that wanted another one without me in it

To this day, I am still confused as to how Hirst could bring Harald Finehair in, have his introduction centered around Aslaug, have them have that conversationa about his Princess and NOT think “huh, Aslaug should be Harald’s Princess?”

Like, I’m being serious rn and it’s not just about me wanting Aslaug to have a good storyline (which… okay was that honestly so much to ask for) it genuinely would have been better for the plot as a whole. For one, Harald and Halfdan really had nothing to do in the plot in s4a, this would have given them more relevance without needing a many scenes of set up. For another it would have explained why Harald doesn’t choose to attack Kattegat while Ragnar was missing but instead waited until Lagertha was Queen (if you still insist on killing Aslaug).

Also there are a lot of parallels between Erik BloodAxe and Ivar so imagine how lulzy it would be if they made Aslaug the mother of Erik BloodAxe.

badpearlasrepressednerd  asked:

Ok, mine is Pearl. She cares for her loved ones, she's intelligent and methodical. I like that she's passionate about things she does. I like how she's a great mother figure for Steven. I like how she can move forward without Rose, she can move on. And above all, I like how she was able to be her own person, and she tried hard to learn a thousand things so as not to be just another pearl. She teaches us that you can be you and not what others want you to be. She's Pearlfect.

I’ve got lots of Pearl fans following me, it seems! Pearl is a really cool lady, and I agree with many of the things people are saying about her. She’s a really complex, fun character.

Originally posted by greyannis

anonymous asked:

Yeah, I was gonna get him to use a condom but I wanted a back up too just in case it broke or something. He said my mood swings on birth control would be worth it (but he doesn't have to deal with them because I never see him, he lives 2 hours away) so I don't know if he's gonna be ok with having sex without it but then I don't think he was planning on wearing a condom but I'm wasn't gonna do it without one so I'll mention that next time I talk to him lol. Thank you!

Don’t let a guy tell you your moon swings are worth it just so he can have sex with you, that is 100% bullshit- i wouldn’t sleep with someone who told me something like that.

Also if he doesn’t want to wear a condom that is also bullshit and another reason to not sleep with him

You want some real legitimate advice about mental health? Stop being mean to yourself.

Like, when you wanna say mean shit about yourself either internally or externally, work to learn how to step back a moment and remind yourself that what you are doing is a form of self-harm and not a fair or legitimate judgement on you as a person, and furthermore is not productive to your survival or well-being.

Even if you fuck something up, you can resolve to do better in the future, you can tell yourself that you’re going to make this a learning experience, and even if you’ve made the same mistake 50 times already, telling yourself you’ll get it right someday if you just keep trying will always do you better than calling yourself an idiot and beating yourself up for not being able to get it right.

Take it from me, a lot of mental health shit is a product of your environment and personal history, and therefore you really don’t have the control over it that you need to get by without others’ help, but one thing you can have some control over is whether you’re going to be a friend to yourself or just another enemy, and if you want to survive, you’ve gotta strive to be in your own corner as best you can.

anonymous asked:

Do you have any kind of process for picking colors for the backgrounds? They all seem to have really nice uniformity, and I would love to read up on how colors like that are picked (or if it's more intuition based). I do remember you mentioning that you also had help from another color lead before, so I was wondering how much of that they help out vs the colors you chose?

hey, thanks so much! this might get a lil long (as it always does!!) so bear with me.

firstly i want to say, there’s no right or wrong way to pick colors. every artist has their own palette they prefer and i think it’s super delightful to spend time developing your own special sense of color. so even though i’m explaining things in a “this is how you do it” sort of way, it’s not the only way! just my way. the best method to develop your own sense of color is to look at a LOT of art, look at a LOT of the world around you, and practice practice pratice.

at this point in my life i pick colors intuitively just because i think it’s something i’m naturally tuned into, and i’ve been doing it for a few years, so i don’t actively plan my palettes. but here are some things that i think about as i pick colors.

firstly, i want to go over hue, value, and saturation. i’m sure everyone knows these intuitively but i want to explain them in words. hue, value and saturation are what make up a color, and decide how colors differ from each other.

hue: what color the color actually is. red, purple, green, yellow, and everything in between.

value: how light or dark a color is. if you’re painting traditionally, adding more white or more black to a color lowers or raises its value.

saturation: how “pure” the color is vs how much neutral tone is in it.

here’s an example of all three:


this comes into play because a big mistake i see beginners make is that they pick a “just” color, and by that i mean they pick “just blue” or “just yellow”. imagine buying a set of oil paints and only using paints straight from the tube without ever mixing. it would be impossible! so i try to avoid picking “just” colors, except as for a complementary color (more on that in a bit). here are some variations of a red, for example.

so, the biggest thing for me when i pick colors is that i want them all to be friends. i want them all to have something in common so that they get along. i usually lose control of a painting when my colors feel to different from one another. so, i will usually start a painting with one color i know for sure i want, and “subordinate” other colors to it, meaning every other color i pick has to look good with that color. as to how you figure out what looks good and what doesn’t, that just takes time and lots of observation to build a personal opinion :) here’s an example from one of my paintings. in this case, the main color is the trees.

and here’s another from rick & morty, the main color is the sky this time.

now that that’s out of the way, i’m going to give you the Actual Cheat Sheet for color palettes. in color theory, there are 8 basic color schemes that are generally pleasing to look at. here they are.

i usually use an analogous palette or monochrome palette out of preference. the two examples above more or less fall into those categories. however, i also like to use split complementary because the complimentary color adds a LOT of contrast and visual interest. it’s great to use if you have a specific thing in a painting you want to draw attention to. here’s an example:

it doesn’t always have to be a perfect split complementary, just one color that differs from the “family” of colors that take up a majority of the piece. 

now! you might be wondering when’s the right time to subordinate a color, or where to put it, or how much of it to use, etc. and the answer is: CONTRAST. there is always visual interest in things that are different. i was rifling through my school notes and found these great types of contrast when working with color.

