tall shot

who would win in a fight: hozier vs. sufjan stevens


  • ten feet tall, making face-shots difficult
  • capable of a sub-sonic vocal blast that may paralyze an opponent for several seconds
  • is a level 10 lgbt ally, allowing him to use fire balls and limited lightning magic

sufjan stevens:

  • extremely sneaky
  • exudes an aura of sadness which has the chance to emotionally devastate his opponent
  • sharp little claws

look at these two tall strong men who love each other together at the institute

Bruise [ IV ]

Genre [Rating] : Angst [M]

Length: 9.8k

Pairing: Chanyeol x Reader

Summary: He wasn’t yours, and you weren’t his, but that couldn’t stop your heart from believing otherwise.

Bruise Masterlist

Originally posted by porkdo-bi

The frigid air blowing against your back did little to alleviate the heat brewing just under your skin, lips parted as you gulped down oxygen. A daze was overtaking your brain as your eyes fell shut and your lungs heaved, a thin layer of sweat coating your skin. His lips pressed into your barely covered chest, followed by your collarbones, making a trail of wet open mouthed kisses up your neck. It made a lazy smile flutter up on your lips, fingers reaching out to push through his hair as his palms slid along your hips, grinding you down against his lap. He leaned forward and combined his lips with your parted ones, exhaling heavily against them as his body fidgeted with a faint moan. It vibrated through you as your palms massaged his broad chest, the car filled with enough heat to begin fogging the tinted windows while you straddled his lap.

Keep reading

Neither Innocent Nor Guilty

Pairing: Wonho x Reader

Genre: Smut

Word Count: 4.2k

Warnings(?): rough sex, semi-public, hair pulling

Summary: Lawyer!AU ~ In which you triumph over the infamously powerful prosecutor, Shin Hoseok, in court, so he finds another way to get what he wants in the courthouse bathroom.

[disclaimer] All of my knowledge about courtroom/legal procedure is wholly derived from my love of legal dramas and shouldn’t be taken as factual, lol.

“Isn’t it true you killed your son, Ms. Choi? You were angry that he planned to abandon you for the woman you had strongly opposed, tainting the family reputation you hold so dearly to yourself. He was going to ruin everything for you, wasn’t he? He was going to ruin that crystalline reputation you had spent so many years perfecting for the public, had spent and sacrificed so much to preserve, and he was going to throw it all away, am I right?”

The mousy woman in front of you wailed, face contorting and twitching in anger and indignation. Tears spilled out of her swollen eyes . “I WOULD NE-”

You continued relentlessly, raising your voice to be heard over hers. “And so you carefully plotted his death, didn’t you, Ms. Choi? You were so driven by your anger that you felt the only way to resolve it was to kill him yourself and to pin it on your maid-”

“OBJECTION!” The tall, broad-shouldered prosecutor shot upwards from his seat, eyes blazing as he stared incredulously at you, fists slamming into his table. “HEARSAY!”



“I heard you the first time, Mr. Shin.” The judge silenced him with an abysmal wave of his hand. The prosecutor snapped his mouth shut in anger, the muscle in his jaw jumping as he clenched it. “Overruled. Ms. (Y/L/N) elicits a crucial development that is integral the proceedings of this court. As for you, Ms. (Y/L/N), I would thank you restrain yourself and to get to your point.”

You nodded tightly, shooting a defiant half-smile at the prosecutor, stomach flipping as you watched his eyes darken. “You fed your son a meal laced with arsenic with your own blood-covered hands as he looked on at you with nothing but love and ignorance. You watched the bright light fade from his eyes as he convulsed on your living room floor, and now you sit here, still refusing to take responsibility for your abhorrent actions. Instead you choose to not just end one life, but even more. Instead, you place the blame on the maid who has been employed by your family for a decade, the maid who is a single mother with 3 young children that depend on her for their living. So, I’ll ask you one more time, Mrs. Choi. Isn’t it true that you killed your son?”

