team carry

me entering a match with no healer: guess i must again carry the team on my back, once more must i return to my solemn vigil, i must be the one to bear their sins and keep them moving forward….. oh, the agony, the shame, to imagine a world where i could play a DPS……..

me entering a match where two people have already picked support: *has an existential crisis*

The Time I Took On the Military (And Won)

Considering the staggering amount of votes this one got, here you go!

ok so it’s my sweet sixteen and i took two of my closest friends paintballing. We started off alone with just the three of us. Me and this girl formed a truce so we could take out her brother. He found a building with a roof to shoot from so i was criss crossing and sliding behind shelters.

Long story short with this guy i snuck up behind his building and shot him point blank in the ass while he was climbing a ladder.

Except now his sister is my enemy and a much larger threat.

I criss cross my way back narrowly avoiding being shot. I skid to a stop behind this bush with a really gappy fence and go GOOD ENOUGH BRING IT ON and poke my muzzle through. I cant particularly see but I remembered seeing her in a little chapel window. I aim that general direction and open fire. I immediately hear HIT. When she comes out i see where i hit her. Right between the eyes like I couldnt do that again if I tried. Ill take it.

We’re back at the base ops and these massive dudes come over like “yo wanna join us we need more players” and we’re like “oh ya bud the more the merrier” so we go over and everyone is freaking massive and there’s us three tiny lil teenagers. I over hear they’re a military team and just sigh because i know im dead this is just my luck

Apparently they wanted us so that they could simulate having civilian to protect, who were also armed. (They did a piss poor job of this seriously wtf)

So the game starts and im seperated from my friends. They’re on the opposite team.

Im sticking near the leader and just generally trying not to die. He’s giving me orders as softly and nicely as he can, thinking Im scared. I mean really who wouldnt be?

I wasnt. I was ready to kick butt. When I am silent, be afraid, im planning something.

Next thing i know he’s gone. Shot, running, hiding i dont know and i dont care i gotta move there are way too many heavily armed men in these woods for me to be comfortable

Im trekking through this woodsy area keeping as low as possible because the other team has a freaking sniper and im not dealing with that no thanks im just a tiny teenager leave me alone ok

Im doing my thing and trying to find people to shoot because everyone is mia when i see people ahead.

Not my people.

And they havent seen me yet. Im looking around looking for some decent cover or somewhere to take them by surprise and there is nothing. The entire area is just thistle bushes with massive thorns. And then my idea hits. A wicked, mischievous idea. I grin behind my mask and get ready to lay my trap.

I plop myself down right in the middle of these thistles and army crawl to the path their taking and just lay still.

These guys dont see me.

They’re not expecting someone to be in these bushes cause who is that dumb.

The one dudes boot is an inch from my hand and i spring up and yell SURPRISE before shooting him right in the chest and then the two behind him. Three down, way too many to go. I ran away cackling like a witch

Dont die dont die dont die

I head out again and meet up with some more of my group. They stick me at the back to keep me out of harms way. A valiant, if ineffective effort

Enter enemy attack.

We get split up into two groups to flank them and i end up alone again. I moving slowly, spinning in a slow circled because I am EFFED

I’m a tiny lil sixteen year old girl, all alone, with about 15 guns pointed at me. I was completely surrounded. My comrades who had fled to live and fight another day are now making haste towards me like WHO LEFT THE KID BEHIND HELP HER and im like

hell no i got this

I went absolutely ape shit on their asses.

Shots are flying around me like crazy and everyone is screaming. One of the enemies shouts FALL BACK WHAT THE FU–

I hear one if my partners like HOLY SHIT SHE’S ALIVE

I barrel over one of the attackers and side arm his gun away. I break out from the Circle of Doom and make a mad dash for cover.

I leap into the air and spin to fave them. Im not getting shot in the back I an a WARRIOR

I just start spraying with a battle cry to rattle the heavens

I smack back down to earth and land in a crouch

Every single one of the attackers were shot, usually multiple times, and i didnt get shot once. Frankly no clue how i managed but I am NOT questioning it. Luck or skill I dont care

Eventually it was down to two people. Me and the other teams captain.

He’s a big, scary dude. He had a custom gun that could pop off a frankly alarming amount of shots per second.

The odds arent exactly in my favour.

We find each other right in the middle with trenches and tiny little metal fences for cover. Im walking through like plz dont shoot me i am small be nice

The dude pops up from a trench and starts firing. No mercy here.

Fine then.

I duck behind a fence and it is the most pathetic thing i have ever seen.

I have barely enough room to crouch behind it because it’s so small. The other dude finds a nice big trench and big fence the lucky lil jerk.

So we’re poppin up like weasels trying to get a shot in. I cant hit him, he cant hit me. Up and down and up and down. My fence angles down ever so slightly so im tucked in as tightly as I could. My fence is rattling as shot after shot after shot hits. The shots stop, i poke my muzzle over the edge amd lay down some fire.