value: things that are light vs things that are dark.

hue: two colors that look different. I.E. yellow vs blue.

saturation: things that are saturated vs things that are desaturated.

proportion: note the example above. a majority of the painting is orange, so the green stands out because there is proportionally less of it.

temperature: things that are warm vs things that are cool.

complementary: red vs green, blue vs orange, yellow vs purple. when in doubt, these colors always contrast against each other because they have nothing in common (there is no red in green, etc).

simultaneous: this is a little advanced and i’m bad at explaining it, so please read up on it here. 

a super helpful exercise is to look at your favorite illustrations, paintings, photographs, designs, etc and assess which one of the 8 color schemes (linked above) it has, and which types (can be more than one) of contrast it has. we did this in school and it REALLY helped me look at color better. here’s part of the assignment i did, the artist is annette marnat.

so! that’s pretty much how i think about color and how i pick my colors! i hope it was somewhat helpful! there’s so so so so much about color theory i can’t even begin to cover, i highly urge you to watch some videos and read some books and articles to further your study. a great starting place would be this series of videos. these are made by my teacher Richard Keyes, i think he had a dvd or something. everything i’ve talked about so far i learned from him and he is an absolute expert in color. these videos are invaluable. if you take anything away from this post, let it be to watch these videos hahaha.

to answer your question about my color leads, every painting was a collaborative effort between the three of us, and sometimes other painters too. it was a very hands-on crew, so i can’t say any of the r&m bgs i did are 100% “mine”. however, i think my personal color sense is waaaay different than jason or phil’s, which made the process very interesting because we usually had 3 very different opinions hahaa. you can check out their work here and here to see what things they brought to the table in relation to my own contributions.

thank you for the ask! again, i hope this was helpful :)

While we’re on the subject of tumblr’s shortcomings as a fandom platform, I want to say one more thing. I’ve been thinking lately about how it’s really important to remember that fandom isn’t just on tumblr, but on AO3 as well. One angle that I don’t see people talking about a lot with regard to commenting on fic is that it’s another level of interaction that I don’t think fandom can live without–not just because it fuels writers, but because it can fuel readers too. 

Over the course of my fandom life, I’ve gradually worked my way up to leaving more and more detailed comments (not necessarily always longer, but definitely more specific) and let me tell you–it’s incredibly rewarding. Just recently, I left a comment that prompted a writer to share a lot more about what they were thinking while writing the fic and to give me a rec for a fic with a similar theme to the one they wrote. Sometimes writers will reply to comments by going into more detail about the headcanons they have for characters or explaining more backstory for a part of the fic that I mentioned liking. I’ve had people follow me here on tumblr after I commented on one of their fics on AO3 (and as a writer, I’ve followed people who have commented on my fic too–if I can find them here), and from that, sometimes new friendships arise.

What I’m trying to say is that the importance of comments as an aspect of fandom interactions can’t be overstated. It’s not just about stroking a writer’s ego. You can get things out of it too, whether it be a new headcanon to think about, an insight into the creative process, or even a new friend. Being specific about the parts of fic you like can give writers the confidence to write more things in the same vein or to write more period. Back in the LJ days, fic and personal posts were all mixed in together, so it was easier to have those kinds of interactions, but now that those worlds are split, I think it’s even more important to remember why commenting is important and what it can do for fandom as a whole.

So next time you’re leaving a comment, I challenge you to view it not as “paying your dues” for reading the story, but as an opportunity to interact with the person behind it. You don’t have to be long-winded. Tell them what your favorite part of it was. Pick out something that was unique about it and ask about their inspiration. Talk about how it made you feel or what it reminds you of. You won’t regret it. 

I’m fine, alright, it’s just been rough. “


Originally a vent sketch featuring my favorite out of the Sanders Sides personas that became something more.

Since Part 2 came out while I was working on this one, may draw another for it soon. Either way, hope you enjoy!

Please do not repost or edit this.
Or use without permission.

variety.com
‘Supergirl,’ ‘Arrow’ Producer Suspended Amid Sexual Harassment Allegations by Warner Bros.
Warner Bros. TV Group has launched an investigation into allegations of inappropriate behavior by Andrew Kreisberg, an executive producer on the CW shows “Arrow,” “Supergirl,” “The Flash” and “DC’s…
By Maureen Ryan

Warner Bros. TV Group has launched an investigation into allegations of inappropriate behavior by Andrew Kreisberg, an executive producer on the CW shows “Arrow,” “Supergirl,” “The Flash” and “DC’s Legends of Tomorrow,” Variety has learned. Kreisberg, who has been suspended by the studio, has engaged in a pattern of alleged sexual harassment and inappropriate physical contact over a period of years, according to 15 women and four men who have worked with him.

“We have recently been made aware of allegations of misconduct against Andrew Kreisberg,” said Warner Bros. TV Group in a statement to Variety. “We have suspended Mr. Kreisberg and are conducting an internal investigation. We take all allegations of misconduct extremely seriously, and are committed to creating a safe working environment for our employees and everyone involved in our productions.”

Kreisberg strongly denies the allegations in this story.

None of the 19 sources for this story wanted to be named for fear of retaliation. Many of the women are current or former employees in a range of positions on those shows, and they cited fear of retaliation from either Warner Bros., the studio that makes those dramas, or from the companies and individuals associated with those programs.

