talking to the mirror

I was really struggling this week. Working way too hard, skipping breaks and meals, not staying hydrated, not showering, not taking my meds. it was bad. even at the busiest times, self-care is so so important. if I needed help, then I’m probably not the only one. all of these lil ideas are small and relatively easy and I highly doing something nice for yourself, even if it’s not on the list. hope you all have a wonderful day/week/year. 

(my personal favourites in bold)

  1. drink some cold water
  2. wash your hands and face with cool water
  3. make some tea
  4. get a blanket and snuggle it around you
  5. snuggle an animal/stuffed animal
  6. buy your favorite candy from the gas station
  7. close your eyes and listen to your fav song on repeat for 10 mins
  8. put on some throwback jams (high school musical, mamma mia, 90s, u do u) and dance around ur room in ur undies 
  9. make a calming playlist
  10. call a friend/relative just to say hi and hear someone else’s voice
  11. rewatch cute/funny/happy clips from ur fav tv show/band/movie on youtube
  12. put on a skirt and twirl (yes boys/agenders/trans u can do this too)
  13. scribble really hard with black pen on a blank page and scream
  14. look at the sky/moon/sunset/sunrise/stars
  15. write
  16. watch kitten/puppy/small animal live streams on youtube
  17. go outside, even if its just by ur front door, and take some deep breaths
  18. eat something - fruit, veggies are best
  19. change ur contacts/clean ur glasses if you wear those
  20. change your underwear
  21. if u can’t get urself to shower, wash off w a damp washcloth/baby wipe
  22. put on a cute/comfy outfit that makes you feel good about urself
  23. dont put eye makeup on so you can rub your eyes & they wont feel heavy
  24. stretch, do some yoga or meditate
  25. get a breathing/meditation app and use it (headspace is gr8)
  26. take a nap
  27. go to bed before 11 pm
  28. brush your teeth
  29. turn off bright harsh lights and use smaller, warmer lamps
  30. unplug. give your eyes/brain a break from screens for a half hour
  31. get one of those pet/family apps/games and care for someone else for a change
  32. find cool people on tumblr and send them anonymous compliments (that you actually think are true - spread love)
  33. find a quote, write it/print it nicely and stick it on ur wall
  34. watch a new movie
  35. boil some cinnamon sticks/vanilla bean for 5 mins so ur house smells pretty. if in ur room, use essential oil drops or candles
  36. make your bed
  37. vacuum 
  38. wipe down ur desk w some disinfectant
  39. clean something - a backpack, small area, fluff ur pillow, put away one shirt
  40. do your makeup all pretty and nice just because/dress up just because
  41. research into your dream job/vacation/city/whatever
  42. open up pages/canva/photshop/etc and make something just for fun
  43. build a fort and crawl under it
  44. find an easy diy and do it/ be proud of ur creative genius
  45. make a list of things that make you happy. stick it somewhere you’ll see it all the time
  46. print a picture of someone/thing that’s pissing u off and throw things at it (tape it to a dart board if u have one)
  47. reread a book that makes you happy
  48. clip your nails, clean the dirt from under them
  49. send some good old fashioned snail mail to someone u like just for fun
  50. take some selfies if you’re feelin it (see #40)
  51. fuzzy socks. enough said. 
  52. make yourself a fancy meal/cocktail/coffee/tea latte/drink/whatevs
  53. open ur window or put on a fan/air purifier. get some air circulating
  54. draw, even if u think u suck. 
  55. reach out to kids help phone (canada) or a suicide hotline if you need to talk to someone about more serious matters. you deserve help and care and support. (message me if you need resources)
  56. donate to a local animal shelter (if u have the means obviously)
  57. go for a walk/run/bike ride
  58. put on a face mask
  59. take a bubble path
  60. shave ur legs and moisturize
  61. moisturize 
  62. bake some cookies
  63. go on spotify/youtube and find some new music you love
  64. make a really fun upbeat playlist for next time u get the aux cord
  65. scroll through some wholesome or funny meme accounts. whatever you’re in the mood for. 
  66. take some cool pictures of whatever you want
  67. change up your room in any small ( or big) way that you can
  68. teach urself a new skill on youtube (simple like a hair style, or complicated like an instrument, whatever u want)
  69. sign up to volunteer at a library/homeless shelter/soup kitchen/retirement home/daycare center/etc. help those who need it. be giving. 
  70. put on sad music and cry. let ur mascara run. be dramatic. let it out.
  71. put rock music on and stomp and scream throw (soft) things. let it out. 
  72. teach urself the words to a fast rap song thats cool right now so you can impress ur friends/classmates/family
  73. print off some kid colouring pages and dont stay inside the lines
  74. brush your hair, take it out of a ponytail if its been like that for a while, or put it up if its down and in ur way
  75. diy a hair mask (coconut oil) and do that
  76. exfoliate ur whole body and feel like a whole new person
  77. clear out ur phone/laptop. delete old messages, numbers of people u dont like/hang out with, get rid of photos of shitty friends, apps u dont use, etc
  78. find cards against humanity online (or if u have it use the cards) and play with urself - make funny matches just because
  79. empty a drawer (or multiple) and fold ur stuff neatly
  80. do something that will make u sweat (gym, dance, clean) then take a nice shower
  81. take a second to listen to ur body. unclench muscles that are clenched, fix ur poster, massage/stretch tight areas
  82. move to a different area of the house for a little while. clear ur head. 
  83. go out, anywhere. window shop, go to a coffee shop/library and work. people watch if ur broke. 
  84. update your planner
  85. make Pinterest board/real life vision of things that make you happy for when in this situation again
  86. find a youtuber you like and watch their videos
  87. lie on the floor, listen to music and do nothing for a while
  88. give yourself a pep talk in the mirror and then stand like superman for a few mins. sounds silly but it works. its called powerposing. look it up. 
  89. repeating this bc important: hydrate!!!
  90. start a new tv show
  91. order something online so u have something to look forward to
  92. go sit with a family member and keep them company. u dont have to talk to them. 
  93. the app ‘trump dump’ will make u feel better about the current us political situation
  94. read happy news: find stories of students doing something cool, women kicking ass, men being amazing, whatever. bonus points if this inspires u
  95. sort your garbage from recycling and help the environment
  96. smile at people you see just because. smiling is good and nice. 
  97. look at old pictures of u and ur fav people
  98. go through old yearbooks and take a second to appreciate how far you’ve come
  99. go to a park and watch kids play. remember what it’s like to be young. realize you are still young. go on the swings and go as high as u can
  100. play in a sandbox just because u still can

