This turned out to be a full review. I write my thoughts in real time so if you have contentions and feel the need to post them read the entire post because I may have addressed your issues near the end. Spoilers. Obviously. And be warned this is pretty anti-Damon and anti-Delena.
1. I am four minutes and eleven seconds into this episode of The Vampire Diaries and Stefan tells Damon, “It’s not your fault. You’re getting a pass. Everyone understands.” And the show thinks it’s being so self-reflexive and smart by making Damon point out that their understanding is generous considering that he nearly killed everyone and stabbed “your pregnant girlfriend in the chest” as if pointing out the lack of consequences makes up for the fact that there is a lack of consequences.
2. So basically, Julian turned Mystic Falls into the set of the Fast and the Furious. OK.
3. More griping between Bonnie and Matt about Damon nearly killing them all. I like how no one has PTSD over the amount of times Damon has almost murdered them (because it’s been more than once).
4. Matt and Bonnie “matching” on match.com and then Bonnie giving Matt advice on his profile picture, like is Bonnie just giving love/sex/relationship advice to everyone now? Also Matt and Bonnie would’ve been much preferable to Bonenzo (at least the way I would’ve written that relationship).
5. So Stefan and Caroline are on the phone while Caroline is setting up for her baby shower and Stefan is taking Damon around the new MF that Julian created (AKA Fast and the Furious: Mystic Falls Style) and Stefan isn’t going to be at the show but tells Caroline that he’ll get Alaric the baby book she made him pick out when he was drunk and then he promises her to stay in one piece and then Damon tells Stefan he’s whipped and I’m like … … if Stefan was whipped, Stefan would BE at the baby shower. Stefan would be reading up on baby books. Like Stefan is minimally engaged in Caroline’s life AT BEST.
6. I’m tired of the show acting like Stefan is completely ineffectual and Damon is the brains of the operation and that if Damon was out of the stone first, then Julian wouldn’t have taken over Mystic Falls when history has show than Damon does nothing but make a situation worse while Stefan knows how to compromise and forge alliances and create delicate peaces. Like STOP IT.
7. Since when did Damon EVER care about Mystic Falls? Him getting angry that Julian took it over makes absolutely no sense; what would make sense is Damon being mad indignant that Julian is the alpha male. Julian who is BASICALLY KLAUS.
8. I love how BOTH of Caroline’s exes are at her baby shower but Stefan isn’t.
9. I swear to God if Damon kills this black man…
10. HE DID. I KNEW IT. THE MOMENT THE BLACK MAN WAS IN THE SHOT I WAS LIKE YEAH HE’S DEAD. I FUCKING KNEW IT.
11. Bonnie is fucking OOC this episode.
12. I think it’s sweet that when Stefan talks about hallucinating his hell he says the only constant was Caroline and then you see him talking to her about him having a nightmare about Damon but the way they’re navigating each other is still very friendly. If this were a couple and Stefan woke up from a nightmare as intense as the one he had was supposed to be, Caroline should be sitting next to him, touching his forehead, stroking his hair, when he goes to get a drink she should be at his back, her arms around him, like physicality is a big part of being in a relationship and they don’t act like they’re in love romantically, they act like they’re the best of friends.
13. It really fucking bothers me that Stefan’s pain is all about Damon.
14. Like even when Stefan throws a glass at the wall thinking Damon’s there and Caroline is yelling “Enough! It’s not real!” if this is the “madly in love” “better than SE” relationship the show says it is, then Caroline should be rushing to Stefan, hands on his face, “look into my eyes, it’s not real” and he should be holding on to those words.
15. And the show is really trying to push how much Stefan needs Caroline and I would honestly buy it if the actions were as passionate as his words or if his delivery was as passionate as what he’s saying. Damon’s ghost is tormenting Stefan so he tries to burn Damon’s actual body and Caroline is there like “you love your brother and I know you’d rather die than let him go” but everything is so calm and so muted, Stefan’s mental disintegration is very quiet and very monotone, Caroline doesn’t even look very concerned about his psychological fracture, like if Stefan was going crazy, MAKE HIM GO CRAZY and if Caroline was the only thing keeping him together, show some conviction. Give me some Peeta and Katniss shit.