The prosecutor had his fists balled at his sides, muscles coiling under the fabric of his tight fitting suit, his full lips drawn straight in a tight line. You did your best not to think of those hands on you, pinning you against a table. Your thoughts were scattered and incoherent under his gaze. He stared at you intently, wondering exactly who this new lawyer was that had broken his reputation as the shark of the prosecutors. It was guaranteed, or at least it had been before you, that the defendant would be jailed whenever they were pitted against him. He’d never seen anyone or anything like you before, so terrifying and formidable in the courtroom. Not to mention how perfectly your pencil skirt hugged every curve on your body, how your blouse enunciated the curve of your chest and highlighted the graceful curve of your neck. A match for him. More than that, even. When your tongue had darted out to wet your bottom lip as you concentrated on your papers, he had practically dropped all his papers, only barely playing it off as a slip of his fingers.

You did your best to ignore his burning eyes, focusing instead on the disheveled woman in front of you.

“I-I-I only wanted to protect him,” she gasped brokenly, entire body shaking in the effort to speak clearly. “I wanted to protect my h-husband. He killed my son,” she slurred, “he killed him.”

The jury inhaled sharply at her confession, a cacophony of murmurs breaking out in the group.

You released a small breath of relief, turning to give your client a warm smile. She had collapsed against her chair in disbelief, tears of joy welling in her large eyes as she returned it.


The jury barely needed any time to converge, returning after only a few minutes. Despite your confidence in your argument, you found your leg bouncing nervously, jostling your robes. You bit your bottom lip subconsciously, wanting nothing more than for the judge to hurry up and call the case.

“Nervous?” mouthed the prosecutor across the room, cocky smile twisting his full lips.

You tried to ignore how his broad chest pulled the fabric of his suit tight across his body, clinging to every muscle, outlining his godly figure. How was it even legal that someone like him was a prosecutor? You could feel the weight of his gaze on your body, burning and heavy, and you suddenly felt as if your mouth was very, very, dry. All you could do was scoff and turn to face pointedly away from him.

The corner of his mouth lifted as if he knew what you were thinking. Cocky bastard.

Both of you straightened as the judge cleared his throat. “Members of the jury, have you reached a verdict?”

The jury spokesman stood hastily, dotting the sweat beading at the edges of his receding hairline. “Y-yes, your honor.”

The judge glanced upwards. “Members of the jury, on the Case of Korea v. Park, what you say?”

“Your honor, the members of this Jury unanimously find the defendant NOT GUILTY of first degree murder.”

You let out a loud breath, lungs burning, but it was drowned out by the appreciative cries of your client as she threw her arms around you, tears of joy streaming down her face.

“Thank you, thank you, thank you,” she shouted, voice muffled by your hair. “Thank you, thank you, thank you.” She repeated it over and over again like a mantra, no amount of words able to truly encapsulate the euphoric feeling. She hugged you one last time before running out of the courtroom, undoubtedly to tell her family the good news.

Despite having won your first big case, your thoughts kept wandering back to that sinfully attractive cocky prosecutor; you kept thinking about those long fingers digging into your hair, those full lips pressed against your throat, and that tousled mess of hair that you wanted nothing more than you thread your fingers through while pulling him closer, deeper into your body. “Agh,” you hissed to yourself, fingernails digging into your palm as you walked down the hall. You could feel your cheeks reddening. Couldn’t you have been attracted to anyone else? You reached up and pulled your hair out of the restraining bun so it cascaded down around your shoulders.

“Good,” a voice behind you said, “it looks better down.”

You whirled in surprise. Speak of the fucking devil. There he was, godly proportions, signature arrogant smirk and all, right in front of you. Why do bad things happen to good people? “Shouldn’t you be off somewhere mourning the case you just lost?” you asked, trying to ignore the insidious thoughts invading your mind as you drank in his appearance. He was even more attractive up close like this, the musky scent of his cologne filling your senses.

