I hate how whenever someone is found to be the last living relative to some famous historical figure, they’re always some boring ass nobody. Like “Ted Lincoln, Abraham Lincoln’s last living relative is a propane salesman in North Dakota”.
Like, you never see shit like “Hex Lincoln, Abraham Lincoln’s last living relative is a pansexual cyber-goth who owns a komodo dragon and plays in an industrial metal band.”
You want to know who is a little shit? Ted Lincoln, Abraham Lincoln’s son. One time, while there was a battle going on nearby, this little shit fucking changed the US flag to the Confederate flag on top of the Whit House. Even after half of DC packed up their stuff and left, Ted did not get in trouble.