1. PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD IF YOU ARE BRINGING COFFEE/ETC. TO SCHOOL GET A SPILLPROOF CUP. rn i am flashing back to the month old coffee that got spilled in my locker, and how much i gagged whilst trying to clean it up. everything smelled like spoiled milk and it was awful. please get a spillproof cup.
2.you won’t need half the stuff you think you do. literally just get one big binder, some lined paper, a couple pens/pencils, and some highlighters.
3. don’t fuck w/ your sleep schedule. i speak from experience.
4. if you take gym, always bring your gym clothes even on the first day of class.
5. be nice to your teachers and they will let things slide. (i.e. late work, your inevitable sass)
6. holy shit don’t lose your textbooks/required reading/library books. pls just don’t.
7. always do the required reading because the one day you don’t will be the day there’s a goddamn pop quiz. also try to buy your own copy of the required reading, because a) the school copies are usually really old and gross and b) you can mark yours up. its super helpful to highlight and write in the margins, and then you dont need to take notes!!!
8. nobody really cares if you date/don’t date.
9. speaking of dating, DONT DATE THE SENIORS JESUS CHRIST
10. be nice to yourself. one bad grade isn’t the end of the world.
11. im gonna repeat this because it’s crucial: BUY A MOTHERFUCKING SPILLPROOF CUP.
12. don’t stand in the middle of the damn hallway. pick a side. don’t walk slow/text while walking either.
13. your english teacher will either be super chill and or satan spawn, there is no in between.
14. bring ur headphones. bring ur charger.
15. when you do shakespeare try to watch the film versions too. the plays aren’t meant to be read, they are meant to be watched and it will make understanding so much easier.
16. be nice to your friends. they’ll let you copy their homework.
17. don’t fuck around with your grades tho. pls try your hardest because all those D’s will kill your college choices.
18. don’t be nervous, it’s just another school year. you’ll do great :)
<b><p></b> <b><p></b> <b>Me, about a historical event:</b> uhhh... I think it happened in that century... It was pretty important I guess<p/><b>Me, about a historical event which took place on my birthday:</b> ah yes, the Battle of Cannae took place on the 2nd of August, 216 BC and was one of the greatest military defeats for the Romans, if not one of the greatest defeats of all time. The figures for the number of casualties varies, with Polybius estimating 70,000 deaths on the Roman side while Livy and Appian give a more likely figure of 50,000 as Polybius may have been influenced by Punic propaganda when writing his histories. The Carthaginians, led by Hannibal, had a far superior cavalry partly made up of their Numidian allies...<p/></p><p/></p><p/></p>
ALWAYS check to see if textbook websites have online coupons. Check outside websites like RetailMeNot.com but also sign up for their email listing. They often send you a coupon for just signing up and will continually send you other coupon deals.
Amazon has good deals on books sometimes and they offer college students temporary free membership. Here’s a link explaining some of the details.
Amazon and other retailers, like Barnes and Noble also offer textbook rental. You get the book for a certain amount of time (30 days, 60 days, 90 days, etc., then mail it back to them.) Much cheaper than buying.
Some professors put textbooks on reserve in the library so you can check them out for an hour or two instead of actually buying them.
If your class textbooks are at the library and you need them for longer than allowed, you can always photocopy them.
Look for Facebook pages/groups with your school name and year, people are always posting online to get rid of their textbooks.
If your books are older/literature type books they are often available as e-books for free or easy to find at used bookstore or thrift stores.
Ask your professor after hours if you can borrow and make copies of the class textbook.
Many colleges use the Link+ library sharing program or something similar. If the textbook you need isn’t offered in the library, another school within the program can deliver the book for free. Ask you school’s librarians about it.
If you have a class that requires a “reader,” which is just a bunch of articles, you can usually find them at the school library or online.
Keep your textbooks in the best condition possible, so they sell for higher when you no longer need them.
If you can access your class list and the emails of your classmates early, ask if anyone would like to share a textbook. Split the price and share it or just ask to copy the chapters needed.
If you get financial aid, set it up to deposit into your own checking account because FAFSA ATMs are frustrating.
Check out the dollar stores for some college supplies. They have pens, notebooks, planners, etc.
Find upperclassmen who are moving out of their dorms/apartments, they often sell/give away items they are no longer going to be using.
Find out if your department offers free printing to undergrads. If yours doesn’t, find a friend whose department does.
Pretty much every school offers a MS Office license to students for free. It may not be well advertised but make sure to find out before paying for the programs on your own.
Bulk supply stores are usually cheaper.
Use your phone’s planner and alerts for assignments.
If you need energy boosts, it’s definitely cheaper to brew your own coffee and tea, then use a travel mug. But if you need to go to places like Starbucks, sign up for the Starbucks card so you can get free refills on certain items and get discounts for members only.
Find out what free courses your school offers and go to them instead of paying for a tutor.
At many universities there are conferences and talks almost daily, which often offer free lunches and dinners.
Some colleges offer free cab services so make sure to look into that.
Most school health care places give out free condoms and they are often given out at events too.
Besides math, older editions of textbooks are usually just fine and much cheaper.
Thrift stores are great if you need items for your dorm or apartment, they have appliances and offer testing areas in a section of the store.
Specific to Seattle: There’s a place called Seattle ReCreative and you can get school supplies for extremely cheap.
Check when stores offer back to school sales and get supplies then for cheaper than usual.
Get your syllabus as soon as possible so you can photocopy all the needed pages in textbooks.
Look for websites that offer similar information in the textbook, sometimes it’s explained better online, gives examples, or just generally better worded.
Buy school supplies during tax-free weekend.
Apply for as many local scholarships as possible and do it every year in college, not just freshman year.
Ask absolutely every place you go if they offer student discounts. Many places don’t advertise this, but will offer some kind of discount if you show your student ID.
Find out if your school has assistance options for lower income students.
HERE is a list of food budget tips, recipes, and websites to help.
Some classes have extra fees for whatever reason, for example they will charge more if certain equipment will be used. If it’s not a course you need, sometimes it’s better to find cheaper elective classes.
Consider community college to save money, and then transfer to a 4 year school. Or attend community college classes during the summer but make sure to always check if the credits transfer.
If you need to use a credit card, try to get on with cash back rewards. Also check which banks offer perks for students, like free checking or a no-free policy for low minimum balances.
Check out your college newspaper and signs around campus. You will often find information about free events or find coupons with discounts on near by businesses.
School supplies that don’t sell at stores like Walmart and Target are extremely discounted during the last week of August.
I’ve seen study moods among the studyblr community and I think they’re super cute, so I decided to make some of my own. If anyone has already done any of these, I apologize! I did not mean to steal your idea. Nevertheless, I hope you try these out the next time you need inspiration to study. All study moods include 3 song suggestions and pictures.
The Hogwarts Experience:
Night time. (preferably winter). Big, brown desk filled with open textbooks and notes. Library, or a cozy room in your house. Candlelight, or lamps. Possibly near a fireplace. A cozy blanket to keep you warm. Subjects such as History, Science, or reading a book for a class. Harry Potter soundtrack playing in the background. A big cup of hot coffee.
1am-6am. Night before a big exam, or on finals week. All your materials layed out on the floor. Energy drinks and coffee. Sweats and a huge t-shirt. Upbeat music playing to keep you awake. Lots of review, flashcards, practice tests. Possibly some friends with you.
Early in the morning. A clean, white desk next to a window with sunlight pouring in. Studying just one subject, or reading a book. Eating breakfast and listening to soft, calm music. Birds chirping. Fall time. A cozy blanket thrown over your legs.
Laying in bed after a shower. Very light studying. Reading a book, or watching video notes. Lots of snacks and pillows. Calm music. Warning: probably going to fall asleep. During sunrise or sunset. Maybe in bed with a significant other, or pet. Coffee.
A whole day committed to studying. No distractions. In a library. Classical music plying through your headphones. Writing essays and dong lab write ups. Coffee and snacks. Laptop, books, textbooks, and lots of notes. Alone all day.
I have never taken a non-science college class. Meaning, I have
no idea how to take notes for humanities or social sciences. Not
saying this method won’t work for that, just that I can’t
guarantee it will. Also, this method is not about achieving pretty notes, only structured practical notes.
What you’ll need:
Notebook. I use a notebook. Most people I know use a notebook. Why should YOU use
won’t get as many handouts (if any) as in highschool.
won’t ask to see hw in your notebook. For all they care, your notes
could be a comic about the class. As long as you pass, you do
don’t have as many classes in a day so even if you carry around
notebooks, your bag won’t be all that heavy.
can divide it into three sections: class notes, seminar notes/work
and lab work. All in one for your studying comfort.
WILL reference that formula from 3 classes ago and when you have no
idea wtf they’re talking about, you can just flip a few
no one in your class wants to hear you snap loose leaf paper out of
your ring binder.
let’s be honest, your notes are going to get jumbled up any other
you’re taking a continuation class and you’ll need to revise from
these notes, it’s much easier to pull out a notebook than to look
through the thousands of notes from all your classes and try to
figure out which are the ones you need and what is the correct
pens, three tops. Blue for general notes, black for sections and the
other color for subsections or underlining. Go for black for general
note taking if you want to (I do it too sometimes) but blue strains your
notes: not every structure works for every subject and professor so
you should figure out a method for each one. That said, I usually
start out with a basic structure and then tweak it along the way to
better suit my needs:
name of the unit should be your ‘big title’. ‘ORGANELLES’
‘big topic’ (very easy to identify – usually the professor will
make it really clear that you’re moving on to a different topic or
it’ll be on the slides) inside the unit is assigned a number. ‘3.
