thanks for coming back to me. that was really brave

anonymous asked:

I'm drowning in my anxiety but my friends need me so I'm motivating them but the truth is that I need motivation too but I cant talk about my anxiety without crying

Hey my darling, thanks for coming to me! You sound very brave to be putting your own troubles aside to help your friends. I absolutely understand how you feel. A lot of my friends have the same struggles as I do and I’ve often been the one giving advice and motivation when I need it myself too. Relationships with anyone are a two way street though and if you often feel like you’re the one listening and validating your friends and you’re not getting that same validation back, I would mention it to them. A really good piece of advice I’ve been given is while bringing up a concern to someone, use I statements instead of you. Instead of saying something like, “you don’t motivate me” or “you’re not the only one with problems.” You could say something like, “I’ve been feeling down and anxious and I could really use some support. When we use I statements sometimes people can become defensive and feel attacked so this strategy has been very useful with me when bringing up things with my friends. There’s also no shame in asking for help. Maybe a counsellor might be good for you to talk to if that’s an option. If not then try and give your friends a chance when you’re comfortable. There’s no shame in crying and if it would help for you to talk about it with people who care about you I would go for it. I love you very much anon! Remember that your anxiety won’t always be so bad, this is just a rough path and you can get through anything. ❤