teradactol

»508863056
finally. it’s only highschool, ffs.

>be me, 4th grade social outcast
>really into dinosaurs, collected a shitload of dinosaur books and figures
>during recess, would always pretend to be a dinosaur
>would make a peace sign with fingers curved, looked like a claw
>would make hissing sounds to replicate raptor noises
>chase around random girls on the playground, acting like a raptor
well, one motherfucking day
>chasing girls around, pick out this qt3.14
>chase her, she playfully screams and runs away laughing
>do this for about 5min
>girl’s boyfriend thought i was bullying her, or being mean
>comes over to me, and asks me why im being mean to his girl
keep in mind this was the 4th motherfucking grade
>runs up and pushes me down
>SCREEEEEEEEEE (my raptor yell)
>stand back up and like charge at him, head down
>hit him in the gut, knocks him down
>SCREEEEEEEEE
>stand over him, claw at him with my “talons”
this did practically nothing but hurt a little maybe
>snap a couple times
>SCREEEEEEEEEEE
>bend down over him, and literally bite his fucking cheek as hard as I could
>leave blood marks and he screams in pain
>SCRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>he turns on his right side, hand over his cheek
>see his ear
>bite the shit out of it, rip off a small chunk
REEEYAAAAAAAAAAAA
>teacher pulls me off
>escorts me to the office, calls the police and ambulance for the kid
>im sitting here walking through the office like a badass dinosaur
>got to the office
>teacher told me im probably going to be going away for a long time
>she opens the door, didn’t get on the floor, but literally walked the dinosaur

just kidding

>takes me in
>get charges
>parents pay a couple thousand for hospital bills
>had to see a psych until like 16
>kid moved away
from then on I was known as Mike Tyson the Dangerous Velociraptor
Credit to 4chan