taste of life

I’m gonna need you to love me a little harder sometimes. Most days, I’ll act like I’m just fine. I’ll paint my smile across my face and wear it proudly. I’ll laugh loudly like I’ve never tasted sadness in my life. But other days, I will not be so strong. I will not walk boldly into the room, I will collapse into it. My vision of life will be clouded by darkness, and I will make my walls extra thick in hopes that you don’t notice. Please, notice. And when you do, pull me close. Hold me until we’re both too warm for anything else to matter. Let me breathe you in. Tell me that you love me, don’t stop until I respond, and then tell me again. I know this could be inconvenient for you, and I’m sorry. I don’t mean to be a bother, but sometimes I need to be told that I’m worth it.
—  Maxwell Diawuoh , NaPoWriMo Day 6 - Love
Your Birth Tree

Many witches like to choose what their wand is made of by their birth tree, or have seeds/the actual tree nearby for strength/guidance. So here you go 

Dec 23 to Jan 01 | Apple Tree

Jan 02 to Jan 11 | Fir Tree
Jan 12 to Jan 24 | Elm Tree
Jan 25 to Feb 03 | Cypress Tree

Feb 04 to Feb 08 | Poplar Tree
Feb 09 to Feb 18 | Cedar Tree
Feb 19 to Feb 28 | Pine Tree
Feb 29 | Poplar Tree

Mar 01 to Mar 10 | Weeping Willow Tree
Mar 11 to Mar 20 | Lime Tree
Mar 21 | Oak Tree
Mar 22 to Mar 31 | Hazelnut Tree

Apr 01 to Apr 10 | Rowan Tree
Apr 11 to Apr 20 | Maple Tree
Apr 21 to Apr 30 | Walnut Tree

May 01 to May 14 | Poplar Tree
May 15 to May 24 | Chestnut Tree
May 25 to Jun 03 | Ash Tree

Jun 04 to Jun 13 | Hornbeam Tree
Jun 14 to Jun 23 | Fig Tree
Jun 24 | Birch Tree
Jun 25 to Jul 04 | Apple Tree

Jul 05 to Jul 14 | Fir Tree
Jul 15 to Jul 25 | Elm Tree
Jul 26 to Aug 04 | Cypress Tree

Aug 05 to Aug 13 | Poplar Tree
Aug 14 to Aug 23 | Cedar Tree
Aug 24 to Sep 02 | Pine Tree

Sep 03 to Sep 12 | Weeping Willow Tree
Sep 13 to Sep 22 | Lime Tree
Sep 23 | Olive Tree
Sep 24 to Oct 03 | Hazelnut Tree

Oct 04 to Oct 13 | Rowan Tree
Oct 14 to Oct 23 | Maple Tree
Oct 24 to Nov 11 | Walnut Tree

Nov 12 to Nov 21 | Chestnut Tree
Nov 22 to Dec 01 | Ash Tree

Dec 02 to Dec 11 | Hornbeam Tree
Dec 12 to Dec 21 | Fig Tree
Dec 22 | Beech Tree


Apple Tree | Love | of slight build, lots of charm, appeal, and attraction, pleasant aura, flirtatious, adventurous, sensitive, always in love, wants to love and be loved, faithful and tender partner, very generous, scientific talents, lives for today, a carefree philosopher with imagination.

Ash Tree | Ambition | uncommonly attractive, vivacious, impulsive, demanding, does not care for criticism, ambitious, intelligent, talented, likes to play with fate, can be egotistic, very reliable and trustworthy, faithful and prudent lover, sometimes brains rule over the heart, but takes partnership very seriously.

Beech Tree | Creative | has good taste, concerned about its looks, materialistic, good organization of life and career, economical, good leader, takes no unnecessary risks, reasonable, splendid lifetime companion, keen on keeping fit (diets, sports, etc.)

Birch Tree | Inspiration | vivacious, attractive, elegant, friendly, unpretentious, modest, does not like anything in excess, abhors the vulgar, loves life in nature and in calm, not very passionate, full of imagination, little ambition, creates a calm and content atmosphere.

Cedar Tree | Confidence | of rare beauty, knows how to adapt, likes luxury, of good health, not in the least shy, tends to look down on others, self-confident, determined, impatient, likes to impress others, many talents, industrious, healthy optimism, waiting for the one true love, able to make quick decisions.

Chestnut Tree | Honesty | of unusual beauty, does not want to impress, well-developed sense of justice, vivacious, interested, a born diplomat, but irritates easily and sensitive in company, often due to a lack of self confidence, acts sometimes superior, feels not understood loves only once, has difficulties in finding a partner.

