Faline had been at the Circus for months now. She was used to it here, and she was comfortable. Every now and again she’d get a phone call from her mother or sister, but never her father. She knew she’d disappointed him when she ran away.
She curled up on her couch with some tea and opened her Diary, ready to write about her most recent date with Ali, when she caught a glimpse of something she’d written months ago - when she’d first arrived
the Circus is amazing. It’s so beautiful here. Everyone is nice too, well most of them. But there isn’t a single detail that doesn’t seemed plucked out of a Fairy Tale. I met Scar today- a ringleader. he helped me when I had a ‘black out’ and hurt my head. He’s really sweet, but kind of scary-
Faline laughed at her own diary, little did she know that she’d be repaying the favor to Scar when he had his own accident and lost his memory. she turned the page and read a bit more
I met this amazing man today. his name is Ali, he’s a Fire Dancer in the Performance Sector, where i work - he’s really hot, and i will feel no shame if i spend a little more time than i should setting up in his tent for his show-
Faline blushed at her own words and quickly turned the page. She hadn’t needed to spend ‘extra time’ in his tent, he was coming over to apartment and eating dinner with her and kissing her in the lake. this brought a smile to her lips
This evening was the night of the dance and oh boy was it something, i found Ali - even with his mask and we went down to the lake and swam, he kissed me too. There’s something special about him. He’s the first guy I’ve been around who i feel hasn’t any intention of using me -
And she was right. But Ali wasn’t the only person she’d met, she’d gotten close to a lot of people here. She still couldn’t believe how everyone here had supported her when her sister was in hospital. Faline stirred her tea and flipped through a few more pages, it was reading someone else’s life, but someone’s who she knew. She re-read all the drama that had taken place in the Circus, Everyone getting engaged, ending it, getting pregnant, getting hurt, beaten, lost, Ariel going bazurk and Faline helping her clean up Scar’s apartment after bandaging her up. She was still worried about Ariel, she hadn’t spoken to her in a while but she knew her state was fragile.
Then there were her dear friends Sally and Emily, the sewing girls, she’d met them both very early on, and they’d been through so much together. but she still love them and them her. Sally had also found love, Artie, a guy Faline approved of 100% for her, they were perfect together.
Then there was Baron, a person who she’d kill for, someone she feels super protective over and is more than happy to take a chunk out of her scheduled to make sure he’s happy. She’d helped him through a lot, but he had also helped her, and now there was a sibling-like relationship between them, but more functional than him and his other siblings
Faline was lost in thought, deep in the memories of what had happened at the Circus.
She’d helped more people than she could remember, met more, laughed and cried more than she had in years and spent every hour improving herself and the performance of her job. She was truly living for the first time in years
re-reading all of her early entries also showed how much she had changed. She could hardly recognize herself. Now she was independent, making a living on her own, away from her family and helping other people. She was further away from them than she had ever been in her life, but this was the first time she hadn’t felt completely alone.
People needed her here, she had a job that got her up every morning and worked her to the bone, but she loved it. She spent hours organizing the prop and costume storage tent for the performers. The tent was in a shocking state when she’d first arrived and that was what she started her job with - making some sense of it.
She pulled herself back from her thoughts and picked up her pen, she began to write
so much has changed here - people have come and gone, i’ve changed for the better, and my life will never be the way it was before the Circus, but i don’t ever want to go back. I love it here, i love the people, i love the mess, the noise, the constant workload i have. it’s like there’s a spell over this place and we’re all fairy-tails and fantasy, and for once in my life i feel whole, like i belong, and like i’m not a screw up.
Tonight i’m going to tell Ali i love him. i’m hoping for the best, but if there’s one thing this place has taught me is that if you never take the chance, you’ll never fail, but you’ll never win.