Why I Stayed || Part 1/2
Wooh second fanfic and I’m still trash. I really hope you guys like it, tbh this is so much better than my first one so like I’m glad but at the same time I wanna cry, ya know? Anyways, happy reading (or happy cringing if I’m right)
tags : @birkinvibes
request : Could u do a peter Parker x reader where he rlly likes Liz but the reader has been his friend for a while and she gets hurt over and over until she just gets mad?? Idk I think I just really like angst♥️♥️ thank u
Y/N = Your Name
words : 2007
“Did Liz get a new top?” Peter sighed dreamily.
“No, just never worn it with that skirt.” Ned replied just as dazed.
“Don’t you think you guys are being a bit creepy?” You questioned the boys sitting across from you.
Ned’s head shot over in your direction before he responded with, “We’re not creepy, we’re just admiring from afar.”
“Mhm, okay creepy.” You laughed.
Your attention turned to Peter, who was still gazing over at the most popular girl in school, Liz Allan. He’s always had a huge thing for her, and you wished that wasn’t the case. For years and years you’ve been holding feelings for your best friend, hoping he’d returned them, until the beginning of high school when he confessed to you about his infatuation with her. It crushed you.
“Hey, earth to Peter,” You waved your hand in front of his face, “You done gawking?”
Peter’s attention snapped to you and he cleared his throat, “I wasn’t gawking, I was just-”
“Admiring from afar, I know,” You finished for him, “It’s been two years now Pete, don’t you think you should get over her?”
Peter sighed and looked the other way for a moment before turning back to you and shaking his head.
“You don’t get it Y/N, there’s something different about Liz. She’s not like other girls and I know I’m probably the last person to have a chance with her, but-”
“But what Peter?” You cut him off, “If you think you’re the last person to have a chance with her, why do you keep doing this to yourself?”
‘Why do I keep doing this to myself when I’m the last person to have a chance with him.’ You thought to yourself.
“Why do you do that? Aren’t you the one who’s supposed to be helping me? You’re my best friend.” Peter’s eyes widened towards you with a mix of frustration and desperation.
“I am your best friend, and I’m only trying to protect you,” You said desperately, “I really don’t want to see you get hurt.” ‘I really don’t want to see you with her.’
“You really think I’m not even the slightest bit good enough?” Peter said in disbelief.
‘You’re more than good enough, trust me.’ You thought.
“No, that’s not what I’m saying, Pete,-” You were cut off by an alarm coming from Peter’s phone.
“Look, I have to go anyway. Stark Internship.” Peter got up from his place without another word and ran out of the lunchroom to do his thing.
You were the only one, along with Ned, who knew that the Stark Internship, wasn’t really an Internship. As it turns out, you’re best friend is the masked hero or vigilante, as most adult figures call him; Spider-Man. It took two months for you find out, and only because you walked in on Peter changing and the web crawler’s suit on the floor.
“You really have to tell him about how you feel,” Ned’s voice took you away from your thoughts, “You guys can’t keep going back and forth like this. It’s been months now.”
Ned was the only person who knew about you having a thing for Peter. He’s always urging you to tell Peter, especially when ‘fights’ like this happen.
“Ned, the fact that I like him had nothing to do with the point I was making earlier,” You sighed, “He’s going to get hurt really badly later on if he keeps fantasizing about being with her and can’t. I’m trying to protect him, and I’m not saying he’s not good enough, I just don’t trust people like her.” ‘I’m trying to protect him from every hurt I’ve felt when he didn’t want me because I wasn’t good enough.’
“Do you not trust her, or do you still love him?” Ned whispered to you, so no one in the crowded cafeteria would hear.
“Ned, for the last time, I’m over it.” You finalized.
As you sat there playing with your food and glancing around the room, Ned watched you and felt sympathy for you. It’s been years and years since you’ve been in love with the same guy, and years and years since you’ve been faced with rejection that guy didn’t even know he was giving you. You endured pain and heartbreak most days when he’d stare at Liz and stutter in academic decathlon when he’d talk to her.
Ned knew that even if Peter didn’t return the feelings you had for him, he’d always need you, and you knew that too. That’s why you stay. As his best friend, and nothing more, you stay and endure pain so he doesn’t have to. Whether it be as Spider-Man, or with Liz or Flash, or just being a teenager.
At least you had Spider-Man as something no one else knew about. At least when you were patching him up at nights, there wasn’t the topic of ‘how to get Liz’, there was just two best friends (despite you wanting it to be more) together.
There would always be a tap or knock on the widow in the middle of the night, and Peter would crawl in. Most of the time he would be hurt real bad. You would spend hours patching him up and talking about whatever you guys wanted. Sometimes you’d laugh a bit too loud and almost get caught by your parents with Spider-Man in your room. You never remember the hurt you feel then, it does, however, hit you with a bang the next day; but it’s worth it.
“Hey, I heard about the robbery. What happened yesterday? You never showed at my house, did you seriously come out unscathed? That’s impressive as hell.” You whispered to Peter, who currently had his head in his locker, reaching for books.
