temple of the sideburn

The Exchange

This one is for my darling Heather, @jalove-wecallhimdean. Congrats on your 500 my sweet, i envy those lucky buggers that get to discover you for the first time. But at the same time, I am so glad I was there for the beginning of your posting!
Also, THANK YOU to Jenn for being an brilliant beta. @avasmommy224 couldn’t have posted without you soothing my worried mind!

Prompt: “You full on had a girl inside you for like a whole week”
Warning: Body Swap, swearing, attempted humor, rejection, fluff, confusion, masturbation, hinted smut…?
Characters: Reader, Dean, Sam
Word Count: 5264 (kinda got away from me)
Summary: A nasty curse from a Warlock leaves you and Dean scratching each others heads and Sam mighty confused…

Originally posted by lexarakoon

That fucking warlock. Oh man, had he been a hard one to put down! It had taken all week. Spells were cast, spells were undone. Hex bags were planted, hex bags were burnt. It’d been physically wearing too, being thrown from one bloody wall to another. Christ, this guy just had a hard on for bodies slapping against plaster.
I groaned and rolled onto my back, not opening my eyes just yet, today could wait. I lay there for a while before stretching, and it was a bloody good stretch too; leg shaking, arm tingling, back cracking, good. I yawned wide, cracking my dry lips. I licked at it, feeling the swell of a bigger cut. I don’t remember splitting my lip. I push that thought from my mind and dig the heels of my palms into my eyes, grinding out the sleep and yawning again, but I stop, surprised, halfway through. My fingers have rested on my hair, what should be my long hair; but it’s short and spiky and …

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anonymous asked:

so how it is your list ? most to least favorite on exo? who are your sons? in which place was kaikai before? who is jongdae? so many questions...

I like them all they just go in groups

Top 2 is obviously Chen (Jongdae) and Xiumin (Minseok)

My sons are Kyungsoo (D.O) and Yixing (Lay)

and my precious little dumb sheep boy is Suho (Junmyeon)

and everyone else in exo are just in the group after these kids mentioned above.. kaikai used to be in this group but then after Japan concert I almost wanted to adopt him and make him my 3rd son so he is somewhere in the son zone LMAO

and I’m sorry did I read this right? WHO IS JONGDAE??

What is a Kim Jongdae you say??

I mean my whole blog is pretty much Kim Jongdae and my icon has his face on a ferrero rocher chocolate.. but trust me I don’t know what is a kim Jongdae either

Kim Jongdae.. Kim daedae.. Kim chenchen … Kim Kittydae.. Kim pikachen is the world’s most precious piece of shit ever..Let me introduce you to my ultimate little shit ….. I AM SORRY IT WILL BE A LONG POST

His smile/laugh can bring world peace (click here to be healed)

His singing will heal you too…. before you scroll through the pictures.. just go to my chenaudio tag for his singing.. laughing and also the weird noises and sounds he makes. TRUST ME.. YOU NEED THEM IN YOUR LIFE

He is a kitty because of his lip curl

he is pikachu because his power in exo is thunder/lightning and his lip curl is same as pikachu’s 

(Insert my own pikachu plushie from Japan lol .. yes I went to pokemon centre >.> no shame)

His eyelashes are so long and curly.. it makes me jealous and I want to put mascara on him

and also we need to talk about his moles.. they are like constellations or something lmao.. I’ll just focus on the moles on his face down to collarbone.. body moles shall not be discussed 

from what I remember.. on the right side of his face. there is a straight line of four moles browbone to temple? .. and then I think there are some (2?) hidden in his right sideburn…. one on his right earlobe and one on right jawline/neck… and then we move down to my fave moleee.. THE COLLARBONE ONE.. which i call it the sekshi mole (I have a tag for it)

and then on the left side of his face… there are 2 near his temple area? and then one pretty noticeable one in his sidburn area… and then there is one right underneath the arch of his left eyebrow… and that zit looking thing (i still call it a mole lol) at the beginning part of his left eyebrow… (WOW this did not sound creepy at all.. nope.. WOW I AM TRASH )

and lmao lookie I found a pic that shows most of the moles I mentioned above

AND ALSO HIS STRAIGHT ASS EYEBROWS… IT IS BEAUTIFUL.. IT HAS A LIFE OF ITS OWN.. YOU SHOULD SEE THAT THING MOVE WHEN HE SINGS

some jfan or program? measured his eyebrow tilt lmao

HIS SIDE PROFILE.. his jawline… his forehead.. his *u* HE IS BEAUTIFUL

I think Jongdae srsly gives the best and warmest hugs he snuggles(?) his head into your shoulder when he hugs 

and his facial expressions……i love his face

He is cute and precious and fluffy most of the time.. but sometimes he can be a rude piece of………… oh and did I mention HE CANNOT CONTROL HIS FUCKING TONGUE??? (pls just look at my chentongue tag) 

and let me also introduce you to the Chooty and the thunder guns

and look at this quality footage of his pants flossing his asscrack

Thunder guns =)

I FEEL EXHAUSTED AND I DON’T WANT TO FREEZE EVERYONE’S DASH.. I WILL END THE POST WITH THUNDER GUNS AND CHOOTY.. please just go to my tags page for all the fucking tags I have for Kim Jongdae… i have over 25 at least ………. and there are more but I didn’t include most likely i honestly don’t even know how many tags I have for him… i gave up… i lost track

You give love a bad name

Originally posted by itsdeanwinchesterr

Prompt: for @deanwinchester-af‘s 25 songs challenge! I chose You Give Love A Bad Name by Bon Jovi, couldn’t help myself! It’s a celebration for her reaching 2.5k followers, you deserve them all love!

Pairing: Dean x reader

Word count: 1299

Warnings: reader is a bitch and hurts Dean, that’s about it! A lot of teasing too

Authors note: thanks to my main girl @whywhydoyouwantmetosaymyname for beta reading this first and for your continued support! I really appreciate it! Sorry for the lack of posting, I had writers block! As always gif used isn’t mine and I really hope you enjoy it! I decided to switch it up a bit and it’s written from Dean’s POV. 

Tagged: @xxtaylorsingerxx @diesintheshower @aprofoundbondwithdean @gabby913 @marksthatsignify-her-fromtherest @imnotlikeyou0214 @my-name-is-alice-ayers @loveitsallineed @queensdontwaittobesaved @bowties-scarves-and-impalas @sushidoesntneedtoknow

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