His eyes darkened slightly, smile a bit more wolfish. “Beginner’s luck.”

Anger sparked in the pit of your stomach, burning from the inside. “Or was it your incompetency as a prosecutor?” you asked lightly, cocking your head to the side and feigning innocence. “It seemed that way when I destroyed your argument in court.”

He growled, low in his throat at this response, eyes glinting. “Destroyed? I don’t remember that happening when I refuted the majority of your claims. Call it…” he paused, pretending to think, “a happy coincidence?” 

Your blood boiled at his arrogant smile, crimson tinting your vision as he flashed that infuriating smile at you as he crossed his muscular arms across his chest. “A happy coincidence? When your arrogant, entitled ass couldn’t even figure out the simple, underlying story of who killed whom? It was a simple case, prosecutor. Some shallow black and white case college students are given to analyze. Yet you still lost, unanimously.”

His eyes flashed darkly, and you knew you had gotten under his skin. “Who are you, Ms. Public Defender?” He stepped forward, voice low. You refused to step back, eyes trained on his. “I’d never lost a case before.” Another step forward. “Until you.” The smell of his cologne was all around you now, your thoughts clouding. You were close enough to grab the lapels of his tailored suit, if you wanted to, and you wanted nothing more than to rip it off his body, immediately.

You had to tilt your head back slightly to look up at him now, his frame taking up most of your view. You were glad there wasn’t anyone in the hall anymore. You wrapped a hand around his tie and yanked him forward, teeth grazing his ear. “Don’t take what I’m about to do the wrong way, prosecutor,” you hissed, spitting his title as if it were a curse. Then you pushed him back, your eyes drifting down to his full, soft lips as blood roared in your ears.

He blinked, a small smile crawling along his lips. “Take what the wrong wa-”

And then you were kissing him, furiously taking out all the anger you had bottled up in court when he refuted nearly all of your claims out on his lips now, nipping at his full bottom lip. His lips were as pillowy as they looked, you thought, your hand reaching up to fist in the fabric covering his chest. When he began to say something, you took advantage of his open mouth, sweet peppermint breath mixing with yours, and slipped your tongue in to tangle with his, teasing him until he began to reciprocate with just as much fervor.

When you finally broke the kiss he was panting and breathless, pupils blown with lust. Just as you began to step back, his arm caught you behind your back, pulling you into his chest. His lips, swollen from your violent kiss, grazed your ear. “I’ve wanted to fuck you since you first stepped into the courtroom,” he growled, jaw clenched in restraint. “Don’t continue to do this to me unless you want the consequences.”

You could feel his bulge through the layers of clothing, throbbing against you. There wasn’t anything you wanted more. “Bathroom. Now.”

He didn’t hesitate, lifting you immediately and crashing through the doors of the bathroom, setting you harshly down on the cool marble of the counter. You pulled him in for another passionate kiss, heels digging into his back to push him closer into you, his bulge pushing deliciously into your crotch as your hands pushed his jacket off of his broad shoulders. An inferno grew in the pit of your stomach, growing uncomfortably warm, heat rushing down in between your legs. He moaned into your mouth, fingers gripping the edges of your blouse and ripping it open. The buttons flew and pinged against the floor but you had no patience to even complain.

“Hoseok,” he groaned in between needy, sloppy kisses against your jaw, your neck, “my name is Shin Hoseok.”

You pushed him backwards and slid off the counter, turning him with you so that your places were reversed, his back to the counter, and you dropped to your knees. “(Y/N),” you replied breathlessly as your fingers undid the buttons of his shirt, fingers grazing down his broad chest to the defined ridges of his abs. He shuddered under your touch, fingers gripping the edge of the counter so tightly his knuckles whitened. You fumbled with his belt for a second, and he let out a noise of impatience that traveled straight down to your core. Finally, you got that damned belt off of him and hurriedly yanked his pants down with his boxers, which pooled around his ankles.

