Instructions on how to use the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch
  1. And the Lord spake, saying, First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin.
  2. Then, shalt thou count to three, no more, no less.
  3. Three shalt be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shalt be three.
  4. Four shalt thou not count, nor either count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three.
  5. Five is right out.
  6. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who being naughty in my sight, shall snuf it.

misskerryberry  asked:

Weird question but I'm curious, what was your life like when you were 23? Were you writing and creating things or like bumping into things/confusion/lots of fast food?

I was living in a tiny rented room in Edgware, doing interviews and reviewing books to eat, selling my first short stories (two in that year, I think), and writing my first two books (Ghastly Beyond Belief and the Duran Duran biography). My personal life was a confused mess, and I couldn’t afford fast food ( I survived mostly on the kind of casseroles you make by pouring some water, a can of beans and a can of tuna into a casserole dish filled with dry noodles, stirring it up, putting it into the oven and then eating it for the next several days, and on the food they served at press film screenings to put you in a good mood for the film to come.)

Here is a photo of me aged 23 having my head squashed by Monty Python’s Terry Jones, whom I was interviewing. Note that I am still holding on to my mini-cassette recording device. (Also note the Brian Froud drawing pinned up behind him: he was writing the script for Labyrinth at the time.)