xo soph

so recently i made a hella long thread on why otabek and yuri are so important for each other + how beka is also yura’s agape, and now i’m migrating it here bc i love character studies // @otayuriwriterscollective


my friend linked me to this otayuri on ice vid on facebook and i got to thinking about how important they are for each other as people and as skaters because they are, and especially in yura’s case because beka is actually another form of agape in his life

think about otabek altin, thirteen years old, in a country that is not home, struggling so hard to keep up; otabek who was forced to come to terms w a bitter truth that he has no flexibility, no inherent grace and elegance; whose execution and technique are far from perfect. how alone and out of place does he feel in a ballet training camp, knowing he can’t do these things? how frustrated at himself and at the people around him, how angry – if he wants to skate (and he does, he really does) these are things he has to do… and he cannot. 

and then he sees yura: strong, proud and ambitious yura, who has the technique he envies, the grace and style he covets, who isolates himself with his attitude & talent; he sees yura, and maybe beka falls a little bit in love. maybe he decides that he wants to stay on the ice, so he can cross paths with this boy again someday. 

and beka takes himself to canada, to america, across a whole ocean just to keep skating – to find a way he can skate that suits him, that will take him where he wants to go; to prove there’s more than one way to skate, to win.  and always in the back of his mind is that boy with sunshine hair and fierce eyes; he keeps up with yura, watches him win, lets that fuel him to keep going, keep skating: one day they will meet on the ice, and he’s going to be ready with a challenge (and maybe a confession). because beka has never doubted that yura will go far, that yura will be something great, and otabek wants to be able to stand on equal ground when they do meet; he wants yura to see him, not just walk by at another competition, yura’s eyes on someone else, yura not knowing he exists.

and yura? brash and uncertain yura, so insecure, so desperate for validation (refer to this thread for a discussion of yura’s character) –  just like his grandfather, yura finds his agape in beka, because beka’s love and admiration are just that: unconditional. they aren’t predicated on anything other than yura, aren’t reliant on the perfection of his skating, on the image the other person has of him. beka sees yura as just yura: talented, insecure, uncertain, determined, and ambitious. and beka loves all of it. he doesn’t want to mold yura into something else – not a prima ballerina, not an angel, not a fairy, not another viktor nikiforov. when yura comes to him on the night before the exhibition skate, with his ideas, asking for his help, beka just smiles and says: that’s the yuri plisetsky i want to see – the image of yuri that yuri himself determines; young, tempestuous, unbridled, and strong. the way yuri wants to define himself. beka faces yura and gives him the acknowledgment and validation he’s been asking for all his life, something that no one – not viktor, yuuri, yakov, lilia – has never quite given him.