’big aspect’ of that topic is a subtopic. ‘3.4. Structure’.
there are even more sub subtopics, continue with the numeration
system. Otherwise proceed to use bullet points for any enumerations.
If there are enumerations inside these enumerations (wow
enumerception), change your symbol for each level. Instead of bullet
points you can use dashes, squares, spirals, Xs…
exception for this is when the enumeration corresponds to steps in a
process. In that case, I number each step and circle the number.
each level you descend, indent your text. It’ll be easier to not get
lost. Skip this if you’re working with a small notebook and you’re
afraid of running out of pages.
notes are your best friend. Does some random piece of info the
professor just decided was important enough to be mentioned not fit
into your very methodic structure? No problem, add a sticky note.
Cute + calls attention to it, so you won’t forget.
It’s six in the morning, and Steve is heading out on a run when he nearly trips over a bouquet of sunflowers on the front steps of his brownstone.
For a second paranoia takes over, and he kicks the flowers a little, waiting for them to explode. They don’t. They also came with a card, which he picks up. The front of the card has a tasteful picture of the Brooklyn bridge at sunset. It’s very nice and sedate, like the kind of card you would buy to give to your boss. On the inside someone has written a short message in big, shaky block letters.
“Holy shit,” Howard says, crackling through the speakers. “You alive in there?” Lying is a sin, of course, but Steve’s not sure what else he can do. He’s already lied to the government and Bucky and God Almighty; and himself, himself most of all. He ought to tell the truth. That he’s not quite what they hoped for. That perhaps they should put him back into the ocean.
“Probably,” he says, instead, listening to Howard’s tinny laughter; and waits for the blast doors to unlock.
Steve gets out of the hospital in two days, but just barely. “I’m fine,” he tells Sam, Nurse Eunjung and the phalanx of doctors assigned to make sure Captain America didn’t bleed out and die and get bad PR all over their nice clean hospital. “I have an advanced healing factor. It’s fine. See? I’m standing.”
“That is not standing,” Sam tells him.
“You’re bending the IV stand,” Nurse Eunjung adds pointedly. “Let go and sit down, they don’t grow on trees.”
aka Steve and Bucky’s Global Honeymoon Revenge World Tour.
In which Bucky is the new kid, Steve is the square who takes him in, Tony and Pepper fight over valedictorian a year in advance, Thor remains a golden god, Loki remains a drama queen, Natasha commits an act of vigilante justice, Clint somehow fails to make a your mom joke, Darcy is a Satanist, Jane is a goth, Sif is fine thank you very much, Sam climbs a tree, Peggy says no, Rumlow is a bully, and Mrs. Rogers, Mr. Coulson, and Ms. Hill are all very long-suffering.
Or: the story of the year Bucky Barnes finally learned how to talk to at least one other human being, discovered J. D. Salinger, started to try in school (kind of), got a haircut, landed a punch, almost got arrested, and kissed a boy on the mouth.
“It could be a relationship, it could not be. You can assume either until you see for sure the results.“We all know those moments. Those moments when your family all gathers around you and asks "So, do you have a boyfriend yet?”. Bucky knows these moments all too well and, quite frankly, he’s sick to death of them. Unfortunately, being a 21 year old college student makes it harder for him to come up with excuses, and with Christmas coming up he needs to think of a way out fast. A chance encounter with a stranger through an old library textbook could just be the kind of miracle he needs to make it through the holidays with his last shreds of sanity intact.
He’s not the Asset. He’s not the Winter Soldier. But neither is he Bucky Barnes. With the help of Steve, Sam and the Avengers, James takes the long, slow road to recovery. Nothing is as easy as either of them thought it would be.
While on a mission storming a HYDRA facility, James Buchanan Barnes touches one of the many strange alien devices collected by the Red Skull. He does this, in fact, twice— in the past, and in the future.
Next thing he knows, Bucky Barnes is opening his eyes in the 21st century, which is full of great gadgets and coffee, and at least includes his old pal Steve. (And, inexplicably, a different Stark.) Meanwhile, the Winter Soldier finds himself in the middle of World War Two, helping Captain America hunt down HYDRA (which is at least familiar), pretending to be Bucky Barnes (which is not), and figuring out the very noisy group of soldiers who call themselves the Howling Commandos.
After Bucky was released from the hospital, it only took him a couple of weeks to give up on himself. Difficult to believe in any kind of future when the simple act of staying alive was almost too big an effort.
Out the frosted window, across the street, there was a tiny homeless guy burrowing under an awning.
Starting from the left:
Jaques Derrida - Gift of Death/Literature in Secret,
Douglas Rushkoff - Present Shock,
David Harvey - A Companion to Marx’s Capital,
Paul Vitz & Susan Felch - The Self: Beyond the Postmodern Crisis,
Adam Smith - Treatise on the Wealth of Nations,
Slavoj Žižek - The Sublime Object of Ideology,
Charles Strozier -Apocalypse,
Herman Dooyeweerd - In the Twilight of Western Thought,
Richard Osborne & Ralph Edney - Philosophy for Beginners,
Jensen Farquhar & Richard Askay - Apprehending the Inaccessible: Freudian Psychoanalysis and Existential Phenomenology (Studies in Phenomenology and Existential Philosophy),
I think that next skinny book is John D Caputo’s Philosophy & Theology,
Medard Boss - Existential Foundations of Medicine & Psychology,
Brent Potter - Elements of Self-Destruction,
John D Caputo - The Mystical Element in Heidegger’s Thought,
John D Caputo - Heidegger & Aquinas,
Martin Heidegger - Question Concerning Technology,
Daniel Dahlstrom - Heidegger Dictionary,
Martin Heidegger - Ponderings II-VI,
Martin Heidegger - Contributions to Philosophy (Of the Event),
Martin Heidegger - Zollikon Seminars,
Dreyer Kruger - An Introduction to Existential Phenomenological Psychology,
Irvin Yalom - Existential Psychotherapy,
George Schrader Jr. - Existential Philosophers: Kierkegaard to Merleau-Ponty,
Wilhelmus Luijpen - Existential Phenomenology,
David Edwards - Existential Psychotherapy,
Monica McGoldrick - Ethnicity and Family Therapy: 2nd Edition,
Edward Brecher - Licit and Illicit Drugs: The Consumers Union Report on Narcotics, Stimulants, Depressants, Inhalants, Hallucinogens, and Marijuana - Including Caffeine, Nicotine, and Alcohol,
Miles from any classroom, in the middle of Northern Nevada’s Black Rock Desert, Dana Albany, a “book sculptor,” creates a massive sculpture of the human body. It is composed of out-of-date textbooks and discarded library books. She names this giant figure: Body of Knowledge. It is burned to the ground. No one objects.
BODY of KNOWLEDGE by Dana Albany
BURNING MAN 2000, Black Rock Desert, northern NEVADA, USA
Prompt: While undercover at a school in New York, Tom falls for the pretty valedictorian and his partner for an English project.
Word Count: 3070
A/N: 3000 and several months later, I finally published another one shot!!! Yay! I’m not dead yet!
“I can’t believe it- I’m literally going back to high school.” Tom muttered angrily before biting into his toast for breakfast.
“Hey, you wanted to play Spiderman.” Harrison said, taking a sip of his tea.
“I know, but I didn’t think Marvel would legitimately send me to an American high school.”
As Harrison went to respond, his phone lit up, “Well, I got to go. Have fun at school, Stanley Osterfield.” He ruffled Tom’s hair playfully before leaving the room to answer his phone. Tom let out another huff of annoyance as he finished his meal. He fixed his hair in the bathroom mirror and grabbed his backpack, before heading out the door to his first day at an American high school.
Your AP Physics C instructor droned on about how magnetic fields are created as you drifted off into space. Just as your eyes were beginning to shut, the door squeaked open and a brown-haired boy walked in.
“I’m sorry. I got lost.” He said, handing Mr. Smith a pass. The teacher glanced down at him, then peered back up at the teenager.
“Transfer, eh?” Mr. Smith tossed the paper on the desk, “Take a seat in the back, next to Lucas.”
“Okay.” The boy said and began to walk to the back of the classroom. You, along with your classmates, stared at him as he walked; all of you wondering how-how he managed to get into the Bronx School of Science and Engineering at this point of the year. No one new had arrived since freshman year, so why suddenly in your senior year is someone knew arriving? He must be brilliant, in order to have bypassed all the tests and the waiting lists. You had a strange feeling about him. He looked all too familiar; when he passed by you and his brown eyes caught yours, you could’ve sworn you’d seen them before.
Your instructor continued with his lecture, acting as if he wasn’t questioning the arrival of a new student.
Four classes later, you saw him again. The new kid, Stan if you had heard the rumor properly, was in your physics class as well as your AP Literature and Composition class. This time, however, he wasn’t late, which seemed to please Ms. Hall.
“The AP Literature and Composition test is based upon your ability to analyze pieces of literature.” Ms. Hall spoke as she passed around a yellow sheet of paper with black printing on it, “For this project, you will be reading a classic novel and film a short movie based upon it. I will assign you a partner to work with on this project, as well as a book for it.” She then rattled off names in partners, calling you out last, “Y/N and Stanley, Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen.” You immediately looked over at the new boy. He simply pulled his beanie down lower and kept his head hidden in his arms.
Class continued as normal with no further discussion about the film project. After class, you went over to Ms. Hall’s desk to ask her about your partner.
“Y/N, are you here to ask why I partnered you with the new student?” She said before you managed to get a word out. You nodded sheepishly, “I did it because you are the valedictorian and my brightest student. I know you will do well on the project and I know that you will also manage to help him get comfortable in this school.”