Cypress Tree | Faithfulness | strong, muscular, adaptable, takes what life has to give, content, optimistic, craves money and acknowledgment, hates loneliness, passionate lover which cannot be satisfied, faithful, quick-tempered, unruly, pedantic, and careless.

Elm Tree | Noble-mindedness | pleasant shape, tasteful clothes, modest demands, tends not to forgive mistakes, cheerful, likes to lead but not to obey, honest and faithful partner, likes making decisions for others, noble-minded, generous, good sense of humor, practical.

Fig Tree | Sensibility | very strong, a bit self-willed, independent, does not allow contradiction or arguments, loves life, its family, children and animals, a bit of a social butterfly, good sense of humor, likes idleness and laziness, of practical talent and intelligence.

Fir Tree | Mysterious | extraordinary taste, dignity, sophisticated, loves anything beautiful, moody, stubborn, tends to egoism but cares for those close to them, rather modest, very ambitious, talented, industrious, un-contented lover, many friends, many foes, very reliable.

Hazelnut Tree | Extraordinarycharming, undemanding, very understanding, knows how to make an impression, active fighter for social cause, popular, moody, and capricious lover, honest, and tolerant partner, precise sense of judgment.

Hornbeam Tree | Good Tasteof cool beauty, cares for its looks and condition, good taste, is not egoistic, makes life as comfortable as possible, leads a reasonable and disciplined life, looks for kindness and acknowledgement in an emotional partner, dreams of unusual lovers, is seldom happy with its feelings, mistrusts most people, is never sure of its decisions, very conscientious.

Lime Tree | Doubt | accepts what life dishes out in a composed way, hates fighting, stress, and labor, dislikes laziness and idleness, soft and relenting, makes sacrifices for friends, many talents but not tenacious enough to make them blossom, often wailing and complaining, very jealous but loyal.

Maple Tree | Independence of Mind | no ordinary person, full of imagination and originality, shy and reserved, ambitious, proud, self-confident, hungers for new experiences, sometimes nervous, has many complexities, good memory, learns easily, complicated love life, wants to impress.

Oak Tree | Braverobust nature, courageous, strong, unrelenting, independent, sensible, does not like change, keeps its feet on the ground, person of action.

Olive Tree | Wisdom | loves sun, warmth and kind feelings, reasonable, balanced, avoids aggression and violence, tolerant, cheerful, calm, well-developed sense of justice, sensitive, empathetic, free of jealousy, loves to read and the company of sophisticated people.

Pine Tree | Particular | loves agreeable company, very robust, knows how to make life comfortable, very active, natural, good companion, but seldom friendly, falls easily in love but its passion burns out quickly, gives up easily, everything disappointments until it finds its ideal, trustworthy, practical.

Poplar Tree | Uncertaintylooks very decorative, not very self-confident, only courageous if necessary, needs goodwill and pleasant surroundings, very choosy, often lonely, great animosity, artistic nature, good organizer, tends to lean toward philosophy, reliable in any situation, takes partnership seriously.

Rowan Tree | Sensitivity | full of charm, cheerful, gifted without egoism, likes to draw attention, loves life, motion, unrest, and even complications, is both dependent and independent, good taste, artistic, passionate, emotional, good company, does not forgive.

Walnut Tree | Passion unrelenting, strange and full of contrasts, often egotistic, aggressive, noble, broad horizon, unexpected reactions, spontaneous, unlimited ambition, no flexibility, difficult and uncommon partner, not always liked but often admired, ingenious strategist, very jealous and passionate, no compromise.

Weeping Willow | Melancholy | beautiful but full of melancholy, attractive, very empathetic, loves anything beautiful and tasteful, loves to travel, dreamer, restless, capricious, honest, can be influenced but is not easy to live with, demanding, good intuition, suffers in love but finds sometimes an anchoring partner.

i keep trying to memorize every detail of the moments i live in. in the soreness of my legs from standing so long at a concert, the chill of the night, the patterns of a tablecloth, the oily texture in my mouth after eating fried bananas. i keep trying to memorize the feelings, the quiet contentedness, the laughter, the excitement. i keep trying to memorize the people, their smiles, the way they speak, what makes them laugh. i’m constantly on the cusp of the next part of my life and that’s just so.. strange. but it makes it so much easier to find happiness no matter what’s happening to me, in a way? because i’m already kind of looking at life with those rose-colored glasses of nostalgia, simply because i know these are times i’ll never be able to live again, and these are people i might not always have, and that makes it so much easier to appreciate everything i might miss later. 

