8

i didn’t realize that being in love with your life can be just as wonderful as being in love with another person. every relationship takes work and effort, and when i put that work and effort into my friends, family, and fans … my life changed completely. i started making choices based on what i wanted, and didn’t feel like i needed to justify them. if i wanted to cut my hair, i did it. if i wanted to move to new york, i did it. if i wanted to take a spontaneous road trip, i did it.

I am a feminist.

Feminism is a collection of movements and ideologies that share a common goal: to define, establish, and achieve equal political, economic, cultural, personal, and social rights for women. This includes seeking to establish equal opportunities for women in education and employment. A feminist advocates or supports the rights and equality of women.

Feminist movements have campaigned and continue to campaign for women’s rights, including the right to vote, to hold public office, to work, to fair wages or equal pay, to own property, to education, to enter contracts, to have equal rights within marriage, and to have maternity leave. Feminists have also worked to promote bodily autonomy and integrity, and to protect women and girls from rape, sexual harassment, and domestic violence.

Feminist campaigns are generally considered to be the main force behind major historical societal changes, particularly in the West, where they are near-universally credited with having achieved women’s suffrage, gender neutrality in English, equal pay for women, reproductive rights for women (including access to contraceptives and abortion), and the right to enter into contracts and own property. Although feminist advocacy is and has been mainly focused on women’s rights, some feminists, including bell hooks, argue for the inclusion of men’s liberation within its aims because men are also harmed by traditional gender roles.

Feminist theory, which emerged from feminist movements, aims to understand the nature of gender inequality by examining women’s social roles and lived experience; it has developed theories in a variety of disciplines in order to respond to issues such as the social construction of sex and gender. Some forms of feminism have been criticized for taking into account only white, middle-class, educated perspectives. This led to the creation of ethnically specific or multiculturalist forms of feminism.

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I am a feminist. I believe women and men should be treated equally. I believe that anyone, especially women, who say they are anti-feminist, probably don’t know what the word means.

Example 1) 

“I don’t need Feminism because although I was raped by a man, I don’t hate men. I’m a survivor, not a victim.” (cite: https://www.facebook.com/WomenAgainstFeminism )

A fine example of someone who doesn’t know what feminism means. 

Feminism: (fem·i·nism) [feməˌnizəm]  // noun // the advocacy of women’s rights on the grounds of political, social, and economic equality to men.

Let me just bold that last part.

EQUALITY TO MEN.

Feminism isn’t hating on men. Some men are feminists too. Feminism is about EQUAL RIGHTS FOR ALL GENDERS.

Example 2)

THAT’S NOT WHAT FEMINISM IS. IT ISN’T BLAMING MEN FOR YOUR POOR DECISIONS. IF YOU GAVE CONSENT TO DO THESE  “UNJUSTIFIABLE, SLUTTY ACTIONS,” THEN IT’S YOUR OWN DAMN FAULT. FEMINISM IS EQUAL RIGHTS FOR ALL GENDERS.

Example 3)

Congratulations. But what about the men if OTHER WOMEN’S lives who DON’T care or respect them? Yes, we’re all aware they exist. Feminism doesn’t mean that women automatically think men are pigs. FEMINISM IS EQUAL RIGHTS.

Guys can walk around topless. It’s applauded when they do. But if a woman dares to wear a shirt that shows her bra strap or her belly button, she’s a slut, a whore, and frowned upon by society. Now. Let’s break some feminism myths.

Myth 1) “All feminists are ugly.”

  • Taylor Swift
  • Beyonce
  • Emma Watson
  • Lena Dunham
  • Amy Poehler
  • Tina Fey
  • Ellen Page
  • Keira Knightley

(They’re all girls for a reason, I wanted to save some for myth number two)

Myth 2) “Guys can’t be feminists.”

  • Daniel Radcliffe
  • John Legend
  • Seth Meyers
  • Louis C.K.
  • Prince Harry
  • Ryan Gosling
  • Andy Samberg
  • Ben Stiller
  • Will Smith
  • Richard Sherman
  • Ashton Kutcher
  • Antonio Banderas
  • President Barack Obama

Myth 3) “Feminism is hating men.”

NO. IT’S. NOT.

Feminism: (fem·i·nism) [feməˌnizəm]  // noun // the advocacy of women’s rights on the grounds of political, social, and economic equality to men.

E Q U A L I T Y

T O

M E N

Okay, I think I’m done here. I know I’m going to lose followers for this, but I don’t care. 

I. AM. A. FEMINIST.

2

There’s an old poem by Neruda that I’ve always been captivated by, and one of the lines in it has stuck with me ever since the first time I read it. It says “love is so short, forgetting is so long.” It’s a line I’ve related to in my saddest moments, when I needed to know someone else had felt that exact same way. And when we’re trying to move on, the moments we always go back to aren’t the mundane ones. They are the moments you saw sparks that weren’t really there, felt stars aligning without having any proof, saw your future before it happened, and then saw it slip away without any warning. These are moments of newfound hope, extreme joy, intense passion, wishful thinking, and in some cases, the unthinkable letdown. And in my mind, every one of these memories looks the same to me. I see all of these moments in bright, burning, red.