked..i have so much hate for myself that the love i had for you equaled it out. but now that i cant love you, the only thing in my heart is hatred for myself, and the memory of the love i used to be able to express for you. i miss you.. i fucking miss you and the only thing in this world that could make me feel whole again would be to see your smile..your lips on mine..the sound of your voice..god i hate myself for letting you go. you left. call it what you want, bottom line youre gone and i have no will to do anything anymore because of it. i cant remember the last time i laughed, the last time i smiled. but i can remember the sound of your voice, those eyes, your hand in mind. i remember. and ill never forget. i never want to forget, because the love i have for you is the only thing that makes me feel like a human being and not a fucking monster. i love you. i love you so much. i love you. baby.. goodbye my love. its been so long, but for you, it was time. ill never find a time to get over you. ill never do anything without remembering you. im so sorry..and im so in love with you. i love you so much. all of the things ive been doing lately dont feel the same. even crying without you doesnt feel the same. i hate it..but i love you. even my writing feels worst. this letter or, whatever this shit is, it doesnt feel good. its a mess, but its my genuine thoughts. i need you right now.. nobody will ever compare to you, and i never want anybody else. ill never forget. fuck.. im sorry. i love you baby.. i love you. goodbye.. you are the love of my life, and you always will be. she will be loved, and loved i made sure to do. ill never stop loving her, even when shes with another, ill still love her. all my friends are worried about me. my family. jesus even random people at school are asking me. i guess ive started to look how i feel. im scared that ill never stop loving you, but the truth, i never want to stop loving you. because something as beautiful as the love i have for you, is something special. almost as special as you.. i dont know how to end this. i dont know where to end this. theres so much on my mind. i didnt know one person could have so much impact on me. i didnt know the topic of one person could make me write non stop over her. you were the love of my life. and now i understand the meaning of it. ill love you for the rest of my life, even when i never see you again, ill always think of you. ill always dream of you. ill always love you. ill always fucking love you. i get the meaning of love, and to me, the meaning of love was you and i together. ill never get to experience that again. ill never forget you. and ill never be the same without you. i love you so fucking much. i am in love with you.

lil-ustrate  asked:

First off I'd like to say your art is absolutely amazing and I love it! And second, as a still developing artist myself, I tend to get really picky with my work sometimes and then end up frustrated when it doesn't go well 😓 Do you have any tips on just relaxing when it comes to my work rather then stressing over every little detail?

it’s common to get frustrated, sadly every artist goes thru it and believe me if i wasn’t such a frustrated person there’d be 80% more content in this blog

i dont know how i can help you in particular, artists can get frustrated for very different things!! i can tell you what frustrates me and how i deal with it, yeah? i hope it helps any sort of way

  1. dont, absolutely dont stay hours without breaks on the same work. this is the number one way to get angry at what youve done. the longer you stay fixated on one thing, the more you realize the mistakes, and the less you progress because you just keep being held back to correct these mistakes. now, im not saying you shouldnt correct them, but sometimes its better to go around them; finish your picture! get through with it and see how everything looks. once its done? take a got damn break. play a game, read a book, a fic, go for a walk. when you come back, you’ll be refreshed, and you’ll see your mistakes in a different light and you’ll have regained motivation to fix them.
  2. correlated to the last point, dont make a fixation on details that you know aren’t your forte! if you just cant get it right, you wont get it right by pushing and pushing for hours. the longer you stay on one thing, the more your perception of it will twist and become subjective. just leave it. the only way to get better at it is most obviously to practice. and practice =/= perfection.
  3. noticing mistakes after you posted a pic? noticed something on art you did a week ago? don’t correct it. keep it. keep your mistakes. look at them and remember that its a thing youve done, and that now that youve noticed it, you wont do it again, you can correct it on your next piece. dont feel ashamed of what youve done, your brain will think “everyone will notice this mistake” but chances are just 1 out of 100 fools will because theyre more amazed by the whole picture than this little detail. and fuk people who make fun of your mistakes, cuz theyre unappreciative little jerks for the effort you’ve put into doing everything else and its just one detail thats wrong so what does it even matter
  4. DONT!!! DONT THROW YOUR OLD ART!!!! its a primary source of satisfaction. dont you ever feel proud when you put your old art side by side with your latest piece and jsut think “s/o to my brain for remodelling itself to allow me to get better at this”
  5. mostly when i feel like im having a bad art day, i just accept it. it happens to the best of us, its normal. what to do? leave it. if you really feel like after 10 doodles (cause you really need at least a few doodles here and there to check if youre really having a bad art day) youre just really not winging it, let loose and come back after a few hours. its ok to give up, i knnow a lot of posts out there say DONT GIVE UP!! which just makes people feel worse when they do, but look, its fine. youre not being timed. you have all the time to get better, so its fine to give up for a few because its just not sinking in.
  6. get inspired. and heres where it may vary for some people; some artists get motivated by looking at ‘better’ artists (i know a friend like that n it amazes me) and just whip up a pencil and get to it. some people on the contrary get dejected when they see ‘better’ artists, (and, listen, your ‘level of goodness’ is a fully subjective concept, even if in some technicality it can be objective, but dont just judge how good you are based on how you perceive other’s art), if you’re one of those people, then dont go looking around tumbler, watch movies. read books. you dont need to look at other drawings/paintings to get inspired, inspiration comes from anything. from real life too!! get inspired by things that dont concern drawing.
  7. people might look scornfully at this one, but its not a bad thing to do; theres other artists out there yeah? they make mistakes too. look out for them. notice them. no, dont go and tell them ‘you did this’ thats not what youre doing it for, most artist dont want to hear about it unless its from a trusted friend, youre doing it to prevent from doing it yourself. someone did this mistake before you did it, and you have it presented to yourself so you wont do it in your turn. i do get a lot of my energy from looking at others’ mistakes and actively working my way around those. and look, by posting your pictures that have mistakes, you may also actively help other artists who will notice that mistake and help them realize not to do it. im sure my art has TONS of mistakes and i hope when ppl see them its helpful in a way. does this look like a mean and selfish method to you? its fine, you dont gotta!
  8. lastly, the hardest thing to accept is critics and foreign point of views. when i show what i drew to my non-artist parents, they just say “nice” and yes, it feels like they dont fucking care. well, keep on showing it to other people, theres bound to be someone who will be head over heels, dont give up at the first opinion! the one that will gloat over your work is the one who will help you the most to continue. as for critics? yes, there will be those nagging people who will say “this looks odd” they may generally not mean bad, and even if they do, ignore it. its just this one dink who thinks theyre entitled to tell what is good or bad. but to those who dont mean bad, there might be a reason why they think something looks odd. well, look into it. look what your art gives off that they might think is weird, make a mistakes checklist, sometimes its not even the details but the composition, the overall picture. sometimes it doesnt quite fit. you may have drawn everything perfectly, but the composition is bad. yes, that happens! you can be excellent with anatomy but suck at making a good picture. remember to always cool your brain off that picture for a few hours and come back to it, a refreshed mind is sharper to mistakes and oddities.

hope this helped, boy, i wasnt expecting to write SO much. keep on rocking that art buddy

Science teacher

This is my first story so it might be a little bad but i hope you enjoy it!
***

I was fourteen-years old and in the ninth grade. Mr. Jovelo had been my science teacher when I was in the sixth, seventh and eighth grade.

Mr. Jovelo was in his thirties and very tall, 6'4. He was always well-groomed, clean cut, attractive and well built. He had very dark black hair, that was always neatly trimmed, brown eyes, full lips and an always ready smile. And a bubble but that made all the girls swoon, it was a lot more difficult for a horny, gay teen-age boy.

Mr. Jovelo had us do an group assigment with three other people. Usually i went with my friends and started the questions on the board. “Ok class, you have to answer in complete sentences” he said, finishing writing up the last question.

Now Mr. Jovelo is usually never careful were he sits, he’s sat on more kids in his life than chairs. Mr. Jovelo always says its an “accident” but i feel like he does it on purpose. I’ve never been sat by him before, but with a butt like that i wouldnt mind.

My shoulder partner called over Mr. Jovelo and came over to my side. My partners,including myself, didnt notice him coming and he just sat on me. I froze, i didnt know what to do but to enjoy it.

Im usually quiet in the group so my partners didnt notice i was under him, but he did. Mr jovelo started wiggling around and bouncing up and down a little. I instantly got hard and almost came on the spot. Finally Mr. Jovelo realized and got up.“Sorry i didnt see you there..” he said with a smirk, “but must i say you’re pretty comfortable to sit on” and winked.

“Uh, a-anyways we need help with question four…” i said. He helped us find the answer and left. Throughout the whole assignment i couldnt stop thinking what he said, you’re very comfortable to sit on. While i was replaying the moment in my head i forgot we were going over the questions

“Jake…JAKE” Mr. Jovelo almost shouted. I was frozen, embarresed by my daydreaming i could speak. “Fine if you won’t answer,I’ll see you after class”

***
“So jake why didn’t you answer the question today?” Mr. Jovelo said. “I-i was distracted” i answered. He got up from his seat and approached me, “ Was it because i sat on you?” he said with a smile that makes everyone melt inside. I didnt answer unsure of what to say.

“I felt your little friend was a little excited wasnt he? I bet you would like me to sit on you again wouldn’t you?” Mr. Jovelo said patting his bubble butt.

“I guess i would” i said without thinking. He laughed and sat back down in his chair “Take a seat i want to give you something”. I sat in the chair infront of him. Mr. Jovelo pulled out a plastic cup and poured in a liquid i couldnt identify.

Taking this as a sign i drank it, it was sweet with a bitter after taste. “What was that?” i asked. A smirk quickly appeared on his face. “Oh you’ll find out eventually”. What did he mean by that? Suddenly my vision clouded, the last thing i saw was Mr. Jovelo mouth, can’t wait till we get home.

***

I woke up in a strange room. I looked around but it was too dark to see. Where am i? I tried to get up but i couldn’t. My body couldn’t move and the air was kind of stuffy. Suddenly the weight on me lifts off and a wave of fresh air hits me. “Good morning sleepy head” a familiar voice said, “ Do you enjoy the view” he said showing off his giant bubble butt. Ive never seen a butt so huge, his underwear seemed to be at the point of breaking wanting to release those two huge mounds of meat

Once my vision cleared i saw Mr. Jovelo standing over me, he was a giant from my point of view. “Whats going on Mr. Jovelo?” i asked confused.

“Remeber that drink i gave you? It shrunk you down to 4 tiny little inches, now you’re a little ant compared to me.” A rush of emotions ran over me, a little more turn on than scared and confused.

“What about my family and my friends? They’ll worried sick about me, i have to go back to my normal size please” i said. Laughing he said “ Oh don’t worry about that i told your family you were sent off to a program in London for a couple of years, to will improve your science skills and they ate that up like hungry wolfs” he said confident in his plan.

I stood there unable to speak. I couldn’t think or even function with all this information. “But why me? Why not anyone else?”

