Jason having an episode of psychosis and confirmed depression/low-key suicidal in rhato 9 is very, very important. No more pretending and all the fake n52 happiness. And Jason was so calm about it, probably because it wasn’t the first time it happened
I love the whole “Humans are the Weird Aliens” stuff but, like, consider.
One of our future goals in medicine is to be able to perform transplants with no problems, and many people donate their dead bodies for such a thing. Furthermore, we’re resilient as a species and won’t lose a fight until we die.
So a few hundred years from now, we’re integrated into the galactic community, and you don’t want to fuck with a human. Even if you cut they’re arm off, they’ll just take the severed arm and beat you to death with it, and then go to a hospital to get an arm donated by a dead guy grafted on as a replacement.
Consider the idea that maybe only Earth Life naturally produces adrenaline and the rest of the Galactic community treats it like a drug. Imagine having your non-human friend suggesting you go to rehab for your “problem” not realizing it’s literally a biological function?
I’ve seen stuff like Death People and Space Orcs but to be honest we’ll probably be considered more like Drugged Up Death Orcs.
give me hufflepuff boys; big hands and soft lips and ready to encase you with warmth and love whenever you’re in need. hufflepuff boys, strong and cheerful, but most of all kind and understanding, full of ideas and loveliness! hufflepuff boys with envious long lashes, fluttering as they send you a wink. give me hufflepuff boys who are fair and loyal, boys who aren’t afraid to love the weak and make a claim against all odds. hufflepuff boys who watch you sail away with your kite, apple-red cheeks and a soft curve to their lips. hufflepuff boys who are hardworking and dedicated, stopping at nothing toearn what they deserve. because hufflepuff boys deserve everything.
give me slytherin boys with blazing eyes; full of desire and the need for control. slytherin boys with mischievous grins, looking back at you in the dark while dragging you forward; your hand in theirs and you’re feeling fire. because slytherin boys are mysterious and beautiful and full of something you want to know better. because they are the children your parents warned you about. give me slytherin boys who are persistent and stubborn; constantly trying to prove a point, because they are compassionate and fighters. give me slytherin boys who want no more than a love to ground them to earth, to make them realize that they are wonderful, that they are not their parents. because beneath those plates of silver armor, there lies a battered, stitched heart. and all it takes is a single heart-beat to revive it.
give me gryffindor boys with darling, crooked smiles. gryffindor boys who run in the rain, laughing and shouting. give me gryffindor boys, making friends for life; trusting them in a second because all they want is another companion, another person to grow with. gryffindor boys who take strides in big lengths, trying to intimidate little ones but failing miserably as they trip over someone else’s steps. gryffindor boys with loud voices that fill up an empty room, storing memories that will never be forgotten. give me gryffindor boys with crushes left-and-right, falling faster than a raindrop from the sky. gryffindor boys who give their everything to feel happy. because gryffindors love with a love that was so much more than love.
give me ravenclaw boys with wide grins. ravenclaw boys who bite their lips so intently as they concentrate, it turns into a luscious red, ravenclaw boys with a million thoughts racing through their head, not a single second to spare before writing them down. because ravenclaw boys want to know everything, everything before it’s snatched away in an instant. give me ravenclaw boys who are shy and quiet, but are incredibly thunderous and competitive once their hearts are in play. incredible. ravenclaw boys who would rather spend their nights learning how to hatch a dragon than studying because it’s fascinating. ravenclaw boys who are wise and will give advice, without you asking. because ravenclaws are everything there is to being phenomenal.
chat noir will
drape himself over ladybug’s lap during the downtime on their nightly patrols and
moan about how awful plagg is just for some head scratches from ladybug (let’s
be honest, plagg taught the kitty well; complain and receive cheese/ladybug)
they once spent
an afternoon atop the notre dame after an akuma attack critiquing civilian’s
fashion choices. both learned that their partner has excellent taste in fashion.
ladybug: “oh my
god is that a man bun? those things should be burned.”
