SO HAHAHA TIME FOR POSTS I’m kinda more OK now to do that (but still not fully). Made a cleaner fanart of her, sorta. I’m not sure about the accuracy though, all the pictures we’ve got are all dark and blurry. Sorry!
First things first, yeah I know it’s not stated it’s not final it’s not everything but anyway I have my right to talk about the current Eva’s design, don’t I.
To begin with, I definitely like that they retained her racy look though she might not even be a racer by that time. Secondly, look at my space wife LOOK AT MY SPACE WIFE SHE GREW UP SO FAST!!! I definitely like her outfit more than Maya’s. It’s just more suitable for racing in the first place and I like the way she still remains being feminine badass and sexy at the same time. THE GIRL IS BACK TO KICK YOUR BUTTS! She hasn’t forgotten about her diskman and googles (thanks GOD she isn’t wearing them on her head all the time anymore omigosh. I wish she puts them on only when she really needs them now). On the other hand, she still has her hair dyed the same way and her piercing that shows her teenage side. The second one is kinda tricky because you know, you might think that some things you did or wore were dumb BUT well I don’t think those two are actually that bad, but obviously I think not so good of them bc it’s made to make her more recognizable and stuff. So yeah, 50/50. Anyway, LOOK AT HER JORDAN STYLE GLOVES AWWWW OMG too cute. So yeah, in general. Kudos!
Summary: A fic where Maya and Riley are having a sleepover and they make a list each of what their perfect boyfriend would be and look and act like for fun and later Farkle and Lucas find the list and each of them are all like – for example – “Hey, why is this about Farkle?” but a lot better haha, and then the girls are kinda in shock and stuff and act awkward around the two boys.
Whenever she can’t get subtitles working she makes him come over to translate her Korean soaps and at first it was the worst form of torture but now Farkle’s really invested and comes over whether she’s got the subtitles or not
‘Real friends don’t judge each other. They judge other people together’
Best way to summarize them lmao
Despite their ‘divorce’ when he started dating Izzy, they joke about her being Mrs. Minkus literally all the time
He’s picked her drunk ass up from a party at 3 in the morning way too many times. It gets to a point where his father is surprised when Maya isn’t there on Saturday mornings
Farkle’s parents bought him a freaking sports car when he passed his drivers test and Maya’s like “I’m never paying for transportation again!” and makes him drive her everywhere
E v e r y w h e r e
She’s always constantly torn between the thoughts of “I don’t want Farkle to think I only hang out with him because he’s rich” and “Bitch I’m broke buy me stuff”
Emergency starbucks runs all throughout high school
Like she’d fake notes to get him out of class and he’s like “what’s wrong” and she’s like “what’s wrong is that there currently isn’t a chai tea latte in my hands lets fix it” and he’s like “I WAS IN THE MIDDLE OF A PRESENTATION THAT’S WORTH 15 PERCENT OF MY GRADE” but he sneaks out of school and takes her anyway lmao
Honestly 90% of the time you can find them leaning against walls trying to look cool while wearing their fucking matching round mirrored sunglasses and sipping their starbucks I hate these losers
She tried so hard to get into sci-fi for his (and Riley’s) sake but she falls asleep every time. Even Chris Pines face couldn’t save her
Although online she acts like she loved the newer Star Wars movie and posts jokes about it to be cool even tho she literally didn’t even see it and Farkle’s just like “you are the fakest fake bitch I have ever met”
Maya’s the type of person where ‘You’re so cute, I adore you, you’re my favorite person’ comes out as ‘I hate you so much, you are a piece of dirty trash and I want to punch your disgusting face’ but Farkle learned to translate her language very well over the years lmao
Maya started a rumor around the school that Farkle’s a massive pothead and now everyone tries to buy weed from him
He retaliated by starting a rumor that she’s not a real blonde
So she told everyone he doesn’t have a bellybutton
So then he told everyone that the movie ‘Teeth’ was inspired by her
This went back and forth for a while
Lol they’re the type of friends who can just chill together in complete silence for hours and it’s good
One of them will wake up in the middle of the night, text a horrible pun to the other, and go back to sleep and ignore the angry reply
Barely have a concept of personal space
She’ll walk in on him and Riley getting dressed and just talk like normal and he’s like “MAYA LEAVE THIS ISN’T FOR YOU” lmao
Sometimes if Maya strikes while Farkle’s in a weird mood they team up to be Reckless Young Adults™ and tbh it happens too often Riley will probably develop an ulcer soon
One time Maya threw a rager party at Farkle’s house and forgot to tell him lol
He woke up to loud music and people hooking up in his bathtub this poor boy
He found her to yell at her and she was just like “whoops” and then had the nerve to not give him the AUX cord dammit Maya no one wants to hookup listening to Five Seconds of Summer