“Okay. I think it will be fine. And, Ms. Hall, I am not valedictorian yet.”
“You’ve always been so modest. You will be valedictorian-I’m quite sure of it.” She smiled at you, “Have a good afternoon.”
“You too, Ms. Hall.” You replied, exiting the classroom. You headed straight for your locker to drop off your textbooks, so that you could head home.
“Excuse me, do you know where the library is?” You heard someone question. You turned around and were met with the eyes of Stanley.
“It’s on the other side of that building. You just walk down that hallway, through both sets of doors, and you’ll be there.” You explained.
“Right. Thank you.” When he turned to leave, you stopped him.
“You’re Stanley, right? The new student?” You said.
“Yes, that’s me.” He turned back around to face you.
“I’m Y/N Y/L/N, your partner for the English assignment.” You held your hand out for him to shake.
“Stanley Osterfield, but you can call me Stan.” He replied, shaking your hand with a smile.
“What are you off to the library for?”
“Textbooks-and also Pride and Prejudice.”
“If you give me a minute, I’ll walk with you. I need Pride and Prejudice as well.”
“Oh okay.” Stan said, waiting for you as you finished up at your locker.
“I have a copy of it, but I’m afraid my sister took it back to Florida, so I’ll most likely never get it back.”
“So you’ve read it before?” He asked as you both headed down the hallway towards the library.
“Yes, it’s one of my favorites. I’ve always been a fan of classical literature, especially novels from the U.K.”
“Have you ever been?”
“To the U.K.?” You questioned and he nodded, “Never, but I’m hoping to study at University College London next year.”
“UCL? Isn’t it hard to get into?”
“I suppose, but I’m hopeful.”
“Well, you’ll love it there. I’ve been to the U.K. quite a few times and it’s great.”
“Do you have family there?” You asked and Tom laughed with a nod.
“Yes, yes I do.” He responded as he held the library door open for you.
“So, Stan, how was your first day of school?” Harrison asked when the front door of his shared apartment with Tom opened that afternoon. He had been sitting on the couch, watching TV while eating chips.
“Boring and long.” He stated, dropping his backpack and books off on the dining room table.
“Make any friends?”
“No; besides, I’m only here for a month.” He stole the bag of chips from Harrison on his way to his room.
“What are all the numbers on your hand then?” Harrison called after Tom.
“Homework.” He responded as he shut the door between them. Tom looked down at his hand where the numbers were written. He hadn’t meant to make friends, but he somehow had become acquainted with you on his first day. He didn’t refuse when you offered to give him your number, so that you could communicate for the project. He continued to tell himself that it was for a project and not for any sort of relationship.
A few weeks later:
“Stan, I’m serious. The project is due next week and we still have to film and edit it. When will you be open?” You questioned as the two of you walked down the school hallway. Tom kept joking around and you could see that he was far from taking this project seriously.
“I can do whenever. I haven’t got any plans this weekend.”
“Ok, so we’ll film at my place tomorrow. And then you are going to study for that physics test.”
“But physics is boring.” He whined as you opened your locker.
“Oh well. You need to pass this test.”
“But it’s so hard. I don’t understand anything.”
“I really have no clue how you got into this school. You don’t know a thing about science at all.”
“I know Newton’s three laws.”
“Stan, everyone knows that.” You laughed, rolling your eyes at him.
“I’m an idiot, but that’s why I have you-the smartest girl in school- to help me.” He smiled as the bell rang.
“I’ll see you in second period.”
“See you then.” He replied as he took off to make it to class. You sighed as you closed your locker. At least it was a Friday.
“Are we doing British accents or not?”
“I can work with British.” Tom said, switching into his normal accent, as you two carried on up a small hill, where you’d begin filming.
“You definitely have spent a lot of time in England for your accent to be that good. I don’t know many Americans who can talk like that.” You laughed.
“I’ve had practice. Your turn.”
“Yeah, I think we’re going to stay with normal American accents because my British accent is terrible.” You stated, setting up the camera on a tripod.
“Alright, we’ll do American accents. Might make it less legit.” Tom said, making you shrug.
“I just want to get this over with. Ready, Mr. Darcy?” You asked.
“Always, Miss Bennet.”
“Let’s start it then.” You pressed play on the camera and got into position in front of Tom.
“I couldn’t sleep.” You said.
“Nor I. My aunt-”
“Yes, she was here.”
“How could I ever make amends for such behavior?”
“After what you have done for Lydia and I suspect Jane also, it is I who should be making amends.” Tom stepped closer to you, prepared for Darcy’s speech.
“You must know, surely you must know, it was all for you. You are too generous to trifle with me. I believe you spoke with my aunt last night, and it has taught me to hope as I’d scarcely allowed myself before. If your feelings are still what they were last April, tell me so at once. My affections and wishes have not changed, but one word from you will silence me forever.” He stepped closer to you once more, “If, however, your feelings have changed, I would have to tell you: you have bewitched me, body and soul, and I love… I love… I love you. And I never wish to be parted from you from this day on.” He delivered the lines with such ease and fluidity that you stood frozen, staring into his big brown eyes, completing forgetting about the rest of the world.
“Y/N.” He mumbled, causing you to snap out of your trance.
“Right! My line!”
“Were you distracted?” Tom teased as you went to stop the camera.
“No, what makes you say that?”
“You just kind of zoned out staring at me. Does that mean I’m a good Darcy?” He asked and you playfully rolled your eyes.
“Let’s run it again.”
“Can you handle that?”
“I’m fine. I just forgot my line. That’s all.”
You ran through the scene a few more times and each time you were amazed by Tom. As you were packing up you camera, your stomach growled at you.
“Are you hungry? We can go get something to eat.” Tom asked, putting on his sunglasses, despite it being overcast.
“Sure. Where do you want to go?”
“I know this amazing taco place not too far from here.”
“Sounds good to me.” You shrugged, zipping up your camera bag. Tom took your hand, leading you through the park to the taco place, which turned out to be a taco truck.
“When you said amazing, I was thinking fancy restaurant.” You laughed, taking a bite of your taco.
“Is this not fancy?” Tom asked, accidentally slipping into his British accent.
“I still can’t believe you can speak with a good British accent.” You stated.
“I’ll have to take you there someday.”
“Take me where?”
“I can’t afford a spontaneous trip to England, Stan.”
“True, because you’ll be going there next year.”
“I haven’t gotten my acceptance letter yet. I’m starting to get worried.”
“If you don’t get in to UCL, that’s okay. You’ve got a handful of other brilliant colleges waiting for you.”
“I know, but UCL has always been my dream.”
“You’ll be fine. I believe in you.” He encouraged as your phone went off.
“Sorry, Stan, I have to go. My mom wants me home.” You stated, standing up to leave
“I’ll walk you home.” He replied, following your actions. Tom walked beside you the entire walk home as you two continued your chat.
“Well, this is me.” You said, “Thank you fro tonight, Stan. I had fun.”
“Me too.” He replied. You both awkwardly stood there for a moment, waiting for the other to make a move. You turned towards the door.
“I should go.”
“Wait.” He called out and you turned back around to him. “I really like you, Y/N.”
“I like you too, Stan.”
“No,” he said, getting closer to you, “I really like you.” He repeated, leaning in to kiss you.
“How was filming?” Your sister asked you when you walked in the door.
“It was great.” You smiled, “We got everything done.”
“Seems like something more happened.” She said.
“Nothing happened. What are you watching?” You asked, looking at the TV.
“Captain America: Civil War.”
“Is Thor in it?” You asked. You’re not one to be big on superheroes, but you did have a soft spot for the God of thunder.
“No, but Spiderman and Black Panther are in it.”
“I didn’t think Spiderman was an Avenger.”
“It’s a long story. He’s about to pop up, wanna watch?”
“For a few, but I’ve got chores.” You said, sitting beside her on the couch as she played it. “Queens” was shown in big, bold letters as a song began to play.
“How was school today?” A woman off-screen asked as the camera focused on the back of a teenage boy.
“Okay. This crazy car parked outside-” he cut himself short as he saw whatever was behind the camera. You didn’t care about the plot-you cared about the character.
“What?” Your sister asked.
“That’s Stan.” You said in disbelief.
“Stan? Stan who?”
“Stanley Osterfield. He’s new to my school and we’re partners for an English project.”
“That’s Tom Holland-not Stanley Osterfield.”
“They look the same and speak the same.” You pulled out your phone and searched up the unknown actor. “I don’t believe this.”
“They are literally the same person. He’s faking it. He’s British and he’s 20.”
“Hey, Y/N, look what came today?” Your mom said, showing you an envelope with the letters UCL in bold.
“It came!” You shrieked, discarding your phone to grab the letter. You opened it with shaking hands and began to read it.
“I got in! I got in! UCL accepted me!” You exclaimed eagerly.
“Hey, Y/N.” Tom said Monday morning when he stopped by your locker, following his routine. You stayed silent, deciding to ignore him.
“I heard you got into UCL. Congratulations, I knew you could do it.”
“Thanks.” You said flatly, slamming your locker shut and beginning to walk away.
“Did I do something wrong?” He asked, chasing after you. When you remained silent, he questioned you more, “Is this about Saturday?”
“What are you doing here?” You replied, halting and turning to him.
“What do you mean?”
“What are you doing here? At the Bronx School of Science and Engineering? You’re not looking for a career in science or engineering. You’ve already got a career, don’t you, Tom?”