Keep reading

Drarry Headcanons
  • Draco pining for Harry since sixth year
  • Like he just needs someone to save him, to care for him, who better than the savior of the entire wizarding world?
  • Three years after the war finally ends, and Harry’s Auror work leads him to St. Mungo’s where Draco is a healer
  • And when did Draco get so attractive ???
  • Harry finds himself going back several times a week with increasingly frail excuses to see him
  • “Er, I got a paper cut and I forgot the healing charm.”
  • “You do realize bandages exist, right Potter?”
  • Finally he goes “fuck it, I didn’t die to keep these feelings to myself” and asks him on a date
  • This goes on for a while, and things are super good for both of them
  • They finally begin to feel normal again
  • Harry eventually wants to come out to his family (the Weasleys, Andromeda, Teddy who’s far too young to understand but he’ll be damned if he keeps a single secret from that child)
  • Draco wants to come out too, but his family is so torn apart
  • So they do it together, hand-in-hand, at a Weasley family gathering and when they finally convince Andy and Narcissa to meet
  • They move in together a few months later and have a guest bedroom for Merlin-knows who will stay with them
  • The longer they stay together, the more time Andy leaves Teddy alone with them, secretly testing them as parents
  • That room eventually becomes Teddy’s room, full of warmth and color and so, so many pictures of Remus and Tonks
  • And they heal together, mending the scars they both hide beneath the surface
  • Draco eventually decides he wants his Dark Mark hidden, as instead of a reminder of his past mistakes, it becomes a trigger for horrible anxiety, so he goes and gets the constellations of his family tattooed over it
  • Harry gets a tattoo of Canis Major, complete with twinkling Sirius star on the same day
  • He would end up with a full moon, a rack of antlers, and a lily flower on his body as well
  • They take even bigger roles in Teddy’s life, as a cousin to Draco and godson to Harry
  • Teddy loves the zoo, and they have weekly trips there, but once its raining so they go to the animal shelter instead
  • Draco falls in love with every single cat, but they immediately make Harry sneeze
  • Teddy becomes attached to a large black dog, but to Harry it looks a bit too much like another one
  • Draco literally refuses to leave without rescuing at least one animal
  • They eventually decide to adopt two sphynx cats they find on the muggle internet because they’re hypoallergenic and many people consider them to be ugly, but they fit so well into their strange family
  • Draco thinks they look absolutely regal and wants to name them after constellations, but Harry’s having none of it
  • A few months later, Harry stops in the middle of a Quidditch game they’re playing with Teddy
  • “Draco, will you marry me?”
  • It’s so random that Draco nearly falls off his broom in shock, but he says yes an instant later, and the game continues
  • After the wedding, in which Teddy is the most adorable ring bearer to grace the earth, his hair matching their colors of emerald and gold, Andromeda approaches them with the idea of the two of them adopting Teddy as their own
  • It’d be so much easier for the two of them to keep up with him and raise him into modern society, and she just wants to step back and be a grandmother more than a parent
  • When Draco enthusiastically agrees to it, Harry can’t help but break down in tears
  • After living his whole life without a family, after everyone he’s lost, and after all he’s fought for, he can finally just live and be happy
  • Harry and Draco Malfoy-Potter and their Son Teddy Remus Lupin along with their two cats, Dobby and Colin, grow old together because for fuck’s sake these three deserve to be happy
you left anyway. i wasn’t into you at the beginning. you know that. but eventually you made me look at you with new eyes. and i fell. i was so young and innocent, my heart was big and my soul was pure. you touched me with dirty hands like i was just another victim. how could you do that for someone who would die for you? how could you change my mind about how life is beautiful and leave with no remorse? you made me fall just so you could break another heart. you were never intentioned to stay but you made me believe i was the one you wanted to spend your life with. and i did. i believed in you. i believed in every single word that came out of your mouth. i didn’t know people could lie so easily without feeling guilty. but i know now. and i honestly hope you really fall in love for once. and i hope they break your heart in one million pieces so you can never put it together. i hope you lose your purpose in life and never find it again. you turned me into this heartless monster and i want you to suffer like i did. because you didn’t care. you left anyway.
2

Requested by:

Annon:
Hi I don’t know if you can do a bill Skarsgard imagine like bill brothers come to visit you two and you an bill have a little fun at night😉😉and in the morning his brothers tease you both about how loud you are and bill was defending you and yeah ejeje thank you!! “Smut” please thanks!       

@harleysgothamonline
Hello, desperate fangirl here! Could you possibly do an imagine where the reader and Bill get into a huge argument just having a screaming match and they are both screaming and crying and she’s hitting his chest out of anger, and then they both make up by kissing passionately and cuddling. It’s okay if you want to pass on that idea, I promise I won’t be butt hurt lol.

Warnings: Language, smut.

A/N: I hope you don’t mind that I mixed two request, I’ve changed the roles just a little. This is my firs time writting smut and I really sucks… sorry about that, I‘ve tried my best, sorry for my horrible english.

Pairing: Bill Skarsgard x Reader

Title: “You moan like a princess”

__________

“Stop yelling, Y/N, my siblings are in the next room” Bill whispered trying to stay calm despite his girlfriend still yelling at him without reason

“I DON’T CARE THEY’RE IN HERE BILL” She yelled furiously, feeling her heart beating faster against her chest  

“Why are you so angry, Y/N? WHAT DID I DO NOW?” he asked without understanding, twining his fingers in his hair, starting to feel desperate.  

“I SAW YOUR CELLPHONE” She confessed with tears in her eyes “I SAW YOUR MESSAGES WITH THAT SLUT, BILL!”  She felt the bitter tears begin to slide down her red cheeks. Bill looked at her, he was furious, his girlfriend had been snooping on his cellphone without permission

“WHY DID YOU CHECK MY PHONE, Y/N?” He asked angrily, starting to yell too

“OH MY GOD! I JUST FOUND YOUR MESSAGES WITH ANOTHER WOMAN AND YOU…  Oh God , I CAN’T BELIEVE IT, BILL!” She tried to look at him, but tears clouded her vision and she felt how her heart break into a thousand pieces. Bill stayed quiet, looking at who he believed was the love of his life, crying furiously in front of him and he felt like the worst human being.

“I’m sorry” He whispered with a broken voice, approaching her, trying to hold her, but she walks away

“YES, YOU SHOULD SORRY” She kept yelling, not with anger but sadness

“Y/N, it’s not what you think, nothing ever happened with her” He tried to hug her desperately and she hits him on the chest

“I’m not stupid, Bill” She hits him again trying to get away from him, but he was holding her tight

“I know you’re not, Y/N, please” He begged with tears in his eyes “I love you”

“No, you don’t” She sobbed as he embraced her

“Hey…” He whispered and takes her chin with his fingertips “Look at me, my love” Y/N turned to see him, Oh God! She loved his green eyes “You have to believe me, I would never do anything to hurt you” He said more relaxed

“But I saw the messages, Bill, you can’t deny it!”