He was big. Much bigger than you had expected. It sprang loose from the confines of his boxers and he hissed from the sudden feeling of cool air. Tentatively, you took him in your hand, your thumb and middle finger only barely able to touch one another. He bucked against your hand, groaning as he threw his head back. You looked up at him through your lashes. His head was thrown back, neck muscle tense and jaw clenched tightly, fingers digging into the counter as he swelled in your hand. You hadn’t even done anything yet. You licked a long, experimental stripe from the base to the tip, lapping up the beads of precum that had gathered there, tonguing at the slit. He tasted salty, a distinct edge to him that you had never tasted before. You licked another long stripe, from his balls to the tip.

Fuck,” he hissed darkly, hips canting. You hummed against him, licking and teasing, working your way up and down the curve of his thick cock, until finally he couldn’t take anymore, his fingers fisting almost painfully into your hair. “Did you forget how to suck cock, (Y/N)?” he asked, pressing the tip against your swollen, glistening lips. “I can remind you.”

You smirked, satisfied with his response, and opened your mouth wide to take him into your throat, sucking him down deep. You looked up at him with wide eyes, fingernails digging into the skin of his muscular thigh with each downward suck, your cheeks hollowing. A string of curses fell from his mouth as he watched you, your full, glistening, ruby red lips wrapped tight around him as you sucked obediently. His fingers threading their way into your hair so he could guide your head as you bobbed.

But you were still going too shallowly. He fingers tightened in your hair and shoved himself as far back into your throat as he could. You choked at the sudden intrusion, air escaping your lungs as he forced your head all the way down, groaning loudly. You moaned as the tip hit the back of your throat and gaggedas you relaxed your throat so he could slam you back down again to the base.

“Shit, you look so good with your lips wrapped around my cock,” he groaned, as you took him in again and again, your cheeks flushed pink, drool and precum dripping down out of the edges of your mouth as he fucked your face. The lewd sounds of him sliding in and out of your mouth echoed in the empty bathroom. “Just like that,” he hissed, hips bucking as you hummed against him, “so fucking good for me.” Just as you began to feel as if your throat could take no more abuse, Hoseok released you. You pulled off with a wet pop, breathless and wrecked.

A shiver of pleasure worked down to his groin upon seeing you like this, your clothes torn and ruined, lips swollen, hair mussed, with drool and his precum leaking from the corners of your mouth. “As much as I would like to finish in that pretty little mouth of yours,” he said as he yanked you up and bent you over the counter, switching positions again, “I know how much you must want me to fuck you.”

You could only let out a coarse mewl in agreement, pushing your hips outwards desperately.

He pushed your pencil skirt upwards and yanked your panties down impatiently. You let out a heady moan in response, wanting nothing more that for him to be fucking you until you forgot your name. He positioned himself at your dripping core, barely pushing the tip in. You cried out in abject frustration.

“Tsk, tsk, so wet already?” You could hear the smile in his voice as he leaned close, his muscled chest pressing against your bare back. “Who knew you would be so submissive to me?”

You almost cried in desperation from the lack of anything. “Please,” you begged hoarsely, “please.”

Hoseok nipped at your shoulder, chills erupting every place his full lips ghosted over. “Please what?” he murmured, pushing half an inch deeper.

You moaned at the feeling of being spread so infinitesimally wider, juices pooling between your legs, but he refused to move. Not even an inch. “Please fuck me already, Hoseok, fuck me!” you gasped, in almost a sob of sheer frustration.

He plunged his full length into you without warning, giving you no time to adjust to his large size. You swallowed a sharp cry of pain at the sudden fullness. The euphoric feeling of being so completely filled overrode all your other senses. He pistoned into you relentlessly, every thrust rocking you against the counter, the sound of skin slapping skin filling the room. “God, you’re so unbelievably tight,” he snarled, his hips smacking into yours with force that had you screwing your eyes shut, mouth gaping in a silent cry of ecstasy. Hoseok shoved three of his fingers into your mouth and you sucked on them gratefully, as they were the only things keeping you from screaming.