And the cycle repeats

I get tired of this little exchange so the next time he goes down i lay on some cover fire and sprint like hell for a near by trench like i am just bookin it thinking dont shoot me dont shoot me imma kill you

i slide in and pop up just as he rises to take a shot. Except im not where he thought id be.

I shot him right in the side of his bald lil head.

So i won. My team legit carried me on their shoulders back to base ops

And that’s the time I, a sixteen year old girl, beat a team of militarily trained behemoths

Who’s Got The Smarts

Viktor Nikiforov has lived his international life getting ferried places by Yakov, exploring with world-savvy Christophe Giacometti, and being led around on the arm of rich sponsors who wanted to take him out for a night.

Yuuri, on the other hand, has spent several years in Detroit– not quite the crime capital of the USA, but close.

This shows when the Katsuki-Nikiforovs start taking more vacations.

In Rio de Janeiro. “Why can’t we just take a shortcut?” Viktor asks, peering down a narrow and dark alley. “We’d make it back to the hotel faster.”

“Vitya, no,” says Yuuri. 

In Chicago. “Yuuri, that was such a nice man, and his dog was the best dog, besides Makkachin.”

“Good dog,” Yuuri says, grabbing Viktor by the lapels to pull him in for a kiss, and to tap his cheek with Viktor’s leather wallet. “Terrible pickpocket. Don’t worry, I got it back for you.”

It even shows when they’re traveling close to home.

“This is my favorite restaurant in Sochi!” Viktor chirps. “Their shades are closed, so paparazzi can’t see in. They’re all fans, and always ask me about skating, but they never bother me for pictures with them! So discreet! It’s like my own little escape, so I wanted to share it with you. Do you like it?”

“It’s wonderful,” says Yuuri through gritted teeth. He grips Viktor’s hand tightly throughout the entire experience, and every time Viktor pitifully tries to ask, “how is the borchst?” Yuuri just smiles grimly at him and scoots closer.

“Darling,” Viktor pouts once they’re back in their hotel room, “I’ve told you that if you’re anxious we can always leave, but you never gave me the signal we agreed on–”

“Vitya,” Yuuri says, and sits him down. “Vitya, that restaurant is very clearly a cover for the Russian mafia.”

“Oh,” says Viktor. “Um.”

“I’ve always thought it was a miracle that you were alive,” Yuuri sighs and snuggles down into his husband’s lap. “Now I’m realizing just how much of a miracle it is.”

In London. They go out for a pub trivia night with Yakov and Yurio. Their team– carried completely by the living legend– destroys the rest, even though Viktor is tipsy and has been chattering with both the French family at the neighboring table and two Germans at the bar in their native tongue. Facts? Viktor knows them all: 18th century literature. Obscure historical references. Chemical compositions. The exact words Beyonce tweeted 3 months ago.

“What the hell,” says Yurio. “This idiot introduced himself to me five times when I first came to the rink. He can’t remember what he ate for lunch. What. The hell.” 

“I think I love him,” Yuuri blurts. They have been married for two years, and his husband is showing the Germans his belly-button. “We have to protect him.” Yakov just smirks.

“He’s all yours, son.”