16. I didn’t realize I missed Tyler until I saw Tyler.
17. Damon and his “my girl” shit annoys me. Elena is more than just your girl.
18. At least Caroline finally put her hands on Stefan’s face even though that lasted like a second. Fuck. Was that so HARD?
19. I am so sick of hearing how Elena held Damon back from being a monster when he was killing Whitmores while they were together, when he killed Aaron and kidnapped Jeremy and emotionally tortured Katherine while they were in their on again and off again phases. Damon was ALWAYS Damon, the only difference is the show decided to act like he wasn’t when he was with her.
20. Yes, Stefan. Your life WOULD be better if Damon wasn’t in it.
21. Bonnie being all I’m not going to let my friends die and we’ll stop the vampire huntress so they’ll live you mean there’s never a moment when Bonnie is just TIRED? The amount of times she’s DIED for these people, there isn’t a part of her that’s like you know what, I’m taking a break? Even Buffy had her moments of I’m not doing this anymore!
22. I also don’t understand why Bonnie is so pressed about Nora or Mary-Louise whichever heretic she has this weird fixation with for absolutely no reason. I think it’s Nora. I remember the ship name being Bonora.
23. Did the police have a search warrant for Matt’s truck or nah?
24. I’m laughing because they’re playing The Album Leaf during Alaric and Caroline’s moment and when I was a hardass Steroline shipper I used the SAME song in one of my best Steroline vids and I feel some type of way.
25. I’m pissed that Stefan’s job is to make Damon feel better but when the hell has Damon done that for Stefan? When has Stefan really got to unload on Damon and Damon be the shoulder to Stefan’s vulnerability? Like I’m done with how one-sided Defan is.
26. I would be excited about Matt being a sort of antagonist in the ff if he wasn’t also saving Caroline’s life at the same time, like my Matt Donovan would be DARK.
Happy 2017! Enjoy the conclusion of this little Christmas/after New Year fic.
I’m planning to post this on FFn and AO3 on Friday.
Summary: Two women, unlucky in love, decide to swap homes and lives for the holiday season. What happens next is nothing short of a Christmas miracle. Based on the movie of the same name, “The Holiday”.
Rated: M for brief depictions of violence and coarse language. Warnings: same.
A/N: I have this vision of everyone naming their ficlets ‘Stolen’ this week, future asks at the everlarkficquestions blog ‘I’m looking for a drabble called ‘Stolen,’ ‘well, there are 17 of them…’
I’ve always thought of myself as invincible. Strong for my size, tough, intimidating - those are all words I have used to describe myself. And we live in Panem, sleepy little Panem, where everybody knows everybody. The absolute picture of safety.
So when Peeta protested the idea of me walking home from work alone at night along the river pathway, I didn’t take him seriously. I knew nothing was ever going to happen.
He liked to antagonise her, he’d realised over the last few months. Even
when he wasn’t doing it intentionally, he’d always liked the response
she’d had to him - now, it was even better when he kind of knew how
she’d react to certain things. He’d learnt a few things during their
time working at the bakery together. He’d learnt even more over the last
I’ve been walking through the covert for a while, I just want to enjoy the woods. I don’t even care if I’m making noises right now, as I’m not hunting today. Just leaving the house makes me feel better right now.
I’m arriving about 45 minutes later in the woods, without any prey. But well, I didn’t even try.
While I’m strolling through the woods, I notice everything that crosses my path. It hasn’t been raining a lot lately, which means everything is pretty dry, there’s nothing that could have given me a quiet walk at all.
But walking quietly isn’t what I want to achieve today – I just want to put some daylight between Peeta and I.
First, I have to approach the ledge Gale and I used to meet at. Of course, I miss my best friend, he has always been there for me. Even though we lost contact with each other after the rebellion, we could save our relationship, but still, it never happened to be like it used to be. Both of us has changed. There’s nothing left of those lovebirds, who could finish each other’s sentence. Actually, it’s clear, because we just grew too much apart.
I sink down on the rock we used to sit on. But it feels way too big without Gale next to me.