“What?” he growled, watching him fuck into you in the reflection of the mirror, your chin against your chest as your breasts bounced with each one of his deep thrusts. “Are you afraid someone will hear us? Someone will hear you mewling for me, begging for me to fuck you?” He continued to pound into you, almost animalistically, feeding the growing inferno flaming in the deep pit of your stomach, growing almost unbearably hot. “But you want to get caught, don’t you, (Y/N)? You want people to see you getting fucked like this in public, don’t you?”

He rolled his hips into yours deliciously. You felt delirious, only capable of moaning incoherently as you watched him fuck you. He was right, the high chance of the two of you getting caught and the thought that everyone could hear you only served to increase your arousal. As one of your hands drifted down to your clit, he grabbed it and pinned it behind you. “Only I am allowed to make you cum. Don’t touch yourself.” He pressed his cheeck agaisnt the side of your head, still maintaing eye contact with you in the mirror as he rammed himself into you, over and over. “I’ve wanted to fuck your pretty little ass since the second you stepped into the courtroom,” he rasped, “with that tight little skirt teasing me.”

You could only gasp as he continued to push into you, impossibly faster.

“I couldn’t even focus on my arguments, thinking about how pretty your pink mouth would look like wrapped tight around my cock.” He groaned lowly at his own words, sending vibrations throughout your entire body.

“Deeper, Hoseok, harder!” You were wrecked, your hair tousled, your cheeked pressed against the countertop as you arched your back for him to hit even deeper inside of you.

“Fuck,” he managed, snapping his hips. He pressed into the small of your back, forcing you to arch even further.

He hit a place in you that caused black to dance in your vision, sight blurring in front of you. “FUCK! HOSEOK!” You were sure the whole courthouse could hear you now, but you couldn’t care less.

“Found it,” he whispered. Hoseok repeatedly thrusted into the same place, over and over, and you felt the telltale prickles of your orgasm building, the coil in your stomach tightening even more.

“Oh god, oh god, oh god,” you cried, “harder, harder!” Hoseok released the hand he had pinned behind your back to grab onto your hips, lifting you and slamming you back down on him with every thrust. Low groans rumbled from his chest at every noise you made. You ruined him. He lost focus every time you clenched around him, desperately trying to milk out his orgasm.

Hoseok fisted a hand into your hair and yanked your head back, forcing you to look at your reflection. You barely recognized yourself in the mirror, eyes rolling back into your head in pleasure, drool trailing down the corner of your mouth. Hoseok caught your eyes in the mirror. “Watch me fuck you,” he snarled, his face next to yours in the reflection, hips slamming against yours and muscular chest pressed flush against your back as he fucked into you. A thin sheen of sweat covered his god-like body, jaw clenching in concentration as he buried himself into you again and again, never breaking eye contact with you the mirror. “You like watching me fuck you, (Y/N)?” He pulled your head to the side and sucked gently on the sensitive skin on your throat, causing chills to travel down your entire body and your knees to buckle.

“Hoseok-” you managed through breathy moans and gasps as you approached your high, “Hoseok, I’m going to come.”

Another wave of heat shot straight down to his groin upon hearing you say those words, your voice so breathy and needy for him. He reached down with one arm to rub circles on that sensitive nub. You cried out, your hand reaching up to dig into his muscular forearm, fingernails pressing in so deeply the nearly broke the skin.

“Scream my name,” he demanded, his own rhythm faltering as he neared his own orgasm, “I want to hear you.”

You screamed, white exploding in your vision as the coil in the pit of your stomach unraveled completely, pleasure igniting every nerve in your body, your entire body writhing in absolute euphoric satisfaction. “HOSEOK!” It was the strongest orgasm you had ever experienced, rocketing throughout your entire body in waves. Your finger nails dug so deeply into his forearm you drew blood. You don’t know how many times you screamed his name.