Even when they’re grown ass adults and both married if Maya learns any detail at all about Farkle and Riley’s ~private lives~ she screams loudly and then will bring it up with him in conversation to laugh at how uncomfortable he gets
Because he does get way too uncomfortable omfg she doesn’t even use specifics she’ll just throw out a casual “Proud of you, champ!” and he’s bright red and screaming at her to shut up
‘You look sad that means WE HAVE TO PUT ON JAZZ MUSIC AND DANCE IMMEDIATELY’
M e m e W a r s
One time Maya was pissed at him for some little thing but it was his birthday so she bought him. Just. So many turtleneck sweaters and a copy of ‘Dracula’ and he almost had her removed from the premises
They’re both on a semi professional bowling team but NO ONE CAN EVER KNOW
One time Farkle’s standing in the hallway having a casual conversation with a teacher about a project and Maya comes up and starts tugging on his sleeve and he’s like what?? But before he can comprehend what she’s doing she’s got his arms and just literally pulls his button up off his body and slips it on so now he’s just standing there in the tshirt he had under it and she’s buttoning up
And he’s trying so hard not to laugh but he’s so confused he’s like “Can I help you?” and she just shrugs and says “I was cold” and walks away and he’s like???? So was I?????
And the teacher is cracking the fuck up at this whole exchange and Farkle has this incredulous look on his face but he just turns back to the teacher and is like “So anyway,” which made the teach laugh harder lol
He never got that shirt back
She’s front row (with Riley obvs) for all of his performances/debates/whatever and drinks a lot of coffee before hand so she’s sure she won’t fall asleep
Near the end of sophomore year he ends up on the Track Team because one of her pranks went horribly wrong and if he explained that she’d get suspended so now Farkle Minkus is *technically* a jock lmao
They have some weird inside joke/war involving marshmallows and literally no one but them understands it but occasionally one of them will just find a bag of marshmallows in their locker/drawer/backpack/what have you and get SO PISSED OFF it’s so funny
Deep conversations at 3 in the morning
Sometimes he falls asleep while they’re hanging out and she’s like “Aww my pet loser is cute I’m gonna stroke his hair but he can never know” and other times he’ll fall asleep and she’s like “FINALLY now I can draw photorealistic pictures of dicks on his face and post the pics online!!!”
One time they were fighting about something and Maya left the room and came back with a chair and climbed on that so she could make eye contact with him while she was yelling at him lmao
Omfg Riley’s always been tall so Maya and Farkle were the teeny tiny ones it was their thing and when he hit his first growth spurt she felt so betrayed
By the time he officially stopped growing he’s like 6′6 which is a full foot and a half taller than Maya and she’s so angry about it
One time they got bored and actually tried to sneak into an R rated movie by having her climb on his shoulders and hide under a trench coat
They were both over 17 too they literally didn’t need to sneak in they just wanted to see if they could do it
She steals his glasses all the time and runs around yelling spells from Harry Potter
She never actually cared too much about his families money until she found out all their blankets are made from literally the most expensive fabric in the world (vucana) and that’s so ridiculous to her and so if she’s ever loosing an argument she’ll say something like “why don’t you cry into your rare sheep blankets” only more clever sounding than that it’s 2 am cut me a break and then he fucking gave her one for her birthday one year and she’ll go on and on about how it’s so stupid that it’s so expensive but and it’s unnecessary and Farkle’s a rich loser who can’t appreciate that but in reality she’ll never get over how soft that shit is she will never sleep anywhere without that blanket again holy shit
One time Farkle and Lucas got in a fist fight and Lucas was expecting the girls to side with him but they were #TeamFarkle all the way and Maya didn’t talk to Lucas for like 3 weeks on behalf of Farkle’s black eye
Once he and Riley have kids and eventual grandkids and so on Maya 100% always refers to them as The Minkii and when Riley and Farkle move out of an apartment to a big house with a lot of surrounding land she took one look at it and said something to the affect of “Such beautiful fields where the wild Minkii can roam free” and Farkle almost choked from laughing
One time Farkle had to save Maya because her hair caught on fire and to this day no one can figure out how she even managed that
They both have a secret, closeted passion for Macklemore
One time they were alone and sang ‘Helpless’ from Hamilton together and they did the whole thing then stared at each other for a moment and finally Farkle was like “That was the most adorable thing we’ve ever done and it was so disgusting thank God no one is around” and Maya’s like “I know I wanna puke what’s wrong with us!!!”