beka takes him seriously. and more than that, beka sees everything of him and loves him anyway. even goes along with his outrageous skate idea.

and even the way beka confesses: yuri plisetsky had the unforgettable eyes of a soldier; acknowledging that strength, that struggle,   and echoing it in his own journey, the way he has fought tooth & nail for every scrap of talent, pushed himself past everything to stand where the world will acknowledge his skating, where he can prove there are more ways to fight on the ice.

for the first time yuri has someone who sees him as an equal and not as someone to be used (ahem viktor), as someone to be molded into something else, as someone not quite enough; and yura is beka’s inspiration, because beka wants to meet yura on equal terms on and off the ice.

and i love how they show each other off, look for each other on the ice, search each other out, trust each other; i love how beka doesn’t mind that yura’s preoccupied with himself and doesn’t quite return his obvious admiration in equal measure; i love how beka lets yura explore and just be his age, be himself, without asking for anything in return; and i love how yura lets himself be uncertain and vulnerable with beka, be a little weak, be honest of his own initiative.

and beka gets that right now yura’s still frustrated from the gpf, still figuring out himself and his own emotions, and so he’s fine with yura not reciprocating or even realizing beka’s feelings, bc he’s admired yura for 5 years and now he gets the chance to stand beside this boy and yura sees him – that is more than enough, for now, for him, and he will simply be there for yura and let yura be honest, be insecure, be himself. and yura loves him for that (and perhaps for something more)

favourite parts of beauty and the beast

  • THE INTRO AND THE WAY IT ZOOMS INTO THE CASTLE AND THE ORIGINAL INTRO MUSIC PLAYING IN THE BACKGROUND LIKE FUCK ME UP
  • THE FUCKING SCENERY. LIKE SAME WITH CINDERELLA I HAVE DECIDED THAT THE LIVE REMAKES OF ALL THE DISNEY FILMS ARE THE ABSOLUTE BEST AND IT’S BECAUSE OF THE SCENERY
  • THE CGI IN THIS FILM IS A FUCKING MASTERPIECE OK
  • “trust me ladies…it’s never going to happen”
  • THE BE OUR GUEST SCENE
  • literally lefou. everything about him made this fucking film
  • “i just realised i’m illiterate and i’ve never had to spell it out loud before”
  • ALSO WAS THAT A BI MAN I SPIED WITH MY LITTLE EYE DURING THE “how is your wife” SCENE
  • “are you busy” “no”
  • père robert being a fuckign badass
  • stanley tucci. enough said
  • “i want adventure in the great wide somewhere, i want it more than i can tell” like that whole scene gave me chills the way she’s standing on the top of the hill and you can see down into all the little valleys it’s so magical
  • THE DESIGN OF THE CASTLE LIKE IT WAS SO ASTOUNDING I COULD BARELY BREATHE
  • IAN FUCKING MCKELLEN
  • “please turn back into a clock. please turn back into a clock”
  • EMMA THOMPSON LADIES AND GENTLEMEN
  • when belle says that her favourite shakespeare play is rom and jules and the beast is like “why is that not a surprise”
  • THE LIBRARY SCENE
  • “was that a joke? are you making jokes now?”
  • gaston talking to himself in the mirror
  • “you are the most gorgeous thing i’ve ever seen. nobody deserves you” same buddy same
  • “i’m not done with you yet” “me neither”
  • CHIP. IS. THE. SWEETEST
  • belle throwing a snowball at the beast and he’s just like “right” and fuckign decks her
  • THE WHOLE MRS. POTTS AND LEFOU SCENE
  • “we’re in a bad place right now” “you’re too good for him anyway”
  • THE TALE AS OLD AS TIME SCENE WHEN THE LIGHTS COME DOWN FROM THE CIELING FUC K ME UP
  • “happy place, gaston, happy place”
  • “the widows!” “oh, the widows”
  • “are there any other tasteless demands you wish to make upon my artistry?” “no, that’s it”
  • garderobe changing the three thugs and one of them looking fucking fabulous
  • LEFOU AND THE THUG DANCING AT THE BALL
  • “have you ever considered growing a beard?”
  • HIS FUCKING GROWL AT THE END