teen abusive relationships

It’s hard to leave someone when you’re still in love with them but they’re hurting you, and you know it’s what you have to do.
—  D.N. // excerpt from a book i’ll never write #42

“If stiles was a girl sterek would already be canon” if stiles was a girl and sterek was canon everyone would be outraged and would probably get teen wolf cancelled over the fact that derek pushed her against a wall and slammed her head against a steering wheel instead of romantizing their scenes together and shipping them, you dipshit.

I want to scream until my lungs hurt, scream, ‘No!’, scream, ‘This isn’t how I deserve to be treated!’, but I’ll just whisper, 'I love you too.’
—  I wish I could stand up for myself

…because I love you…

I think my friend is in an abusive relationship. What can I do?

Someone asked us:

I have a friend who I think is stuck in an abusive relationship but doesn’t realize it yet. How can I try to help her? Without alienating her or making it seem like I’m attacking him?

If your friend isn’t being treated with respect, is being controlled, or is living under the threat of violence, her relationship is unhealthy and abusive. A friend like you can be a lifesaver.

It can be hard to realize that you’re in an unhealthy or abusive relationship, and even harder to admit it.  But don’t let that stop you from telling your friend that you’re concerned about her.

Listen and be supportive. When she talks about bad things in her relationship, tell her she deserves to be happy and validate her feelings. Remind her why she’s great and deserves love and respect in a relationship. Do things she likes to do to show her what it’s like to be around someone who supports and loves her. It’s a good sign of your friendship that she’s already told you some of what’s going on. If she opens up to you again about abusive or unhealthy behavior, remind her that what’s going on is not her fault, and that no one deserves to be treated that way in a relationship.

You don’t need to “attack” her partner. In fact, it’s better to keep the focus on your friend as much as possible. It’s super important that she still feels okay talking to you about it, and that she doesn’t feel judged by you if she’s not ready to break it off.

If your friend chooses to break up with her abuser, she may need to come up with a safety plan. You can help her with that.

Be prepared for your friend to not break up with him right away, or for them to break up and get back together again. It can be hard to leave any romantic relationship behind — even the harmful ones. It’s really common for someone to break up with their abusive partner and get back together several times before the break up sticks. So if they do break up, support her and remind her that she deserves to be happy and respected in her relationship, and avoid proactively bashing her ex. That way if they do get back together, she’ll still feel comfortable coming to you.

Get more info about healthy vs. unhealthy relationships at Love is Respect, plus more tips for helping people in unhealthy or abusive relationships.

-Emily at Planned Parenthood

anonymous asked:

the gengarsexual person who said your text post on not knowing theory is how people rope teens into sexually abusive relationships was "familyfriendlyurl" on here if that means anything to you. i did a cursory look at her twitter and it was garbage mostly

man what. we used to be mutuals. what the fuck