In third grade Maya beat up a 5th grade boy on Farkle’s behalf and that was the day he realized she actually liked him and wasn’t just putting up with him for Riley
So a million years later when they witnessed his daughter Tessa punch a kid on behalf of her daughter Violet, and then saw Violet realize that Tessa actually liked her and didn’t just hang out with her because their parents lumped them together, Maya and Farkle literally almost cried
Who are we kidding they did cry
They cried a lot
One time Maya and Riley sent him on a tampon run and texted him the whole time and it was one of their funnier conversations and Maya posted the screenshots online and titled them “Farkle Minkus Discovers The Patriarchy” and it blew up to the point that it briefly became a meme and talk show hosts made jokes about it
They take High School Musical very seriously
She has 1 tattoo and she almost chickened out of getting it Farkle literally had to bribe her to go through with it because YOU CANT TELL RILEY YOU’RE GONNA GET MATCHING TATTOOS THAN COP OUT AFTER RILEY ALREADY GETS HERS DONE M A Y A
For a while in middle school/early high school Farkle wouldn’t tell Maya about any problems he was having ever because he thought she wouldn’t take him seriously and she was downright horrified when she found that out omfg
And she mostly only found out about it because Riley locked them in her room for like 3 hours lmao
When they team up to snark and annoy teachers together, magic happens
The girls have a surplus of embarrassing pet names for Farkle dating back to when they met but Maya and Farkle are having a serious moment she usually goes for “Farkly” cause it makes him laugh
Lmao she lets him and only him get away with calling her ‘Sweetheart’. One time Lucas tried it and promptly almost lost his hand
Okay so we all know that Maya’s going to be an amazing and successful artist because she’s so talented but I feel like at some point Farkle would help her career by being that guy that pays an outrageous amount of money for one of her paintings and then tells all the smarmy rich people he can that it’s from an up-and-coming artist and brag about how much money he spent because that’s basically rich peoples version of a dick contest so then they’re all rushing to buy her paintings and she’s making way more money than she expected and suddenly she’s one of the hottest painters in the art world and she doesn’t even know that Farkle is the one who bought the first painting but she suspects
She saw the recent study that said people with Rh negative blood are probably aliens and sent it to him as a joke like ‘have we found our explanation’ but he got SO UPSET BECAUSE HE ACTUALLY IS RH NEGATIVE AND SHE DIDN’T EVEN KNOW
So that caused another minor identity crisis lmao
Every time she sees a math joke even she sends it to him even if she doesn’t understand it
He tutors her a lot
At Maya’s wedding she had Riley as her Maid of Honor and then Farkle as her Best Person instead of another bridesmaid it was cute
One time everyone in the Matthews Clan was doing something but Cory finished work early so he was expecting to come home to an empty apartment but instead he found Maya and Farkle laying on the couch, watching Netflix and eating the leftover dinner he had been dreaming of eating all day omfg
Farkle still has that NYC skyline sketch she did framed in his room
You know how sometimes Maya narrates what’s happening ina goofy voice??? Farkle eventually gets in on that too they have a lot of fun with it
The boy could just breathe and Maya will yell “You emo hipster trash!” like she needs him to know that she’s judging him every second of every day
Every time he tries to wear a beanie she steals it and says something to the affect of “it looks cuter on me”
Every time he posts a selfie the first comment is Maya Hart: ‘You ain’t cute.’
Every time she posts a selfie the first comment is Farkle Minkus: ‘Yikes.’
Why do they always instinctually know when the other is posting selfies??? One of life’s great mysteries
Okay once Shawn gets more involved and anything he gets to know Farkle and thinks he’s a swell kid but sometimes he’ll be coming home after a long flight for work and he just wants to sleep and instead he walks into his apartment to see Farkle in the kitchen building a freaking nuclear reactor for all he knows as Maya’s trying to cook and actually only succeeding in burning stuff and he’s just. So tired.