“Y/N, I have no clue what you’re talking ab-”
“I don’t want to hear it. I know you’re not Stanley Osterfield and I know you’re not even American. You’ve been lying to me-all this time.”
“Look, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for it to go this far.”
“This far? You’re the one who kissed me the other night.” You were furious at ho he remained calm.
“I know. I’m really sorry, just please understand I never meant to hurt you. I wasn’t lying to you when I told you how I felt about you. My name and my accent was all I ever lied about. Please, believe me.”
“I don’t know what to believe anymore. I need time. Please, St-Tom, just leave me alone for a little bit.”
“I will, but please just know two things: first, tomorrow, I am going back to London and my time here will be up; and second, I love you and, as cheesy as it is, I never wish to be parted from you. I’ll leave you alone now. Goodbye, Y/N.” Tom walked away in defeat as you stood there trying to compose yourself.
The next morning, you received a text message from an unknown number, reading: ‘Y/N, you don’t know me, but I am Harrison Osterfield and, as Tom’s best friend, I’ve heard a lot about you. I’ve known Tom for many years and he’s not one to easily fall in love, but, somehow, he fell in love with you quickly. His intentions were originally to witness a New York high school first hand; then that all changed with you, on the very first day. I just wanted you to know that Tom loves everything about you. Our flight to London leaves at 9, but below is our flat address here in New York, in case you wanted to say goodbye to him.’
You sat still for a minute, deciding if you wanted to go see him off or not. Looking over at your bedside table, you saw your UCL acceptance letter sitting on top of Pride and Prejudice.
“How are you holding up, Y/N?” Your mom asked, walking into your room.
“I don’t know what to do. For the first time in my life, I’m utterly clueless. I’m upset that he didn’t tell me the truth, but I think I love him, mom.”
“Elizabeth Bennet gave Mr. Darcy another chance. Maybe Tom is your Mr. Darcy.”
“His flight is leaving soon, but I’ve got school.” You told her.
“Quit making excuses and go. Go find your Darcy.” She said and you smiled, racing out of the house.
You arrived at the complex and breathlessly knocked on the door. After a moment, it opened to a surprised Tom.
“Y/N, what’re you doing here?” He asked.
“I came to stop my Darcy from leaving me.” You said, causing a silly smile to form on his face.
“If you’ll still accept me as your Elizabeth, that is.”
“Your affections and wishes have changed?”
“Very much so.” You said, taking his hands in yours, “You’re hands are cold.” He laughed in reply.
“Are you two going to continue being nerds or are you going to kiss?”
“I know.” You laughed, “And he’s right. We should kiss.”
“Yes we should.” Tom said, before giving you a kiss.
Imagine: You were once a Southside Serpent assigned to train Jughead Jones III in the Serpent way of life. After being shot by a comrade, you decide it’s time to take some time off and focus on your education by transferring to Riverdale High. However, it looks like trouble will follow you wherever you go.
The moment you walked into Riverdale High School, everyone turned to stare.
You were an unrecognizable girl with slightly disheveled hair and a death stare for anyone who made eye contact. Somewhat laughably, you had traded out your comfortable leather jacket with the snake on the back for a pink cardigan and skirt, and you looked as out of place as you felt. You recognized who Jughead had described to be Archie, Betty, Veronica, and another boy their age. Upon seeing you, they whispered at each other and made wild hand gestures. You rolled your eyes, continuing to the locker the secretary had assigned to you.
Fidgeting with the combination lock while trying to read the scrawled out code she had written for you, a familiar figure strode up next to you and leaned on the wall.
“New look, huh?“ Jughead asked. He, too, had left his jacket at home. Surprisingly, he left the beanie too.
Transferring to Riverdale High after having dropped out for a few months and being an emancipated minor was no easy feat. With Jughead’s help, you pulled a sob story about how you realized how awful the real world was and needed a good ole’ public education to set yourself straight, which elicited elitist approval from the school board. Jughead’s foster family was fortunately very sensitive to Jughead’s needs and desires, and signed the transfer forms as soon as he brought up that he missed his old friends (which he didn’t).
You snapped your gum at him. “Some of my mom’s old clothes. Wanted to look inconspicuous.“ You laughed. “Does it look as hideous as it feels?“
Jughead shook his head earnestly. “You look kind of cute, to be honest.”
Rolling your eyes again, you eyed him up and down. “And you? Where’s the hat, kid?”
He grinned. “I dunno, it seemed like you liked me better with it off.” He ran his hands through his hair.
Your face reddened and you shoved him playfully. “I’m still your superior, you know. Just ‘cause I got shot doesn’t mean I can’t kick your ass.“
As the two of you laughed and you finally were able to start sorting your books in your locker, Jughead’s friends approached him.
Find a comfy position, grab a tea and get ready to binge-read the heck out of these wonderful fics! At the beginning of the month I asked followers and stucky lovers on tumblr to send in their favourite Stucky fanfictions which had been written and completed in 2015. I cannot thank everyone who submitted their favs enough! This is the most EPIC list on this blog and it is all because of you guys! But enough rambling from me. Happy readings! And I wish everyone the very best in the New Year!
All fanfictions listed below are for the pairing Steve Rogers/James “Bucky” Barnes. There is no order to this list. Please read all tags and author notes before reading.
“It could be a relationship, it could not be. You can assume either until you see for sure the results.”
We all know those moments. Those moments when your family all gathers around you and asks “So, do you have a boyfriend yet?”. Bucky knows these moments all too well and, quite frankly, he’s sick to death of them. Unfortunately, being a 21 year old college student makes it harder for him to come up with excuses, and with Christmas coming up he needs to think of a way out fast. A chance encounter with a stranger through an old library textbook could just be the kind of miracle he needs to make it through the holidays with his last shreds of sanity intact.
Steve looks up and holds his blown black eyes. “Tell me how you want to fuck me.”
Bucky’s mouth drops open a little and his eyes roll. “Slow,” he slurs, his body is rocking back and forth with Steve’s touch, “So slow. So slow that you beg.” Bucky lifts his head again. He pushes his forehead to Steve’s and his voice dips, “So slow you start fucking yourself on it. And deep—” Bucky moans, biting his lip, “So fucking deep. Spread you open so I can get deeper. Make you come so hard you beg for more before your cock’s gone soft.”
Based on prompt: Pretend Boyfriends AU where one of their families is always wondering why they’re never in a relationship, so the other offers to pretend to be their boyfriend for some family event"
Basic Steps to Getting Yourself In a Pickle With Both Your Family and The Guy You’ve Secretly Crushed On For Five Years (A Guide):
STEP 1: After being perpetually single and constantly making up excuses to your family, give in and lie about having a boyfriend. STEP 2: Agree to bring said boyfriend to the family cottage for a week so he can be your date to your parents’ wedding anniversary party. STEP 3: Panic. STEP 4: Say ‘yes’ when your best friend and closet crush - who you’re convinced isn’t interested in you that way in the least - offers to be your pretend boyfriend. STEP 5: Try your best not to fall in love with them during the trip. STEP 6: Fail miserably.
He’s not the Asset. He’s not the Winter Soldier. But neither is he Bucky Barnes. With the help of Steve, Sam and the Avengers, James takes the long, slow road to recovery. Nothing is as easy as either of them thought it would be.
Steve Rogers has lived for entirely too long—long enough to see the world’s end. The heroes are gone, and the Earth is pushing what’s left of mankind towards the exit.
But when a makeshift team rises from the ashes, when a mysterious presence all but drags Steve there, he begins to think there may be hope yet. As they shoot for the stars one last time, Steve will get proof yet again that the future is nothing if not an echo of the past.
In which Bucky gets knocked out briefly during a mission, wakes up fine, and then spends a day enduring strange hints, clandestine looks, and cryptic texts from his friends. Steve will never let him live this one down.
Bucky didn’t even glance up from beating the trembling heavy bag to death. “You’re gonna tell me that being turned into the Red Room’s assassin and then Hydra’s fucking attack dog for seventy-whatever years wasn’t my fault and that Tony was talking crap and you can’t think of anyone more worthy to hold Mjölnir than me.”
“Well, you’re right,” Steve said, only barely surprised. “So why the hell are you still down here?”
The look Bucky threw him was too resigned for a glare. “Because we both know that’s bullshit.”
“[…] lesbians and gay men writing letters to their lovers and friends faced the special problem of wartime censorship. Military censors, of course, cut out all information that might aid the enemy, but this surveillance made it necessary for gay and lesbian correspondents to be careful not to expose their homosexuality. To get around this, gay men befriended sympathetic censors or tricked others by using campy phrases, signing a woman’s name (like Dixie or Daisy), or changing the gender of their friends. Sailors became WAVEs, boyfriends became WACs, Robert became Roberta. There must exist, hidden in closets and attics all over America, a huge literature of these World War II letters between lesbians and between gay men that would tell us even more about this important part of American history.” - Coming Out Under Fire: The History of Gay Men and Women In World War Two, by Allan Berube
“I didn’t know he did that,” Tony said. He knew Bucky liked tucking himself so far under Steve’s arm that it was like he was trying to climb into his armpit. But he’d always stayed upright, just kind of plastering himself against Steve’s side. This blanket thing was new.
“Seventy years of skin hunger,” Steve said. His voice was just as soft, but for a moment his eyes flickered hot with anger, bright as the candy-colored screen. “He was always tactile. Now, when things get…well, sometimes it helps. The contact.”
And it looked…nice, the two of them together like that: Comfortable. Familiar. Safe. Tony knew what a precarious, fragile thing it was, to feel safe in the middle of the night.