He got face to face with me “Oh thats easy, ive known you liked my ass for years,and youre the smartest in the class so it made sense to pick you for my made up story” he said. But there was still something bugging me more than anything

“What am i even doing here in your house anyways Mr. Jovelo?”. He released a big burp that almost knocked me down. “ Ive been working on that drink for years, mixing differnet chemicals to shrink a human completely and once it was done i had to test it out on someone” he laughed and continued “ I always needed an ass slave to worship every inch of my ass and you seemed to fit what i looked in for a slave”.

My heart almost left my body. I was taken away from my family,friends and my whole life to become an ass slave.

“Mr. Jovelo this is crazy!! You have to-” i was interrupted by another burp that succsefully knocked me down this time.

“Oh Jake do you think i care? Now if you dont mind its time for me to watch tv shows” he said standing up.

His ass blocked the light and all i could see was his ass eating at his underwear and a sweat line going down his beautiful crack. I stood there in fear and lust seeing his ass approach closer and closer.

“Oh and jake?” he said stopping “ Dont call me Mr. Jovelo anymore… Call me master from now on, and you’ll be addressed as slave"  and with that final sentence his bubble butt engulfed my tiny body

***

I’ve lost track of the time under his sweaty ass. I didnt have any trouble breathing but man it reaked really bad in there. Soon after i realized my tiny face was on his asshole.

Great. This is what i have to do untill i die, living servicing my science teacher.

In the middle of my thought he let out a wet fart. “I hope you dont mind, I’ve had at least 60 deviled eggs for dinner today and they make me very gassy” he said as he farted once more, longer than the last one

The smell was unbearable i couldnt stand it. I almost threw up each time i inhaled. “Slave i want you to purify my farts, i don’t want to smell a thing when i fart, slave and if i do you’ll experience the worst punishment of smells in your life” he said farting again.

Afraid and not wanting to face this punishment i inhaled his fart, gagging each time. “Thats how its done slave very well”

***

Hours went by and countless farts were released. “Ahh i think i might hit the hay slave”

He got up and fished me out from in between his ass and set me by the counter. Dazzed i didnt move much. “I just wanted to see you one more time before bed slave” he said charmingly

“Hope you enjoyed our little session today, because its about to get a lot better” he said

He grabbed me and started moving me towards his ass. “Mr. Jovelo please dont!”
He stopped suddenly and brought me close to his face. “I told you to call me master, slave.” he said, “ since i feel nice today and this is your first day you’ll face something somewhat similar”

He set me down and pulled of his boxer briefs. I was mesmerized by the sight, his ass cheeks were bouncing with freedom and his cock and balls were huge. He left the room and came back with a thong

“What is that?!” I asked. He picked me up and placed me in the little pocket designed for a shruken person. “Oh its something to help you remember to call me master”

He put on the thong, he spread apart his ass cheeks so i would meet his asshole faster Once he finally got my face on his asshole he let go of his mounds closing me in a fart oven.


“Do you like it? I designed it myself. Now everytime i fart you can smell purify the fart! Aren’t you glad to have such a generous master?” he said farting

“This is inhumane-” i was cut off by a wet fart. “I don’t want anyone smelling any farts tomorrow slave, we’ll be going to school where you’ll sniff my farts all day without anyone knowing but me” Mr. Jovelo i mean… My master said

“Well nap time slave!” he said and layed down.
***
I couldn’t sleep through night with my master farting every 5 minutes, like a ticking bomb.
Tomorrow wouldnt be any better

Control
  • MC x Jumin 
  • MC Name: Alison 
  • Special Note: This is a twist on @im-gay-for-dr-pepper‘s headcon about Jumin’s dad forcing MC and Jumin to split so he can marry Sarah. I just read their happier ending and got this devilish idea so enjoy! You inspired me to write this babe!
  • Rating: Angst, Horror, Vulgar Language, Blood
  • a/n: Be sure to give the inspo a read please! 
  • Like my writing? Check out my masterpost here! I write for a few fandoms!

“I cannot leave her Father,” Jumin said again, pleaded practically, as his father gave him a level glare.

“I’ve told you my conditions Jumin. I expect your answer by noon today. Go now.” He dismissed him without any emotion, proceeding to go back to his own work without any hesitation.

How was it that he felt hurt by his fathers actions? A year ago he would haven’t batted a eye to his fathers cold behavior and now? Now he was wishing there was a way to make him understand––to feel what he felt inside at his fathers cold words of control. He wasn’t about to let months of waste to be with Alison go down the drain just because he said no. It had to be her. It had to be Alison.

She opened him up to these emotions and feelings and without her he––he stopped his train of thought, mindlessly heading back to his office to find Jaehee waiting for him, holding the door open behind her with two cups of coffee for each.

“I’ve canceled your meeting for today Jumin,” She said, handing him the coffee as she let the door close behind them both so they could talk, “Would you mind filling me in on what has happened now? Cutting spending?”

She didn’t realize the gravity of the conversation that had just happened. She awaited a arrogant brush of a hand as he diligently went back to work. But his eyes stayed hallow as he looked out the window, his back to hers.

“I have to choose,” He said, waiting for her to chime in. But she waited to, because she didn’t want to believe the words he just spoke, “…the company or Alison.”

“But––” Jaehee began, her mind working fast trying to find some sort of loophole to Jumin fathers demands.

“It has to be her Jaehee.” He said flatly, turning to face her, “It has to.”

“I-I know Jumin,” Jaehee said, but even she knew that once Jumin told Alison about today she wouldn’t let him do that to himself. She would push him away for his business, for his employees, his father. She was too good that way, “You need to talk to her.”

He knew that. Of course Jumin Han knew that. But he didn’t want to. Because talking about it meant succumbing to the reality that they could not be a they anymore but a Jumin and a Alison. Not together, not a pair, not a couple. They would be separate––separated by his fathers own unreasonable demands. He had no control over the situation anymore and there was nothing he could do. His father set this in motion and it was up to Alison on deciding how it ended. 

