that was a terrible pun batter

Guess he is a "jack of all trades"

So we are playing 5e home brew when the party was getting battered by some mephits

DM(me)- your paladin has just had her insides ripped out by one of these flying mud creatures. Bard, it’s your turn.

Bard - I cast healing word on the paladin (his girlfriend ooc)

*rolls*

Me - paladin, you are healed by the bard for 8 points

Paladin - *gasps for breath and comes to*

Sorcerer - great, you made her orgasm… Not at the table bard!

Bard - what can I say? I guess I’m a cunning linguist!