Steve took a few deep breaths. He wasn’t sure he could handle another minute with this monster. “And what about me? I’m an easy target, aren’t I? Why aren’t you killing me right now?”
The man frowned. He seemed confused as well. “I don’t want to.”
“Why did you bring me here if you won’t kill me?”
Another damn shrug. “Felt like it.”
“Oh, god,” Steve groaned. He had been taken to god-knew-where on the complete whim of a murderer. And he thought his life sucked before.
Steve’s life was normal enough. He had an average job and a crappy apartment. Boring, but he knew it could be worse. Unfortunately, it does become much worse for him when he encounters one of the most infamous serial killers in U.S. history and is swept up into his world. Steve must now do his best to survive and maintain his sanity, all the while trying to figure out what his captor really wants.
Following exposure of his past as the Winter Soldier, anonymous postings of explicit video footage, 63 charges of murder and the wrath of the Internet, James Buchanan “Bucky” Barnes finally steps into the limelight and tells his story to Zenat Patel of the New York Times.
Sometimes they’re just obnoxious to each other for the sake of being obnoxious. It must be some left over behavior from years of being in each other’s pockets. Playmates, schoolboys, roommates, army boys, lovers – there’s a lot of relationship in there. The others don’t even try to pretend they get it.
Steve Rogers is a struggling artist. It’s not as romantic as it sounds.
What Steve really wants is a job as a session musician. He can play enough instruments that he could make a decent amount of money doing it, but in New York there are just too many talented musicians and not enough jobs to go around. So he takes jobs in hipster bars, hotel lobbies, at weddings and bar mitzvahs and office parties.
If he gets one more request for Let it Go, he swears he’ll find it within himself to punch a child.
He lives in a tiny, shitty apartment with Sam, who was his sort-of-boyfriend for a few weeks until he decided Steve’s very domestic relationship goals weren’t for him. They’re still pretty much best friends, luckily for Steve, because when the regular pianist at Sam’s dance company runs away to Canada he’s recommended his roommate and got him the job before Steve even knows about it.
Dancers. Steve’s going to have to spend his days with dancers. Great.
They look nothing like what they used to. Time and life have completely changed them. But as they sit there in silence, eating two halves of one cupcake, letting Brooklyn remind there where they came from, and enjoying a sky full of stars… They are those same little boys, somewhere deep down. For just a second, you’d be able to see them again.
And Bucky thinks to himself that maybe it’s little moments like these – fleeting as they may be – that remind him why life is still worth living.
Steve operates a fruit & veg stand at a farmer’s market. Bucky keeps bees and has started up a honey shop just opposite. They’re failing to get along. Steve gets along a lot better with the anonymous friend he’s been writing letters to. In fact, he’s rapidly falling for him.
Steve lives in Stark Tower and doesn’t have much to do when he’s not going after Hydra strongholds. He attends charity events to make Pepper happy. He goes hiking with Sam. He hangs out with Clint in Bed-Stuy and watches Dog Cops. Sometimes Tony gives him super alcohol in a sippy cup. Sometimes he sees Bucky out of the corner of his eye and wonders if it’s real or if he’s starting to lose his mind.
Alternately, the one with terrible jokes, a foot chase through the Lower East Side, and a tiny little robot named Shitcan.
And maybe, maybe someday Bucky will have to tell Natalia exactly how fucking glad he is none of her attempts to set Steve up worked, and how it has nothing to do with jealousy and everything to do with how sex, sex that works, makes Steve’s walls drop like fucking water.
And how it’s hard to tell what’s worse, because if you know what you’re looking at you know how easy it would be to fuck him up and that makes him such an easy fucking target - but if you don’t, you might just do it by accident anyway.
There wasn’t anything left to salvage. That’s what Fury believed. It would have been a kindness to put him down.
When SHIELD finally releases Bucky from custody, he is not the man anyone expects him to be. The ruthlessness of the Winter Soldier is gone, replaced with a child-like wariness as he struggles to communicate his warped understanding of who he is and what was done to him. But with Hydra scrambling to regroup, SHIELD takes dangerous measures to secure Zola’s algorithm to use against them, and Steve is dragged back into battle, forced to weigh what’s best for Bucky against what’s best for the fate of the free world.
Then Bucky is abducted.
Steve races to recover his friend before the man who was Bucky is gone forever. When the rescue stalls, he starts to crumble under the weight of everything he has lost and everything the war has taken from him.
Meanwhile, Bucky confronts a terrible piece of ex-SHIELD tech that was in development long before Project Insight, but in order to survive, he must decide who he is going to be: the vulnerable Bucky Barnes or the indomitable Winter Soldier? It turns out there might not be as big a difference as everyone seems to think.
Sam meets Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes on a Thursday night, at a burlesque show, and how it happens is this:
It’s already late, later than he should be out on a weeknight, but the theme of the show was a super hero revue and there was no way he was gonna miss that. It’s loud in the venue, which is the back space of what probably used to be a warehouse right near the Gowanus Canal, and Sam’s already had a few. He’s up at the bar during the break, watching the act. He doesn’t hear someone say, “Behind!” so when he steps away from the bar, he smashes right into the guy who’d just done the Captain America routine up on stage, and knocks his drinks to the ground.
- Or, I wanted to see more stories that captured the weirdness and complexity of being queer, in your late 20s, and trying to date in Brooklyn - which is my life - so I wrote one. Takes place in the MCU.
Peggy Carter recruits Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes to fight against Baron Zemo, a man who desires the powers of the entity that has taken a liking to Steve Rogers. The Howling Commandos search Europe for artifacts with the mission to retrieve them before Zemo’s Secret Empire can, but the Baron is ruthless and patient, willing to play the long game.
As the world explodes into a war seeped in occult forces and lead by madmen, Bucky has to admit for his own peace of mind that he’s always loved Steve Rogers and would follow him into any kind of war, no matter how strange.
Steve Rogers doesn’t meet Bucky Barnes in the 1930’s. Instead, Steve meets him April 17th, 2012.
Well…sort of meets him.
In actuality, Bucky had almost hit him with his truck.
Or: The fic where millennial Bucky Barnes nearly runs over a freshly thawed national treasure, and what Steve Rogers did to adjust to modern NYC during those two weeks before the events of The Avengers.
"Where am I? Where is this?” and he was in Brooklyn, he was on a beach, the train was shaking around him. He was in the plane, ice splintering up onto the windshield. He was in a tank, tubes trailing from his face, from his groin. Christ, he was cold. There was still ice on his fingers. He was in the Grand Canyon. He was in Times Square. This couldn’t be Times Square. Where the hell was this? “Tell me! Where am I, who are you, where's—” —Bucky?
No one knows Steve Rogers is a witch until he nearly dies and accidentally creates a familiar to save himself. The familiar is part cat, part ghost, and shares Steve’s soul. His name is James Buchanan Barnes.
But little boys don’t have cat ears, claws, or tails, and they’re terrible at keeping secrets. To protect them, Sarah Rogers asks a witch to make Bucky seem human, and then enchant the boys to forget he’s not.
Steve and Bucky grow up inseparable, but they don’t talk about how they know when the other’s hurting, and Bucky never tells Steve about the urge to hunt he can barely control.
He’s terrified he’s a monster, and then the War comes and then Azzano, and Bucky finds out he’s right.
And then he falls, and Hydra finds him.
(“What are you?” Steve says.
“I don’t k-know.” James looks at his hand, the sharp, curving claws, then at Steve again. “D-do you know? You made me.”)
Catfish /ˈkatˌfiSH/ - A catfish is someone who pretends to be someone they’re not using Facebook or other social media to create false identities, particularly to pursue deceptive online romances.
Steve Rogers is a famous movie star, known for his role as Captain America. Bucky Barnes is a bored law student who drinks too much wine. Bucky gets on match.com to boost his confidence. What he doesn’t expect is a guy using Steve Rogers’ pictures on a dating profile. Bucky decides to mess with the guy. After all, what idiot uses Steve Rogers’ pictures on a dating site?
Not like it’s really him, right? Bucky may need more wine.
Steve and Bucky write each other during the war. With more than your usual inclusion of spam & jam sandwiches, chickens, radar-evasion devices, Dum Dum Dugan’s hat, and that dumb lunkhead who plays Captain America. Who’s that, Steve? Oh, just some guy I work with.
Title is a reference, in part, to this scene from The First Avenger–
Bucky: Why are you so keen to fight? There are so many important jobs. Steve: What am I gonna do? Collect scrap metal… Bucky: Yes! Steve Rogers: …in my little red wagon. Bucky: Why not?
Bucky sometimes caught himself thinking, about the war: is all of this happening because old men saw the raw life in young men and wanted to squelch it? It was the same thing he had thought in school. Running track. When he had worked in the crew building the World’s Fair Railroad. And especially when he got his draft letter: they want to crush us like a piece of tin on train tracks.
Begins at Kreischberg prison camp, continues after the rescue.
“Can’t offer you much right now,” Rogers had said with a sad twist to his mouth, “but there’s an old cabin needs fixing up, you’re welcome to camp out there and do whatever you want with it.” He laughed. “Maybe you can even teach my boy to use a hammer.”
The pastor’s seventeen year old son Steve is the last thing Bucky expects. He’s got a smart mouth, a nose for trouble, and a habit of seducing members of the football team. Bucky didn’t think he was looking for anything, but Steve ’s got his own ideas about what Bucky needs.
Steve Rogers. I haven’t thought about him in…God, at least ten years. Probably longer.“ “Who is he?” Sharon asks, and perches on the corner of his desk, hands folded in her lap. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost.” Bucky clears his throat, tosses the sticky note onto the desk. “Steve was…my college boyfriend. We almost got married.”