Keep reading

Placebo lyrics sentence starters
  • "I've never been an extrovert, but i'm still breathing."
  • "I gotta get high, before I go outside."
  • "I'm in alcoholic kind of mood."
  • "I know, you've got me wrapped around your finger."
  • "I know, the past will catch you up as you run faster."
  • "I know, the last in line is always called a bastard."
  • "We were born to lose."
  • "It's either you or me."
  • "S/he stole the keys to my house and then s/he locked herself/himself out."
  • "I'm confused and racked with self-doubt."
  • "Don't you wish you'd never met her/him?"
  • "You don't care about us."
  • "You're too complicated, we should separate it."
  • "Think I'll leave it all behind, save this bleeding heart of mine."
  • "I'll take it by your side."
  • "Without you, I'm Nothing."
  • "Without you, I'm Nothing at all."
  • "Don't let me down."
  • "Your smile would make me sneeze."
  • "I'd pay to have you near."
  • "Don't forget to breathe."
  • "Another love I would abuse, no circumstances could excuse."
  • "I know I'm selfish, I'm unkind."
  • "There's nothing here but what here's mine."
  • "Never thought I'd fill with desire."
  • "Never thought I'd feel so ashamed."
  • "Never thought all this could back fire."
  • "Never thought you'd fuck with my brain."
  • "Say goodbye."
  • "You must realise that you're never alone."
  • "I'm a man, a liar."
  • "Now it takes him all day just to get an erection."
  • "Things aren't what they seem."
  • "I dream of a face that is pure as perfection."
  • "Hey motherfucker, I'm after you. I know where you live."
  • "Change your taste in men."
  • "Come back to me."
  • "Join the masquerade."
  • "I'll describe the way I feel; weeping wounds that never heal."
  • "No escaping gravity."
  • "Draw your final breath."
  • "Every time I rise I see you falling."
  • "Can you find me space inside your bleeding heart?"
  • "I was never faithful, and I was never one to trust."
  • "I'm forever black-eyed, a product of a broken home"
  • "I was never grateful, that's why I spend my days alone."
  • "I wrote this novel just for you."
  • "I wrote this novel just for you, that's why it's vulgar, that's why it's blue."
  • "Those motherfuckers got it wrong."
  • "They said I should get expensive help to fix my head."
  • "I don't care for myself."
  • "Run away from all your boredom."
  • "Run away from all your whoredom."
  • "All it takes is one decision."
  • "Run away!"
  • "You're the one who's always bruised and broken."
  • "I understand the fascination."
  • "I understand the fascination, I've even been there once or twice or more."
  • "Please don't die."
  • "It seemed a place for us to dream."
  • "Love can die."
  • "Wake up..."
  • "I've got problems with the booze, nothing left to lose."
  • "I'm faithless... I'm scared."
  • "I'm on my own for far too long."
  • "She's insane, this friend of mine."
  • "Always stays the same, nothing ever changes."
  • "Hold your breath and count to ten."
  • "Beware this troubled world."
  • "Soulmate dry your eye."
  • "Soulmates never die."
  • "Hush, it's okay."
  • "See you at the bitter end."
  • "There's something rotten down here..."
  • "Don't forget to be the way you are."
  • "The only thing you can rely on is that you can't rely on anything."
  • "Don't go and sell your soul for self-esteem."
  • "Remember me..."
  • "Well I've seen you suffer, I've seen you cry the whole night through..."
  • "I'll be your father, I'll be your mother, I'll be your lover, I'll be yours."
  • "I'll be yours."
  • "Well I've seen you suffer, I've seen you cry for days and days..."
  • "You never were a genius."
  • "Yes I know you're the jealous type."
  • "Walk away!"
  • "Protect me from what I want..."
  • "Maybe we're victims of fate."
  • "Remember when we'd celebrate? We'd drink and get high until late."
  • "Now we're all alone."
  • "Come on fallen star I refuse to let you die."
  • "I've been waiting far too long!"
  • "Be mine."
  • "I was alone, falling free..."
  • "What happened to us, what happened to me?"
  • "Baby...did you forget to take your meds?"
  • "I was alone, falling free, trying my best not to forget."
  • "I will be the one to make you crawl!"
  • "I came down to wish you an unhappy birthday."
  • "Someone call the ambulance..There's gonna be an accident."
  • "I can see in the dark."
  • "I will be the one to watch you fall."
  • "I will find you!"
  • "You're always ahead of the game, I drag behind."
  • "You possess every trait that I lack."
  • "You got A's on your algebra test, I failed and they kept me behind."
  • "I just gotta get off my chest, that I think you're divine."
  • "You let me down before."
  • "I'm medicated...How are you?"
  • "It's the pills that bring you down."
  • "It's between you and me."
  • "It's the pills that pick you up."
  • "It's the special way we fuck."
  • "Fall into you, is all I seem to do..."
  • "I'm afraid to be alone."
  • "This house is no longer a home."
  • "Don't give up on the dream!"
  • "Tear us in two, is all it's gonna do."
  • "Don't go and leave me."
  • "Please don't drive me blind."
  • "I'd fill your every breath with meaning."
  • "I'll find a place we both could hide."
  • "You don't believe me."
  • "You do this everytime."
  • "I know we're broken."
  • "Your eyes forever glued to mine."
  • "I know I broke it."
  • "I know I broke you."
  • "It's horrid to see you again."
  • "When I dream, I dream of your lips."
  • "When I dream, I dream of your kiss."
  • "When I dream, I dream of your fists."
  • "I was not honest."
  • "And I'll wait my turn,to terrorize you."
  • "Can't you see these skies are breaking?"
  • "one of a kind is all I own."
  • "I wanna try but I get annoyed."
  • "In the cold light of morning the party gets boring, you're high."
  • "In the cold light of morning,You're drunk sick from whoring and high."
  • "You are one of God's mistakes."
  • "You're a waste of skin."
  • "You're waste of space."
  • "It's a song to say goodbye."
  • "Well now you need me more than I need you."
  • "You wanna know, know that it doesn't hurt me?"
  • "It doesn't hurt me."
  • "You don't want to hurt me."
  • "So much hate for the ones we love."
  • "Tell me, we both matter, don't we?"
  • "Let me steal this moment from you now."
  • "The way you're dancing makes me come alive."
  • "Move closer, I wanna feel your touch."
  • "The way you're moving, makes you all that I desire."
  • "You are the one who took my place."
  • "And it was a leap of faith I could not take."
  • "And it was a promise I could not make."
  • "You are getting in the way!"
  • "I have nothing left to say."
  • "I will pretend it didn't hurt."
  • "You are a cheap and nasty fake."
  • "I am the bones you couldnt break!"
  • "I always aimed to please."
  • "I nearly died."
  • "For what it's worth?"
  • "Come on walk with me."
  • "Got no friends, got no lover."
  • "I've been wasting all my time!"
  • "I got no energy to fight."
  • "I don't see the point in trying."
  • "All of my wrongs, and all my wicked ways,Will come back to haunt me."
  • "He wrote all the songs I hope to write someday."
  • "Looks like the devil is here to stay."
  • "We'll kiss and tremble with the delight."
  • "I had so very much to say."
  • "I pretended I was okay."
  • "So I haven't given up."
  • "A heart that hurts, is a heart that works."
  • "No one can take it/you away from me."
  • "I long, I burn to touch her/him/you just the same."
  • "Don't let them get their way!"
  • "There is no law we/you must obey!"
  • "Damn you all to hell!"
  • "Time will help you through..."
  • "The sound of silence grows."
  • "The two of us are rebels."
  • "The payback is here, take a look, it's all around you."
  • "You thought you'd never shed a tear."
  • "This ain't no singing in the rain."
  • "You can run but you can't hide!"
  • "No one here gets out alive."
  • "Breathe me every time you close your eyes..."
  • "Taste me every time you cry."
  • "This memory will fade away and die."
  • "Just for today, breathe me and say goodbye..."
  • "How many times?!"
  • "Now I can't look you in the eye!"
  • "And I don't even want to try."
  • "Every word from you is a lie."
  • "I'm always falling on my face."
  • "I don't think that you're aware of the cost."
  • "Stupid me to believe that I could trust in stupid you!"
  • "Don't leave me here to pass through time!"
  • "I don't know where to begin."
  • "Don't leave me here."
  • "I'm sick of fighting..."
  • "The cold is biting..."
  • "My broken spirit is frozen to the core."
  • "Don't wanna be here no more."
  • "Wouldn't it be good to be in your shoes?"
  • "And wouldn't it be good if we could wish ourselves away?"
  • "You must be joking!"
  • "You don't even know a thing about it!"
  • "You've got no problem."
  • "I'd stay right there if I were you!"
  • "The grass is always greener over there."
  • "I don't want to be alone."
  • "I'm alive, so alive."
  • "I'm in a desperate situation."
  • "Now there's a hand print on your cheek."
  • "Is it my imagination?"
  • "Let me pay you back in kind."
  • "I always watch you when you're dreaming"
  • "I always watch you when you're dreaming because I know it's not of me."
  • "I smoke a dozen cancer sticks."
  • "We run for our lives."
  • "Promise me that we will make it through."
  • "Don't worry baby - it's just the end of the world."
  • "I refuse to remain in regrets."
  • "I've existed too long in secrets."
  • "Help me start to heal."
  • "Every one of my needs will be met."
  • "I refuse to be left behind."
  • "I know you want to stop."
  • "Be glad for what you got."
  • "I recognize the smile."
  • "There are some things I cannot forget."
  • "It may be for a while, I'll pretend we've never met."
  • "And maybe we will part."
  • "Will your paranoia keep you warm?"
  • "I will still enjoy to watch you fall."
  • "Stop!"
  • "I try every day"
  • "I try every day, to think of something deep to say."
  • "If I am an extra in the film of my own life, then who the hell is the director?"
  • "Show me how to live."
  • "There's a riot in my head."
  • "Let's fight until the end of days."
  • "Let's destroy and let's devastate."
  • "I know where you live."
  • "Time is money, bastard."
  • "You are so beautiful."
  • "Love claims to have the answer."
  • "Can you imagine a love that is so proud?"
  • "We are loud like love!"
  • "If you were mine, then we would know!"
  • "And with our bodies entwined we will know paradise."
  • "My computer thinks I'm gay."
  • "I got too many friends."
  • "I'll never be there for you/them."
  • "I am a small and gentle man."
  • "Hold on to me..."
  • "My behaviour is hard to understand."
  • "But I'm still doing all I can, to try and get me some redemption."
  • "And I'm knee deep in sinking sand, crying out for your attention!"
  • "Rob the bank!"
  • "Take me home, then make love."
  • "There wasn't much I used to need..."
  • "Now my mistakes are haunting me."
  • "I've lost the power to understand what it takes to be a man."
  • "You tried your best to be a friend to my heart."
  • "I saw you wanted this to end."
  • "Please no grieving, my love, understand?"
  • "Now I feel I've lost my spark."
  • "Can't you see I'm sick of fighting?"
  • "Can't you see I've lost my way?"
  • "All my dreaming torn in pieces..."
  • "As you wake does he smother you in kisses long and true?"
  • "Want you so bad I can taste it!"
  • "If I could, I would hover while he's making love to you, make it rain as I cry."
  • "Your touch, I cannot regret!"
  • "You're so my kind."
  • "You're so my kind, erotic and devine."
  • "To me you're more than a human, you are more complex."
  • "You are like a fallen angel."
  • "Look me in the eyes, say that again."
  • "Knock me off my feet like heroin."
  • "No need to disguise or to pretend."
  • "Tonight's the night that we begin the end."
  • "I tried, God knows, I tried."
  • "There's nothing you can do to change my mind."
  • "I don't enjoy to watch you cry."
  • "Blame me for the sorry state you're in."
  • "I love you more than any man, but something's getting in the way."
  • "I do you harm because I can for the second time today."
  • "When I get drunk, you take me home and keep me safe from harm."
  • "I ask you for another second chance, but then I drink it all away."
  • "I was so delicate when we began, so tender when I spoke your name."
  • "Now I'm nothing but a partisan to my compulsion and my shame."
  • "You know, I'm grateful, I appreciate."
  • "Then I run away to wonderland, and disappear without trace."
  • "Can't you see there's a world out there?"
  • "Don't be scared."
  • "Babe I'm gonna be your man!"
  • "And it's plain to see you were meant for me."
  • "I wanna be your toy."
  • "I've been smoking too long."
  • "I wanna turn you on."
  • "I'm only a person."
  • "Open up your heart, let me slip inside."
  • "Lie to me."
  • "Drink you pretty."
  • "My mother told me, that you're never lonely when you're laughing all the time."
  • "My father told me, that you're always lonely when they're all laughing at you."
  • "He tries to impress her, mentally undress her."
  • "Theres a look on your face I would like to knock out."
  • "All I want is to see you in terrible pain."
  • "Theres no light in your eyes and your brain is too slow."
  • "Fuck you."
  • "So fuck you anyway."
  • "Makes me sick when I hear all the shit that you say."
  • "Theres a time for us all and I think yours has been, can you please hurry up cos I find you obscene?"
  • "I cant wait for the day that you're never around, when that face isn't here and you rot underground."
  • "Your eyes are almost dead."
  • "I wanna be much more like you."
  • "I wanna take a bath with you."
  • "I wanna say I do."
  • "The way your smile lights up the room."
  • "To jealousy I'll stay immune."
  • "She's a faker, always let's me down."
  • "Don't you make me frown."
  • "I never wanted the real thing."
  • "I didn't mean it."
  • "I'm the one to blame."
  • "Did too much cocaine..."
  • "One more time for me."
  • "Put your hands in the air, and wave them like you give a fuck!"
  • "The only place you’re truly free is cosy in your dreams."
  • "We need to concentrate on more then meets the eye."
  • "Patience comes to the ugly, not me."
  • "Laughter comes to the lucky, not me."
  • "Where is my mind?"
  • Miyano: Since we're done with voicing the series [at this point], I want you to forget [the aftermath] for a bit and tell us about how you felt acting that scene in episode 11. There hadn't been a moment before where Haruka's emotions exploded like that [in the argument scene between Makoto and Haruka]. How was it? Were you nervous?
  • Shimazaki: I WAS nervous! I was anxious about showing Haruka's character [the right way] and worried about how he would appear to everyone. Throughout the ENTIRE second season, Haruka is worried and lost about his future and what he'll do…
  • Miyano: The worrying protagonist (trope).
  • Shimazaki: Yeah. I actually really like those, when someone in their youth is worrying about the changes that lie ahead. Rin always appeared bright to Haruka since the first episode. When [Rin] decided right away [in childhood] on what he wanted to do and when he said he would make the best team, he looked sparkling-- but [Haruka] himself didn't have that. Of course, [Haruka] wants to swim for his team, but when it came to his future, he didn't have anything. A normal high school kid, at least in my experience, doesn't decide that clearly on what they want for their future.
  • Miyano: Yeah, not everyone is like that.
  • Shimazaki: They could go to university and stretch out their feelers on what they'd like to do there. But for Haruka [because of his skill], he is at that moment, being pressured to decide. So I could understand why he would feel lost. As Haruka, I felt that he's the kind who is very sensitive of others emotions and takes that in [whether he wants to or not]… so he feels very sensitively the expectations and wishes of everyone and the unknown scouts around him-- and he's unable to let that slide off of him. It makes him feel even more down and uncertain. When Haruka acts based on his emotions, that's when things go well for him, I guess is the way to say. Through his emotions he gets stronger [emotionally]; he's firm about what he likes, what he dislikes, and about his desire to swim. But since his future got involved this time, he went by what he thought instead, using logic and stuff that he normally doesn't think with [rather than what he instinctively felt], so he got stuck for longer than he should have. As I'm sure you've already seen in episode 12-- no matter how much he worried, if he'd just thought "I want to swim"… it wouldn't have been the answer to everything, but it would have helped a great deal for him on an emotional level in feeling that his future was free to pursue. But because he went with logic instead, it made him feel more and more dejected. That was the flow of the story in episode 11, but in episode 9 he also blew up at Rin, right? So in that situation where everyone is coming down at him about deciding his future, here comes his Iwatobi friends who didn't really speak to him that much about it. First, there's Nagisa and Rei, who told him how they felt about it kindly, in a gentleman-like way. And Haruka isn't able to push them away about it because he loves them, he understands how they're feeling, and he knows that they're being nice about it. But because he doesn't understand [what to do], he says as much and he runs away. Then, here comes the last stronghold, Makoto. In the scene before it, there was one where [Haruka] is on edge because they're talking about what they'll do after graduation, and Makoto reads the atmosphere and says normal everyday things like "Why don't we go to the festival?" to help Haruka to relax. So [Haruka] feels grateful to Makoto about that, but since Makoto wants to talk about his own future too, he gets upset again. To me, Makoto was really the last stronghold. [Makoto] doesn't push [Haruka] or force him into something, and [Makoto] stays by his side while he's worrying about his future like this. He kind of stagnates with him, and you think there could be a bit of dependency involved, but now this last stronghold comes to tell him to not run away. That's why it shook Haruka really hard.
  • Miyano: He must have felt really pained by it.
  • Shimazaki: When he said "Not you too!" his expression was one of deep anguish.
  • Miyano: Despite what [Haruka] said, you could tell [from that scene] that he relied on Makoto a great deal… But since he's thinking a great deal and feeling confused about his future while being shown all these different paths by other people, Haruka must have felt that he wanted to change, right?
  • Shimazaki: Yes!
  • Miyano: If he really didn't care [about changing] and he liked the way he was now, then it wouldn't affect him at all. Since he feels confused about it, though, he must be feeling deep inside that he wants to do something about himself, or feels that he must. But since that's a different style from his usual, he doesn't know why he feels irritated but he can't help feeling irritated.
  • Shimazaki: Yes.
  • Miyano: If he really didn't feel anything, he could just keep on swimming. But when that staircase [to move ahead to his future] was prepared for him, he did take a proper moment to think about whether he wanted to climb it or not.
  • Shimazaki: Yes.
  • Miyano: So in the end, he takes that first step up towards adulthood…
  • Shimazaki: Why do you make that sound so chic?
  • Miyano: ROFL.
  • Shimazaki: No, sorry for interrupting, we're on a serious subject.
  • Miyano: So, in the end, he's able to feel that he does indeed have something fierce inside himself. That made me very happy to see, even as the audience.
  • Shimazaki: Yes. When [Haruka] first felt that Rin was a bright presence, that's what it was. In his nightmare, he sees Rin holding his hand out while this huge light shines from behind him. So, him thinking that Rin is bright is him thinking that the world [that Rin is in] is a bright one.
  • Miyano: Yeah, maybe somewhere in his heart he wanted to be in that world too, but when he realized that, he still thought "That's not cool" or "That's not true." So [not being honest with himself] is what keeps things from getting better for him.
  • Shimazaki: Yes.
  • Miyano: But by facing it… or rather, by having friends who make him face it… Within this Free! group, each person lived each moment of real life with value and they each shown through with great charm.
  • Shimazaki: It was very human-like drama, especially seeing Haruka being confused about his life and running away from it. Humans aren't like a book, they come with all sorts of contradicting emotions.
I'm so so Sorry (Suga Scenario)
Scenario requested by ‘Haru Anon’ :P when you come home late from work and Suga gets angry at you and he ends up hitting you, BUT with a happy ending :) Enjoy 
—————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————— You had a terrifying long day at work. Your co-workers were pissing you off, your boss was getting on your nerves and all you were doing was some stupid paper work. You hated your job all you wanted to do was being home, sitting on the couch, being on your laptop or watching TV and stuff your belly with food, and most importantly being together with your boyfriend Yoongi. You were so happy when the clock showed that there were a few minutes left in hell.  But than your Boss surprised you with guess what, MORE paper work.  You stayed longer as you expected, you actually wanted to send Yoongi a message that you will be home late but you thought that he might be busy with work so you didn’t wrote him anything. After two more hours of work you finally could drive home, it was already pretty dark outside so you tried to come home as fast as you can.  After you finally reached your house you pulled out the keys and got in, you took of your shoes, dropped your back and hung up the coat. You walked into the living room as you saw your boyfriend Yoongi impatiently waiting for you. ‘Im sorry that it took me so long but-,’ you couldn’t finish your sentence because Yoongi interrupted you ,’Where have you been.?’, he asked you with a clearly mad and annoying Voice. You sigh ,’I wanted to tell you, but you interrupted me. So anyway, I was clearly finished with my work, but then my Boss decided to give me some extra work’. What you not realized was that the last sentence sounded so wrong in so many ways. After you saw the shocked expression on Yoongi’s face you realized what you said and you tried to safe it ,’you know I mean he gave me more paper work.!’,SURE, PAPER WORK. IF THATS HOW YOU CALL IT’, it was clearly too late,’NO.! I Did Paper Work, What Do You Think I Did, HUH.?!’,’PAPER WORK.?! MORE THAN FUCKING MY BOSS FOR EXTRA MONEY, HUH.?!’, you couldn’t believe what you heard, fucking my boss for extra money.?! Is he seriously now. ‚’ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME.? I WAITED THE WHOLE ENTIRE DAY TO COME HOME AND SPEND THE NIGHT WITH YOU, BUT YOU HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO THAN YELLING AT ME AND TELLING ME THAT I CHEATED ON YOU.?!?!? ARE YOU SERIOUS.?!?’,’YES I AM.!! I’M SO FUCKING DONE WITH YOUR BULLSHIT.!’  You both were yelling at each other like there were no tomorrow.  ‘IF YOU ARE DONE WITH MY BULLSHIT WHY DONT YOU JUST LEAVE ME.?’,’YOU KNOW WHAT I THINK THATS WHAT IM GONNA DO. YOU CAN GO SUCK SOMEONE ELSES DICK’, he were so arrogant and so mean that your eyes started to get watery, but NO you wouldn’t cry in front of him, you wouldn’t let him win.  ‘ YOUR SUCH AN ASSHOLE.! YOU KNOW WHAT I THINK I’M GONNA GO SUCK SOMEONE ELSES DICK THAN BEING LONGER TOGETHER WITH YOU.!’, in the next moment all you could feel was pain on your right cheek. You drove him to the edge with the last sentence. You were lying on the floor, one hand supported your weight the other one placed on your cheek.  You were in a shock state, you couldn’t think properly. All you knew now was that your Boyfriend, your Boyfriend Yoongi hit you. You stood up slowly, he stood next to you. Disbelief, shock, hate on himself written all over his face. You walked away hugging yourself with one hand and the other still placed on your cheek. You went to the bedroom locked yourself in and laid flatly on the bed and starred at the ceiling, now you let your tears and sobs escape from your eyes and mouth. You curled yourself into a ball and cried yourself to sleep.  Yoongi were sitting on the couch in the living room, he never wanted to hurt you. But now all you did was crying because of him. He heard you crying but he refused to go to you because that would make things worse. He made himself comfortable on the couch and looked at the ceiling thinking about how you must hate him now, how he overreacted, how he was so wrong. He couldn’t even understand how on earth he assumed you were cheating on him. After a while he fell asleep as well.    On the next day you woke up and refused to go out of your room, you got up and walked to the mirror your eyes were a bloody red, swollen and heavy, a bruise stained your cheek. You started to cry again but tried to hold back your sobs without success. Yoongi woke up and immediately stood up, he rubbed his eyes and checked the room, then the apartment to see if you are still here. He sighed in relief as he heard your sobs, he was scared that you left and that he would never see you again. He took a deep breath and knocked on your door ,’(Y/N), please open the door. I’m really sorry’, he said with a soft Voice. You loved it when he spoke with a soft tone, it showed the sweet and caring side of him, but you didn’t answer you were still mad at him and you surely didn’t want to talk to him. But to be honest you wanted to listen what he has to say, so you waited for him to continue.  ‘(Y/N), are you there.? Are you listening.?’, he said with worry in his Voice,’I…I know that you are mad at me, and I know that you probably hate me. But…’, he took another deep breath,’..but i Love you. I can understand that you probably will leave me, that you hate me now. I know a did a huge mistake, I don’t even know how the thought of you cheating on me crossed my mind. I.. I’m just really scared of loosing you, but to be honest I think i already lost you..’, you opened the door and saw Yoongi leaning on the Doorframe supported by his arms. He looked at you, you saw the sadness on his face, his eyes a bit watery. You knew that he never cried, so it was completely new to you, but to be honest the view of him broke your heart.  ‘(Y/N) I’m so so so sor-‚’, he got cut of by you suddenly hugging him tightly. His arms found the there way to your body and soon he hugged you back tightly. He placed a kiss on your Head and mumbled against your hair,’I’m so sorry, please don’t leave me’.’Never’, you mumbled against his chest. —————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————— I hope it’s long enough ;D 
Hope you like it, and send in requests/ questions/ personal question if you want♡
Thank you for your support :3
Secrets - Part 4 (Cake)