He sighed heavily.

The truth was that in the last few months, Bill had been planning his marriage proposal to Y/N, and his best friend had agreed to help him with it, the messages really could be misunderstood because they just talked about meeting in certain places to talk about it

“She was helping me to plan my marriage proposal” he confesses in distress “Now it’s all ruined, but I don’t care because I don’t want to lose you Y/N” he walked to the dressing table and take the fake flowers from the clay vase, he reached into the vase and pulled out a small black box.

He went back to Y/N and showed it to her “It’s not as I had planned it, actually Gustaf and Alex were here to help me with it but… damn it! You’d to be a psycho girlfriend, dear!” Y/N looked at him in puzzlement, with one hand covering her mouth, feeling the stupidest woman on the planet, she was trembling and couldn’t control it, Bill rested his forehead on hers; she could feel his warm breath and breathe his favorite cologne that she loved it so much, chamomile and mint, she looked into his eyes “be my wife” he whispered opening the little box

“Oh my god”

“is it a yes?”

“Yes” She whispered almost inaudibly.

Bill took the ring and put it on her finger. He kissed her,  holding her tightly by the waist, but it wasn’t a romantic kiss, it was one full of desire. It wouldn’t be the first time they ended up having sex after an argument.

He was much taller than her, but Y/N manages to take a small leap by wrapping her legs around his waist; Bill walked with her and they lie down on the bed while still kissing

“Do you want to go out to dinner? Or do you prefer to stay and kiss to see how this continues?” He said between kissed. Y/N looked at him and responded with another kiss even more passionate than the previous one.

Her hands had begun to play with the buttons of his shirt, unbuttoning them one by one until completely removed. She loved to see him like that, she adored his milky skin and his Adam’s apple moving every time is swallowed, she loved his dilated pupils giving a special touch to the green of his eyes, and his velvet lips, Dear God.

Bill had taken her dress off along with her dark bra, his kisses had begun to run down her neck and shoulder making her gasp slightly, his velvet lips begging to fiddle with her left nipple making her squirm under him and panting wildly, his right hand low up brushing the thin fabric of her underwear, feeling as she began to get wet just for him, her thighs trembled.  

Y/N tried to control her hips, but she was desperate to feel some friction, so she took his hand and guide him inside her panties, he began to touch her gently rubbing her clit, she struggled not to moan to loudly, after all Bill’s brothers were in the next room. He slides his fingers inside her and she twisted her neck letting exposed to him, he couldn’t miss the opportunity to kiss it and suck it slightly causing it to form a small hickey that would disappear soon.

He stopped touching her “What happened?” She asked confused “Why did you stop?”

“It seems you aren’t enjoying what I’m doing” He replied, whispering in her ear. His warm breath crashing against her skin, excited her even more.

“Your brothers are in the other room, Bill”

“I thought you didn’t mind, sweetheart” He tested her, lifted one eyebrow playfully as he licked her earlobe, making her moan softly.

“Bill, please” she whispered

“I want you to scream my name” He slip another finger inside her and felt her scratching his arm.

“Bill” she whispered breathlessly as he began to move his fingers inside her, she moved her hips and moan against his neck “more…” She begged him

“I can’t hear you, sweetie”

“Fuck me, Bill” She begged, biting his jaw gently and arranging to unbuckle his belt and remove his trousers, touching his prominent bulge, he groaned at her touch and without thinking twice she moved her hand inside his boxers taking his erection.

“Shee-it, Y/N” He settled between her legs and gently slide inside her as he kissed her hardly, he lets out a small groan as she scratched his back in response, he started thrusting faster and harder

In a quick movement, Y/N was on top of him, riding his cock and scratching his chest with every movement she made, Bill held her by the waist to gain the most stimulation with each stroke. He loved her, he loved her waist, her messy hair and her breasts moving to the beat of both.

She began to feel how the heat grew inside her and her calves began to tingle, as it happened every time she was about to reach an orgasm, she also felt how Bill’s muscles began to tense beneath her… “Y/N” He groaned as he clutched her breasts and took her neck to draw her closer to him and kiss her with passion finally thrusting their both into a climax.

__

Y/N and Bill were in the kitchen making breakfast, they heard footsteps and laughter in the hall, Gustaf and Alex appeared and sat on the kitchen counter in front of both

“Good morning guys” Y/N greeted them while turning a pancake with the spatula

“Good morning, Y/N” replied Gustaf “How about last night guys?” he asked as he serve a cup of coffee, Y/N and Bill cross glances and laugh “I mean… we heard you arguing”

“And other stuff” Alex joked

Y/N felt her cheeks begin to turn pink and laughed nervously, she knew these two too well and they wouldn’t hesitate to joke “I don’t know which one is noisier, if my brother or his girlfriend” mocked Alex and Bill turned to see him angrily

Gustaf let out a loud laugh “Bill you moan like a princess”

Y/N laughed and watched Bill’s jaw began to tighten

“I mean… Dad would be very disappointed in you, brother” Alex stood up to reach a mug

Y/N laughed and walked over to Bill “Let him alone guys” She said, wrapping her arms around his neck “I love your moans baby, don’t mind them” she confessed giving him a kiss on his lips and gigglin.

requests are open! (x)

MASTERLIST

Day One Hundred and Twelve

-I handed an adorable girl, scarcely one year old, a sticker. She was so overwhelmed by this gesture that she attempted to pay back my kindness in the only equivalent way she could imagine: she attempted to hand me the sticker back.

