tellywood

anonymous asked:

Have you watched any mythological shows??

Hi anon!

Nope. They come under the umbrella of things of tellywood things that give me michmichi - bad styling of the men (78% of the reason I’m tolerating a tellywood show is usually for an attractive man…), bad vfx, overly shuddh hindi, too much beating over the head with the religious/sanskaar stuff, etc. Not a fan of all that stuff at all. Plus, I mostly know the plot that’s coming up, thus killing the excitement to watch.

I prefer modern adaptations of the myths: e.g. Saarthi for the Mahabharata. 😌 (I wish more makers did modern/alternate universe adaptations of established myths! There’s so much potential!)

Guide to Every Indian Drama Ever

1. A humble heroine with big dreams

.. and a filthy rich hero with an attitude problem

2. Heroine has a strange disorder where she keeps falling on the hero

3. Magically transport to a forest, where the couple plays a game of Survivor

4. Right when it heats up, introduce the “vamp” (aka hero’s superslutty girlfriend)

5. Couple has huge misunderstandings, which could be resolved with a 5 minute convo

6. In a strange turn of events, hero force-marries heroine 

7. There must be an absurdly long drawn-out wait until the consummation

9. Throw in an an evil mom/grandma/ex/random twat to separate them

9. When the couple finally gets down to bizness … bam! heroine becomes pregnant the very next day

10. Actor becomes popular and gets the hell outta the show

11. Director tries to pass off a random guy as the hero

12. Show dies a slow, but swift death

8

#ProgressiveRudy

4

‘Safed chutney’ nahin, white sauce.

Hamari saas bohat gori hai, humein pata hai.

7

“Kuch nahin hone dunga main.”
“Nahin hoga na?”