Part 1

Part  2 

Part 3

ohhhhhhh shit who she gna choose !!

image

Originally posted by heartbreakirwin

(not my gif)

She stayed up the whole night texting Calum, telling him about them, about herself, about what things used to be like. He hadn’t been this interested in her in a long time, but she knew it wouldn’t last forever. Short term memory loss meant sooner or later he would start to remember things, good and bad.

Early the next morning she got up quitly, tiptoeing around the hotel room doing her best not to wake the guys, especially Luke. She just wanted to be alone with Cal for a little while.

She needed to know if she could still feel the same about him as she once did. She couldn’t help but feel a little excited that he was giving her butterflies again. That he didn’t have a care in the world except her. She’s had this kind of attention from him before, but never imagined that it would ever happen again.

In the back of her mind she knew she was being foolish, and that she shouldn’t get wrapped up with him but she couldn’t help it.

The truth was Calum cheated, she couldn’t ignore that. But this was the old Cal, the one who loved her, the one who she thought would never stray.

She just needed to be close to him, even if only for a few hours, even if only for one last time, she just needed his touch. She needed to know if she could love him still, despite all that has happened.

She scribbled out a quick note to the guys, letting them know she would meet them at the hospital. She grabbed her bag and pulled the door closed gently, only after taking a quick look at Luke who was snoring softly with one of his arms thrown over Mikey’s face. She felt a pang in her stomach looking at him, but she ignored it and went on her way.

She got to the hospital at 8:00 am sharp and was the first person to sign in on the visitors list. When she got to Cal’s room he was siting up in his bed, waiting for her.

“Wow,” he said, “guess your good for keeping promises.”

She laughed a little, “always have been.” she said shrugging a bit.

She went to sit in one of the chairs at the side of his bed, sliding it next to the edge.

“No,” he told her, sliding over to one side of the bed, “come up here, I want to be close to you.” he said, a bit unsure of how she’d react.

