that crazy shit

youtube

(…)

Harry: (stop singing/yelling a song) Now… there are three things… theres…there’s more than three things that we love most about Canada. One…poutine! Two…poutine!! Three…wot

Liam: Protein!

Harry:  Three…no, poutine was one and two, this is number three. Number three is…P O U T I N E!!!!!! (crowd screams) Number four… (laughs) poutine! Number five, syrup. (yelling) NUMBER SIX SYRUP ON POUTINE!!! (screaming) Number seven and the one we love most of all, is every single one of you! Shhhh!!! Number eight, you and syrup on POUTINE! (screaming) That’s what I’m talkin’ about!!! 

Liam: You should… (something intelligible)

Harry: I really wanna mic drop, but I won’t, ‘cause they’re expensive.

Liam: Are you gonna run for president?

Harry: No! There’s not a chance, ‘cuz I don’t know what I’m talkin about! 

Liam: I still think you should, I’m convinced!

Harry: (screaming) Nine (looks at the flag) THIS FLAG, ON YOU, ON SYRUP, ON POUTINE!!!! MAKE SOME NOISE FOR CANADA!!!

Liam: You’ve gotta have a ten, you’ve gone through nine now you’ve gotta have a ten!

Harry : (scream)TEN! 

Liam: Ten! Us on syrup on poutine on… (gets lost) something else

Harry: Ten is (pick the moose on the floor) THIS MOOSE, ON THIS FLAG, ON YOU, ON SYRUP, ON POUTINE!!! Make some noise for the moose! (screaming to a fan) Which one d’you want, the moose or the flag or the syrup?  

Liam: Or the poutine?

Harry: Or the poutine? You can have the moose and the flag. (throws the moose and the flag to a fan) Ohhhh I’m hyped. Oooh I’m hyped. (start to do some weird moves)

Liam: (says someting intelligible to Harry)

*Harry and Liam start to dance and hum Rocky theme song*

Niall: tell em you’re gonna be president

Harry: (screaming, out of his mind) ROCKY!!! On the moose, riding on the moose, into this place on the moose, this is Rocky, he’s on the moose, he’s on his back, wrapped in a flag, covered in poutine, on the syrup, there’s syrup everywhere!!!

Niall : (laughing)Harry!

Harry: There’s lots of syrup everywhere! Rocky waits, the moose is gone… (get lost) 

Niall: Michael Buble!

Louis: That is passion!

Harry :  MICHAEL BUBLE! (is confused) Michael Buble on the shoulders of Rocky, wrapped in a flag, on a moose, riding in here, covered in syrup, on poutine, and you’re all everywhere watching the whole bit go down. 

Liam : I’m confused

Harry:  It’s gone too far, I’ve confused myself… this is story of my life, please sing along.  xx

2

time to dance // panic! at the disco

story time.

i went to a weird tech high school where you were pretty much allowed to do almost anything, and you were given an expensive macbook laptop to do ur homework and other shit on. its like normal high school except u could get up and go to the bathroom whenever and not get into trouble (kids asked anyway who am i kidding we feared getting yelled at jus for needing to take a whizz)

and one day, first year, two months in, the school had a big gathering because they were having a problem. yknow, with the expensive macbook laptops.

they were getting cease and desist warnings from dreamworks because somebody was downloading 25 illegal digital copies of the bee movie, every day, for two weeks straight. they were being threatened with lawsuits, so the principal and vice principal basically rounded up all these meme-infused teenagers, and told them, “stop downloading the bee movie. we could get shut down because of you. please stop.”

and it went on for another week because, whoever this kid was, hated this school so much. so much so that they tried to have it shut down in the most fucking ridiculous way possible. by downloading the bee movie, staring jerry seinfield, as many times as possible. illegally.

i remember one early morning, after i got my breakfast burrito, some friends ushered me over to one of the lunch tables and pointed to another friend’s computer. a pirating site was open, and the kid who was responsible was actually a friend of mine. they looked at me, the biggest shit-eating grin on their face, and pointed to, you guessed it, 25 illegal digital copies of jerry seinfelds the bee movie downloading all at once on internet explorer.

the real kicker was that, since the laptops were technically purchased and owned by the school, they werent tied to any of the kids legally. just the school as a whole. so no names or faces were mentioned at all in the illegal downloadings of almost 100+ copies of the bee movie, staring jerry seinfeld.

so the kid was never caught.