Ese momento en que crees haber presenciado el primer delito de robo de una niñita de un teeny beanie baby. Y la madre histérica al saber que ese muñequito con el cual ella no fue a las tiendas y ahora posa en sus pequeñas e “inocentes” manitas fue definitivamente robado.
How on earth do you find the energy to put up with such mind-numbingly stupid children?
In my life, I’ve worked at a McDonald’s (thankfully, I was only 14 at the time, so I was only allowed to cashier. Unfortunately, it was during that time period where “teeny beanie babies” were still popular), a music store located in a mall, a Toys ‘R Us, a sporting goods store, and I managed three departments at a Hobby Lobby.
I have dealt with WASP trophy wives and soccer moms that cannot handle the idea that a store can run out of what they drove 30 miles to get for their daughter without bothering to call about it ahead of time.
I have been inside of more than one animal mascot costume, and forced to perform in it like a trained chimpanzee for packs of screaming children that think it’s funny to kick said mascot.
I have dealt with elderly women with zero comprehension of store signage who insist that the sale on one item along a shelf applies to everything on the shelf.
I have dealt with curmudgeonly old men who refused to believe that I knew anything about products I not only studied as a job requirement and ordered by hand every week, but even used myself at home.
I have seen the worst of humanity.
I have been classically trained by the soul-crushing world of retail to not lose my shit at the worst of humanity.
I have mastered the ancient art of being able to retain my composure while being irrationally screamed and cursed at by people who think they know better about things that I’ve actually had to learn out of necessity.
Suggested to the McDonald’s drive-through worker to not refer to the Happy Meal toys as “boy” or “girl.” Girls can like Mario Kart, and I distinctly remember lots of boys losing their minds over Teenie Beanie Babies in the 90s.