that's a thing apparently

things i have in common with jensen ackles:

  • both of us shit at pretending we aren’t 5093290409349403% here for accents
  • shared passion for referring to misha as dmitri
  • cant keep it together when misha says anything even remotely funny
  • i too, would reach like 8000ft across another human to touch misha collins
  • willing to forgo all sanitary concerns to lick fluids off a table with misha
  • 2/2 would cancel autographs to have lunch with misha
  • its ok jen, mish is the funniest thing thats ever happened to me too
  • both literal cockles trash apparently??? ??

so my mom works at a vets office and today some noodle brought in a turkey that had been, like, injured by another turkey or some shit. and anyway they were doing routine stuff and they needed to take its temperature, and the lady my mom was working with was like “man i can’t find this turkey’s butthole, where is the turkey’s butthole???’ (or i guess cloaca, thats a thing turkeys have right, informally called a butthole by vet techs apparently) like the feathers are too thick and this lady cant find the turkeys asshole/vagina/mystery bird hole

like shes been combing through the turkeys feathers searching fruitlessly for its asshole for a WHILE now

so my mom, being the practical sort of person that she is, just squats real low behind the turkey and blows really hard on its ass and all of the fathers fluff out of the way like she’s moses and the turkeys ass is the red sea and, lo and fucking behold, the turkey’s butthole was revealed to the public eye

tl;dr my mom is chief turkey butthole locator

So I’m nearly finished Dream Drop Distance and all I can say is I didn’t expect that it’d shamelessly rip off the plot of Mariah Carey’s Magnum Opus, Dreamlover

This game is much more romantic than I was expecting, I especially liked when the two songs combined to make a perfect harmony and save the day, which Mickey Mouse literally pointed out represented two souls that complete one another. Just in case it wasn’t obvious enough. And just to clarify, yes he was talking about Sora and Riku.

This game has just dispensed with the notion of subtext and is battering me over the head with how Sora and Riku’s souls have entwined in a perfect duet, and still there are people like ~no homo~ :’D

my dream wedding is a huge bear picking me up and throwing me off a cliff and then i land in a pool of sharks and i jump on the back of a beautiful giant whale shark and then we go underwater and swim with turtles and then I go to sleep and I wake up and Barbie is talking 2 me and then I wake up again and I’m back at the wedding but I’m marrying the huge bear this time and they have a beautiful white veil and tiara on and then I’m happy

trying to actually start to read dinah lance stuff is pretty much the worst, bc the internet is helpful but not helpful. 

I found this list w/ a reading order, but most are from the 60s and so like how important is reading something from 60 years ago??? but then I stumbled to the newer stuff and it’ll give you a list like batgirl or birds of prey or ga/bc & fine and dandy, but then it’ll recommend batman #31 (random example) & how do you expect me to read one random issue where idk what’s going on

i ended up dl’ing basically anything that I’ve seen people talk about & the stuff I hadn’t I still could find so I just did it anyway. oh & new 52 green arrow bc I’m willing to give it a shot. I’m going read new 52 black canary & they aren’t related, but my brain auto puts my babies together so I have to read both. idk

& before you yell at me bc dl’ing is baaaaad. I dl first, read it, bc I’m a nerd and now now now, then I go back through and collect old issues bc a lot of this stuff is really hard to find. 

this has been a long ramble after 4 hours of sleep.

every time i open my mouth i’m being ‘dramatic’ or ‘emotional’, and when i decide the conversation is over rather than continue to listen to the accusations and be laughed at, ‘how dare i pull such an attitude’, and then i’m ‘dreaming’ and ‘crazy’ when i call out the problem. then guilt is attempted, even though none of the examples brought up have anything to do with what i have a problem with.

so in the end, i’m a terrible person who’s just hysterical and making everyone else upset, why can’t i just relax and be normal?

i am so fucking done right now.