that beltbuckle

as fun as the ‘do you understand the meaning of undercover’-Blackwatch!McCree jokes are, here’s another thought:

Jesse McCree is an urban legend. Jesse McCree (and/or whatever name he was known by in Deadlock) is dead. Nobody got out of Deadlock and escaped jailtime alive. Jesse McCree can’t exist. And Blackwatch, obviously, also does not exist.

Jesse McCree in a Deadlock beltbuckle and 3′’ heels, in an all-black cowboy outfit in the middle of London, is refuge in audacity (if you’re familiar with “THE BUTTS MATCH” you know what I’m getting at). He doesn’t need to hide because he can’t reasonably be recognized. If you say “I saw Jesse McCree in all black and a cowboy hat and a fucking Deadlock insignia in the middle of King’s Row during the Null Sector crisis” you’re gonna be laughed at, at best.

anonymous asked:

This is a random TAZ-related question. I know lots of people picture John (The Hunger) as Jon Beltbuckle but I always picture him as like Anderson Cooper if he went on the lecture circuit for a while and then went through some Lovecraftian cosmic horror adventure. How about you?

i had no idea people were seeing him as jon arbuckle but that’s fucking hilarious. i also kinda pictured him as anderson cooper-y tbh, i think it’s just cuz of the voice griffin uses, it’s too serious and not joke-y. i mean, garfield the deals wizard sounds nothing like garfield the lasagna cat but since it’s a wacky silly voice i can picture it as him.

i rly want there to b a canonical plot relevant garfield and jon duo though like if the hunger got arbuckle-y enough to be believable i would die. it’d b a perfect summary to end the whole campaign

anonymous asked:

drabble for "you make me cry myself asleep," preferably for yoongi or wonwoo but anyone you want is fine? thank you so much, i hope you have a great day <3

(okay anon, this took me so goddamn long because i wrote about 4K words and accidentally deleted it. I cried in rage and went to bed and didn’t come back until i could think about this without wanting to tear each individual eyelash out. Here you go!)
(oh wait, also, i changed it slightly lol, but not a lot! just enough to fit with my idea)

TRIGGER WARNING: assault (sexual assault? I think this can be classified as such)

You sigh heavily, reaching up to subtly wipe some beads of sweat that were hanging from your forehead. Subtly, because you didn’t want any customers to see and think you were gross. Sweaty, because you’d been running around after people, fetching more sauce or getting a new meal because “this burger has no cheese and I specifically asked for cheese.” 
Your feet were completely swollen at this point, your trainers digging uncomfortably, and you needed nothing more than to just sit down to alleviate the pressure from your feet.

However, whenever you sat down, your manager would somehow sense it and come running round the corner, barking at you to get to work. 

So, there you stood for the sixth consecutive hour, wiping down a surface that didn’t need wiping as you looked for something to do. It was getting very late now, nearing the midnight closing time, and your heart soared at the thought of collapsing into bed and sleeping until midday. You loved Fridays.

A man with bleach blonde hair walked in with his girlfriend and you were reminded of the time your boyfriend’s locks had been the same colour. Honestly, Yoongi in any hair colour is a god-send, but for some reason, blonde Yoongi tugged even more on your heartstrings.

Glancing at the clock, you knew that he would still be working diligently at the next track. Work as a freelance producer was always hard to come by, and money was incredibly scarce. You were working yourself to the bone trying to provide for yourself and your boyfriend whilst also juggling full time education at the local college and the stress was evident in the slouch of your shoulders and the bags under your eyes.

It wasn’t that you felt resentful - not at all. You would do anything for Yoongi and if it meant taking a few extra shifts at the local diner, you would do it. However, when your boyfriend didn’t really come home anymore and barely looked you in the eyes, let alone spoke to you, it made the burden you were carrying feel so much heavier.

You felt completely alone, even if he was lying in the bed next to you, and nothing was worse than crying yourself to sleep and not having the one you love comfort you.

-

“Goodnight, Y/N, see you later,” your coworker called, giving you a small wave as she went on her way home. You returned the wave and gave her a smile, watching her go. A twinge of concern filled you as you watched her walk home alone, praying that she’d get there safely, before you turned to make your own way.