She smiled, “Do you want to watch your favorite movie?” she asked, pulling her laptop out of her bag. She hopped up onto the bed next to him, sliding down to find a comfortable spot.

“Sure..what is it again?” he asked, laughing at himself a bit.

She giggled, “Its called Anchor Man .. I think you’ve seen it probably a hundred times before .. which means I’ve maybe seen it fifty… I honestly can’t stand the movie but every time you watch it you laugh like its the first time… and its really cute so I put up with it.”

She paused for a minute after she said it, the way she was talking to him, it was like they were still together, like she was slipping back to the way things were.

She pulled open the laptop screen and opened her library, she could feel him looking down at her over her shoulder, smiling. “Funny this will probably actually be like the first time seeing it,” he chuckled.

She looked up to him, “You still don’t remember anything?” she asked hesitantly.

“Nope,” he shook his head, “not a thing.”

She searched for the movie, then pressed play. As the opening credits began she felt Calum snake his arm around her. She rested her head on his chest and felt her eyes begin to grow heavy.

Just as she was drifiting off, when she couldn’t keep her eyes open any longer after staying up all night, she yawned inhaling deeply, taking in Calum’s scent. Thats when it hit her, that this wasn’t what she wanted anymore, that he wasn’t what she wanted.

She had come to see if things could be the same between them, but she realized now, she didn’t want them to be. She didn’t feel right with him anymore, she didn’t need him like she thought she still might.

Luke was the last thing she thought about before falling asleep, the way he looks at her, the way his touch sends a current through her body. For a split second she pretended that Calum was Luke, that it was Luke she was snuggled up to with his arms around her.

She woke up to the constant buzzing of a cell phone. It was Calums, she noticed it lighting up on the bedside table. The screen of her laptop was black and Cal was fast asleep. It was already 11:00 am, so she had been a sleep for a few hours.

She reached over him to grab his phone, careful not to wake him up. She grabbed it innocently thinking it was one of the guys calling, but it wasn’t, it wasnt a phone call at all.

He was getting text after text from a phone number not stored to his phone, and she didn’t recognize the area code. She punched in his birthday, unlocking the screen. Thats when she realized, it was her.

It was the other girl, sending him paragraphs. She didn’t care to read them, but couldn’t help but scroll up a bit.. just to see what the last thing Calum said to her was.

She felt sick when she got to his most recent message, looking over her shoulder to make sure he was still sound asleep, she began reading. It was from last night, around the same time he was texting her asking all about their relationship.

C- You need to stop fucking trying to contact me ITS OVER y/n and me are back together, we are DONE.

- HAHA you think she’s not going to notice your faking it? … when it blows up in your face you’ll come crawling back to me and you know it.

C- Fuck off you don’t know anything DELETE MY NUMBER

Her stomach was turning, she leaned over and put Calums phone back on the table. He was faking it. She was in literal disbelief. She shifted her body to get up and felt Calum’s arms wrap around her tightly.

“Morning baby,” he mumbled, “Where are you going?”

“I.. uh.. I need to .. run back to the hotel .. I just realized I forgot my phone.”

“Oh.. okay,” he said skeptically.. “You’re coming back, right?”

She tried her best not to show her anger, not to let him know she knew he was a fraud. “Yea..” she forced out, “of course.. I just .. I .. uhh .. I need to talk to Luke.”

His face dropped before raising an eyebrow. ‘FUCK’ she thought, 'Why did I say that?’

She watched his reaction and waited for a response as she shoved her laptop into her bag.

“What could you possibly need to talk to Luke about?” he asked sounding a bit agitated.

She was at a loss for words, all she wanted was to get the fuck out of there. “I uhh .. I’ll be back in a little Cal,” she said quickly before rushing out of the room.

When she finally got out the exit of the hospital she stopped to take a deep breath of fresh air. She should have known having the old Calum back was too good to be true.

She regretted ever going there. She regretted even thinking about the possibility of giving him another chance. She was so stupid for trying to hang on to something that was very over. She wasn’t torn anymore.

She looked up and noticed Ash and Mikey getting out of an SUV a few feet away from her. They walked over when they saw her.

“Hey y/n,” Ash called out.

She looked up at the two of them.

“What’re you doing out here?” Mikey asked looking concerned.

She shrugged her shoulders, “Hospitals, they give me a horrible feeling.. I just .. I need a break for a little while.”

Ash nodded his head, “I know what you mean being here is pretty depressing.”

She smiled weakly, “You have no idea,” she shook her head, “Since you guys are here I think I’m going to head back to the hotel for a little .. try and shake this feeling.”

“Aight,” Mikey nodded his head, “Luke is back there.. said he felt like shit when he woke up … seemed fine to me though.. he should be in the room.”

She gave a half smile before getting into the escalade the boys had just gotten out of. “I’ll see you guys in a little bit” she told them before closing the door.

She asked the driver to take the long way back, that she needed some time to clear her head. She always found watching out the window of a car soothing.

She thought about everything, how she felt about Calum .. it was strange her anger had settled and now more then anything she was just dissappointed in him. Hadn’t he put her through enough? Pretending to still not remember anything was just selfish.

It was hard because she understood why he was doing it. He was taking desperate measures to hold on to her as long as he coud, but at the same time… this was all his fault, he cheated, he knew the consequences.

Then there was Luke, these feelings she had for Luke were so new to her. She couldn’t be around him without feeling drawn to him, needing to be close to him. There was a chemistry between them, a spark that ignighted when they kissed. His touch made her forget about her problems, he made her forget about Calum.

The only thing she knew for sure is that her and Calum were done, they were very done. She didn’t know what Luke wanted, it seemed like he wanted her but the thing is she couldn’t be sure, kissing her in secret was much different then wanting to be with her. He was a loyal friend to Calum, and she knew Cal would never be okay with them together .. so what did that mean?

The driver pulled in front of the hotel and she hopped out, thanking him before walking into the lobby. She made her way into the elevator and then over to the door of the boys suite. She paused before opening it, taking a second to collect herself, to try and slow her heart rate before facing him.

When she opened the door he was sitting on the edge of one of the beds shoving his foot into one of his chucks and begining to tie it. When he heard the door he looked up to her, a shocked expression on his face.

“Hey,” she said lightly.

“Hey.. What are you doing here?” he asked looking back down at his shoe.

She took a few steps towards him, “You don’t look sick” she commented.

“Yea,” he breathed giving a sacrastic chuckle,“I knew seeing the two of you would make me though so I stayed behind.” he wouldn’t look up at her.

She sat next to him on the edge of the bed, “I don’t think you’re going to have to worry about that.” she mumbled.

He turned his head in her direction raising and eyebrow and showing a hint of a smile.

“What is this Luke?” she asked him, “Me and you?.. What is this to you?”

He didn’t answer her, just went back to putting on his shoes.

She layed back on the bed, keeping her knees bent over the edge next to him. She shook her head out of frustration.

“Why did Cal push you?.. The day I first met you both .. Why did he push you into me?” she asked staring up at the ceiling.

Luke looked back at her over his shoulder, “What makes you ask that?”

She ran her fingers through her hair before sitting back up next to him. “I just.. I don’t know Luke .. everything is so different now and maybe I’m wrong but I cant help thinking that maybe Cal pushed you into me on purpose that day.”

He looked at her with a straight face, “He did,” he told her before standing up and walking over to his duffle bag.

She wasn’t letting the conversation end there. “He did because he wanted to get my attention?” she paused lowering her voice a bit, “or because you did?”

He pulled his shirt off over his head before turning to face her, “What does it matter now?” he reached back taking a clean shirt from his bag.

She stood and walked towards him, “I just need to know Luke.. why? why now is there suddenly something between us? Why not that day? Why wasn’t it you?” She ran her fingers gently down his chest.

He looked down at her through sad eyes, “You know me now, y/n, you know how I am .. I’m not like him .. I never stood a chance, you smiled at me and I froze.. and then the second he spoke to you I was invisible.”

Her heart dropped, “Thats not true,” she whispered.

They stood there in silence staring at eachother before Luke moved to pull on his clean shirt. Her thoughts were going wild, she didn’t know what to say, what to do.

She bit her lip and he looked back down to her, standing only a foot away. “It doesn’t matter now y/n.”

“It does Luke, it does to me.” he didnt answer, “Please tell me what this is Luke, I need to know.”

He took a step back, “Even if I tell you that I’m crazy about you and have been since the second I met you, my best mate is still laying in a hospital bed because of me and he thinks that you’re still his.” he exhaled shaking his head, “This is fucked.”

“He’s faking it.” she blurted out.

Luke’s eyes widdened not understanding, “WHAT?” he asked in shock.

“Calum .. hes faking his memory loss.. I .. I don’t know how much of it but he knows about me leaving him, he knows about the other girl.”

“How?” Luke raised his eyebrows unconvinced.

“She was texting him this morning when I was there.. Cal was asleep and I kind of looked at his phone only because it was blowing up and I thought it might be one of you guys… then when I saw it was her I couldn’t help it.. I read some of their messages.. he knows everything.”

“This just keeps getting better..” Luke mumbled, “Does he know that you know?”

“No .. I panicked and left.. I think he knew something was up though… just another secret to add to the list”

“You gotta confront him,” Luke insisted, “This can’t go on forever.”

She took a step back moving to sit on the bed, “I know Luke .. but then what? I tell him its over, again, and then what? I’m back at the airport waiting to board a plane home.”  

He grabbed her hands pulling her up so that she was standing again, just inches away from him, “I don’t want you to leave,” he said softly.

She looked up into his eyes, “I want you Luke,” she said hesitantly,“.. I know that now… I can’t deny it anymore…Its you, I just want you”

“I’ve always wanted you y/n,” he said, voice low as he began to close the space between them, “We’ll figure this out,” he whisped before connecting their lips.

They stayed like that for a while, moving their lips in sync, electricity pulsing through her veins. She’d never felt like this before, not about anyone.

When they finally pulled apart to catch a breath Luke gave her a half smile, “We should go.”

As Luke finished getting ready to go to the hospital Ash and Mikey came back to the hotel room.

“God its so boring there,” Mikey announced as he feel back onto one of the beds.

Ashton agreed, “I felt bad leaving, but man hospitals suck.”

She was relieved they were back, it was time for her to set things straight with Cal.. she’s had enough of the secrets.

When they got to the hospital Luke waited outside as she went in to talk to Cal. He looked up at her from his bed when she walked in the room.

“Hey baby,” he said, “I was starting to worry you weren’t coming back”

“I keep my promises,” she told him, “Remember?”

He smiled and moved over to one side of the bed, patting the empty space for her to come join him.

“Cal,” she said nervously, “We need to talk”

His face fell instantly. “Okay,” he said lowly, sliding back to the middle of the bed.

“What’s wrong beautiful?” he asked.

“I think you know Calum, how long are you going to try and keep this up?”

He narrowed his eyes, “What are you talking about y/n?”

She rolled her eyes biting her bottom lip, “I saw your text Cal, from when you were asleep this morning, I know you remember things.. things about us..”