I want you.
All of you.
On me.
Under me.
Tasting me.
Wanting me.
— 

Desires

-a.n.

commission for shibooinu! :D thank you for the lovely request, it’s been nice to draw these two again!

How to Become His Dream Girl, Even if You’re Not (A Spoiled GF Guide)

so recently, within the past 2 months I have successfully become a spoiled gf, this (surprisingly) was a whole lot easier than I thought it would be, but using this technique (that I kind if made up) I broke it down into some simple steps :)

STEP ONE: Pick someone you wont mind spending a considerable amount of time with

- Realize that this isn’t a sugar daddy, this man wants to have a full on relationship with you, therefore you will be spending a large amount of time with him so you WILL HAVE TO DEAL WITH HIM. So just make sure that he is someone you can handle without wanting to strangle after 45 minutes.


STEP TWO: Charm the fuck out of him, then have him open up to you

- You have to make him want you, be alluring and kind. smile at him, laugh at his jokes, compliment him on shit that you might not even care about. Right now you are selling a prophecy, an introduction to a relationship. Make yourself sound as interesting as possible but leave him always wanting more, always have him talk about himself more than you talk about yourself. try to pick up on little things and get a read on his emotional status and how he chooses to react to certain situations, learn about him so you can mold yourself into his dream woman. Once he sees your “genuine” interest in him, he will start opening up to you and THIS is where you’ll really need to pay attention.


STEP THREE: Find out what intimate part of his life is missing

- THIS IS KEY LADIES AND GENTLEMAN!!! You will have to figure out what relationship related snippet is really missing. In my case my sugar boyfriend (ill call him T) was married for 10+ years and never really got what he wanted out of the marriage and was constantly lied to, but ended up staying on behalf of his 4 step kids. after getting divorced he dated a stripper who just used him for his money even though he supposedly had “genuine” feelings for her. After learning about his tragic love history I came to the conclusion that what he really needed out of a relationship was mutual affection and to feel valued. KEEP IN MIND, THIS STEP CAN TAKE A WHILE AND INCLUDES LOTS OF TRIAL AND ERROR. So after coming up with my hypothesis of the lack of value and affection, I decided to put it to the test and did 2 simple things in order to do so. first, while he was at work, I called him to see how his day was going. You would have thought I was god himself calling because he was so happy to hear from me and to hear that I was thinking about him and that I took the time out to call him and let him know that. Second, I cooked him dinner. One day while I was staying at his house I decided to surprise him with a very basic meal (frozen salmon fillets and sautéed bell peppers) and yet again, he was so happy and excited at the fact that I had done that for him. This is when I knew I was on the home stretch


STEP FOUR: Focus on the missing intimate piece, and make it your specialty

- This is what has him keep you around, doing the things that he needed but never got. don’t get me wrong, I’m not cooking this man dinner everyday, instead I switch it up and substitute certain actions. He loves affection, so when we’re sitting on the couch together ill lay my head on his lap, or hold his hand and stroke the side of his face. I’ve learned that simple shit like that makes him incredibly happy, which makes him incredibly generous.


STEP FIVE: Get Spoiled

- Now after giving him a taste of life with you in it, you need to give him a taste of how much your life costs. By now he’s showered you in nice dinners and gifts on the whim, but you’re here for the kill, you want a access to the finances and for him to get you whatever you want. For me, this was by far the easiest step out of all of them, I told him I wanted to go shopping and that I needed some stuff from Lush and Sephora (he had no idea what either of those places were) AND HERE IS WHERE YOU GET HIM. Make sure he sees how expensive it is just to be you, talk to him about your favorite products and what you need and use on the daily (hype them up in price too, like if you need foundation and you usually use L'Oréal, rave about the Gorgio Armani foundation instead) make it seem like your mere existence is expensive, by now this man wants to take care of you and wants to keep you in his life and therefore will do what it takes to keep you near and dear. Once he see’s how “hard” it is to be you, he will make it easier



At this point in my relationship with T, I am nearly moved into his house and have full usage of his ex-wife’s Lexus and his credit card, and tomorrow I get to meet his mother. Once you get on the right path of knowing what a man is missing in this life, you’ll be able to use that to your advantage and have him truly believe that you’re the woman of his dreams, even if you’re just a Faux Heaux :)

Everyone knows onions make you cry, especially when they’re stomping all over your dreams and disregarding your sharply felt emotions. WHO NEEDS EM. But then…alas…they taste so good…Life is but a paradox.