It’s been fifteen years since Bucky Barnes left Steve Rogers standing in a New York airport and never saw him again. Those fifteen years have brought him wealth and stability; everything his lower middle class Brooklyn upbringing had not provided. He is happy. He doesn’t want for anything. He doesn’t need anything. That’s about to change.
Brooklyn 1918 to Brooklyn 2015: In which Steve questions his humanity, has a mid-twenties crisis (though he doesn’t call it that), makes friends, falls in love again, and slowly learns that he doesn’t need to live in the past to honour his memories.
This is a soulmates AU, written for bisexualstevenrogers to explore what this kind of universe would look like in the day-to-day—that is, the idea of soulmates against our actual world and histories—as well as what it might mean for someone like Steve or Bucky, who have had their bodies altered and subjected to someone else’s control. For them, I think, the idea of soulmates and soulmate tattoos—which direct you without your permission—can really highlight how much they struggle for their individuality and personal freedom (and to sort themselves out in the 21st-century).
barefootbucky: heyyy! sorry it took me so long to reply. hope you got the last few postcards i sent. ok so i’m in istanbul now and there’s a dirt cheap direct flight to dc. thinkin about stopping by for a bit. mind if i crash with you? the road is great and all but i think i need some time to recoup.
All Bucky wants is to get back to New York in time for his meeting, but his luck runs out when a blizzard traps him in D.C. It gets even worse when the guy looking like Bucky’s every dirty fantasy come to life catches him giggling at the erotic thrillers in the romance section of the airport bookstore.
Fury glared. “Fortunately, I am smart enough for the both of us and have created a narrow pathway of recovery. This option has a little bit of opportunity-cost, but I’m eighty-three percent sure that it’ll be worth it and it’ll work in the long run.” Nick paused, then amended, “Eighty-two percent.”
AKA A Fake Dating AU in which Steve and Bucky are famous.
The asset wears blue jeans, a t-shirt, a denim jacket. The asset wears one glove. The asset walks around the city. It feels as if it remembers something. It doesn’t know what it remembers. Perhaps it remembers everything.
After two days the insects crawling over the asset’s body become intolerable. The asset uses its metal arm to attempt to remove the insects from the meat arm. The results are not satisfactory.
“What the fuck are you doing, man?” says a pile of refuse.
Steve can’t help but be a little annoyed when Natasha signs him up for a cooking class - a couple’s cooking class. At least, he’s annoyed until he meets the instructor, who might just be the most attractive man Steve has ever laid eyes on.
Featuring chef!Bucky, bitterly single Steve, and their meddling friends.
Tired of being kept awake at night by a screaming baby, Bucky decides to take matters into his own hands. Mostly he wants a good night’s sleep, but what he gets is beautiful baby boy with big blue eyes, a lonely father trying to move on from tragedy, and a chance at a family he never expected to have.
Prompt: Oh god I live for Steve and Bucky acting like the 20somthing they are together, loving junk food, and doing stupid things (like the time they made a sex tape and mistakenly shared it with all the avengers… and by mistakenly I mean totally on purpose because Bucky’s probably a bit of an exhibitionist too, like “LOOK, LOOK AT MY BABYDOLL, ISN’T HE GORGEOUS? AND HE’S ALL MINE, NO YOU CAN’T HAVE HIM HAHAHA”)
Today, Peter was honest-to-god going to see Captain America himself up close, in person, and not from a rooftop or tiny crevice like a creepy stalker fanboy.
Even better, he was going to watch Steve Rogers make history by soldiering his beleaguered way through the most intensely awkward and honestly ridiculous press conference in the history of ever– jaw thrust out and spine ramrod straight. Trying hard to be polite and respectful in the face of adversity.
While a bunch of assholes with cameras and microphones shouted at him about Iron Man’s adolescent dick.
rated teen . 4k
Note: The entire series called “Workplace Hazards” was also submitted and can be found HERE on AO3.
Between Their Names by Sproings
What would a background check have turned up about Steven Grant Rogers?
Hopefully not the fact that Bucky could still remember the guy’s middle name. But certainly the fact that Steve and Bucky (and Jesus how their names still flowed together in his head) had spent three years living on the same street, going to the same school.
And now they were strangers.
AKA The one where Steve teaches a knitting class, and Bucky hides in a tree, and there’s a cat named Peepers
“This is a serious coup, James. Steve Rogers has never sat down with a member of the press and given an interview. Ever. Do you know how rare that is for the fourth-string star on a cable reality show, much less the biggest movie star in the world?”
Even below the layers of armor and muscle, Steve feels the bite of the cold. It’s not quite as intense or racking as it used to be back when his body was thin and offered little to protect him from the elements, but it’s present and pulling and unpleasant. It’s high on his list of immediate concerns, though not for himself. The numbness brings him back to the last time he was in Russia, 70 years earlier. But that was back when Bucky had been watching his back, alert and dependable, not glued to his front and immobile as he is now.
He’s finally found the ghost he’s been chasing. The question now is how does he bring him home?
“To be a Lead’s Support is a substantial responsibility,“ Natasha says. "You must be Agent Rogers’ personal assistant, bodyguard, chef, maid, best friend, boyfriend, and whatever else he wishes you to be.”
"What do I do?” Steve appealed into the phone. “I’m freaking out.”
There was silence on the other end of the line. It lasted so long that Steve pulled the receiver away from his ear and frowned at it. Pay phones were old. Maybe this one wasn’t working despite the obvious dial tone when he picked up.
“Ok,” a stranger’s voice said over the phone. “First acknowledge the fact that you dialed the wrong number, but be quick about it because my cab is a few blocks away from my own plans and I’m about to drop some truth bombs on you.”
rated teen . 6k
That’s it! It’s been a great year of amazing fics and I can’t wait until we are all overwhelmed with the feels and inspired to make even more Stucky fic in the coming new year and the release of Civil War. Huge kudos to the dedicated writers, many listed, and the thousands that aren’t - your fics have helped make 2015 a really good year.
Requested by anon: “can you write seventeen hogwarts au? Joshua is possible?”
everyone knew about Joshua Hong
the perfect perfect
he was a fifth year Hufflepuff
same house and year as you
so you saw him often as you both shared classes
it came as no surprise when he was chosen as a prefect
but he was surprisingly cool, letting minor things go if it didn’t endanger anyone or if it was for special occasions
especially if they were his friends, he just couldn’t say no to them
everyone’s favorite prefect because he was so nice and liked giving warnings rather than punishments
caught out past curfew by a few minutes,
he’d show you a secret passage to getting back to the dorms without running into teachers
if you passed him on the train, he’d stop to compliment you after asking you how your summer went
and no surprise he knew the lady pushing the trolley around on a first name basis
and asking her how her family was and everything
and complimenting her uniform
she always slipped him chocolate frog cards he didn’t have for his collection
and he’d thank her and buy out half the trolley before sharing it with all the kids in the next few carriages
Joshua was good at everything, smart and friendly too
not a single person could find something wrong with the guy or criticize him in any way
no matter what house someone was in, they new Joshua Hong
because the guy did everything
perfect exam scores in charms, potions, DATDA, transfiguration, herbology
you name it, Hong Jisoo did well in it
and he was so nice to everyone and a gentleman wherever he went
holding open doors to classrooms for people or picking up fallen quills or books that people dropped and returning it to them with a small smile
one time a girl accidentally set the quill she was writing with on fire from a wayward charm
Joshua had quickly extinguished it with aguamenti and gave her a new quill
suffice to say, plenty of witches had crushes on him
and no one could hate the guy for anything
literally, if you tried hating him, Joshua somehow managed to make you like him
disliked him for being too smart?
he’d say he wasn’t really smart, he just tries hard to study his best and he has smart friends who show him how to do stuff
and then talk about some random episode of spongebob bc it’s Joshua
which plenty of people wouldn’t understand except the other muggle borns
he’d be a huge dork quoting random episodes and just being a meme
everyone was always asking him for advice or to look over their homework for them
and although he never lets anyone copy his
goody two shoes you know
he somehow had the time to always give advice to everyone and save their grade
he played as a chaser for Hufflepuff’s Quidditch team too
it wasn’t enough to be intelligent, he was athletic and dedicated too
spending even stormy days out in the field practicing long after some of his teammates had called it quits
looked damn fine in quidditch robes too yes
in his third year, he had led the Hufflepuff team to victory
scored 30 points in the last minutes before their seeker finally caught the snitch, bringing the score to 270-300
he was every teacher’s favorite too
they couldn’t help it
he was always offering to help out teachers with anything they may need
although he didn’t sit in the front of any of his classes
and he was too quiet to raise his hand to answer any questions sometimes
if a teacher ever made the mistake of assuming Joshua wasn’t listening to the question
they got roasted as Joshua Hong not only got the question right, but probably corrected some error they made in their lecture earlier
which he would only point out in the most respectful and polite way
“Professor, did you mean to say aconite or monkshood instead of mandragora?“
and if no one knew the answer to a question
all Joshua needed was a glance from the teacher and he’d have the correct answer ready to go
the boy sang in chorus too
his voice was heavenly
some magical entity had to have graced Joshua with every goddamn talent in the universe
he supposedly played guitar amazingly well
only his dorm mates knew though, he always packed his guitar in his trunk somehow
and brought it out to play sometimes
it always surprised everyone when they found out he was muggle born
like he was too good at everything wtf how have you only been doing magic for a few years
but no one dared say anything about it
bc he had so many friends from all the houses
say something mean about Joshua or just something even remotely critical
and like five different people will interject saying how he’s basically a human unicorn
and how dare you call Shua anything but the perfect prefect
and he could easily beat anyone in a duel if his friends dragged him into one
and probably profusely apologize while bowing at ninety degrees and helping bandage and heal any injuries he may have caused
it was theorized he might have a time-turner
how else could he get all his papers done and still manage quidditch practice and chorus?
and also reorganizing textbooks in the library with his wand while the librarian recommended him books he hadn’t read before since he had read many of them
and helping the kitchen elves by explaining the concept of lactose intolerance and gluten free and other things that helped people with dietary restrictions and food allergies feel comfortable eating all food
he also helped an elf who once tripped over the recently mopped floor
Madam Pomfrey was always glowing about Shua bc he always brought students who were sick flowers and books to read and always gave her chocolates
he also was often seen consoling random paintings and ghosts in Hogwarts and he knew all of them by their first names
and while some people wanted to hate Joshua
he could say a few words and any negative feelings you had toward him were gone
“You really deserved that win, you guys have been practicing so hard lately on the quidditch field, good job!“
"How did you you come up with a way to start your potions paper so well? I should be asking you to edit mine."
