I bought these temporary tatoos from @motivationaltattoos a while ago, not knowing for sure if I would ever need them, but feeling quite reassured to just have them around.
This Sunday is Fathers’ Day in Belgium, and a sense of dread has been filling me up for the last couple of days. My mum left him last September, and since then, he has made a point of not answering texts and pretending we’re not his children because we supported her.
I spent most my childhood and teenagehood doing my best to please him and be the perfect daughter (aka be a son instead). I always felt like I was never good enough. He seemed to never be proud of me. He abused us psychologically, and seemed to despise everything we liked.
I want to have a relationship with my father, I really do. But nobody should make me feel like crap or make me believe I’m not worth loving or even caring about. So I’ve been trying to figure out wether or not I should reach out to him this Sunday. It made me physically sick, made me so angry I snapped at my companion and students, and I basically stopped sleeping and taking care of myself.
The tatoo soothed me to a point I can’t even begin to explain. I’m so grateful for the calmness it brought me, even if it didn’t solve my issue. Thanks a lot @motivationaltattoos <3 <3 <3