And then whatever Farkle’s trying to do fails miserably and explodes and Shawn just looks at Maya and is like “You bring this Spawn into my house,”
Oh my God every time the group is caught by parents taking a thousand pictures before a dance Maya always insists on taking a prom pose pic with Farkle but she always wants to be in the boys spot lmao they really sell it
Maya taught Farkle how to skateboard after the Great Crash of ‘08 because he was too scared to get back on a bike afterwards
They both are 900% the type of people to put sunglasses on before making a bad joke/pun
They somehow usually manage to do it in unison too omfg stop them
Farkle’s a sound cloud asshole Maya is so enraged by it
There’s like a drawer and a half in Farkle’s room filled with both Riley and Maya’s clothes and he’s got quite a few items laying around their houses too
If the group watches horror movies there’s a 97% that at least once in the film, Maya will get to scared and jump to hide behind Farkle’s shoulder. Cory caught a candid photo of it once lmao
Basically both Maya and Farkle are perfect mixes of asshole and dorky and they adore each other no matter what MY CHILDREN
In which Maya finds out why Lucas called her a short stack of pancakes.
Maya Hart absolutely hated today.
For the week prior, flyers littered the halls, announcements over the PA system were made, and reminders at the end of every single school day informed students about this day. With each reminder, Maya could feel a vein in her forehead just aching to pop.
It was now Friday morning, forty-five minutes before the bell would ring to alert everyone of the beginning of the school day. There, the 5’2” blonde—with her heels on mind you—stood at the entrance of her middle school cafeteria eying the John Quincy Adams student body. How dare they! Did they not know what they were doing? Did they not know the meaning behind of all this?! What traitors! It was a really good thing that her best friend Riley had her back.
“Blueberry! Banana! Chocolate chip, Maya!” Her best friend—so called, might she add in at this point—looped her green canvas jacket clad arm through Maya’s fishnet covered one and tugged her towards the line that wrapped around the whole lunch room. Farkle and Lucas joined soon after and it was the Minkus that noticed the—what seemed like permanent—scowl on Maya’s face.
“Ouch, Maya. Not in the mood for—“
“Don’t say it—“ She tried to interrupt.
“Pancakes!” The over joyous brunette eighth grader proclaimed, her brown eyes glazing over in absolute mirth at the sight of all the types of pancakes. Big ones, small ones, medium ones. Heart-shaped, crown-shaped, even ones that resembled lady bugs!
Lucas, the tallest of the group—seriously what was up with that? Did steroids help you get taller? Maya would have to look into that later.— started to pass trays down the line. “Really, Maya? Why the long face, you look madder than a wet hen!”
Reluctantly, Maya took the tray in her left hand and lazily slit it along the counter top. With the tilt of her head and a rise of her brow, she looked up at Bucky McBoingBoing with an expression that could only be read as, ‘Are you serious right now?’ And he says she never listens to the way he speaks.
A rich laugh left the Friar. “You look upset is what I’m trying to say.”
Riley snapped out of her pancake fantasy as if she just had an epiphany, Maya swore she could see the gears in her head turning. “Oh oh—“ she started off extremely excited, proud of her discovery, “—oh…” Her enthusiasm dropped, replaced with embarrassment. “You know it probably has something to do with uh…” The girl started to rock back and forth on the heels of her shoes, waiting for the line to progress, “You know…”
Farkle nodded his head, completely on the same page now. “Oh, yes. Makes sense.” He paused to turn to face Lucas directly, assuming that the City Cowboy hadn’t made the connection yet. “It’s ‘cause you called her a short stack of pancakes.”
What was that saying about assuming again?
Maya reached her hand out to smash it against Farkle’s face, his nose smashed against her palm. Her glare only intensified with the rather animalistic growl that escaped her. Both Lucas and Riley cringed, trying to avoid the subject. Unfortunately, they hadn’t changed the subject quick enough nor had they clamped a hand over Farkle’s mouth before he could make an ass out of himself.
Now, let’s set the record straight. Eric Matthews had resolved the argument. They had made up and everything was better! Okay, so maybe not everything. One: Later never came so Maya never dealt with Lucas as she promised. Two: Lucas never answered why he let Maya call her those names. But those two things were never brought up again. Even so, Maya was still a girl of pride! Heck, she knew she was short but being called out on it was just not something she took lightly. Finally, she dropped her hand and wiped her palm on her pant leg, ridding it of the Farkle germs. The line finally started moving and everyone received their pancakes.
Riley opted for six mini-pancakes in the shape of crowns. She mentioned how it was what the princess of the student body deserved. Farkle made sure that each and every single pancake in his tall stack was symmetrical. This aggravated Geralyn the Lunch Lady to no end. Lucas had a small stack of regular pancakes on his own plate. And after some persuasion from her friends, Maya was now sitting at a table, surrounded by said friends, staring at a stack of pancakes that started at about the same size of her hand then gradually got smaller until the top of the stack.