Once the locker shut and he turned his head your way, you couldn’t help but let out a gasp.
His right eye was coloured black and blue, he had nasty cuts on below the eye, on his lower lip, and right cheek. He looked like a mess.
“What happened?” You asked in disbelief and reached up to touch his injured cheek.
“Lots of guys. Big ones too.” Peter summarized and chuckled a bit.
“It’s not funny Peter,” You told him, “Why didn’t you come to me?”
Peter only smiled dreamily after and shook his head, “Something happened Y/N, something amazing.”
You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion, then your face lit up, “Did Stark give you like a promotion or something as an Avenger or to become one?” You whispered.
Peter shook his head and whispered back to you, “I was going to your place, but Spider-Man bumped into Liz,” he smiled as yours was falling, “And she saw that I was hurt and wanted to help, so she did… and I told her I was Spider-Man. Remember when she said she had a thing for Spider-Man in P.E.? It turns out she also has a thing for Peter Parker ‘cause she said yes to go out with me.”
You felt your heart clench and the sudden need to cry. Peter’s with Liz now. Even though you felt sad at the news, part of you was filled with anger. You were the person who patched him up. That was the only time you had with him. Spider-Man and being able to help him was something the two of you shared, but now Liz has a part in it.
“Oh.” Was all you could say.
“Yeah,” Peter’s smile widened, “There she is now! I’ll call you later, okay?”
He didn’t wait for your reply before he made his way over to his new girlfriend. You watched as she grabbed his arm, smiling. Watching them, all of your anger and sadness dissipated. You felt nothing watching them. Nothing.
It’s been almost a month since Liz found out about Spider-Man and the two have been together. It’s been almost a month since Peter stopped coming to you for help and started going to Liz. It’s been almost a month since you’ve spent every day building up anger and sadness that had yet to be released.
You were in Peter’s room studying for an upcoming science test, which was shocking, considering hanging out together had become something rare. He’s busy either with school, being a hero, or going out with Liz.
“Y/N, you’re a girl right?” Peter turned to look at you from his desk.
You furrowed your eyebrows, shifted in your spot on his bed, and said slowly, “Last time I checked, yeah.”
Peter laughed, “Sorry, I just need to ask you something.”
“Shoot.” You put down your textbook and smiled.
“My one month anniversary with Liz is coming up, ‘cause apparently that’s a thing, and I was wondering if you could help me come up with something to do. I really need a girl’s advice.”
The smile you had on fell quickly.
“How about you give her the role of best friend too,” You muttered under your breath,
“What?” Peter leaned forward in his chair,
“I said, I’m not sure what you should do,” You spoke again, “Liz and I are really different.” ‘That’s why I never had a chance. I can’t compete with someone like her. Especially when I’m losing you.
“Come on, I really need your help,” Peter paused, “You’re my best friend, Y/N.”
“Pete, just ask one of Liz’s friends. They’ll help a lot more than I will.” You sighed.
“I don’t want their help, Y/N. I want your help, you’re my best friend,” Peter huffed, “I need you now. I need my best friend. Can you please act like one?”
Your eyes moved slowly to lock with his.
“What did you say?” You said dangerously calm,
Peter furrowed his eyebrows, “I just need you to be my friend right now.”
‘He doesn’t get to say that,’ You thought, ‘That’s not fair.’
You stood up, “I’m gonna go home, I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”
You couldn’t stay there, you’d break if the conversation is to go any further.
Peter stood up from his chair and grabbed your arm, only for you to yank it out of his grasp,
“No, don’t touch me,” You had tears in your eyes, “I don’t want you to touch me.”
“Y/N, what’s wrong?” Peter reached for you again, “Are you okay, I don’t know what I said that-”
“Of course you don’t know,” You moved away from him again, “I-”
You cut yourself off and shook your head, “I just have to go.”
You moved as quickly as you could to get out of his apartment, only for him to follow you, until you lost him at the elevator.
‘I’m okay, I’m okay, I’m okay.’
You choked on a sob and held back the tears threatening to spill.
Once the elevator door opened, you made your way through the lobby and outside, only to be stopped by Peter himself.
‘He is Spider-Man after all.’
“You’re not going anywhere until you tell me what’s wrong.” He stated and put his hands on your shoulders, making sure you couldn’t go anywhere.
You let out a humourless laugh, “You’re not allowed to tell me to act like a good best friend.”
He stared at me in confusion, so you continued. ‘Fuck it.’
“I have spent years and years being there for you, being your best friend, and a damn good one, ‘cause I stayed because I knew you needed me even though it hurt ‘cause-” You shook your head and looked away from him for a moment before locking eyes again, “Because I stupidly fell in love with you.”
You felt his hands drop from your shoulders, “Y/N…”
You both stood there for what seemed like forever, not daring to look at each other.
“Y/N,” He paused, “I love you,” that made you look up and lock eyes, “As my best friend.”
From there you felt your whole world collapse. Looks like you stayed because you needed him, not because he needed you.