You considered calling Yoongi as you had always hated walking home alone at midnight, but you were afraid of interrupting a flow or annoying him. He always used to be waiting outside for you to get off his shift and you were too afraid of his reaction if you called him the first time he wasn’t there, so you just didn’t. 

Tucking your chin into your coat and shoving your balled up fists into your pockets, you started the trek home and hoped that you would get there safely too. Maybe you would pick up some food and drop it off at Yoongi’s studio before going home, knowing that he wouldn’t make the effort to get something to eat for himself. 

You were trying to quickly decide between getting him his favourite lamb skewers or a cheaper dish from a chinese takeaway, when you heard the footsteps behind you. Normally, you wouldn’t have paid them any attention but it was pitch black and the road in your crappy neighbourhood was poorly lit. Your nerves were already thinly strung and this was honestly the icing on the cake.

Quickening your footsteps when the place you usually bought his lamb skewers came into sight with its neon signs in the window and brightly lit up name, you were dismayed when the footsteps of the person behind you sped up too. By now, adrenaline had started to trickle into your bloodstream and  your breathing was speeding up. Panic had widened your eyes and you nearly broke out into a run when the footsteps got even closer. 
Finally, you smashed through the door of the restaurant and startled the young man at the cashier with your sudden entrance. Bowing your head and mustering an apologetic smile, you whirled around and scanned the streets behind you.

There was no sign of anybody who might have been following you.

Maybe you had imagined it. Maybe you were just too tired and you had thought up the footsteps behind you. Even worse, it was possible that the footsteps matched yours because they were yours; just echoed around you. Sighing at yourself, you turned to place your order and asked for it to-go.

From where you were, it would take maybe ten to fifteen minutes to get to Yoongi’s studio where you hoped he still was. The skewers wouldn’t stay warm enough to get to Yoongi’s and then home, so it was better for him to still be at the studio despite the late hour.

Twenty minutes later, plastic bag carrying the precious skewers in hand, you exited the shop and started making your way to Yoongi’s studio. Your face was tucked into the opening of your jacket again to try and conserve some heat, but it was difficult as it still somehow managed to force itself in through the fibres. 

It was the beginning of winter, and the cold was trickling in slowly, but it was blistering compared to the sweaty and humid summer you had only just recovered from. Your fingers were numb holding onto the plastic bag and your footsteps sped up considerably in your rush to get to Yoongi’s studio.

In your desperation to escape the cold, you had forgotten the phantom footsteps until they echoed around the deserted street and you barely had time to gasp before hands grabbed your left arm and shoved you sideways into an alleyway, out of sight from anybody who may be walking down the street.

“Hello, beautiful,” your assailant murmured in a greasy voice that made goosebumps erupt over your body. You shivered in disgust and dropped the lamb skewer bag on the floor, hitting against his stomach and chest with a burning desperation. “Where are you off to at this time?”
“Get the fuck off, you creep!” you spat angrily, thrashing in his iron grip. His fingertips were digging into your flesh painfully and you knew that you would wake up with bruises the next day.

If you woke up at all, that is.

“Watch your mouth, you slut. Who do you think you are?” He demanded, his breath pungent and blowing across your face. You scoffed, struggling again against him.
“Fuck off! Get the hell off me!”

Before you knew it, he had shoved you a few feet away from him, making your body stumble and fall to the floor, scraping your hand against the wall as you went. 
You scrabbled with your coat pocket, sliding your phone out and unlocking it as fluidly as you could with numb fingers and shaky hands. Slamming your thumb down on Yoongi’s contact name, you were quickly wrenched upright again and your shoulder blades were slammed against the brick wall again.

“Maybe I should teach you some manners, eh?” He spat, and you flinched feeling flecks of saliva meeting your face. “Girl like you, looking so beautiful tonight…”
“What the fuck!” You shouted, feeling his hand wander south and start to fiddle with his beltbuckle. “Get the fuck off! Help me! Help! Somebody!”