The meadow which you hardly can recognize nowaydays, looks incredibly beautiful by dawn. Even though there’s been a lack of rain, everything is green, other people’s lives keep on living under me. The new medicin factory, still incipient, is part of the view, just like other people’s homes. I hardly recognize my district. Has so much time passed?, I wonder. Everything feels new, but also familiar.
Sunset should be soon, I think. And just as I expected, I get to see an orange, violet sky, passing over me. That’s the color Peeta would approve, I think. It’s his favorite color, he said, he loves it, because it reminds him of me. The color of sunset is just as complicated as I am – he really has to put in full effort if he wants to paint the sunset on a canvas.
He’s right, the color is beautiful. I lose myself to that moment, try to take in everything that could be lost later.
I whistle Rue’s song. As if the mockingjays would have been waiting for it, they repeat the song. I hear the melody, that only has four notes, everywhere, wandering around.
Summer breeze gives my skin a comforting wamrth, brings the smell of fresh grass into my nose. I don’t know what’s differnt today, but I notice things way more carefully today. It’s like my senses had been asleep for years, so they could wake up today, being stronger than ever before.
If there was just a little bit of rain, the drought would vanish quickly, I think. As soon as this thought went through my mind, a raindrop falls down on my nose. I’m pleased, and can’t but laugh cheerfully for a while.
If someone saw me right here, they’d probably think I had lost my mind. Sometimes I think that myself – it can’t be that long until I’ll lose it.
Raindrops fall down, pattering, onto the dry leaves, a new smell fulfills the air that’s surrounding me. Oh, how much I love it. I keep sitting on my stone, let everything around me happen, enjoy my environment. It’s not just a few raindrops anymore, no, it’s raining pitchforks, a sudden thunder shakes the ground violently. I tug my leather jacket closer, but I don’t move.
Why is everything feeling so different lately – but as a reply, I feel a movement in my stomach.
„Hello, little lady, you’re really there. It’s so nice to feel you for the first time“, I say, stroking my belly where I just felt the movement.
Happiness bewets my eyes, it’s the first time I feel my, no, our baby, stirring in me.
My leather jacket is soaked, feels heavy.
„Keep raining“, I demand.
I still don’t move. I feel like the rain washes away part of my past. Every drop erasing one of my sins, every drop makes me feel a little more like a new human, who never committed any crime. I enjoy the rain.
I am unable to tell if it’s rain or tears strolling down my face. I feel free, like never before, like a new human, free from sins, free from old charges and most important: free from the Capitol!
Our baby will be born in a free world, she’ll never have to go through what we had to, I tell myself. It’s not just a dream, it’s a confident hope. I’d do anything to make this hope be real.
I’m overwhelmed by the need to walk home right now, telling Peeta his baby moved. I stand up and go home decisively.
The leaves are soaked, now I am able to walk through the woods quietly again.
Then, I see the first doe this year, I’d call it hunter’s instinct. I insert an arrow silently to the string, but then I get a glimpse of the calf right behind her.
„Oh, so you’re a mommy“, I blurt out and lower the bow.
I could never bring a full-grown doe home all by myself, I think. But it’s not just that what makes me lower the bow. I don’t wanna spill blood today. Not on a day, I finally recognize my freedom, my baby finally shows herself.
I also want this calf to be protected by its mother, living peacefully, in safety. Outdoors, where it’s fully of harmony.
The last sunray just disappeared below the horizon. It’s just now that I notice I’m still walking, but I can catch a glimpse of our house already. Those last few yards feel like an eternity right now.
I’m not going to make it until home, I think involuntarily. What a stupid thought, I tell myself.
I open the door, let bow and arrows drop immediately on the floor and look for my husband. My perfect husband.
I let myself repeat the words in my head, how beautifully it sounds like. We just got married.
I just needed a little space from Peeta today as he is so over-caring, it nearly felt like I’d drown in it. Ever since I told him I’m pregnant, it’s gotten even more than before. He overwhelms me with love, everything he does just proves to me I’d never deserve him.
„You could live a hundred livetimes and still not deserve him, you know?“ Haymitch’s words keep echoing in my head, let my tears seep out painfully.