"you have to show me that spell you did the other day with the lights and confetti, I want to use it for a friend’s birthday.”
“My owl? Oh his name is Flufferson, I have a picture do you want to see? He’s probably somewhere flying around, enjoying the fresh air, the cutie.”
“I have a puppy at home, it’s a Maltese and I named it Sebongie, I think it’s a cute name."
on weekends, you could probably see Joshua buying sugar quills for some third years who had forgotten their silver sickles or bronze knuts
or in the common room teaching kids how to use his iPhone to watch YouTube and anime
always with his group of friends from all the houses
his group of friends was big, 13 of them in all
his best friends were Jeonghan from slytherin and Seungcheol from Gryffindor since they were all the same age
one time, Jeonghan had tried to prank some Hufflepuff students by hexing their book bags into releasing a bunch of little rubber snakes
but he was caught by Joshua
and Joshua made him apologize
you don’t mess with Joshua’s kids
the next day Jeonghan’s clothes kept dropping rubber snakes everywhere
"SHUA YOU BETTER FIX MY CLOTHES I CANT WALK INTO POTIONS WITH THESE THINGS WORMING THROUGH MY UNDERWEAR”
Joshua would hide his laughter behind his hand and then compose himself
“That should actually keep you awake in potions then."
and everyone around them would be dying from laughter and patting Joshua on the back
for a gentleman the guy knew how to be savage sometimes
ofc as a fifth year in Hufflepuff you knew Joshua
you even sat pretty close to him in charms
and although you couldn’t hate the guy
it gets low key annoying when your friends always act like his biggest fan
"Shua’s practicing down at the quidditch field, GET THE SIGNS GIRLS!"
"We have a transfiguration exam y'all what are you doing?"
"Supporting our Hong Jisoo, y/n. The quidditch match is next weekend and we want to beat the slimy smiles off of those Slytherins’ faces."
one day in charms the professor had to assign a partner project
naturally everyone paired up
and you’re like chill I’ll just ask
you look around and all your friends are already paired up
and of course you’re like great forever alone that’s me I need to get me an even number of friends…
"Y/n do you need a partner?” Joshua asks you from the seat two students down from you
and everyone goes quiet
because Joshua usually always partners up with one of his friends
and you look to his normal friend group
and see sure enough all of them have partners too
“Sure, Joshua.” You say scrunching your nose
at least you’ll actually have a partner who tries and doesn’t make you do all the work by yourself (LIKE LAST TIME COUGH COUGH YOUR FRIEND)
you both decide to meet at the library the next weekend to work on it
“OMG y/n Joshua never asks anyone outside his friend group. What if he likes you?!?!? You guys would be such a power couple ACK."
"Shut up.” you laugh and playfully hit your friend’s arm while packing your book bag
“I’m not pretty enough for everyone’s golden gentleman Joshua, he was just being nice because you all ditched me."
"I’m glad we did, make me the maid of honor at your wedding and thank me later."
when you reach the library, Joshua is already there talking to Jeonghan
"The girl in your charms class? Well whatever we can hang out next weekend. But Shua that assignment isn’t due in weeks… makes sense the both of you are smart aleks."
you clear your throat
"welp bye Joshua, oh and we’re all getting butter beer later at hogsmeade don’t forget."
Joshua laughs and waves Jeonghan goodbye
"it’s a nice day, should we sit out by the lake and say hi to the giant squid?"
"sure I guess"
you didn’t want to have a crush on Joshua
bc then you’d be one of those girls, the ones always trailing behind him and trying to get his attention
and walking by fluttering their eyelashes and saying "Hey Joshua."
but as you were both crossing the grounds to the lake
you kept giving him sideways glances
the way his light brown hair became lightly tousled in the breeze
- or his small smile
or the gentle humming of a song you weren’t familiar with
Focus you’re working on an assignment geez
you both sat down at the edge of the lake and brainstormed ideas for your project
and somewhere along the way the convo shifted to just talking about summer and your home
"You’re muggle born too? Then have you ever watched Naruto?"
Joshua was a dork you realized, a cute one
"Sebongie? Yea I miss her like crazy, I was tempted to bring her in my trunk but I have Flufferson already."
you were starting to like like Joshua
he was too nice and cute especially when talking about his pets and how they brightened his day
or the many hilarious adventures he had with his friends
or how he missed his family
he was a good listener too
you talked about your hamster at home
it loved eating carrots and you had originally wanted to name it mochi
but you had settled for Carrot after it’s favorite food
and you told Joshua about how you had always loved playing quidditch with your family but you never tried out for the Hufflepuff team
his friends must have caught on to your feelings before Joshua did, Joshua was kind of clueless about all the crushes people had on him
Jeonghan ended up putting his arm on your shoulder while walking to the library to meet up with Joshua
"You should just tell him you like him."
"and get a pity rejection, lmao in what world would I do that Jeonghan.”
“Suit yourself.” He said giving you a sly smile
right before shoving you into a broom closet
and locking the damn door behind you
“JEONGHAN YOU’RE DEAD YOU HEAR ME."
"You should thank your friend later, she told me about your little crush on our Shua, luckily for you I approve."
you tried unlocking the door with your wand but to no avail
you even tried picking the lock with a hairpin
"Hey y/n listen to this."
"Jeonghan I’m telling the head of slytherin later get ready for your ass whooping."
but you hear someone running down the hallway outside the door
"Jeonghan what do you mean y/n got in an accident? Where is she?"
you go dead silent, it’s Joshua
"Yah, look you came running and everything if you like her just tell her geez."
you hold your breath as you hear what Joshua says next
"She probably doesn’t like me back ok? I’m not good at these things, she’s cute and interesting and I’m boring and I don’t know ok Jeonghan, just tell me where she is no time for jokes we have to work on the project.”
“alright, I’d like to just say that you brought this upon yourself and you can thank me later."
"what are you talking about Jeonghan-"
and the closet door clicks open and Jeonghan pushes Joshua, where he bumps into you sending the both of you sprawling on the floor and the door slams shut yet again
"THIS IS FOR THOSE SNAKES SHUA I ALWAYS GET THE LAST LAUGH. See you two later…"
Joshua picks himself up and helps you up
and even in the dim closet you can see him blushing like crazy
you’re probably no better you feel like you have a fever that won’t. go. away. Goddamnit.
"Jeonghan underestimates me.” He said giving a nervous chuckle and reaching for his wand
he easily unlocks the door
and Jeonghan is out there bending over dying of laughter
and both you and Joshua are just blushing like crazy and awkwardly standing next to each other
“Did you hear everything?” Joshua says so quietly it’s almost a whisper
- “yes?” You say
Joshua’s eyes widen and he gives Jeonghan (who’s still laughing even harder now at the sight of the two of you) a glare
Joshua points his wand at Jeonghan LIKE boi I’ll be seeing you later
- Jeonghan runs away cackling down the hallway
“You can just pretend it didn’t happen.” Joshua says flustered looking everywhere but your face
“I’ll understand if you don’t like me ba-"
"It was driving me crazy did you really not know I like you too Joshua?” Wow did I just say that, stupid stupid stupid whyyyyy you think to yourself
he looks up at you in surprise
“Wait really? Jeonghan isn’t paying you to say that right?"
"lmao no I’m going to murder Jeonghan after this."
"I’d help you but he’s my best friend so…"
"Do you want to maybe just get a butter beer at Hogsmeade instead?"
"I’d love to."
and from then on you two were known as darling couple
Hogwarts’ gentleman Joshua and you
basically everyone’s relationship goals
and your friend groups both took responsibility for getting you two together
Joshua would send you little notes that were folded into cranes and bewitched to float over to your desk
and everyone would sigh and think how sickeningly adorable seeing you read his message
and looking at all the little hearts he had doodled during class
"Joshua Hong, let me repeat the question.” The professor would say
“I never usually have to ask you twice what’s wrong?"
"Joshua got a girlfriend, professor."
and the whole class would burst out laughing with you and Joshua blushing like crazy and his friends wolf whistling
you’d walk with each other to your next class with your hand in his
"Get a room Shua, no one needs to see this.” Jeonghan smirked as he walked towards the potions classroom in the dungeons
- you and Joshua both just ignore him
“Let’s hex his clothes again with those snakes."