He snarled angrily, bringing his mouth to yours harshly and prying your mouth open with the hand that had undone his belt. His tongue invaded your mouth and you struggled violently against him, finally gathering enough common sense to raise your knee as hard as you could between his legs and he folded in half, gasping weakly and clutching his groin. 
Baling your right hand into a fist like Yoongi taught you to do all those years ago, you whammed your hand straight into his nose with a satisfying crack and fled from the alleyway as fast as you could, bending down slightly to grab the bag that was abandoned in the mouth of the alleyway.

-

Tears were streaming down your face, red hot and burning your skin, and your eyes were puffy. The streets were all deserted and you had finally gotten somewhere slightly better lit than the road where the incident had happened. Yoongi’s studio was quite close at this point, and you had left your phone behind in the alleyway in your rush to escape.

You were twitchy, adrenaline still coursing through your system from the attack, and you were focusing on every single noise that erupted near you.

The cold had numbed most of your face at this point and you could barely show your shock when you accidentally walked into a man who was rushing around the corner.

Stumbling back slightly, the mans arms shot out to right you, and you were quick to wrench yourself from his grasp. However, his voice sounded out before you could skirt around him and leave without saying a word.

“Y/N?” Your eyes shot up and met his worried ones, usually small but blown wide in terror. “Baby?”
Sobs erupted from your mouth and he gathered you into his arms, burying his face into your hair and soothing you gently, rubbing his hands up and down your back. You didn’t move at all, just standing there in his arms as he whispered his hushed apologies.
“Yoongi,” you sniffed, pulling away slightly. His arms moved to wrap around your waist and keep you anchored to him, allowing you room to move so he could still look at you. One of his hands shot up to wipe your tears from your face and rub a thumb soothingly against your cheekbone, then your jaw.

“What is it?” He asked, voice still hushed as if he was scared to startle you. 
“I got you some lamb skewers.” You half-heartedly raised the bag up to attract his attention and just like that, he started to cry.

Clutching you to his chest and resting his forehead against your neck, he cried quickly into you. You said nothing and did nothing to comfort him, still feeling far too jaded to do much of anything. 

“I was so scared, Y/N. I picked up your call and he was saying those things and you were shouting and I just, I didn’t know where you were and I’ve been looking for you and I didn’t know if you were okay. I thought I was going to puke and-”
“Yoongi?”
“Yeah?”
“Let’s break up.”

He was stunned, leaning back to stare at you. The tears had long since dried on your face but your eyes were dull and cold, scaring him more than your words.

“B-Baby?”
“We should break up, Yoongi.”
“But… But why?” His voice was shaky now, and he wondered fearfully what kind of thinking you had been doing to get from point A to B.
“Because you weren’t there.”

Guilt suddenly came crashing down onto his shoulders, making them physically droop, and he let go of you so he could breathe properly.

“Y/N, you- you know I would have been there if I’d known, if I knew something was going to happen-”
“Nobody knows if something like that is going to happen,” you said, voice so icy that he physically flinched. “It’s better for both of us if we break up.”
“No it isn’t. It isn’t better at all. Baby, I don’t want to live without you!” He protested hotly, hands raking through his hair and staring at you in shock. Fear, guilt, worry, and horror were flicking through his eyes, but you were tired.

You were so tired.

“Eat these while they’re still warm, if they are. I’m going home,” you said, lifelessly pressing the bag into his hand. “Delete my number.” 
“Y/N, wait, seriously, I don’t understand- ” He reached out and grabbed your wrist as you moved around him, but red hot fury sparked into flames inside you, and your temper boiled over.

“I don’t want to be with you anymore, Yoongi!” You shouted. “I’m so fucking tired of this! Of working my ass off every waking hour just to put myself through school and so I can actually fucking eat!”
He was silent, staring at you in shock with his mouth hanging open slightly.
“I’m sick to fucking death of coming home and you’re not there! You’re never there! All I want is my boyfriend who I love to be there when I get home and ask about my day and how I’m feeling, but I barely even get a text to say he won’t be home that night!”

Your chest was heaving, eyes wide and hair wild, but you weren’t stopping yet. Your words carved holes into his chest and more tears pricked at his water line.