Ok so what if a Langst spy au??? Just hear me out……
•Shiro is still missing, everyone is expecting Keith to take over until they find Shiro
• they hear about prince lotor, but don’t have any information about him, so Allura and the blade of mamora are planning on sending in an undercover operative to have intel on him.
•lance accidentally walks in on the meeting, and over hears them talking about it.
• lance volunteers to go, thinking that this could be his chance to be able to lift his weight and not feel so much as the 7th wheel.
• Allura is not amused, refusing to send Lance in, cause she does care for him on some level, not that he knows this
• but Lance makes some really good points that it’s not exactly a secret that Lance and Keith don’t get along, that if Lance were to make a big enough argument with Keith, that it could get the Galra to be interested in trying to recruit him
• Allura concedes, cause it’s the best plan that she’s heard through the entire meeting. But she only lets him go on one condition: once they find Shiro, Lance has to come back as soon as possible.
•they all agree that the team shouldn’t know about the plan until after Lance has successfully infiltrated the Galra.
• the plan works great. And Lance is successfully apart of the Galra. And lotor is especially interested in Lance, which is good for the mission, not for Lance though.
•ALOT of creepy one-sided flirting. Lance promises to himself to apologize to Allura for all of his incessant flirting.
•bad news, is the team takes it HARD. First the lost Shiro and now Lance!
• hunk is just begging whatever god are out there that this is just some sort of nightmare and that he’ll wake up from it at any moment. He still believes that Lance will come back to the team.
• Pidge is pretty upset, and thinks that if they got Shiro back, then maybe he can talk some sense into Lance and bring him back.
•Keith is LIVID. He can’t believe that Lance betrayed them, that he had said all those things about him, and just turn his back on the team. Keith believes that Lance has completely turned his back on them, that he isn’t coming back.
• Allura can’t figure out how to tell the team that Lance didn’t actually betray them.
• fast forward to a week or two after the ‘betrayal’ they face off against lotor again, and lance as well.
• somehow Lance and Keith are fighting on a catwalk, about 5-6 stories high. And Keith isn’t holding back. He goes on and on about how lance is a traitor, and how he didn’t deserve to be apart of Voltron
• it definitely hurts lance, but lance has pretty much figured out that Allura hasn’t been able to tell the team yet. But he can’t tell Keith, or else his cover is blown.
•Keith takes swing at lance with his bayard, and puts a huge gash in his face.
• Keith kicks lance into the railing, only for it and lance to fall. But lance is able to catch himself barely on the catwalk, but his hand is too slippery, cover in his blood.
•lance calls for Keith, to help him. Lance knows Keith would let him fall.
•Keith lets him fall.
•it’s either, Keith was in a sort of angry frenzy that he didn’t realize lance was calling for him until it was too late, or something else.
•either way, Keith is sure that Lance is dead, and leaves. Not able to look at the dead body.
•but lance isn’t dead. He’s close to it, but not there yet.
•Lotor finds him and has haggar save his life. Of course, lance doesn’t come out of it whole.
• he had to have his complete spine replaced with one of haggar’s prosthetics. He has a scar on his face from Keith, and his arm had to be replaced as well. But he’s alive.
• to say that Allura is relieved when she gets communication from Lance is an understatement. Especially after Keith told them all that Lance was dead.
• lance still sends information and warnings about certain attacks and plans that the Galra have for months.
• then finally the others find Shiro, and Allura is so glad because that means that not only is Shiro back, but that Lance will come back as well.
• Lance sneaks back on to the castle during a battle between Lotor and the team. (Carrying a flash drive with as much information about lotor and the Galra as it can hold)
• Allura calls a retreat and the other paladins go to the bridge once they have successfully wormholed out of there. You can definitely say that they are surprised to see her talking to some random guy who looks a lot like…oh my god it’s Lance!
•you can definitely say that there are some mixed emotions.
•hunk is so happy! He knew it! Lance was alive! He’s back! He’s going to be okay!
•pidge is kind of weary of it. She’s not sure what to think, he might be back, or it might be a trick.
• Shiro is just confused. the others didn’t tell him about Lance ‘betraying’ them, or that they thought he died. He’s just trying to figure out where Lance came from.
• Keith is drawing his bayard and putting himself in between lance and the others, ready to strike.
•of course NOW is when Allura finally tells them all that Lance was undercover and spying on the Galra. Of course their pissed that they didn’t tell them, mostly at Allura cause she was suppose to as soon as Lance was in.
• Keith now feels like he is the biggest screw up in the room, cause he sees the scar on lance’s face. He realizes that he left his friend to die, even if he was under he idea that he betrayed them. He sees how lance’s eyes go stone cold when he looks at him. He knows that he lost Lance’s trust.

To my fellow female gamers.

(This is about Overwatch, but it can be applied to most competitive games.)

Alright girls. Today I was playing some D.Va in competitive Overwatch. As usual, I was communicating on the voice chat, and as usual, people noticed I was a girl. One guy said to me, “congrats for being the only girl I’ve ever seen who’s not playing mercy.” 

Now, obviously I had noticed how many girls default to playing support - usually the game’s most standard and obvious support (OW Mercy, TF2 Medic, DOTA2 Crystal Maiden). I had some cheeky banter with my friend about a “basic bitch” in a match who was a girl playing mercy.

Yesterday, I queued up with a friend who invited his friend - a girl - and let me tell you something. Her quickplay stats were baffling to me. This girl had 98 hours on Mercy alone, her second most played only having 5 hours. She only had about 7 heroes with play time in total.

Being a fellow girl, I think I know why this is. Guys often like to show off by picking DPS/carry, even going so far as to refuse to change when it’s not a good pick. I’ve never seen this same scenario with girls. Of course I’ve met stubborn and toxic girls in-game, but even when asked, they will change. For example, I was playing a competitive game of Overwatch - attack on Hanamura. There was a girl playing Junkrat. I asked her if she was able to switch to Tracer or someone else who can dive so we could breach the defenses and she got extremely hostile at me but still changed to who I asked. She even played Mercy the next round (and blamed the loss on me because I asked her to change.)

Unlike many guys, girls most often avoid any confrontations or drama buy defaulting to supporting their other teammates. I’m not innocent of this either, I main Lucio, and used to be a support main in TF2 and DOTA2. However, once I realized, hey, I’m allowed to play DPS and carry my team, I started picking heroes besides supports and doing well.

I just wanted to get it out there: Girls, you’re allowed to carry. You’re allowed to be the star. You can do better than guys in games. Someone picks the character you wanted to carry as but is a much lower rank than you? Ask to swap. 70% of the time it will work. They don’t swap? Don’t just pick support and rely on them. I realize “picking whoever you want” can cost the game, but you’re all good and smart enough to still pick wisely, I know it.

Don’t feel bad about maining supports, I still main one in Overwatch. But I only ranked up by branching out, putting my foot down and saying “No, you’re not doing well on that hero, give me a go. Support me instead.”

Now get out there and instalock that Pharah!