"Better yet, can we lock him in a broom closet?"
and you both walk into your next class, plotting Jeonghan’s imminent doom together
With one semester under my belt and a so far unblemished GPA, here’s a list of everything I wish I had known before I started college (plus some stuff I figured out along the way):
1. Read the syllabus for your class and then go one step further: pick assignments that you can do ahead of time, like readings, and then actually do them. At least at my university you hit a point about a month or so into school where all of the sudden you have no free time. Earlier on you’re going to have some slow weekends. I’m not saying do it all at once, but if you take away some easy but time consuming assignments earlier the whole semester will feel a little smoother. Important though: You still have to review your notes/work when relevant or you’ll be screwed later on.
2. The first like two weeks of school as a freshman you are shuttled through dozens of social events, infofairs, and mixers. You may find that you make a lot of friends at first, but then once that one month marker passes you look up from your textbooks and realize you haven’t spoken to another human outside of classes in days. Try to have at least one recurring social thing going on, whether that’s meeting friends for dinner once a week, going to a club meeting or a study group.
3. Don’t be ashamed to ask for help. Like seriously, if something is just not making sense, you need to get another person involved. Sometimes studying alone and Google only go so far! Office hours are good and so is tutoring. Ask classmates too if you can. I really hated my chem lab, and there was one lab where the data we got basically defied the laws of physics. I ran into someone from my lab section on the street and vented about it- turns out she had the same problem, but more importantly, she knew what caused it! My lab report was still pretty bad due to the nonsensical data, but I had a coherent answer when it came time to explain error.
4. Go to class, participate, and be nice to your professors. If they host optional reviews, definitely go to them. Depending on the prof’s style, you may be able to just sit and listen or they may expect you to bring questions. Have at least one just in case. The reason why this matters (besides networking and engaging in active learning) is that a lot of professors make a component of your grade “participation”. I had a course where I was borderline between an A minus and and A, which could have dinged my GPA. My grade basically was going to come down to a rewrite of a paper. I went to a not very well attended test review and got extra hints about what was going to be on the test and what the professor was looking for, which boosted my final test grade, and though I can’t prove it I strongly suspect my professor used my participation grade to nudge me over the edge to an A.
5. This wasn’t one I learned, but one I realized other people didn’t know: your school very likely pays a crap ton of money to give you access to academic research databases through the library. Use them, oh my god, please use them. For one thing, I’ve found it’s just plain easier than attempting to do regular research- you get lots of good, relevant, generally sound information; you can sort in cool ways (like if you don’t want outdated research you can set parameters for the time of publication); and most have pre-made citations! It’s cool! Even if you don’t have a research project/paper just go on once and dick around a bit, it’s pretty fun. That being said, if you are assigned a project requiring research and citations, don’t do what you did in high school and cite a bunch of news articles about scientific advancements or the results of studies. Go find original sources. You need to learn how to read published research in any case. (I’m speaking from a STEM major perspective but these databases have tons of cool stuff for arts and humanities students too- entire books, anthologies of art, images for use, music files, recordings of plays and performances, etc). But the reason I bring this up- in a group project in a communications course a well-intentioned teammate brought us a random person’s blog post about conflict in the workplace to cite in our speech. She had no idea she had access to like thousands of psychological and sociological research papers, books, etc. on the subject. Another student in that class orally cited a buzzfeed article about procrastination- unless you have a really good reason (like maybe you’re a communications student analyzing listicle style writing or the influence of social media on journalism) please don’t cite buzzfeed.
6. People talk a lot about networking, so I’ll just mention one specific and easy way to do it even if you’re not super outgoing: join a club or organization related to your major/career field. You will meet people who have experiences you can learn from, even if you may compete with them for some things (maybe they tip you off to an internship they had last summer or to a professor’s favorite snack/hobby). You will also potentially meet some staff members from your department who can give you info about research/internships and possibly write you rec letters. This worked for me- I joined an org for students pursuing teaching, I’m one of a few freshman (maybe the only one actually) who attends regularly, and I ended up getting to know the director of the supply room who does the hiring for student interns. Now I have a job as a workroom intern to make some extra money during school. More importantly, it basically lets me meet and work with the whole department who can potentially open up opportunities for me. (Plus according to one intern sometimes you get invited to the staff Christmas party and all the professors get sloshed).
7. Wait to buy your textbooks, but not too long. If it’s a niche book (i.e. your school uses something written by your professor that no one else sells or cares about) there will come a point where they are out of copies and you will have to ask to photocopy someone’s lab notebook every week. Basically, wait until the first day of class, determine what you really need, ask someone who’s taken it before (or ask on your University’s subreddit) whether the book is essential, then make your purchases. Also! If you have to purchase an online access code for homework stuff, check if an online textbook is included. Don’t buy a hard copy in addition to it. It’s not worth it and you may even be able to check a textbook out from the library for that one time you’ll actually read the textbook. (When I say that, I mean you can read it for a few hours in the library- they won’t let you leave with it).
8. Don’t go into any class believing you are “bad” at a subject. I used to say all the time that I hated math and I was bad at it. I really lucked out, because I ended up enjoying Diff Calc this past semester. Because I liked it, I was willing to practice more and I found that I got less frustrated when things were hard. I realized that “being bad at math” was a lie I had told myself, basically, and it wasn’t helpful. Learn to treat your brain as a tool or a muscle. You can learn to do basically anything with enough time and effort, and struggling with something doesn’t mean you’re “bad” at it. It just means you’re working out your brain. I know that sounds corny as hell but it’s true. Having the idea that your intelligence is fixed and limited stunts learning and just makes you feel like crap. Realizing that your intelligence is fluid helps you be kinder to yourself, ask for help when you need it, and lets you focus on accomplishments over failures.
My askbox is always open if people have questions about the transition to college!
These are all inspired from things I’ve either experienced or witnessed during my first two years at college.
We’re in the same class and our professor always writes insanely hard tests. I don’t care how hot you are, the only textbook in the library is mine!
I got my days mixed up and went to class an hour early. Then, I accidentally walked in on your class and interrupted your super important presentation. I’m incredibly sorry and tried to apologize after your class let out.
My drunk friend pounded on your door, screaming for his roommates to let him in thinking it was his room. I was the one dragging him back and–oh god, he just puked on your shoes! I’m so sorry!
My friends and I decided to go climbing the trees around campus. At night. They thought I left early, but I got stuck and please, please help… you’re the first person I’ve seen in hours and I really hate heights now.
What the fuck are you doing in my seat? It’s three weeks into class, I know you know that’s my seat, you sat behind me– oh shit, you’re hot.
You borrowed my favorite pen last class and never gave it back. I want my damn pen back, you bastard.
We randomly got paired up for beer pong at a party and holy shit, we’re amazing. Beer pong partners for life?
What the hell are you cooking– it’s 3 in the morning and people down the hall are gagging from the smell of chili peppers and death. Go to Taco Bell like a normal person!
I went out for a walk and saw you kicking a bike angrily. Someone locked their chain around your bike? Uh, this is kinda random, but I have a hacksaw in my room. If you’d like to borrow it, feel free.
We’re both on the same sports team and I’m the only one qualified as an EMT. Look, I’m sorry, but you’ve definitely got a concussion! If you’d stop trying to make a break for the field, I’d stop sitting on you. In the mean time, put this ice pack on your head.
Thank you, random person from the lounge above us! I totally forgot that the crit range is 16-20, not 18. You just saved us from a TPK. Hey, do you wanna join our campaign, we literally just started.
I’m trying to study for my first big exam and you’re that asshole in the lounge with the guitar. If you play wonder wall one more time, I’m going to break your guitar over your head, you douchey hipster.
I’m a barista at the campus coffee shop and you’re sitting in front of the fire extinguisher. Can you toss it to me? The coffee machine’s on fire again. Nah, don’t worry, this happens a lot.
I was leading a tour of campus for prospective students and you hit me with your goddamn longboard. I swear to god, if i didn’t have to be polite, I’d fucking beat you into the pavement, but hang on… you’re actually really sorry about it. Why do you have Hello Kitty bandaids in your backpack..?
We’ve never met before but we share a mutual friend who wanted to go see a musical. The musical was shit, but we all went on a late night adventure and wow, you’re actually really cool to talk to. Holy shit, it’s 6 am.
My friends and I are pulling an all-nighter in the library and we just stocked up on snacks. You’re at the study table next to us and look super dead and stressed– do you want my extra Red Bull?
You’re some kind of super genius, we get it. Now quit flying your goddamn drone around campus or I’ll knock it out of the sky with my frisbee.
We’re on the same intramural sports team and our team is literally the worst– you and I are carrying the team and we bitch about it after games.
My audition for the top wind ensemble is tomorrow and I don’t care if I have to strangle you with your own bow, I /need/ this practice room.
Of all the things you decided to steal from the dining hall, why a pineapple?
I’m on the girls water polo team and so are you… even though you’re obviously a dude. How is this a thing? Oh yeah, Title IX.
I’m babysitting my friend at a party and you’re one of the frat guys hosting it. For some reason, when you get drunk you start quoting Beowulf and old black and white films. It’s actually kind of adorable, even if you are a total dude-bro.
My friend took me to a house party and now everyone’s drunk as fuck. I wanted to use the bathroom, but I walked in on you stealing all of their toilet paper. What the hell?
We’re both super drunk and stumbling back to our dorms from a party–AND HOLY SHIT THATS A COP JUST ACT NATURAL. FUCKING SHIT HUGGING A SIGN POST ISN’T NATURAL.
It’s Halloween and we’re both chilling on the quad, checking out girls. Damn, that’s a very creative slutty ninja.
I got out of my night lab class and I just saw you chasing after a stray cat, screaming “KITTY.” Okay then…