thanks for showing me the video natasha!

2

“Good Morning America!” Darcy said enthusiastically.  “How’s the view from your part of the world?”

“It would be much better if you were here, Darce.”  He replied honestly. “And, I just got up.”

“You’re slacking off, Handsome.”  Darcy teased him.  “It’s 8a.m. in New York. What happened to your ‘ass crack of dawn’ morning run?”

“Can’t sleep good without you, Sweetheart.”  A hint of loneliness in his voice. “Been far away for far too long.” Darcy frowned.  She knew that Steve hated losing time with people he loved.  One of the side effects of his seventy years ice nap.

“I love it when you use song lyrics, to show how much you care about me”  Darcy said, trying to make him smile. “Much better than any mixed tape.”  

“That wasn’t intentional, it’s how I feel.  But, I’m surviving without you.” Taking a bite of his corn flakes before continuing.  “Not that I want to. Natasha kicks my ass when I start to mope.  I guess I have you to thank for that.”

“Yes, you do.”  Darcy explained.  “No one likes seeing a sad Steve Rogers.   It’s the equivalent of someone taking all cat videos off the Internet.  It’s something that you don’t want to happen.”

“I must sound lonely, needy and desperate for you.” Steve replied.  “It’s official, I’m in love.  I’m blaming you.”

“Damn straight you’re mine.”  Smiling and sounding very proud of herself.  “And, you’re not needy or desperate.”  You just miss your girl, and it’s nice to be loved and missed.”

“I’ve been away for a month, and the separation has been hard on me too.  But, it proves we’re not clingy or joined at the hip.”

“At least the time difference isn’t that huge.  London is four hours ahead of New York City.  You could alway steal the Quinjet, and come visit me.”

“Always an option.”  Steve said regretfully. “Unfortunately,  I have to be a responsible leader.  Putting my wants and needs aside, no matter how much I don’t like or want to.“

“Let’s blame Jane for our misery.”  She continued.  “How dare she be the world’s only expert on the Convergence. She’s finally getting the scientific acknowledgement she deserves, and a Nobel Peace Prize.“ 

“All the fame is keeping me away from my cuddly human space heater. At least, we both have our comfort foods.” Purposely slurping her coffee to prove her point.

“How’s your corn flakes, and what you call ‘real’ milk in the glass bottle?” She asked, and Steve knew what she was going to say next.  “Do you know the real reason corn flakes were invented?”

“Some crazy doctor thought it was a way to stop people from masturbating. An anti-sex food.”   It really was one of the most ridiculous, but true things that he had read about. “Internet so helpful.”

“And, how’s that working for you?”  Darcy laughed.  “You eat that cereal like it’s religion.  Is it curing that craving?”

“Not even close.”  He replied, his voice a little rougher. “You’re the only taste I crave.”

“Damn it, Steve!  Now I need to have room service bring me a few boxes of corn flakes…you know for Science.”

“Save the science experiment for when you come home.”  He laughed. “I’ll demand our money back if it doesn’t work.”

“Very funny.”  Darcy said.  “I already told Jane that when we get back,  I’m taking a few days off to work on my science experiment.”  

“Like Jane would have any say in the matter.”  He replied. “I’ll probably go all caveman on you.  Throw you over my shoulder, and carry you back to our apartment.”

“As long as it doesn’t end there.”  She demanded. “I expect a lot of sex and cuddling when I come home.  Phone sex, sexting you while you’re in a meeting and video chats don’t compare to the real thing.”

“I don’t sleep well without you either.  She finished, stifling a yawn.  “I need to feel you wrapped around me.  Guess that means I’m in love.  It’s all your fault.”

“Damn right it is.”  He replied, and Darcy could picture the smile on his face.  “I love you, now get some sleep.”

“Love you too, Steve.” She replied.  “I’ll hang up, and let you have some quality time with your anti-sex food.”

Steve hung up the phone, and ate another spoonful. Whoever believed that cereal was a cure for masturbation, obviously didn’t have someone like Darcy Lewis in their lives.

(Yes, it’s crazy but true. In 1894, two brothers, Dr John Harvey Kellogg and Will Keith “WK” Kellogg, were running a sanitarium and health spa in the town of Battle Creek, Michigan. Corn flakes were originally invented as a way to stop people from masturbating. )

Today the #YouTube channel I’ve been hosting since February hit 200K subscribers, which is still blowing my mind. (For the 1% of my followers who are friends and family, and wondering what the hell I am talking about, @KindaTV_ is the flagship YouTube channel of Smokebomb Entertainment, which produces original scripted web series like @carmillaseries… y'know, that lesbian vampire show!) Anyway, before I got this job I thought YouTube was just for cat videos and Tumblr was just for porn… so needless to say, this adventure has been quite the challenge and experiment for me. But it’s also been super rewarding, and cool to see how communities come together through it, and how much people enjoy watching me stumble around the Internet for some reason. So like, before this turns into a sappy inspirational post or some shit, I guess what I’m trying to say is thank you. Truly. by natvanlis