7 years ago my father committed suicide, some of you might have known about this since I wrote about it here. I always wish someone could have warned me about it, because I was so foolish back then.
In that Saturday I travelled back home to see him smilling and funny teasing, I thought he finally recovered. Little did I knew that would be his last smile that I will ever saw. My father has depression for 5 years and was always always sad, theres no such thing like recover over night. Its the sign that he gave up and determined to do it, I only learnt about this from some mental health article later on.
His office always opened, but around two weeks before he killed himself in that very office, he shut himself inside it. All alone in that dark room, all along. But his coworkers said nothing to us, his family. Perhaps ignorance is a bliss, people have no idea about mental illness back then.
It would really break my heart if any of you has suicidal thought. I want you to at least think, that even though Im a stranger, I WILL SURELY CRY so please just wait. Talk. Tell us. Anything.
If you have friend who has such thought and you’re worried, tell me too, I will spread the word with everything I have.
1993 MTV Video Music Awards: The night’s biggest winner was Pearl Jam, whose video for “Jeremy“ earned four awards that night, including Video of the Year.
"Hey everybody, this is Trevor, he lives. No, I mean, I guess you gotta say thanks. No, the real shit is, I mean, I don’t, if it weren’t for music, I think I would’ve shot myself in the front of the classroom, you know? It really is what kept me alive, so this is kind of full circle. So to the power of music, you know? Thanks!”
“You know that R.E.M song?That’s all about what I was talking about. Trying to stay alive through the crap. Maybe music is the one thing that keeps you alive or something. It’s like you should probably thank, you know? I would thank Pete Townshend, I would thank Henry Rollins and Ian from Fugazi. I’d thank all these people for giving me something to live. A reason cuz life can, you know? This modern world, it can be kinda crazy, kinda fucked up, make you wanna kill yourself. I relate to that. Music saved my soul.”
- Eddie Vedder talking about music in his acceptance speech and an interview after the show.
so mercy was a good person who may have done bad things for good reasons , but blizzard was like “uhhhhhh no she’s PERFECT ANGEL WITH NO CHARACTER DEPTH SHES JUST GOOD OKAY” *shoves half the lore into a pit and throws new evil doctor at us*
I’m halfway through it and I just love how well it’s going. I honestly think this is going to be one of the best, most cohesive chapters I’ve written and I just really hope it gets a positive reaction.
I want to preface this by saying that I LOVE LOVE LOVE absolutely everyone who comments on my fanfictions. I work really hard on my stories and it makes me unbelievably happy when people take the time to tell me that they liked it. However, recently one particular commenter (I don’t know if they follow me, if so, not under the same username) has taken to commenting less than constructive criticism.
I have a lot to say about this, so more under the cut.
honestly the past week or two have been extremely taxing on me. like really im being stretched mentally/physically/emotionally and all but bang yongguk DID THAT. he really went on instalive and then on v app for an hour??
BLESS THAT MAN REALLY.
I’m instantly feeling much better?? Even my sister commented i havent smiled that much in 2 weeks as compared to an hour ago during his vlive.
Series Summary: You’re a general surgeon in the Kansas General Hospital. Everything goes great, you’re incredible at your job, but the thing that you lack are friends. It changes when a new surgeon, Sam Winchester, shows up at the hospital.
Word Count: 2124
Characters: Sam Winchester, Dean Winchester
Pairing: Doctor!Sam x Doctor!Reader
Warnings/Tags: a bit of angst, fluff, Sam’s POV, mentions of past Dean/Lisa
Unbeta’d so all the mistakes are mine!
A/N: This one’s from Sam’s POV, so I really hope you’re going to enjoy a bit of a different perspective. Let me know what you think! (And I think we’re slowly nearing the end of this series, guys!)
If you want to be tagged/untagged in everything or only some stuff, simply let me know or add yourself to this tag sheet! (Tags at the bottom of the post, those that are crossed out mean that Tumblr didn’t let me tag you.)
Feedback very welcome and highly appreciated. Feel free to check out my Masterlist andor Commissions if this piece leaves you wanting more :)
I rushed away from the ORs, shooting smiles to all the people on my way. As much as I wanted to punch something or go somewhere and yell as loudly as it was in my power, I decided to get back onto Cardiology Ward and check on my patients.
Maybe I was too harsh to Dean. After all, I didn’t know anything about what had happened after I had ran away, but was it really a good idea to talk to him?
for the pairing + au ask meme: mckirk + role reversal
Dear God I didn’t even know I needed this until now.
Jim as a young, bright CMO. He’s really good at his work, with steady hands and he’s incredibly resourceful, but he’s also incredibly reckless when it comes to his own safety. He’d run head first into danger in order to save a young ensign from bleeding to death.
Captain McCoy would be so stressed about this that he’s taken a rank in healing. And when Jim inevitably goes down (and he does, more than once), Bones can sit at his side, listening to Jim’s instructions and patching him up whilst his doctor slips in and out of consciousness.
Bones would frequently point out that, according to Starfleet Regulations, rather than beaming into danger, they could also just leave. And he has done that, refusing to send his crew down to fetch a stupid artifact for the sole purpose of having it in Starfleet’s possession. He’s gotten very skilled at ignoring Jim’s: “C’mon Cap, what’s the worst that could happen? I’ll go down with them. It’ll be fun!”
Despite being in the heat of danger way more often than a doctor should, Jim gets out of most missions without ever killing another life. The day that he does kill, it’s to save his Captain’s life, who’s face-to-face with a gigantic alien who’s killed at least three ensigns already, and the remaining away-party crew is occupied with other aliens. The creature doesn’t respond to a stun, and Jim has no choice. It weighs heavily on his shoulders that he’s killed someone, and for the longest time he’s lost that spark in his eyes Bones just adores about him. It doesn’t return until Bones tells him Jim’s phaser misfired, and it was actually Bones who killed the thing. This may or may not be a lie.
Bones visits Jim in medbay at least once a week with severe headaches. Jim diagnoses him with severe stress all the time and tells him to take it slow. Cue to them bickering about whose fault it is that Bones is just a permanently stressed Captain.
Bones also frequently visits Jim in medbay to keep his own medical skill up to date, and mostly to listen to Jim’s stories. He’d just sit in Jim’s office, watching Jim speak so vividly and excitedly about this exotic alien he saved from getting his arm amputated. Or how he helped a woman give birth amidst this big sandstorm on this Class M planet. And just hearing Jim talk so excitedly about saving lives just makes him fall so madly in love with him every time, despite the unnecessarily gory details.
Eventually, he just visits medbay with fake illnesses so that he can have Jim look him over. Careful fingers touching his arms, his forehead, or wherever his current illness takes place. Though after Bones’ vitals are fine three times in a row, Jim catches on. He makes up some terrible fake diagnosis to scare the hell out of Bones, though subtly suggesting making out to be the only cure. Bones happily accepts, and visits medbay with the same symptoms a lot more often.