-A manager stopped by my lane on his way out of the store to discuss a podcast that we were both listening to. The sweet elderly woman I was ringing up asked if we were discussing a television show, and wanted all of the details. I then had to explain to this kind women, well into her seventies, how a radio drama about a brave man, a spiritually-flexible dwarf, and a Tex-Mex wizard made for good entertainment.

-A young girl demanded that her family walk through the grocery section so that she could feed her starving doll. I was grateful to see them oblige and take care of their daughter to the same extent that their daughter took care of her young ward.

-A church group left dozens of Easter eggs around the store, stuffed into merchandise and behind displays, each holding an advertisement for their upcoming service. Their use of our store for their own promotion without our consent was one thing, their leaving their litter throughout our store for us to clean up was another, but the final straw to me is that they did not even leave us chocolate for our troubles. It’s what Jesus would have wanted.

-As with most bad nights in softlines, I have made for myself a friend. A stray smiley stress toy and a stray single Spider-Man glove have combined to make a snuggly blue burrito of a friend. I have christened my son Leonardo and he has salvaged my night.

Hey guys! I’ve told you before that I’m a writer so this is a hella long post because it’s track-by-track. Unapologetically so. Hope you guys enjoy x 

TRACK 1: “… READY FOR IT?

 This song is a battlecry. The thumping bass brings to mind the heavy thud of wolves paws as they race towards their prey, seeking the trail left by a girl who used to leave her heart open and on her sleeve, ready to be snatched at any moment in a snap of their jaws. But no more. From the moment she clears her throat, we learn this battle will be on Taylor’s terms. It is her fight to win.

This is the first love song she’s released and had complete artistic ownership of in three years. It is no coincidence then that there’s reference to the tortured passions of Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton. They were a couple hopelessly and dangerously in love with many scars carved on their hearts by the other’s knife. This reference is a throwaway to the long list of ex lovers the girl who bathes in diamonds has had but also a reference to the flickers of hope Taylor feels for longevity no matter what with Joe. Their road may be complicated at times but they will get  there because the game is hers. The constant question of ready for it and in response baby let the games begin is so obviously a call of warning to Joe for what lies ahead but perhaps more subtly it is the call of Taylor’s inner voices and heart to her razor sharp self awareness. Is she ready for the games to begin? Is she ready to open her heart and give Joe a chance to be a better man?

TRACK 2: “END GAME” ft. Ed Sheeran & Future:

This song starts off with Taylor’s declaration that she wants to find a forever. It sounds sincere, gentle, wearied, the tone of the too often heartbroken. But then it shifts, it’s like the rose coloured glasses have come off and she’s reminded of her reputation. Then it’s all tongue in cheek sarcastic satire to keep the smile in place so that we don’t see how much it hurts. She has to weigh up every interaction in the context of her reputation. The addition of Ed & Future speaks volumes; one is a time trusted friend who has finally found a bright love of his own but that was not without heartbreak and the other gives her an edgier attitude that makes her self awareness all the more powerful.

There has been a further loss of innocence in this sharpening of her self awareness, gone are the wistful days of “say you’ll remember me”, that’s all I want. Now it’s all “I don’t wanna touch you, I don’t wanna be just another ex love you don’t wanna see.” She can see the fall right from the start but this time she opts out and says unless I’m your end game… because I don’t want to pick up any more pieces of my broken heart.

Also: Shoutout to Ed for his Cherry inspired verse. It made me feel many emotions too. SWEERAN THRIVES.

TRACK 3: “I DID SOMETHING BAD.”

The girl with the long list of ex lovers is back. However with the casually explicit twist, this narrative seems layered with perceptions and recognition of self-worth, “If a man talks shit, I owe him nothing.” This is drip-feeding the media exactly what they want, she’s stoking the fire herself. But in feeding the fire herself, she’s sending the burning embers back at them. Did you really think the girl who you used as an international rod for slut shaming would stay quiet forever? Nope. She doesn’t care if you burn her like a witch at the stake because she’s already done it. She’s burnt away all of the misplaced guilt and is now revelling in how good they felt in the moment. In fact, watch out she’s blazing with all the fire of a phoenix reborn and you might just get turned to ash.

TRACK 4: “DON’T BLAME ME.”

This & “I Did Something Bad” sound like sister tracks. The girl who jetsets around the world collecting men isn’t quite finished with her tale yet. She reminds us that defining her relationships by their headlines and paparazzi shots is a foolish move because those things are  one-dimensional. Taylor believes in love and this is her way of reminding us that there was love in every escapade of her heart up until now, at least at some point. She’s talking about the heady rushes head spinning intoxication of first glances and hands on skin and it doesn’t matter what the media says about the way she handles relationships because they forget love and that makes you crazy. Maybe in their minds the drug she refers to is not a singular identity but a collective “baby” and to them love will always be something she “uses”. But the heart wants what it wants and Taylor knows that so it doesn’t really matter.

TRACK 5: “DELICATE.”

This is the kind of song that happens when you cut the cord that is the boy crazy perception of yourself. You step back into the shadows and disappear so that they can’t find you. You close your heart, lock your doors and rebuild. And then he shows up. This is a cautionary songpp because Taylor can obviously feel sparks but… she’s just started to rebuild and if they find out the wolf hunt begins again. With delicate disbelieving vocals, we see Taylor start to realise that he can’t possibly want to gain anything from her reputation because it’s so bad… The wheels turn in her head. I imagine the realisation, “Wait so he must like me for me?” With the beat drop comes hope. Details are slowly given and then he stays. He doesn’t run so Taylor gives him pieces of herself; confessions thoughts and then her brain catches up with her mouth and the wheels come to a grinding halt: Her inner monologue screams it was too much too fast. We’ve all been there. It’s too delicate. No going back now. It’ll break and I’ll be left alone. Maybe one day I’ll find someone who doesn’t walk away, one day too.

TRACK 6: “LOOK WHAT YOU MADE ME DO.”