Hoseok stiffened behind you, body going taut like a bow as he released his heat into you, yanking your hips flush against his as he came. Ribbon after ribbon of his cum filled you and leaked out of your abused hole as he thrusted shallowly to ride out the rest of his orgasm. He groaned your name into your ear, dark and sexy. It sounded so right coming from him in that deep purr, claiming you as his.  

You remained trembling against the cold surface of the countertop for a few seconds before regaining any of your senses. The bathroom was silent except for the sound of your combined heavy breaths. Hoseok pulled out slowly. You heard him step away and reach to the side to pull out a wad of paper towels to soak up the cum dripping down your thighs.

His fingers were so gentle now. He was slow and careful, fingers trailing softly against the places where his hands had gripped you so tightly you bruised.

“I’ve got it,” you whispered, even though you wanted him to continue. You pushed yourself up from the counter as he stepped back.

The two of you redressed in a comfortable silence. Hoseok leaned back against the countertop as he buttoned his shirt and folded the cuffs back, a teasing smile on his lips.

You tried to ignore that flashing bright smile, sure that so many other girls had seen it before, instead busying yourself with the your ruined blouse. “Ah,” you whispered to yourself as you fumbled, “there’s really nothing I can do about these buttons…” You sighed, glancing at what remained of your blouse’s buttons scattered haphazardly around the floor. “You owe me a new shirt.” You glared pointedly at Hoseok, who choked out a surprised laugh.

He pushed away from the counter, reaching out to pull you in close again. All the breath escaped your lungs as he draped his suit jacket around you, buttoning it up slowly, his head bowing above yours as he fastened each button. “There,” he said, satisfied.

“Thanks,” you muttered drily, “but it doesn’t make up for a blouse.”

Hoseok laughed again, a sweet, gentle sound that contrasted so greatly with the rough sex you had just had. “Ok, Ms. Public Defender, I promise I will next time.”

Next time?  Your chest constricted at his words. But before you could open your mouth to make a snappy response, he cut you off.

“I’m sorry, (Y/N), but I guess I ‘took this the wrong way’.” His words may have simulated an apology, but there was nothing apologetic about his blinding smile. “Let’s not meet again like this. I want a date instead. How about I pick you up at 7 tomorrow, from where ever it is you live.”

You responded before you even realized. “8, and I’m going to your place.”

Hoseok’s grin widened. “See you in court.”

A/N: Forgive me, lord, for I have sinned. Requests for all groups are currently open! Feel free to drop a request (or just say hi!)

anonymous asked:

Headcanon for high school losers, Tall!Eddie and Short!Richie?

Than you, Anon. Just…. Thank you

(Modern, 17 year old Reddie)

  • So they’d walk down the hallway at school listening to Eddies Spotify playlist he made for himself and Richie, and he’d be teasing Richie about how far down the headphones dip and that it’s about to pull out of his ear cause “you’re just so damn tiny, Rich!”
  • Of course they’re listening to Just Like Heaven and Eddie would lean down and whisper “show me how you do that trick, the one that makes me scream” and Richie would giggle and try and shove Eddies shoulder with his own but totally misses and just ends up pushing Eddies elbow
  • The other losers try and banter with the two boyfriends about their height difference but Eddie’s not having any of it
  • “Hey Eddie, can you ask trashmouth how the weather is down there?” “shut up, Bev. I can say it. You can’t”
  • They’d be on Eddies bed, Richie laying down in between Eddies legs and they’d just be showing each other stupid photos and videos on their phone, but Eddie would keep saying stuff like “hold the phone a little higher, Richie!” or “I can’t see when I’m all the way up here!”
  • Richie would sulk and move to the other side of the bed but after a couple of minutes he’d feel lonely and crawl back into Eddie’s side
  • Eddie would be the little spoon
  • No questions asked
  • It’d make him feel safe and small being held in Richies arms at night
  • It’d make Richie feel so much bigger than he actually is and he loves that feeling because for once he feels like he’s not as tiny and vulnerable and he can actually protect Eddie

Short but sweet - I hope this is something of what you had in mind!


