Dear Journal,

Today I woke up next to Sirius sleeping. I loved waking up before him because I could just look at all of his features. Since I met him, he always had flushed cheeks and puffy lips when he was sleeping. I think it’s the cutest thing ever. I would just look at him tangled in the sheets, laying on his tummy. I traced my finger on his broad back, smiling to myself. After all these years I was still so deeply in love with him. His skin was so soft. I removed a strand of his dark hair from his cheek, hoping it wouldn’t tickle him. After cuddling him a few minutes, i sat down in our bed and picked up the daily prophet by our bed. We trained our owl to deliver it by our bed everymorning so we could stay in bed and cuddle. I leaned my back on the headboard and started reading the news. As I was reading, I felt Sirius move next to me. He mumbled some words that I couldn’t understand and his brows were furrowed.

“Rrem-mus..” He mumbled.

“Baby i’m here..” I whispered, hoping to ressure him without waking him up.

“..Re.. j-jush hhold'n..” he said, shaking

“Baby wake up.. it’s okay i’m here love.” I said as he slowly opened his eyes.

“Re? Whe-ere.. What’s going on?” He asked, confused.

“You were dreaming and you looked scared so I woke you.. are you okay?” I asked, stroking his cheek with my thumb.

“Yeah.. I just.. You were hurt and I-I..”

“It was just a dream love.. c'mere.” I said, letting him curl into my chest.

We cuddled in bed all morning and Teddy made breakfast for us.

“We don’t need a house elf with you around!” Sirius joked. “This looks delicious Ted, thank you.”

“Thank you my love. What are you doing today?” I asked him.

“James is coming over and I’ll tell him about my sister and then we’re meeting her for lunch downtown.” He smiled.

“Oh cool! Do you need a ride?” I asked him, tasting the delicious breakfast he made.

“Oh I was going to take my motorbike. I want to show everyone my bike and my cute boyfriend.” He smirked.

Sirius laughed and high fived him.

“That’s my boy!” Sirius said.

“I’ll go wait for James outside. Have a nice bed cudly day or whatever that is!” He laughed leaving our room.

“And be carefull baby!” I yelled as he left.

“I will! Love you!”

“Love you too!”

After breakfast, Sirius jumped on me and stated kissing my neck.

“Do you need attention babe?” I laughed.

“Mhmm.. Can we just stay here all day? We have nothing else to do and I feel like having a bit of fun.” He smirked.

“What kind of fun?” I asked, knowing what was behind his thoughts.

“Well you know.. Me and you, naked, kissing and touching.”

“Oh yeah that seems cool.” I said, teasing him.

“Just stop talking and kiss me!” He said, his hands on my waist.

I crushed my lips on his and tangled my hands in his hair. It was going to be a nice day.

June 26th 2014


The first trimester of this pregnancy was hard on Kaia she had no energy and could hardly keep anything down. Teddy took some time off to help with Thalia but she tired him out so they spent the afternoons napping whenever she was asleep. Thank god she was starting school soon, Kaia wasn’t sure she could handle both her and a baby! 

Cute poses by my girl @wrixles which she’ll be releasing soon. Thank you darling <3

the story of the underwear cockles op

y’all wanna hear the story of how @amazinmango and i got this photo op at phxcon this weekend?


so here’s the thing: n o n e of this was planned. it was amazing, hilarious, ridiculous kismet. 

mango’s had his birthday recently, and so i brought his birthday present with me to phxcon. part of the present was a pair of jensen’s underbears (i think the text i sent mango right after jib was, “we’re close enough that it’s not weird if i buy u underwear right????”) bc i thought that was hilarious from jib and mango is a huge jensen fan and dean!boy. so the original joke was just that mango could have the bear underwear. i also got him a second pair in orange, bc orange is his fav colour. this was as far as i thought this would go. 

so i get into phoenix thursday night and give mango his present. we didn’t know there were cockles photo ops until friday afternoon when we saw hard tickets for sale. i distinctly remember being bummed that my hometown con had cockles photo ops for sale online but phxcon, the one i was actually going to, did not. but obviously once i saw they were available, like. THERE WAS ONLY ONE CHOICE. so after deciding it was completely financially irresponsible when we have no money, i bought the op. 

i can’t remember when it occurred to us that we had both the underbears and a pair of lucky orange underwear for misha in our hotel room. we wanted to do something fun and funny for the op, and cracked ourselves up at the idea. but we were also aware that it could be, you know, kind of sort of maybe intensely uncomfortable to be like (a) i know what underwear u were wearing and (b) here i brought pairs of them for you to further laugh over. i have a T E R R I B L E akdslkjkas embarrassment squick, so we didn’t want to do anything that made us uncomfortable, and we definitely didn’t want to do anything that would make misha or jensen uncomfortable. we wanted them to have fun with us and play around with us. 

we ran our idea passed our roomie, who has some good con experience, to see if she thought it would fly or not. we agreed on judging our plan based on their mood on the day and asking them if they felt comfortable enough to do it was the best course of action, with a back-up plan ready to go immediately just in case, so j+m knew we were serious that they could totally pass on it if it was weird. CONSENT AND SAFE SPACE. we were hella concerned about this. 

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