I’M FUCKING SHOOK
So picture me, playing some Dark Souls for the very first time, now 20 hours in and happily (…kinda) grinding my way through Blighttown with my faithful character Bepis Jones V. I don’t know most of the mechanics but I’ve got a solid grasp on the controls and some great armor and weaponry, plus a bit of pyromancy.
Along the way, I get how most people get in Blighttown (I’ve heard), and decide I need help. So I decide to do what the game told me to ages ago for the second time: summon an NPC helper.
So, I try to call up my main man Solaire, but instead the summon rock thingy offers me a different NPC with an odd name. I figure it’s probably as good as Solaire, and summon it. I’m greeted with a wizard who immediately starts wrecking shit all over; goddamn, this NPC is broken!
After a few minutes of running into walls, I continue my journey, little wizard NPC friend following along as happy as can be. Occasionally, I wave and beckon to it, jumping for joy as I recklessly run into big bugs and wizard friend saves me. It sometimes bows back; cool AI, I thought. I also sometimes hit and knock it into holes for my amusement. It always gets back out but I have a good laugh.
Finally, as most DS runs go, I fall into a pit. I’m dead, NPC is banished to the shadow realm until I get my humanity back or something, blah blah blah.
AND THEN THE “NPC” SENDS ME A FRIEND REQUEST ON STEAM
I WASTED THIS PERFECTLY NICE GUY’S TIME FOR AN HOUR DOING STUPID SHIT BECAUSE I THOUGHT HE WAS AN NPC
I DID NOT REALIZE DARK SOULS HAD COOPERATIVE MULTIPLAYER