The world tore a girl to shreds, made her play the fool on tilted stages. She retreated and rebuilt. Now the fool is dead. From here on out, she only trusts her army. With high heeled boots, red lips and words as sharp as daggers, she’s cutting herself a path. She is taking no prisoners and she’s accompanied by a savage snake because she and her army will always be better at the game. When she’s finished hunting down your asses, she’ll sit back on her throne with a high pitched giggle and say, “oh look what you made me do.”

TRACK 7:  “SO IT GOES…”

When people are watching, you have to be careful. Cover your tracks. Taylor doesn’t leave her heart open or on display anymore. But then they leave. The door shuts. You lock it with a key and the crashing chemistry you’ve been trying to deny slams into your ribs, knocking the breath out of you. It’s stolen kisses, careless touches, reckless chasing of the high. Body language is a fluency all its own. But a quick reminder before you unlock the door and venture out again; wash the lipstick off your face. *clears throat* you got a little caught up in the moment and you don’t want to blow your cover!

TRACK 8: “GORGEOUS.”

 The childish proclamation of the title to begin this next glimpse into Reputation  is hinting at the satirical inner monologue that this song is , reminiscent of the times you write your crush’s  last name instead of your own to see how it fits. It’s all giggles and late night phone calls, the kind Taylor most likely had with Abigail where they talked real slow because it was late and their mamas didn’t know (: However, it could also serve as a projection of the runaway daydream that fills Taylor’s mind from that very first night when she stumbles home alone to her cats, of what a possible future might look like (with kids one day) The lazy liquor loosened rhythms of Taylor’s thoughts tell us things she hasn’t admitted fully yet but will soon on nights at 4am staring at her reflection  in the bathroom mirror, telling herself the bravest thing she ever did was run - that this gorgeous  swoonworthy British boy with his careless touches and drawling accent has awakened the possibility of something better. This realisation rattles Taylor as she contemplates the gaps in her current relationship. *cue wistful sighs of frustration and enchantment, set to the dialogue of every teenage movie where the girl thinks the boy is just too good looking, how unfair is that?

TRACK 9: “GETAWAY CAR.”

The thing about any movie that has a getaway car scene is that they inevitably crash…. And that’s exactly what happens here. Except, the carnage is human hearts. She was running. There was a person she crashed into. It gets all blurred and tangled, she thinks she’s free but the thing about those movies is that the thing you ran from in the getaway car catches up to you particularly if there’s a track you can follow. Oceans of distance weren’t enough, darling. You needed to disappear. And I think she realises that  but she tries to pretend innocence and will the sunset closer. Unfortunately  the only real  way to untangle yourself is to disappear crying in the back of a getaway car in the dead of night. Without a word. That must have hurt a lot.

TRACK 10: “KING OF MY HEART.”

This song happens in tandem with Delicate. She’d sworn off love. Joe turned up. The British boy with the heart of gold who made his American queen believe. He made behind closed doors a paradise of rooftop nights. Before she knows it, he is every love story Taylor has ever daydreamed of. The line “is this the end to all the endings” made my heart swell because it’s clear Taylor hopes he’s the one. Please let there be no more heartbreak.

TRACK 11: “DANCING WITH OUR HANDS TIED.”

Dancing is supposed to be a joyous thing and maybe it was in the beginning. You can reassure with every beat. Sometimes your gut instinct shouldn’t be ignored though  because it does raise red flags. The door only needs to be fractionally ajar for the hunters to find a way in and set your paradise aflame. It sometimes doesn’t matter how much you dance to escape the flames, they will catch you. You will get tired. Dancing is a bliss that is euphoria swimmimg through your veins if the beat enters your bloodstream in the right moment; you feel like you could live forever. And in the end no matter how much it might hurt to walk away again, you would still dance for just another kick of that rush.

TRACK 12: “DRESS.”

Taylor’s caught up in the chemical rush. Every syllable drips with lust and the glory of the high when your hearts crash into each other, slamming the breath from between your ribs. It’s hands in hair and I don’t care what they think. It’s seeing the worst (hi bleachella) and still wanting. It’s realising you made mistakes before this and why didn’t you just do this from the beginning because it feels so good now you can’t ever have imagined wanting anything else. But every mistake is a marker in the roadmap and you woke up just in time to find where you needed to be.

TRACK 13: “THIS IS WHY WE CAN’T HAVE NICE THINGS.”

I think everyone’s been in this situation, right? Someone burns you and it hurts but in the fun of a party, you click and connect again and it all starts to feel like water under the bridge. Maybe there was over-reacting happening. You throw them a second chance. Redemption. You’re the nice girl and you make excuses. But then they do it again, maybe it takes a couple of things and suddenly it’s too much. You lock the gate for your own safety. But they still expect you not to care. To flash a smile and forgive. I’m sorry. That’s not happening. You get hurt when I push back. I guess I should forgive you because we both threw stones. But… that would require me to mean it. Whoops, *laughs manaically* I can’t even say it with a straight face!!!

PS: It’s not too obvious I have personal experience with this song is it? Thanks KS x.

TRACK 14: “CALL IT WHAT YOU WANT.”

This song is difficult for me to process because I never thought it would actually happen. I seem to remember somewhere along the way, a couple of years back, Taylor expressing frustration that she couldn’t seem to write happy songs about being in love like Ed Sheeran could. Well, I wish you could go back Taylor and tell yourself what you know now.

This song is a three minute ode to happy love. It’s smiles so wide you might split your face in half at the thought of that person. It’s blushing and shy giggles and bursts of song and twirls and all caps texts from your girls as they collectively lose their minds over how happy you are. This is every love story and fairytale Taylor has ever wanted but the wolves are always waiting, not so easy to outrun. 

Taylor says it herself in the  opening lines. She was done. The castle had crumbled. The bricks left bruises blooming on her exposed skin. People were tearing her down and she was hurting. Her heart had been shattered but so had her soul, again and again, relentlessly. And then she retreated, went silent and rebuilt. What she didn’t count on was love. A man who saw all the bruises and broken pieces and said it’s OK, I can still find the real you under all that. Taylor like so many of us looked in the mirror and saw all the danger for herself and for Joe, tried to push him away, keep him safe. That’s a very noble action but breaking your own heart so it doesn’t hurt as much when you feel like the other shoe is going to drop requires apathy from the other person. And Joe, god bless you, you didn’t let her push you away. You broke down her walls and showed you that starlight love does still exist. You loved her for Taylor. The person. You got her to give love a chance when she swore never again so thank you so much for that. I can’t really express how much that means to all of us. 