Christopher Lee vs. Gregory Peck in Captain Horatio Hornblower (1951)

(for @swiftsnowmane)

Who else self ship themselves with Cayde?

lets go down, together

Too Tall

Pairing: Sam x Reader

Warnings: Language, drinking, bullying, bar guys being assholes, passionate kissing

Word Count: 1482

A/N: This was supposed to be a drabble but apparently, my head doesn’t know what that means. I apparently can’t write anything under 1000 words lol. This is my first Sam fic that wasn’t like sisterly so tell me what you think. Also, my first request yay!

Request: Oo oo oo! I gotta request for a drabble! Sam comforts a tall (preferably female) reader? Cause I’m 5'11 and get made fun of for my height all the time. (Ps, not sure if this is what you meant, if not feel free to ignore it) - Anon

^ so like they are not this rough in the story but how Sam places his hands on her face correlates to the story 

Keep reading

Compsognathus would be a great choice or Archeopteryx, something that would eat rats and keep them out of the stores.”
“Could you fire Compsognathus like grape shot at your enemies and then have them run rampant?”
“I would insist. What you would do us when you came alongside for your broadside you just send a few of them up the mast and then run along the spars and then they’d hop on to the other boat. And then they’d be like *dinosaur noise* right in the other captains eyes. And then I’d walk over and be all hahaha having trouble with your eyes, Sir? And they'd be like ‘sacre bleu!’, because it’s Napoleonic wars and everyone speaks French.
—  Luke Westaway, @outsidextra & Mike Channell, @outsidexboxofficial

So the preamble: Question for Luke here from Furko08… If Luke was the captain of a Napoleonic era ship which dinosaurs would be his first choice to have as his crew?
The background. Lukes two favourite things are tall ships and dinosaurs. This is the best most ridiculous question to him.

This is from their Splatoon 2 and Saurian livestream at about the 1:19:00 mark

anonymous asked:

omg that stilinski house post. the fish. the sad concrete slab. is there any chance we can see your ideas about the hale house?

Okay, this one is really not going to be that heavily tied to what we see in the show, because I kind of hate it. Granted, all we’ve seen of the Hale House is its burned remains, the front hall, and like half a room, but I still hate it, because like so many things in Teen Wolf, they had the beginnings of something really cool, and then they half-assed it in pretty much every way.

The exterior of the house is kind of a lazy Second Empire style, but weirdly short and wide considering the entire point of the style is to make things seem very tall and narrow. Even shot from below like this, when it should seem like it’s towering over you and being ominous, it just looks like the dumpy uncle of an actual Second Empire style house.

The floors aren’t tall enough and there isn’t enough space between the windows on the first and second level. The way they have it, the second floor windows would start like six inches off the floor, and the walls would be maybe like six feet tall. You could say that the fire made the wood compact and shrink, but it still looked too short in that one shot of the house on fire. 

Even without all the ornamentation, look how much nicer the proportions are on the right. It’s tall and stately, and doesn’t look like it’s trying to disappear into its own turtleneck and hide from the world.

And on the topic of ornamentation, the Hale House is depressingly bland, so to make myself feel better, I’m going to say that it was more ornate and all of the great details burned off. Because I’ve always considered the Hales to be a founding family of Beacon Hills–which probably would’ve been founded late 19th century–and wealthy founding families didn’t half-ass their homes back then. Even if set builders on MTV shows do.

Moving on.

Directly inside the front door is the foyer.

I hate this foyer. 

It’s a very stupid, very large foyer to put in a house this size, and it doesn’t fit the exterior, because the window above the front door implies there’s a room there. There are shades on it, it’s not very grand–it’s not one of those windows in a two story foyer that’s pretty much only there to frame a gaudy chandelier. This type of two story foyer also cuts out a massive part of the second story they could be using for rooms. 