He didn’t speak for a moment, he wouldn’t even look at her..

“How long were you planning on keeping up the act Calum?” she asked, voice coming off strong.

“How long were you going to pretend you didn’t break up with me?” he asked right back sterenly.

She moved to sink into one of the chairs before looking up at him, “Honestly, I don’t know .. I guess maybe until you remembered on your own .. so I wouldn’t have to do it again.. just because we arent together anymore doesn’t mean I don’t care about you Cal..I was a nervous wreck when I found out you got hurt.”  

“And what if I never remembered y/n? Would you have stayed with me?”

She looked at her hands, “No Cal,” she shook her head. “things could never be the same.”

He exhaled deeply, “I thought maybe this was my shot y/n, that maybe I had a chance to keep you, to start over.”

“I.. I’m sorry Calum,” she looked away from him, she knew what she was about to say would crush him, “I.. I don’t love you anymore Cal, not like that at least.”

He squeezed his eyes shut, “FUCK..” he let out, “This is all my fucking fault.”

“Theres something else Cal, I have to tell you something else.. something that may make you hate me.” she said hesitantly.

He opened his eyes, “I could never hate you,” he said shaking his head.

“You might,” she said, biting her bottem lip, “I kissd Luke.. I kissed Luke a lot.. the past couple days ..something happened between us .. I can’t explain it.”

She examined his face carefully as he processed what she was saying, he was angry at first he yelled at her, “I’m in here all messed up and you’re off hooking up with my best mate? What the hell is wrong with you y/n?”

She felt her emotions getting the best of her, but did her best not to cry, “I’m sorry Cal, I know he’s your best friend.. I’m so sorry but I can’t help the way I feel about him.”

After sitting in silence for what felt like forever, Calums face softened before he finally spoke, “He’ll treat you better then I ever could..” he mumbled.

She wasn’t sure if she heard him correctly.

“I knew he’s always had a thing for you” Calum confirmed, “Where is he?” he asked.

“Outside.. waiting..” she told him, “he wants to talk to you too..”

“I won’t lie that I’m fucking pissed,” he snapped again, “but at the same time.. I know he’ll be good to you .. hes a good guy .. and I wan’t you to be happy y/n.. but this sucks and if you two are going to be together I can’t be cool with it .. not right away .. It’s going to take a lot of getting used to.” he swallowed hard, “I’m still pissed at myself for hurting you, for losing you.”

“I don’t know what to say Calum .. I guess .. thank you.. I guess.” She ran her teeth along her bottem lip.

“Don’t thank me..” he shook his head.. “Just go get that asshole.”

Luke walked into the room, “Hey man,” he said weakly, looking anywhere but at his best friend. 

She looked back and forth between the two of them and Calum laughed. The last thing she expected was for Calum to laugh. 

“You’re the last person I expected to steal my girl,” Calum chuckled sarcastically, “You’re a fucker, you know that?” 

Luke just watched him speechless. 

The corner of Cal’s mouth turned up into a half smile rolling his eyes, “Just don’t fuck this up,” he warned Luke, “and stay the fuck out of my sight for a while.” 

“We’re still mates?” Luke asked “You’re cool with this?” 

“No,” Calum told him immediately, “I’m fucking pissed at you.. but I guess I’ll get over it,” he looked over at her, “y/n deserves a guy like you.” 

.:Masterlist:.

The ending of this was a fucking pain in the ass to write so like sorry if its shitty but yeah… thanks for reading as always… as long as one person takes a second to read what I write I’m happy … working on a request from a while ago to post in a couple hours .. might be smutty ;) feel free to drop anything in my ASK BOX

Its been 47 days since you left, I’m not counting anymore. Sure, my heart still pounds that tiny bit faster when I see you, my eyes linger on your face longer than they should, and thats okay.
You broke down a thousand walls when you walked out, ripped my heart into jigsaw pieces and set my lungs on fire, I don’t know what you expect but I have always been so much more than what you saw in me.

I saw the world in you, but you will never be anything more, than an inkblot on my page, a story only worth reminding myself about when someone better comes along.
You were merely a spec of dust in my galaxy, 222 pages of my life, and thats okay.
I am an entire book, A thousand thunderstorms rolled into one, I am a natural disaster, built to take on more than whiny boys, whose eyes resemble oceans, and freckles resemble constellations.
You, are just a pretty face.

You provided a service, filled with shitty half assed excuses on why I wasn’t worthy of your time.
Maybe you should have worn a watch, taken notice of what you had, realised your time wasn’t so special after all.

I wasted the last 42 days of my life on a cliche, the idea that I needed you around, when I have never needed anyone who does not need me.
I have never needed anyone who doesn’t care enough to stick around after the fallout.
I have never needed you.
You were something I wanted, something I thought I was lucky enough to get, but god, I could never, have been so wrong about someone.
The hopeless romantic side of my brain kicked in, and you became this character, someone I fell in love with, but all you were was a disappointment, a shitty one liner, a half written symphony.

I spent the last 5 days realising you are everything wrong with a breakup, heck, you were wrong with our relationship too. You are promising to be “friends” and a “soon” that never comes. You’re an “I’ll miss you” but not enough to do anything about it, you’re a promise to “be there” despite the fact you don’t know where there ever was.
You’re a pretty face, a character I can easily erase.
I have spent 42 days wishing you would come back, and maybe all of that time I knew you never would, but in the past 5, hell, maybe even in the past 47, I have learnt more about you, then I ever did, in the 222 days I spent with you.
And I sure as hell, do not like the person that you have become.
If that person is you at all.

—  269 days ago, if they told me it was going to end up like this, I sure as hell would not have invested myself in a storybook character.
As fate would have it.

It´s been about twelve years since Hiyori last saw Yato. Twelve years since he cut ties with her. With tears in his eyes he explained that it was all for her sake so she could finally start to live a normal life.
What he didn´t know back then was that their ties could never be cut.

Hiyori remembered everything about him, Yukine and the far shore.
At the time Yato and she parted ways Hiyori was already pregnant with a baby girl that grew up knowing nothing about her father. 

So I decided to start writing this multi chapter fanfiction. I´ll try to update as often as possible! 

Read on AO3 !!

Chapter 1 - Days gone by

Words:  1417

Characters:


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IM5 Preference : Broken Relationship - Song Based

Cole - What If by Jason Derulo

Don’t know what tomorrow brings,

But I’m still hoping,

That you are the one for me.

I smiled brightly, as Cole went on about how the boys teased him about forgetting the dance. “They said I was daydreaming about you.” Cole added. A smile crept on my face as I continued to eat dinner. “Were you?” I questioned. “Maybe,” He mumbled shyly.

I giggled slightly, “Focus on work, not me.” Cole just smiled. “But you’re my world,” He smirked. I shook my head, smiling. We ate comfortably, but Cole’s smile slowly turned into a frown.

“Babe, what’s wrong?” I asked curiously. “Nothing, I was just thinking.” He responded, but I could tell it was a lie. “About?” You nudged him in the shoulder. “Just that, we only have two choices.” He said blandly.

“What are you talking about?” You smiled, he was acting very serious. “With us. We’re either going to get married or breakup.” He stated. My smile fell. “That’s true.” I answered hesitantly. 

The rest of dinner was silent. I didn’t know what to say, and I could tell neither did he. I made my way to bed, getting under the covers, pondering what Cole had said.

“Would you want too?” Cole asked from the hall. “Want to what?” I muttered. “Get married.” Cole said bluntly, as if it were nothing. “Marriage is a big deal Cole.” I replied. “Not really, it’s just a piece of paper.” He shrugged.I was shocked. Cole was usually a hopeless romantic,but now he was being inconsiderate.

“A piece of paper that vows you together with someone for life? A piece of paper that tells the world that you’ve met the person that you want to live with until the day you die. A piece of paper that promises the two to care for each other, love each other, protect each other, no matter what argument, what circumstance, what problem comes in their way. Cole it is not just a piece of paper.” You argued.

His face turned pale white. “I never thought of it that way.” He hung his head down. ‘Do you want to get married, Cole?“ I asked, anticipating his answer. "I don’t know.” He paused. My eyes looked down at the floor, holding back tears. “But, I do know who I want to spend the rest of my life with.” He added, climbing into the bed next to me.

“We only have two choices,” I whispered, laying my head against his chest. “I know we’ll make the right one.” Cole responds, kissing me softly on the forehead, drifting off to sleep.

Dana - Deuces by Chris Brown ft Tyga

I know you mad but so what,

I wish you best of luck.

Now I’m gonna throw them deuces up.

“I can’t believe you.” I screamed, pushing Dana away from me. “I was drunk, it didn’t mean anything.” Dana argued, but I didn’t believe. For the past couple months, our relationship had been breaking, and their was no fixing it.

Fame had gone to Dana’s head, and he had turned into some cocky monster I didn’t even recognize. He was always hungover, and if he wasn’t, he was about to be.

“You kissed her, and they have it on video! You were shoving your tongue down her throat, and it didn’t mean anything?” I was holding in sobs. He didn’t reply, scoffing as he rolled his eyes.

“I’m not dealing with this anymore.” I pushed him aside, sprinting into your bedroom, packing your suitcase. “What do you think you’re doing now?” Dana growled, standing in the doorway. “Leaving.” I mumbled, quickly grabbing everything of mine.“You threaten that every week, you’re not going anywhere.” He chuckled to himself.

“No Dana, I’m leaving for real this time. You just don’t understand. I cant sit here, defending you, saying your some wonderful person, when your not! Your a monster, and I’m not letting you leech of me anymore. I need to leave before you hurt me more, or worse yourself.” I screamed, tears streaming down my face.

Silence. I continued throwing things violently into my bag. “Please, please don’t leave.” He begged softly.“I-I can’t function without you.” He whimpered, choking up as if he were to cry.

“You never needed me, Dana. You used me.” I replied coldly, placing your final clothes in my bag. He grabbed my arm roughly, “I always have. I just always knew I was going to lose you, but now. I can’t lose you now.” Fear was in eyes, he was scared.

“Dana, let me go.” I ordered, trying not to look at him. “Please, I’ll change. I’ll do anything.” He begged, down on his knees. I pulled my arm away quickly, zipping up my bag, and rushing to the door.

“What about the ring?” He asked as I placed my hand on the doorknob. I looked down at the engagement ring on my finger. “Please, don’t go.” He whispered one last time. I slowly pulled it of my finger, placing it down on the  table next to me. 

“Goodbye, Dana.” You said firmly, closing the door behind as one last tear fell.

Will - She Looks So Perfect - 5SOS

If I showed up with a plane ticket,

And a shiny diamond ring with your name on it

Would you wanna run away too?

Will and I were cuddled up on the couch, watching his favorite cartoon, Spongebob. I wasn’t very into it, but Will seemed to be enjoying it. “Spongebob can travel anywhere in the world, and always be happy. Isn’t that amazing?” Will asked. I just nodded, smiling at his interest.

