that day at the la county fair

Sick

Summary: You get sick while Shawn is visiting you but you don’t want to ruin the day so you try to hide it. He catches on. 

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My alarm jerks me out of my restless sleep. Before I even open my eyes or turn off my alarm, I immediately have a sinking feeling. I should be excited, I am excited, but I feel terrible. I know I’m sick, and I can’t think of a worse time to feel like this. Today, was supposed to be an amazing day with Shawn. He flew in early this morning, and we already have a whole plan of what we want to do. He’s going to pick me up and we’re going to go to the LA county fair, and then tonight we’re going to Huntington Beach. We’re going to walk on the pier and have dinner then watch the sunset and maybe play in the water if it isn’t too cold. We’ve been planning this day for weeks.

My head hurts so much, and I don’t want to even look at the screen of my phone because the bright light is only making my headache worse. I want to just roll over and fall back asleep, but I know I can’t. I know I have to get up and get ready because Shawn’s supposed to be here soon. Even though I slept through the night and didn’t wake up even once that I can remember, I still feel like I haven’t slept in days. I don’t have the energy to move, so I allow myself a few more minutes of rest, if you can call it that. My phone buzzes next to me. “Hey baby, I’m leaving LAX now. I should be there in about a half hour. I can’t wait to see you, love you.”

We planned to cook breakfast at my apartment before we head out to the fair. I reply to his text, and halfheartedly get up. I manage to brush my teeth and put on makeup. I’m just finished with my makeup, and am looking in my closet to find clothes when there’s a knock on the door. I open it, and my heart leaps, as there is a surge of excitement within me. No matter how many times I see him, he still makes me insanely excited and happy every single time. He steps inside and wraps his arms around me, holding me. He kisses the top of my head because my face is buried in his chest, and he mumbles, “I missed you.”

“I missed you too.” I reply looking up at him.

He goes to kiss me on the lips, and I immediately remember that I’m sick, and I know the only thing worse than just me being sick would be if I got him sick too. “Don’t, I think I might be coming down with something.” I say stepping back a bit.

“Do you not feel good?” He asks concerned, and I immediately regret telling him. But what other choice did I have?

“No,” I straight out lie to him. “I just think I’m getting sick, and I don’t want to make you sick too.”

“You don’t want to kiss me?” He questions, a little suspicious.

“That’s not it at all. I don’t want to get you sick.” I insist.

“Alright, if that’s your story.” He says, grabbing my hand. He leads me to my kitchen and starts taking out the things to make breakfast. “I’m starving.” He states, “You hungry?”

“You’re always starving.” I chuckle a little trying to ignore the churning in my stomach at the thought of food.

He doesn’t really notice that I never answered his question as he turns on the stove and grabs a pan out of the cabinet. I love how he knows my apartment almost as well as he would know somewhere he lives himself. He puts the bacon in the pan and it immediately starts sizzling. I push any thoughts of the pain in my head or the exhaustion I’m feeling out of the way, and I force myself to be in the moment. I’m so glad to be here with him. I’m so glad to see him and have him here to cook breakfast with me. I grab the pancake mix and start making the pancakes. While we cook, he starts telling me about his flight here and some funny stories that happened at his last show. I turn on the stove to fry the pancakes, and he comes up behind me. Just his presence there brings me a peace. He rests his chin on the top of my head.

We sit down to eat, and I purposely do not take much food because I know I won’t eat it. Of course, Shawn’s plate is piled high. He digs in right away, looking up after a moment to see that I’m slowly picking at my food. “Are you not hungry babe?”

“Not really, I just woke up, you know how I am.” Which thankfully is true, and he knows. I don’t really like to eat right when I wake up. Hopefully because of this, he won’t be suspicious. Luckily, he accepts my excuse.

After breakfast, he offers to do the dishes while I change for the day, and I’m reminded once again of one of the many reasons why I love him. “Ready?” He asks when I return to the living room.

“Yeah, lets go.”

We walk hand in hand to the car that he rented. The drive to the fair is about a half hour. We just hang out and talk and listen to music the whole way there. Its crazy how much someone’s presence can feel like home. Shawn feels like home, and he makes me feel the most like me.  

The fair is everything I expected. Shawn slips on his raybans as he steps out of the car, and I know they’ll do nothing to keep him from being seen and recognized, but I don’t bother telling him that. He knows it too, but he doesn’t like hats. He likes to just pretend he’s as normal as possible because he thinks it’ll make him be noticed less. But he’s getting to the point in his career where it doesn’t matter what he does or doesn’t do, he’s going to be noticed anyway.

We walk around the fair, looking at all the animals first. Fans are noticing him and coming up to us every few minutes or so, but I’m not really bothered by it. I’m used to it by now.

It’s really hot out, and I’m just not feeling great. We’ve been here almost an hour, and I’ve only been feeling worse and worse as time has passed. I was really hoping I’d start to feel better, but unfortunately that isn’t the case. Shawn’s distracted with some fans, so I find a bench nearby and take a seat. I think the heat and walking around, and being really excited to see Shawn and everything has truly distracted me from actually listening to my body. Now it won’t let me ignore it anymore. “What’s wrong?” Shawn asks.

“Nothings wrong.”

“You don’t look so good.”

“Thanks babe, that’s just what I want to hear.” I reply sarcastically.

He sits down next to me, and really studies me for a second. “I’m sorry you’re not feeling good. I know you aren’t. Don’t try to say you’re fine.”

“How do you know?”

“You’ve been trying to hide it all day, I thought you were feeling a little sick, but I didn’t think it was this bad. Lets head back.”

“No, we had a plan. We’re supposed to go to the beach after this, and we haven’t even seen everything there is to see here. We didn’t even get a funnel cake!” I protest despite my body protesting against me.

“Do you want a funnel cake?” He asks.

“No,” I admit, “It’ll make me want to puke.”

He slightly shakes his head at me. “Alright, lets go babe.”

He holds his hand out, and I place my hand in his, intertwining our fingers. “I don’t want to ruin the day.”

He lets go of my hand, slinging his arm over my shoulder and pulling my body closer to his. “You didn’t ruin the day. All I wanted to do today was be with you. I don’t care if it’s at the fair or the beach or a hotel room. I just want to spend the day with you, that’s why I’m here. Not to see a fair or the ocean.”

If I didn’t feel so sick, I’d think that was insanely sweet of him to say. “I love you. I’m sorry still.”

“Don’t be sorry. I’m sorry that I didn’t notice how bad you were feeling. We’ll head to my hotel room. I’ll get you soup. You can sleep. And I’ll give you cuddles and sing to you. How does that sound?”

“Glorious.”