Those are just words by someone who almost has drunken his whole life. Those are just words that were said during hours, filled with alcohol. But they still hurt me, whenever I remember them, and they make me feel like I can’t breathe. Don’t ask why! Probably because it’s so true? They don’t allow me in any way that I feel loved. Why would I not deserve him? Why am I not entitled to feel loved?
I’m just a woman who loves her husband endlessly. I love him, I love us, I love my life, so what’s stopping me from being happy, I ask myself.
My past that’s just been washed away from me by the rain, I tell myself. For the first time ever, I allow myself to feel happy, to feel loved. I deserved him! Why wouldn’t I?
I pad through the house, still looking for him. He’s in the kitchen, holding a cup of tea in his hand. The house smells like fresh bread that was just taken out of the oven, I see the cheese buns that he just put on the pantry so they cool down.
He opens his blue eyes widely, telling me a little reproachfully: „I thought you were going to see Haymitch. Why are you soaking wet? Are you crazy? You can’t go out like that in your condition. Did you want to catch your death?“
I’m just taken by his beauty, not able to object. I always thought the initial infatuation would vanish after a while, but it never did. I’m more than ever before in love with this man.
He puts his cup on the pantry, walks towards me and removes my wet jacket, lets it drop on the chair. I feel the tears strolling down my face, uncontrollably. My hormones play a desperate game with me that I’d never be able to win.
Peeta looks at me, worried, and asks me carefully while whiping away my tears with his thump. „What happened? I’m sorry for being a little harsh.“
His hands, that are as warm as the loaves of bread from back then, feel so loving familar on my cold cheek. His wonderful voice gets under my skin which gives me goose bumps.
I rediscover my voice, telling him with a tremendous voice, breathlessly: „Our baby has moved.“
I look into his eyes, notice the tears that come up in the corner of his eye. He asks me doubtfully, „She moved?“
Without any reaction to his question, I tell him „I found the perfect name for her. Well, only in case you like it“.
He’s putting his arms around me, pulling me closer. He doesn’t seem to bother about my soaked clothes. He strokes my wet hair with one hand, the other holds me close.
I feel smaller than ever during moments like this, feel like he’s more important than ever. He’s my rock, my partner, fellow in misery. He lets me cry when I need it, and I can just let it happen.
„Now, do you want to hear the name, or not?“ I ask eagerly, while I take in the smell of his shirt that’s full of tears.
“Please, give me a few seconds, I feel so overwhelmed by all my feelings right now”, is all he says. After a little bit, he whispers “Now, tell me.” I tell him “Hope.”.
“Why?” Peeta flopped down on the couch. “Why do I always
fall for the wrong girls?”
Katniss handed him a glass of white liquor, courtesy of
Haymitch. “You didn’t know she was the wrong girl.”
He took a long, hard sip from the glass. “Well, she
definitely wasn’t the right girl.” Sitting back, Peeta let out a sigh. “You
know, I sent her Christmas present to Manhattan to some random address. Some
person is going to open a gift box with a very expensive Swarovski ornament.”
Anonymous Prompt, #62: modern day AU- You fell asleep on my shoulder, but you were too cute so I didn’t want to wake you up (in an airport maybe).
Rated: PG13? For a tiny bit of language. Mostly fluff and OOC!Katniss.
Author’s Note: Thank you JavisTG, once more, for hosting this event, and thank you Anon for the prompt. Thank YOU for reading it, and be aware that I wrote this in less than twelve hours, it’s not even betaread, and to make matters even worse, my internet has been down since Saturday, so I uploaded this from my phone. I hope it’s ok.
Sleepless in Seattle
The sun slants at a funny angle, through the glass wall of Sea-Tac Airport food court, I had painstakingly selected my seat at a small table right against the window, looking down at the airport ramp, because of the way the sun rays fell on it, so inviting and reinvigorating.
No trigger warnings. Kept it short, sweet and light-hearted. Hope somebody enjoys!
“What,” I mutter back to Madge who is bellowing down at me from upstairs. I can only imagine what she wants now. She’s the one planning this trip to the Outer Banks of North Carolina, but I seem to be getting stuck with all the last minute errands that go with it.