So, to the right of the foyer looks like the dining room. Do your best to ignore a shirtless Derek; it’s the only decent shot of that room I could find.

Remember that Kate was about to come threaten him. It’s not sexy, it’s sad. Focus on the house.

On the other side of the foyer is the living room, and I get angry.

The way they divided up the house makes no sense. Half the ground floor is one large room, leaving everything else like the kitchen, dining room, storage, etc. to be crammed into the other half. But it’s not just a giant living room, because before you get to the living room, there’s a random hallway for no reason with a couple very shallow steps of a tripping hazard.

Where does this hallway go? What is its purpose? It’s not wide enough to be a room, so it has to lead somewhere at the back of the house, but that is the back of the house, unless the living room has double double doors to a study behind it that completely burned to nothing…while still leaving the doors intact. And then someone stole the doorknobs.

So based on what we’ve seen, this is the approximate downstairs Hale House floor plan:

Which is dumb and a bad Sims design. It could extend back further on the right, with a bigger kitchen and a bathroom or something back behind the foyer, but if it does, then only the ground floor does, because the second floor stops at the top of the stairs.

(Side note: Why is this house so lopsided? I’m all for asymmetry when it’s done right, but this just looks really shitty! They made the left side wider, but didn’t do anything to the right side to visually balance it out!)

Oh, and upstairs? There’s a railing on the left, so the hallway continues around the foyer of wasted space, and to the right looks like there would be a hallway. 

Only turn to the right and it’s literally just a wall and an old rusty bed frame.

Does that hallway wrap around to the right? If it does, I hate it, because then you have something like this. Which sucks and is inefficient, and I hate bathrooms with no windows. 

So, changes I would make:

Literally everything.

First, bring the right side of the house forward to help balance out the asymmetry, and to make the dining room larger. Big family, big dinners, they’re going to need more space than that rinky dink dining room they had. Add some windows for more ornamentation on the exterior to give it some visual weight, and you’re golden.

Then I’d put the staircase against the wall in the foyer and make the foyer narrower too. The only reason it was so wide was to fit the doorways on either side of the stairs, which was pointless and stupid. That makes more room on the second floor, and if the house extends out back more, you can easily fit four good sized bedrooms. Do the same on the third floor (but with smaller rooms because of the mansard roof) and bam! Big family house for werewolves!

Also lose the terrible wallpaper. 

I just can’t take the Hales seriously knowing that was on their walls.

Stranger in the night

TITLE: Stranger in the night


AUTHOR: mad-about-britain

ORIGINAL IMAGINE: Imagine while walking downtown you meet jazz musicians playing on the street. The singer is tall man with raven hair dressed in the black suit sings as though he was born in the jazz era. He watched you, his new big fan, the entire time he was singing. Later when the street becomes empty and there is no one but you listening to the musicians, he lead you in the slow dance humming the song in your ear. It certainly wasn’t a bad idea to move to this city.


NOTES/WARNINGS: I linked the titles of the songs in the story for those who may not heard them before :)

New city, new life… you thought while walking in the city centre. You moved here recently and everything was new to you. It didn’t look like the place you lived before. Old buildings, little streets with small cosy cafes were feeling like home. It almost looked like the XIX century though people with phones were distracting.

You wandered on the quite little street with few cosy cafes when you heard the soft sound of saxophone. You were walking to the sound of it and saw a group of people. You approached the group and stand in the front row so you could see the artist. There were two men – saxophonist and singer. You watched at the singer and unconsciously decided to stay here to the end. He was dressed in the black suit with shirt and tie in the same colour. His raven hair was carefully laid behind his ears. This whole scene was like from the 1940s and you even couldn’t think about going away. There weren’t any benches so people had to stand. You, though, decided to stay for long so you just sat down on the brick road with legs bended in knees and crossed.

Keep reading