testing stuff here


“Hunk, he knows my name. Shiro knows my name!”

“Pretty sure that’s because he saw you start a food fight in the mess hall with Keith and he stopped you two before you could drag other people in it. You both got detention for that, remember?”

or: Lance have been pining after his hero for quite a while now and is having a hard time keeping his crush a secret especially after Shiro called him by his name for the first time.

Buddy, repeatedly spamming me to ask for fanfic updates to the point where I have to remove 14 comments of your comments off of a fic within an hour—the final one demanding I “quit being a dick” and “just orphan the work already so someone capable and dedicated can finish it”—is one of the surefire ways to make sure I never update ever again and refuse to orphan any of it out of sheer visceral spite.

I’ll leave the whole body of work hanging there forever as an epitaph to the behavior of shitty people who killed my motivation to ever write free fun stuff for fandom ever again. And when Ao3 finally dies and we move on to somewhere else, I’ll copy paste the entire unfinished work and upload it, just for you.

How’s that for dedication.

careful, she bites


a series of unlikely crossovers

scorbus hcs - youtuber au (kinda)
  • Albus had just turned 20, was in his second year of the curse-breaker program, and was top of his class
  • he was also publicly know as the Slytherin son of the Hero of the Wizarding World (he didn’t like that title much tbqh)
  • and he liked wizternet, a global system that connected wizarding computers and was obviously based off muggle’s internet
  • he specially liked watching videos on both muggle’s youtube and wizards’ youfloo
  • one day, after he watched a video of his cousin Fred talk about wizarding life in Russia (he was travelling around the world, the lucky git), youfloo recommended a video titled “SCORPION KING BURNS THE HOUSE”
  • on the thumbnail there was a blond guy who wore silver-wired glasses and a turquoise jacket next to a dark-skinned girl with short hair who looked oddly familiar
  • he decided to watch the video
  • it was so funny, the girl (Alex Zabini, Albus recognised, daughter of Blaise Zabini and Albus’s godfather, Neville Longbottom) was talkiing about how Scorpius had tried to bake a cake for his father’s 46th birthday and ended up almost burning the house. Scorpius was pouty throughout the video, but he couldn’t help and laugh at some remarkable points.
  • Albus decided to subscribe to Scorpius’s channel
  • he had to admit the boy was so damn cute, with his crooked smile and silver glasses and septum piercing. his wavy and white-blondish hair, the freckles on his nose and cheeks. and his french accent.
  • Albus wondered if his godfather would think it weird for him to visit out of the blur. He also wondered if Alex and Lily were still good friends.
  • then he decided to let it go bc there was no chance he would ever get to date Scorpius, even if he was also gay (Albus knew that bc he had seen all of his videos, including his coming out one), that didn’t mean he would be interested in Albus.
  • almost two months after he found out Scorpius’s channel, Albus met him
  • he had just left Gringotts and decided to look up some books on Flourish and Blotts
  • arriving there he found his father arguing heatedly with a blond man around his age
  • from what Albus could hear, it was a discussion about cooking methods.
  • old people, he sighed before getting closer to his dad
  • “dad?” he said and as Harry turned to him, his expression softened.
  • “Al!” he hugged his son, “good to see you here,” he said before turning back to the man he was arguing with, he frowned for a moment before reluctantly saying, “this is Draco Malfoy,”
  • “Albus Potter,” Albus said, offering his hand for a shake.
  • Draco Malfoy looked at it, then at Potter, then at Albus, and shook it.
  • two piles of books came floating towards them
  • “dad, I think I have all the books I need, and I also picked some more because, well, you know how I am with books”
  • Albus almost shivered when he heard that voice
  • Scorpius Malfoy appeared from behind the book piles and opened his mouth to say something again when he realised his father wasn’t alone.
  • “Scorpius,” mr. Malfoy said, “this is Harry Potter,” he nodded in Harry’s direction, “and Albus Potter, his son”
  • Scorpius smiled happily and shook both Potter’s hands, lingering a bit at Albus’s.
  • “Nice to meet you,” he said and Albus bit his lip to stop himself from saying something stupid, like, I’ve seen all your videos or I like the way your hand feels against mine
  • to stop himself from ogling Scorpius, Albus looked around and focused himself on the books Scorpius was going to buy
  • they were mostly about science and technology, but there was a m/m romance in there too
  • “you like that?” he heard Scorpius ask next to him and he thanked his self-control for not jumping.
  • “seems good,” he said mildly, his mind now focused on the fact that Scorpius smelled like honey and something citric
  • “mhm,” Scorpius hummed, “our parents are having a staring contest right now,” he muttered in Albus’s ear, his voice sounding amused
  • Albus closed his eyes and turned to face the two men who were almost on their 50s act like they were first years.
  • “unbelievable,” he shook his head, “dad is usually nice when he meets old classmates, I guess him and your father must have a heavy history”
  • Albus turned to Scorpius then, to find out their faces were only inches apart.
  • “must be it,” Scorpius said and for a moment Albus stared at his lips, feeling his throat dry up.
  • “do you wanna grab a drink?” Scorpius asked
  • Albus swallowed and licked his lips before nodding.
  • “Sure, now?”
  • Scorpius glanced at mr. Malfoy and Harry, who were now arguing again.
  • “Now sounds good,” Scorpius smiled shyly at him. “Lead the way,”
  • Albus put his hands in his pockets and they walked side by side to the pub a few blocks away.
  • months later Albus would talk about how he found Scorpius’s channel and was instantly enchanted with him, and Scorpius would talk about a Daily Prophet article he read right after moving to London that featured the picture of the cutest wizard he had ever laid eyes on
  • they’d make videos together and be very loving and gay for all wizarding world to see.