“He had such an optimistic look on the world, it’s as if nothing can hurt him.” Will added. “Will, I think you’re taking this a bit too far.” I joked. “It’s true though.” He grunted. I could tell he was being serious.

“I wish life were like that. If you showed people your positivity, you could conquer anything,” He acknowledged. I sat up, looking down at him. “Will, is something wrong?” I asked, concerned.

“Why does he hate me?” He asked. “Will, what are you talking about?” I asked, completely confused now. “Your dad, he hates me. With a passion.” Will grumbled. I looked down with a sigh.

“He’s just protective.” I replied, shrugging my shoulders. “He thinks I’m unreliable. That the music business is terrible. He even told me that you deserved better than me.” Will added, looking hurt. 

“Will, I don’t want better than you. There is no better than you.” I explained, trying to calm him down. I could see a mixture of anger and sadness in his eyes. “No matter what I do, I’ll never be good enough, for you, for him, for anybody." 

"Will, that’s a lie. Do you know why I love you? Because you’re you. You never let anything get you down, because of your optimism.” I smiled, hugging him tightly.

“All I want to do is travel the world and make you happy. I would fly you anywhere you wanted to, just to see you smile.” Will added, making my cheeks blush.

“Why don’t you then?” I asked. He smiled brightly, “Wouldn’t your parents wonder where you’ve gone?” He asked. "As long as I’m with you, I don’t care.“ I smiled, kissing his lips softly as we both fell back onto the couch.

David - She Ain’t You by Chris Brown

I think I better let her go

Can’t leave you alone,

Every day that I’m with her, all I want is you

I walked into the restaurant, looking around for David. "Over here!” I heard his voice yell, standing up from his booth, waving his arms in the air. “Hey,” I smiled, heading toward him. “Haven’t seen you in a while.” He smiled, pulling me into a hug.

The hug was long, longer than it should have been, but I didn’t mind. I missed the smell of his cologne, and the touch of his skin. “It has,” I smiled, pulling away and sitting down. “How have you been?’ He asked. 

"I’ve been alright, I finally got settled down in a small apartment near here. I got a new job too. How about you?” He smiled, shrugging his shoulders. “I’ve been okay. The bands going strong, we’re going on tour again.” He mentioned. I wanted to roll my eyes, but just nodded.

David and I were complicated. We never officially dated, we just had flings., but they were prolonged flings. It was more romantic than friends with benefits, but less complicated than an actual exclusive relationship. Although we cared deeply about each other, our long distance relationship ruined everything. Mistrust, lies, secrets, everything. We just decided to go our separate ways.

“Sounds fun.” I smiled falsely, trying to be happy for him. “So, hows Becca?” I asked shyly. Becca was his girlfriend, and he wasn’t very shy about her. Every magazine had at least one picture of the two, but he never looked happy. 

“She’s fine. She’s really happy.” He nodded, not making eye contact with me. “David, why did you call me here?” I asked forcefully. He stayed quiet, staring at his menu. “ I think I’ll have steak.” He mumbled to himself. “David, answer me.” I ordered, but once again, he ignored me completely. “David, just tell me why.” I begged, but he wouldn’t even look at me.

Frustrated, I grabbed my bag, and stood up to leave. “Wait,” he shouted, grabbing my wrist tightly, pulling me back to him. “I just wanted, no needed, to talk to you.” He replied, motioning for me to sit back down.

“Becca, she’s a great girl,” He started, I scoffed to myself, but continued to listen. “But she’s not you.” He stared at me deeply. “David, I can’t. We can’t.” I sighed, looking away from him.

“I’m not asking for you to walk with me down the aisle, but I just needed for you to know. Becca, she just want’s fame. She and I will never have anything like we did. I know, we both wanted our space, but I had to tell you that, I love you, and I am still in love with you.” He blurted out. I choked, as if there was a rock in my throat.

“I need time.” I breathed out. He looked up at me for a while, but just nodded. “I should be going, I have work tomorrow.” I lied, needing an excuse to leave. “I’ll see you soon then?” David asked.

“Hopefully.” I smiled softly, he let out a little smirk but quickly composed himself. “And David, I missed you too.” I added, quickly turning on my heel, leaving David to sit alone in his own shock.

Gabe - Shot For Me by Drake

The way you walk, thats me.

The way you talk, thats me.

The way you got your hair up did you forget that’s me?

“It’s been a while.” Gabe mumbled, sitting down at the bar next to me. I didn’t even want to answer him, all it brought up was bad memories.

Gabe and I, we were inseparable at first. I gave him 3 good years of my life, but after a while, we turned into trouble. He stayed out late, not coming home until the next morning. I always accused him of cheating, even when I had no evidence. We argued 24/7, and he scared me. He turned into a different person when he was angry.

After a while, we just broke it off. We moved away from each other, starting over. We lost contact with each other, but never completely. I still his number on my phone, I still had pictures of him on there, I just couldn’t bring myself to delete them.

“It has.” I stuttered, my eyes burning from holding back tears. “I see your with someone.” He noted. I looked over at my current boyfriend, Jack. He was on the other side of the bar, some woman draped around his shoulder, but I really didn’t care. I never really cared what he did.

“Yeah, he’s nice.” I shrugged. I didn’t want to lie to Gabe, but I didn’t want to tell the truth either. Ever since we split, everything had been hard for me. I was dating a complete asshole, I started drinking heavily, and I was just lonely all the time.

When I was bored, I would think about how Gabe and I would run around the house, calling each other Catwoman and Batwoman. Sometimes, it would bring tears to my eyes, the memories.

“I see you still like that drink.” He added, pointing to my drink. “Oh yeah, you always had good taste.” I complimented. He was always showing me different things, and I always fell in love wit them. “I guess it just stuck.”

He nodded. “I miss you.” He sighed. A part of me just wanted to hug him, screaming I miss you too, but I couldn’t do it. I just stayed silent, stirring my drink. I could feel him just waiting, but gave up, storming off. “I miss you too.” I whispered to myself, a tear falling down my cheek and into my drink.

~

I got lazy on Will’s dont judge me.

I really like these, I’m probably going to do more of them. Kay byeee!

Requests are available here !

anonymous asked:

Please give me any headcannons about Ronan as an Exy player and Adam as his boyfriend

ok i have had this sitting in my inbox for days because i didnt know where to start. i have aus of aus of that au. its crazy. i have alternate versions of every scene. here goes a tiny fragment of it …… never hesitate to ask for more. alSO I HAD SO MUCH TROUBLE STAYING ON TRACK wtf

  • PSU is recruiting six new foxes and ronan is kevin’s pick because he’s fucking good and he plays like he needs to take a personal revenge against the game + he’s an orphan with a record so he’s fox material (how the fuck did this kid even get to stay in the team he never set a foot in class ????? ‘i dont care i want him on my court’)
  • they went to henrietta to get him but if you want it on another post ask for it because it could escalate quickly
  • he rooms with matt and aaron. his first day, no one is expecting him but he comes in with a duffel bag over his shoulder an no hair, smelling faintly of oil, looking angry, eyes the empty bed, throw his shit on it and leaves again
  • aaron rolls his eyes like,,, serioUSLY another problematic one
  • matt is smiling because new friend and he makes him think of seth
  • if you want one with the first time he meets each of the foxes send me an ask because you asked me to focus on adam so i nEED to control myself
  • anyway! he’s relentless at practice and he works hard. kevin is satisfied (he doesnt tell ronan though bc compliments are against kevin’s religion)
  • he’s been in a few fights bc of people being smartasses but mostly he just wants to be left alone and he doesnt really bond with anyone
  • three weeks in and he still has never said anything personal apart from ‘fuck off you shitstick’ and a few niceties with matt on a good day. also he nodded respectfully at andrew’s car
  • all of the other new foxes are slowly letting their barriers down and becoming a part of the team one fight at a time, but ronan’s just… constant. not making an effort to fit in, in a way that would make everyone think he had a home waiting for him somewhere and being a fox wasn’t the main thing in his life (tssss)
  • he practices, doesn’t talk to anyone in the changing rooms, barely exchanges nods with aaron and is civil but unpersonal with everyone else
  • a month in, on a sunday morning he unexpectedly sees renee at church. they smile at eachother but thats all, respecting the other’s weekly moment of privacy
  • it all goes downhill from there because ronan starts to realize that even though he has his secured lifelong squad, maybe the foxes he’s about to spend 5 years with are worth getting along with (kidding, adam threatened him with no more skype sex/nudes until he started being nicer with his teammates)
  • nicky is absolutely crazy about ronan’s car and begs him to take him for a drive. ronan says no a million time until he’s starting to throw a punch at him to shut nicky up and neil is smoothly pulling nicky out of harms way without a word bc he can #relate to the kind of reaction nicky provokes
  • allison and ronan start street racing!!!!! and its the only form of dialogue they ever have. theyll just text eachother something like ‘race?’ or ‘streets?’ and silently flood the quiet street at night
  • a crazy ass fuck amount of betting develops on his ass because cOME ON the guy is a mistery and his file didnt say anything about him being antisocial and fucking weird wtf he was supposed to be just another rebel antisystem kid not a silent bald entity???
  • they even ask andrew to rile him up to see him react but the smol puppy couldnt care less and would rather kiss his nothing
  • ronan who started off thinking they were the college sports team version of aglionby student council boys => shallow and too mainstream for him is realizing theres more to them and some of them can be kinda fun but by now he doesnt know how te get closer to them
  • meanwhile ADAM is taking smart classes in his ivy league school and the threesome are having a morally questionable roadtrip. ronan still hates phones but he may do an exception at least 5 times a week for these assholes
  • in this au lets consider opal can take care of herself back at the barns???? in which case he’s 24/7 on facetime w her dont lie to urself and no one ever knows where he disappears when actually he’s just checking in on his daughter, nerd
  • anyway. everyone thinks he’s a tragic sob story and he’s got no one thats why he’s so quiet and closed off so the team takes him out to colombia to get him a lil drunk and see what’s up with this bitch (allison), make sure he’s not a danger to the team (andrew), make sure he’s really straight (nicky)
  • he totally insults everyone but he’s in his car on his way by 5pm, punk
  • ofc they dont have problems making him drink….him getting drunk actually takes a lot longer than expected tho
  • anyway theyre drunk and half the team is dancing and then nicky casually asks ronan to join and ronan says ‘yeah’ ??????
  • he dances ????? tHOSE HIPS!
  • renee tells him a joke in his ear and he laughs ?;!
  • you have to know maybe he would burn cities for adam’s smile but the world would willingly sacrifice itself by fire for ronan’s laugh
  • everyone is :o
  • anyway after a while they go to get another drink and allison/nicky/two newbies are scanning the crowd for people to make out with
  • nicky (still trying to be subtle) : ‘ronan that girl over there is SO checking you out’
  • ronan : *snorts* not interested
  • nicky : *dramatic eye roll* oh pLEASE, dont tell me you dont swing either
  • ronan : *quirked eyebrow* oh believe me i do
  • thats it he goes on dancing, so frustrating because nicky still doesnt know!!!
  • from that night on theyre slightly closer but ronan rarely shares anything about back home. they dont know if he has any friends so they assume he doesnt because he’s a fox and they slowly start accepting him in
  • he did disappear for three whole days once but well,,, whtever
  • then thanksgiving weekend happens
  • they have a game on friday afternoon (idk man im not american how does it even work) & since its the upperclassmen’s last year they decided to have a fox thanksgiving at abby’s
  • the game happens, they win, everyone is happy and most of the foxes are on the parking lot going back to their car
  • ronan was held back by wymack who needed to talk abt something
  • nicky screams
  • because,,, leaning against the side of the black bmw there is a boy which 1) whO IS HE HE SO PRETTY 2) why is he against lynch’s car 3) wtf he’s gonna get killed
  • so of course its only his civic duty to protect a fellow citizen when he goes up to this boy ….. he just wants to warn him whose car he’s leaning against
  • ‘hey there. my name is nicky, im with the foxes, hm, whatcha doing here …? cuz this is kind of our friend’s car and hm he really cares about it so…’ while using his pretty man face and making weird gestures in the direction of the car
  • the boy stays silent for like, three lives before saying ‘you’re a friend of ronan? nice to meet ya, im adam’
  • everyone who of course stayed behind to listen is now ??????? who is this adam ? why did they never hear about this pretty boy ? is he just a fan or somthg? ? also is this an aCCENT
  • awkward silence. no one knows what to do. flies are rubbing their hands together. adam is still pretty.
  • renee moves forward. ‘hello adam. we’re ronan’s teammates, who r you?”
  • adam smiles ‘im adam’ he repeats uselessly i swear to god this bitch is useless
  • another awkward silence
  • and then ronan lynch first of his name gets out on the parking lot, looking very angry but no more than usual, walking towards his car without noticing that everyone but a few newsbies is huddled around it
  • when he looks up his face turns even angrier (was that possible???) because what the actual fu–
  • when renee turned around to face him she moved a little and now he can see A Boy Leaning Against His Car
  • you have to imagine ronan lynch’s face at that moment it is a pure source of emotions, shock, confusion, joy, more confusion, self-consciousness, happiness, a poor try at indifference
  • he coughs ‘hm. h-hi, i thought you hm. wasnt i supposed to meet you tomorrow?’
  • ‘thought we could leave tonight and drive home instead of flying’ says tHE bOY
  • and okay this is a key word here home? they have a home in common? is this adam family? but it doesnt look like it and they dont look like eachother and dont have the same vibe at all besides ronan never mentionned any family apart the brothers nicky knows to not be called adam bc he’s checked
  • also there is tENSION between these two you can feel it in the air
  • ronan : ‘can yall fuck off or would you like to climb in the back as well ?’, charming as always
  • the team backs off and they start going to their cars when they realize ronan’s okay but they go suspiciously slow and silently so they can hear/see whats happening
  • ronan and adam r staring at eachother and those nerds cant help but grin at eachother, how gross. they literally cant look eachother in the eye without grinning
  • they havn’t seen eachother irl in a month which :(((
  • adam : ‘nice game.’
  • ronan : ‘i know,’ before kissing him senseless and hugging him at the same time and omg HE HAS MISSED HIS BOYFRIEND SO MUCH LET HIM LIVE
  • nicky is screaming and dropped his bag
  • aaron and kevin are rolling their eyes
  • everyone else is gaping or grinning
  • they make out a bit but then they get in the car because privacy and they have magical threesomes and dreamed up daughters to discuss
  • they were supposd to fly home on their own the day after for thanksgiving, turns out adam thought maybe they’d like to have a roadtrip together instead. also he said matthew and opal sent him a snapchat they’ve already started cooking so they better hit the road fast
  • have you seen ronan lynch’s smile in that moment? probabaly not if you’re still breathing
  • they stop on they way to buy gifts for their daughter
  • allison and nicky receive a picture of ronan, opal, matthew and blue fighting in the hay taken by adam ‘dont tell him but you know he has a soft side’
Step Bro... Fuck Buddy...or Love?