“I could have been killed, Yoongi! I could have died, alone in that alleyway, on my way to bring you food because you never fucking bother to come home anymore.” you voice was lower now, more controlled, but his hands were shaking. “So, I’m done. I’m done with putting myself in shitty situations. I’m done with having a boyfriend who makes me cry myself to sleep at night. I’m fucking done.”

With that, you pulled your arm out of his grip and bowed politely in front of him.

“I sincerely wish you the best of luck with your life, Min Yoongi. I know for certain that you’ll go far one day.” 

You turned, and he couldn’t even say anything as you walked out of his life.

anonymous asked:

Hi! I'm new here but I'm in love already! I saw you're taking requests? Is there a chance you do a blurb on riding Harry's thigh? Xx.

Hello love! sorry for the late reply. 

I’m currently writing a one shot about this but I’m having really bad harry feels at the moment so what the heck. ;) enjoy! xx

Keep reading

Thank you for 3K lovlies!

So I finally decided to do a ‘follow forever’                                                 Here is a list of my favourite MAGCON blogs:                                            (Take note that I probably missed a couple of blogs out, sorry + some where deactivated)

420gilinsky // 8-8shawn // ahhmagcon // allthingsmagconboysss // asslikegilinsky // ayyitsmattsbae // ayyyyespinosa // badboydallas // baesicdallas // baesicmagcon // bccamerondallas // bigdickgrier // blesspinosa // bootylikedallas // cambaedallas // camdallus // camdattasstho // camdawgdallas // camgilinsky // caniffsmagcon // caniffsprincesss // cashdrier // cuddlyjacob // cutelikegrier // dasnashty // espinosa-my-nosa // espinosuh // espinosamattbae // exoticmendes // flawlesshawn // frickmematt // fvckmendes // gilinskyslay // gilinskyslut // gilinskytbh // hardcorespinosa // holygrierr // holymagcon // holyviners // hoodratmendes // iconicmendes // iconsmagcon // kinkygilinsky // magcon-austinm // magconexposed // mattsexpinosaaa // magcon-to-australia //mattslays // taylorsgrandpa // nashgriir // nashlyornah // nashsdickle // nashtymira // nashtypoo // nineboyz // omfgmendes // princessgilinsky // screwyoudallas // sexpinosamatt // shadymendes // shawnismymandes // shawnsbae // shawnsmirk // slayconn // staymagcon // supcaniffs // swaggieshawn // taylorcaniffsluts // tbhgilinsky // thejacksx // themagconfamily // tincandallus // totallymendes // ughgilinskyxx // ughviners // versace-beltbuckle // voguematt // woahespinosa // woahtheredallas // woahvineguys // xtincandallasx // zayumgrier //

3K means a lot to me means the world to me. Once again thank you!

(Advice: If you want/plan to do a follow forever, do it on the computer its so much easier and faster)

totallyespinosa.tumblr.com                                                                       xoxo

I’ve been here for around 1 ½ months now and I’m almost 100 away from 1k and that’s insane
But today was my birthday and I’m so thankful for all the birthday wishes I got so I thought I would do a follow forever
these are some of my favorite blogs but I don’t follow a lot but this is also a small one I’m pretty sure lol anyways here it is
taylor-caniffs-bandana
smendeser
thosevineboyzz
supcaniffs
espinostop
mendesbae
hamiltondallas
versace-beltbuckle
nashtyforlife
magconboyyz
totallymendes
slutspinosa
magconisliife
pumamagcon
espindallas
the-magconboys
matthotspinosa
nashty-is-perfectxxx
nashtybabe
bryannalovesmagconboys
camdallus
camdawgdallas
espinosa-my-nosa
nashgriir
fab-cult
fagcon
magcons
frickmematt
espindallas
maia822
holyviners
holymagcon
magcongurl
iconsmagcon
lolespinosa
lolmagcon
magc0nboys
ofcamerondallas
ollieandivy
princesskaelenespinosa
thejackgilinsky
themagconfamily
vinerbaes
zayumgrier

even if you weren’t on this list I love you forever and always and if you ever need anything I’m here for you and I can’t talk to you because in not scary at all I promise
I WUV YEW
and remember there’s always a light at the end of the tunnel and happiness is not the absence but knowing how to deal with them