chat noir: “who
the hell wears crocs anymore? they look like shit, and they make your feel
smell. god, shoes have three deciding factors: quality, price, and style. crocs
have the rare combination of being expensive, poor quality, and being ugly. it’s
quite a feat for one shoe to suck this much. i will judge anyone who wears crocs.”
ladybug uses chat noir as a mannequin to measure some of her designs during their downtime.
frequent arguments over akuma names because some are too stupid to say aloud. ladybug
believes in creativity and free will and vows to let the akumas keep the names
they declare themselves with. chat noir files petitions to change many of them
because he absolutely refuses to admit he nearly got beat by a Mr. Pigeon.
if ladybug and
chat noir are literally anywhere
together outside in public without an akuma, someone’ll always ask, “are you
two together? are you on a date?”. chat has to hold ladybug back from
stakeouts, chat noir sings “99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall” and has gotten to 1
before, even though it usually ends up with him getting pitched off a roof.
morning, there was an akuma battle, and chat noir learned that ladybug has bad
bed head. he makes sure to keep a comb in his pocket now at all times for
whenever there’s an early battle, and ladybug doesn’t have time to fix her hair
before going to school. she doesn’t say it, but she’s really thankful. (also
really jealous because tikki, pockets,
give me pockets, god fucking damn it)
one time there
was a mermaid akuma in the seine and chat noir fell in the water and revealed
he couldn’t swim. ladybug saved him and made him take swimming lessons. nothing
beats coming to sunday morning swimming lessons and finding one of paris’s
famous superheros with floaties and a kick board.
you can bet your
ass that ladybug constantly makes “a cat to water” jokes every second she can.
ladybug keeps a
tally of how many puns chat noir makes. his gets to 162 in one night before she
sets a limit of 10 puns per day. he breaks it all the time and has to wear the
Collar of Shame™ for the rest of the day, which is black collar with a huge
pink bow. (ladybug thinks he secretly likes it).
actually hates ladybug’s puns and buys her the “Punning for Dummies” book for Christmas.
she gets him “31
Ways Not To Be A Douchebag”.
actually know how to use a real yo-yo. chat noir laughs for two weeks.
ladybug and chat
noir regularly attend movies as themselves because no one really knows why the
superheroes are going to the movies, but it probably means there’s an akuma or
something equally bad so let’s just not
go. it just means they get the best seats every time.
they’re really tired and stressed out, and ladybug is being bossy and chat noir
is fed up with hearing it, he’ll say, “okay, deborah” which causes her to pitch him off the eiffel tower.
chat noir can
never get into a hammock. he always flips over every time he tries to get on
one time ladybug
flubbed a back handspring, and the news stations got it live. chat noir plays
it on repeat for a week.
Warnings: drinking, sexist behavior? Mild violence mentioned, very subtle mention of sexy times.
Word Count: 3.3k
A/N: This was supposed to be a short one, but eh. I’ve been living in the land of heavy angst with You are My Heaven and intense stress in my real life so when this fun, fluffy idea popped up, I ran with it. I’m working on a lot of other stuff so be patient, please! As always, I appreciate your feedback. Love each and every one of you!!
“You wanna bet?” Clint challenged the redhead across the table from him.
Natasha leaned forward and held his gaze, not an ounce of doubt in her demeanor. “Absolutely.”
It was too early in the morning for this childish banter, you thought from your seated position at the far end of the long kitchen table. You slumped forward, dipping the tea bag in and out of the steaming mug of liquid before you, then setting it on the small saucer beside it. Wrapping your hands around the cup’s warmth, your eyes unfocused as you continued to tune out the blathering of your teammates. The only other person in the room paying them no mind was Bucky, who was slouched in a cozy chair, thoroughly engrossed in a book.
“Now wait a minute,” a third voice joined the argument, “If we’re gonna do this, we gotta level the playing field a little. Nat could do this in her sleep. We need someone a little more…down to earth. How about Y/N?” Sam gestured toward you.
Blinking a few times, you finally broke out of your stupor. “Hey! I was only half listening to your stupidity, but I think I’m offended.”