Originally posted by poppytint


For the ones who haven’t read previous chapters yet … Just click the links below

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Genre: Smut ( NSFW ) ( Not in this chapter but I ll make up to it with next chapter so don’t hate me) 

Members: JungKook & Jimin & Reader

Word Count : 1483


JungKook’s POV

I know the truth is all different… She is with Jimin and that drives me insane.

Without thinking I am calling her again… For the hundredth time maybe… She doesn’t pick up. The night is restless for me as I cannot stop thinking of what might happen between them. Why do I feel like this? I was the one that told her to keep it just sexual and a secret… Thats how I started this but now why do I feel like this?

I call her again and somehow she picks up. Well at least I think its her but I’m wrong.

“Hello…”

It is Jimin. I try to keep calm as I ask for Kitten.

“Uhh… Dude… By the number of your calls I can see that you are the one who got her upset”

Like I need to know that. I roll my eyes.

“I have to talk to her”

Jimin’s voice changes

“We are tired and she is sleeping now. Look I don’t know what happened between you two but she is not acting her usualself… “

We… Did he say… We ? I can no longer listen to him. She slept with Jimin. She let someone else to touch her, to feel her.

I simply hang up as I cannot stand to hear anymore.

It is obvious that I should let her go on the other hand I cannot help thinking about it.

Did she moan his name like she did mine? Did she look at him in the same way? Did she let him to take full control over her body?

The most painful question is did he make her feel the same way or better?

This cannot go on like this… I need to face her. By a few calls I learn where Jimin lives. It is far from here but I do not care. I grab my jacket and already on my way.

572… There it is… The green building which looks old but in good condition. I climb the ladder quickly and ring the bell but they are not home. While I am thinking of what to do they show up.

She is smiling as she has some ice cream in her hand. The thing that she is wearing… Probably one of Jimin’s cardigans. Jimin tugs her hair behind ear. They look like a couple and it is painful to watch. I uncomfortably take a step right then they notice me.

Kitten freezes, stops walking and directly looks into my eyes. Her eyes… They are so deep that I can see love, anger, pain together

“JungKook what are you doing here?”

Jimin rolls eyes as he hysterically laughs

“UnFuckingBelievable”

I shoot a glare at him as I grab her by the arm.

“We need to talk Kitten”

She protests and refuses to walk with me.

“Do not call me Kitten”

Jimin interferes as he yanks her other arm and his voice is protective.

“Let go of her”

……….

Just as I wake up I see Jimin watching me with a smile on his face.

“Morning babygirl”

I strecth as my body is aching a little because of our little action last night. It frustrating that I still wonder what JungKook is doing.

Is he with that girl now? Maybe he brought her home…He didn’t even care that I saw them. Just as I am about to get lost in my thoughts Jimin asks

“Thinking about someone?”

I deny, shaking my head but Jimin does not buy it at all.

“Tchh… Look at this baby who thinks that she can fool me… That someone you have been thinking about actually called”

As I am in utter schock I literally scream.

“What ! Dont tell me that you talked to him”

Jimin smiles, caressing my cheek.

“I did because he called a thousand times and the vibration of the phone drove me insane. Wanna talk about what happened with JungKook ? Thats his name right? ”

I have no idea if I should. All the things I am going through is too much but it is also too awkward to talk about.

“Jimin after last night I don’t think it is a good idea… I know I used to tell you about everything but…I do not want to talk about him right now””

Then Jimin does not give me a chance to say anything more.

“Ok… No question about that bastard… Let’s go out and eat something, shall we?”

I refuse but he does not give up. He pats me on the head

“I will buy you ice cream too but only if you eat something for breakfast”

My eyes are narrowed.

“Jimin… I am not a five year old kid”

He giggles as he nuzzles my hair.

“No baby you are definetly not… You are hot”

I slap his arm before he goes to look for my dress.

I wouldn’t feel shy with JungKook if it were him. I shake my head as Jimin is back with my dress. I tell him to turn around even though I know it is stupid. Jimin does not object and waits as I get dressed.  

We go out to decide what to eat. We both agree on pancakes after a long round of rock,paper, scissors. The place is small but clean. We sit over the small table and our hot delicious pancakes are well served. After I feel full I give the last one to Jimin whom happily accepts. On our way back home he stops to buy ice cream.

“Hey you don’t need to do that”

Jimin smiles as he hands met he ice cream.

“I promised right?”

We walk back to home as he is telling me some really embaressing memories of his.

There he is… JungKook is right in front of me. Having no idea why he came all the way I ask.

“JungKook what are you doing here?”

Still standing next to me Jimin gives out a crazy laugh

“UnFuckingBelievable”

I lightly elbow him to make him stop. JungKook’s glare is so obvious as he literally shoot fires from his eyes. However he grabs me by the arm

“We need to talk Kitten”

Kitten? He still calls me like that? After doing such a thing with Han Ra? I pull my arm back.

“Do not call me Kitten”

Right then Jimin interferes as he yanks my other arm.

“Let go of her”

JungKook looks me in the eye.

“I have done it all to forget about you but I can’t let you go”

Those words make me stop. I look into his eyes and see how pure they are. I know JungKook well enough to understand when he talks through his heart.

Jimin grabs my arm again.

“Do not listen to him”

But I stop him and JungKook goes on.

“Hit me, slap me in the face… Do whatever you want because I deserved it. While watching you get ready for the party I was dying inside… Then I heard you were going with him. I wanted to stop you but how could I… You are not my girlfriend Kitten… We shouldn’t be together… Thats what I convinced myself so I have done the easiest thing… Drunk till I couldn’t feel anything at all. When I was with her I was still thinking of you… I didn’t know it until then but I… I love you Kitten… Even if you hate me …”

However I spent so much time with JungKook it is first time that I see him this way. Before I realize tears begin to flow from my cheeks.

“Seeing you like that… Touching her… Like you did to me… It felt like I was nothing.”

JungKook holds me in his arms and I hit his chest till I get tired. Right then his lips find mine and I give in.  As JungKook breaks the kiss I sigh

“This is still imposibble… You know”

JungKook shakes his head

“I don’t give a fuck if they are getting married… “

Jimin who keps quiet until then speaks up.

“Wait… Getting married… Who? Your parents? I mean you two…”

I silently nod to confirm as Jimin pulls me to his side.

“Are you effin serious ?! You were sleeping with a guy who is going be your step brother”

I almost beg him.

“Please Jimin… Don’t judge me… I mean…”

Jimin reassuringly puts his hand over my cheek.

“I won’t… But don’t tell me that you are in love with that asshole who has the guts to sleep with some other girl…”

I press my lips together and take a look at JungKook who is watching me. Am I in love with him… My heart knows that I am but my mind screams that it won’t go anywhere… And I know my answer is going to change everything.

Would Jimin be on my side if I tell him that I love JungKook?

What is going to happen if I choose JungKook?

My head gets all blurry with thoughts as I answer…

@hobijana @noir0neko @batmaniskpopaf @angelic-kook-trash