 This is an anthem of hope for every person who has ever been broken and is in the process of putting pieces back together. It can be done. We will find love. We will be radiantly happy again. We will be the strongest we’ve ever been. 

PS: *leans over to whisper in Taylor’s ear*

I think you’re finally clean…

TRACK 15: “NEW YEARS DAY.”

Piano on the final track… This is an ode of pure hope and happiness, a fitting final chapter to a remarkable story. Everyone wants the glory of the midnights and the lover who will be in their bloodstream like the party. But what we all hope for is someone who stays long enough to help us clean up the bottles on New Years Day. Someone who makes us feel like the messy unfiltered parts look like a highlight reel. Good times and bad times and all in between. They won’t leave. You found him. Forever.

This album is fucking brilliant Taylor. I love you. Proud x.

@taylorswift @taylornation @brian-mansfield

2 | Jealous

A NIGHT AT HOME | JUNGKOOK VERSION 

WORD COUNT: 5,378

warnings: graphic smut, dirty talk, spanking, oral sex, fingering, rough sex, asphyxiation (choking), ass play, degrading names, dom!jungkook + sub!reader

Originally posted by junghope

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You want some ice for that burn?

Context: Our party came across 2 tunnels in this cave system. One went left one went right. Me and another character (Z) have been antagonizing each other for a while.

Me: *turning down the left tunnel* “ You know what they say: good adventurers go left.”

Z: “Well I’m gonna go right!”

Me (without missing a beat): “And the saying remains true.”

*we had to stop the game for a few minutes while everyone (including the DM) had to regain their composure. Needless to say I’ve never felt more powerful*

Writing Advice, Or: How to Use a Screenplay to Write Your Novel

If you are, like me, someone who:

- gets bogged down in details

- writes fanfiction

- loves characters but struggles with plot

- wants to write a novel but gets easily distracted by TV

Here’s the best piece of writing advice I can give you:

Write a screenplay.

For real. I spent months agonizing over characters, plot, sentences, details… and got nowhere. Okay, maybe not “nowhere,” because I had 100,000 words and the characters told me about who they were, what they wanted, and their relationships with one another. And yet, I was stuck.

So, unfortunately, you have to do the work, presumably first, but still. You have to write in order to figure these things out. You can sit and think about it all you want, but at some point, the characters are going to change things on you, and you just have to roll with it.

I use Celtx, which is a free screenplay writing software that has more features than I could ever use, and which allows its user to simply write, without worrying over formatting. It’s amazing. 

A screenplay allows you to do several things, which is why I’m recommending it:

- gets bogged down in details? No problem. The world you’re creating consists of three things: slugline (where/when), action (who is in the scene and, in very broad strokes, what are they doing - what’s the situation), and dialogue (what they are saying, ONLY. No gestures, movements, walking from this side of the room to that unless it is specifically relevant to the plot). When you break down a scene into these three things, you have the flow of your novel, from one scene to the next, without needing to slam your head into the table every day worrying about details. Because when you do sit down to write it in novel format, you are focusing only on one scene, which you already have set-up.

- writes fanfiction? Awesome. Because you are already able to take a world that is provided and focus exclusively on the characters. When writing a screenplay, the world you’re providing is already there, albeit in scaffolding only. You have the where and some small descriptions… which you can flesh out later, in as much detail as you want, in a novel. One at a time. You already do this, you wonderful fanfic writer. This is what you do.

- loves characters but struggles with plot? Screenwriting is AMAZING for plot because you have to be able to see what is happening, and we are so good at watching television/movies. We already have so much practice with viewing plot in our daily lives that it can seem insurmountable to sit down and come up with one yourself. But when you allow yourself to play, to flow, to write one scene and trust yourself and ask, What happens next? What would I like or expect to see next, if I were watching this right now? You’d be amazed at what you can come up with in a very short amount of time. 

- wants to write a novel but is easily distracted by TV? Boom. Self-loathing problem solved. You’re not watching television, like a passive viewer. You are actively creating television. Actively creating art. You have to delve deep into all those things that make movies or series great… and find out what doesn’t work. Soon enough, you’ll be able to see these issues for yourself, both good and bad, whenever you watch something. It brings your viewership to a higher standard. It actively impacts your critical thinking skills. 

And, in the end, if you come up with an amazing screenplay, you can always try and sell that or get it made first. If that doesn’t work out, retrieve it from the market, and write the novel. 

Or, just write the novel, with your scaffolding - especially if it’s an emotion-heavy plot. Take it with a heavy grain of salt, but the YouTube series “Film Courage” can be very helpful in getting down to business in the screenwriting world. (It can also be very discouraging, if you’re sensitive like me, but knowledge has its price.)

Happy Writing.

Love,

theleafpile

It’s hard to explain the fickleness of the human emotion; one moment you’re on top of the clouds, in another you’re lying on the ocean floor with the weight of the entire water on your chest; sometimes I get so irritated I want to scratch my own skin off, and sometimes I want to set my own house ablaze. There are times I’m crying without reason- my throat double its size from the knot inside, and sometimes I find myself laughing at the air itself. The worst part of it all is that there are no external factors involved, nor any situation; just me and my madness at each other’s throats, sometimes embracing, sometimes making love, and sometimes huddled together in a corner shy from the world.
—  Eliot Knight
About Sleep Paralysis

It’s been so long since the last post regarding my recurrent nightmares and dreams, and I wish I could have continued without writing another post about it but unfortunately last night I had another weird dream plus sleep paralysis in the morning. I want to keep track of every hallucination I’ve experienced here, so, here it goes:

The first time it happened I was 14 years old, my grandma had just passed away and I was very stressed between school and shit going on with my life. I remember one night that I was sleeping and suddenly I woke up, but I couldn’t move. I opened my eyes only to see the darkness of my room and the wall in front of me. I was very scared and couldn’t move a single muscle. After trying everything else, I decided to scream but no sound would come out of my mouth. Then I heard a voice saying repeatedly saying: “Come with me. I’m here. Come with me”. I panicked and I don’t remember anything else, I think I probably passed out until the next day.