I don’t even want to go on this trip. I have too many other things I could be doing with my next-to-last week of summer and it’s called working. Earning money. Getting paid. I don’t have parents paying my way through college or paying for me to go on fun vacations with my friends, so how Madge talked me into going; I’ll never know.
“Katniss,” Madge says as she tumbles down the stairs, stopping short as soon as she sees me. “Wait, are you really wearing that to the beach?
hey can you write a quick drabble of everlark: during the beach kiss, if finnick had not stopped them?
“No one really needs me,” he says, and there’s no self-pity in his voice. It’s true he family doesn’t need him. They will mourn him, as will a handful of friends. But they will get on. Even Haymitch, with the help of a lot of white liquor, will get on. I realize only one person will be damaged beyond repair if Peeta dies. Me.
“I do,” I say. "I need you.“ He looks upset, takes a deep breath as if to begin a long argument, and that’s no good, no good at all, because he’ll start going on about Prim and my mother and everything and I’ll just get confused. So before he can talk, I stop his lips with a kiss.
I feel that thing again. The thing I only felt once before. In the cave last year, when I was trying to get Haymitch to send us food. I kissed Peeta about a thousand times during those Games and after. But there was only one kiss that made me feel something stir deep inside. Only one that made me want more. But my head wound stated bleeding and he made me lie down.
This time there is nothing but us to interrupt us. And after a few attempts, Peeta gives up on talking. The sensation inside me grows warmer and spreads out from my chest, down through my body, out along my arms and lets, to the tips of my being. Instead of satisfying me, the kisses have the opposite effect, of making my need greater. I thought I was something of an expert on hunger, but this is an entirely new kind. (Catching Fire, pgs. 352-353)
I don’t know how or when exactly it happens, but it doesn’t take long before I notice how entwined Peeta and I have become. How close our bodies are to the other. Pulling myself away at this point is impossible. I know the whole of Panem is watching, but for the first time, I don’t care. Perhaps now the Districts will calm down, and there won’t be any fighting, maybe I can win this after all.
It’s Peeta pulling my closer yet, that pulls me back to the present. His kisses have always been so sweet and tender. There was never a doubt in my mind that he would take care of me if we had gotten married. That’s the thing about Peeta, he’s so inherently good. He takes everything in stride, and even when we weren’t talking back at home, he didn’t force me to communicate with him, it was my own confused feelings that kept him at a distance. I’d hurt him. Really hurt him, and seeing him everyday was painful enough, but all of that seems to have washed away now. In light of this revelation.
I do. I need Peeta. I’ve never needed anyone or anything like I need Peeta. He’s defended me, protected me, loved me in spite of myself, loved me despite my muddled and confused feelings. He has never been anything but good. My nightmares were always more manageable when he was there with me. His arms around me, his closeness. Much like the closeness we share now.
The air is crisp and fresh, just as it always is in the fall in District 12. The cool breeze makes the different colored leaves dance and twirl. It’s been a year since the revolution, and Katniss and Peeta have grown together again. There are days the nightmares still plague them and moments where Peeta goes to a dark place, but for the most part, they’ve found their niche with each other.
Haymitch still lives next door in the Victor’s Village, nursing his white liquor as a means to pass the time. He’s acquired geese which keep him busy, and Peeta can see them bustling in their pen outside. He’s approaching the mailbox as part of his daily morning routine. There’s no need to check Katniss’ mailbox as well; she’s been staying with him for several months now. She’s out hunting today, so he brings the pile of mail inside and begins working on some cheese buns.
The morning passes by quietly, and as Peeta finishes up his baking, he sits down to check who they’ve gotten mail from recently. There’s a letter from Annie addressed to both of them. He’ll wait until Katniss returns to open it. An advertisement for some new Capitol show is part of the pile and he tosses it into the trash bin. They do little TV watching anyway. Most evenings are spent working on the memory book or enjoying tea in front of the warm fireplace.
There is one letter, however, that piques Peeta’s interest. Underneath a Capitol return address reads Peeta’s name in scribbled handwriting.