With a scrunch of her nose, Maya sighed heavily and rolled her eyes before reaching a hand out to the middle of the table. “Fork over the syrup, Huckleberry!” Lucas stretched his own hand out to give her the syrup. No ‘thanks’ in reply, typical Maya. Regardless of her lack of manners, the gentleman that Lucas was tipped his imaginary hat and winked across the table.
Maya sat silently, eating at her pancakes while the rest of her friends were engulfed in a conversation about Belgium, 1831. She herself was having a small conversation in her head.
“The Pros and Cons of Eating These Pancakes” by Maya Hart. They were really good. Like extremely good. But they cost 5 bucks! The five dollars did go to the Wounded Warrior Project. She could have saved those five dollars and instead eaten at the Matthews. But it was toaster strudel again. These pancakes were delicious though… But hey, wait! Eating these pancakes would mean she succumbed to Ranger Rick’s torment! It would mean giving in and accepting that she WAS in fact a short stack of pancakes! I mean, yeah she’s short, but still. Ah screw it, these pancakes were the best she’s ever had!
By the time she had made up her mind, she was already on her last bite of pancakes.
She looked up, only to find four empty plates on trays and only one other person at the table with her.
“Where’d Farkle and Riley go?”
“They headed over to class,” Lucas had this huge grin on his face and she couldn’t quite figure out why it was there. “They left ‘bout five minutes ago, but you were busier than a one-legged cat in a sandbox eating at your pancakes.”
Again, she gave him the look. She shook her head, as if she didn’t quite catch what he had said. Her eyes were blinking rapidly, confusion written all over her face. “I’m sorry, Ranger Rick say what now?”
He looked down at the trays and laughed to himself before getting up and piling them on top of one another, heading towards the garbage can. Maya stood up and followed behind him.
“I meant that you were way too preoccupied in that head of yours to notice that they were gone. They even called out to you to get your attention. Said they’d just wait for you, but I told ‘em to go on ahead.” After sliding the scraps off the plates, Lucas went to the conveyer belt that would take the plates and trays to the back where Lunch Lady Geralyn would scrub them down. Again, Maya followed.
She stood there, all 5’2” of her, eyes full of determination. Her hands where at her hips, one cocked to the side. She meant business. It seemed that now—when it was just herself and Lucas Friar— was later.
It had been a question on her mind since he uttered those words, though it was stashed in a small closet in the back of her mind, saving it for the opportune moment.
“Of all the things, Bucky McBoingboing, why a ‘short stack of pancakes’?” Her voice came in a mock southern accent, way thicker than Lucas’, but hey. It was for added effect!
Lucas couldn’t help but bite his lip to hold back his laughter. There was no way he could take her seriously. She was short enough that the top of her head only came to the bottom of his chin. He could easily toss her over her shoulder and drag her to class with him. His legs were long enough that he could out run her without much effort. Oh, she also had a little bit of syrup smeared on her upper lip.
“I’m sorry, but you’re really not that threatening with a syrup mustache, Short stack.” Without hesitation, he reached a hand out and with his thumb, wiped away the syrup. Lucas then looked down at his thumb, messy with the syrup before shrugging and putting the digit into his mouth.
Maya stared at him as if he had grown an extra head right then and there in front of her own two eyes.
“Oh, and well. I like pancakes. My mama would make ‘em for me and told me I shouldn’t have too many or my stomach would start hurtin’. She always gave me a short stack. But you know,” he paused and grinned, tipping his imaginary cowboy hat before walking away towards class, still facing her direction, “a short stack always left me wantin’ more.” Lucas then turned around and started a slow jog to Mr. Matthews’ classroom.
Maya stared at Lucas’ retreating form in utter shock.
This is my first fan fiction in the longest time. I just started this blog and honestly, one of the reasons why I did start it was to get this idea out of my head and onto wonderful world that is the inter webs.
Nothing too major going on here, just a little Lucaya moment. :) Like, reblog, maybe even let me know what you think, yeah? Criticism is always welcomed. It helps us grow and mature in our writings!
I don’t know if anyone has noticed this yet. Okay one of the girls visibly looks like Riley and is taller like Riley and one visibly looks like Maya and is shorter like Maya. The “Maya” was shown to take Jake from the “Riley”. But if you look closer, the roles are switched. The one we thought was “Maya” calls the other one peaches… but Riley calls Maya peaches. Another thing is that the “Maya” says thunder first, but Riley usually says thunder first.
This would mean that the shorter one is the Riley and the taller one is the Maya. This could have to do with the fact that Maya technically dated Lucas in the first episode, or it could mean nothing and I’m wrong. it’s just something I noticed.