After that, at least two times a week my sleep paralysis would get worse. I would wake up in the middle of the night not moving at all. I could hear voices outside my house and inside my bedroom. I remember being so scared of sleeping, not knowing what was going on. Things moved on like that for a while. 

Everything continued like that until the hallucinations became worse. One night, after graduating high school I had some sort of “astral projection” “lucid dreaming” stuff going on. I remember dreaming of this place with high grass and watching two skinny dying horses. After walking trough a train rail I got to be in some sort of cave formed by green trees with giant roots stepping out of the ground. I saw snakes everywhere, tiny and big, in all sort of shapes and colours. I finally caught a snake with my hands and saw in its eyes. Then I heard a voice saying “We’ll see again”. When the dream was over I woke up in my room, and again, couldn’t move. This time I felt something under my bed crawling and heard another time: “We’ll see again, find me” repeatedly. 

The worst attack of sleep paralysis and hallucinations I can remember came after that. Maybe half a year later after that weird dream. My room was dark and a little bit cold (it was autumn I think). At the time, I was depressed (I suffer from depression since I was 15). The last thing I did conscious was getting in my bed and trying to sleep on my back. After a few moments I remember waking up very fast, like, something hit me and I woke up suddenly. My body was not responding. I could see my hands, my knees, my feet but couldn’t move at all. Then I started “moving”; everything was heavier and that’s when I started hallucinating. I tried to move my legs and I could feel them moving, but I couldn’t see the movement of them. Weirdly though, I could move my head a little, I could see my room and my wall. And then it came, I don’t know from where, but, at the end of my bed I saw a pair of hands, with three large, large and skinny fingers. Something crawled from under my bed and started climbing it. It was a weird, dark creature. It was skinny, like, very, very skinny, you could see his ribs and spine. I could see his arms, like sticks, and then I saw his face. Whatever it was, it was very dark, like a profound black, and had a weird face, like an oval. The thing had no mouth, no fur, no hair nor nose, just two yellow eyes. The eyes were round shaped, like two glowing perfect circles. The creature was crawling and making weird noises, like a voice mixed with a scream and nails passing trough a chalk board. After it crawled onto my bed, he started laughing, quietly, like, when you laugh with your mouth closed. I just remember trying to move, and scream, and then I felt his arms touching my legs. I don’t know why but I started thinking in weird stuff and trying to scream in my mind: “i’m not going with you, you’re not real, you’re not real”.  I must have passed out or something, cause I can’t remember anything after all. I woke up in the morning, sweating and very scared. 

After receiving the visit of that thing fro at least two or three times more I decided to draw it on my notebooks with everything I could remember.

This has been going on with me for at least 6 years now, and time after time it’s getting worse. However, I think i’ll continue writing everything here, after all, I know i’m not alone, although sometimes it feels like that…

P.S: Dear @sixpenceee, hope you reblog this, cause I want to find if more people are suffering the exact same thing with the exact same creatures.

Taako is in Neverwinter. He doesn’t know why.

It’s definitely Neverwinter; he’s spent more time here since joining the BoB, he knows what the place looks like. He’s by his favorite boutique. Down the street he can see the bookstore Angus likes to visit, and he knows that two streets over is the florist and a tiny bakery that makes some of the best petit fours he’s ever had. But when he looks around, there’s not a single familiar face in the crowd.

He wanders, but there’s no additional context to go off of - it’s a nice day and he’d be thrilled at the prospect of a day off if he could just remember how the fuck he got here. There was nobody giving him weird looks, so as much as it feels like it, he didn’t just wake up. There’s no indication of magic around him, so it’s probably not an illusion. Maybe it’s some kind of prank? Maybe one of those chucklefucks stuffed him in a bubble and sent him on his way, unaware? If he finds out who’s responsible for this he’s going to bedazzle their entire fucking wardrobe.

Taako pulls out his stone and calls Magnus, because Magnus should be here somewhere. Taako usually can’t take two steps on a planetside day trip without an excitable Magnus trailing along. And if it was a prank it probably wasn’t his idea - this isn’t his style.

Magnus is in Raven’s Roost, and what the fuck.

“Why the fuck are you in Raven’s Roost?” Taako doesn’t notice how hard he’s clutching the stone.

Magnus laughs, the absolute ass. “Was I supposed to visit? You have actually tell me when you want me to come over, pretty sure that’s how it works. This another one of those last-minute family dinners? …am I allowed to bring the dogs this time?”

Visit, like he’s been there a while instead of here. Like he’s there a lot, even though Taako can’t think of one time Magnus has ever been planetside alone. Maybe he is in on the prank, maybe Carey is feeding him lines on the moon base right now.

“My dude, I see you daily whether I want to or not. You didn’t answer my question.”

Magnus laughs a little and it sounds uncomfortable this time. Like he’s not sure where Taako is going with this, like he wants to give the right answer but doesn’t know what Taako is asking for, and Taako doesn’t understand why he feels a sudden, nervous chill of familiarity. “I… live here?”

Definitely a prank, absolutely some kind of joke, that is the truth Taako is sticking to even though Magnus couldn’t lie to save his life and his voice should be cracking with laughter instead of even and sure. He’s kidding. He has to be kidding. “Uh huh, okay. So if you’re not coming back I can start renting out your room on the base, yeah? Taako could use a little extra income.”

There is a silence that Taako doesn’t like for a long moment, and something in Magnus’s voice has changed when he speaks again. “Where are you right now?”

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