take this text off

[Unable to find Steve, Bucky or T’Challa] 

Natasha: Well, this calls for drastic measures. *proceeds to yank Tony’s pants down, causing Tony to shriek and Clint to scream in the distance*

Tony: Why the fuck -

Natasha: *cups her hands together* Tony has his pants down!

[sound of a stampede getting closer, children screaming, babies crying, women fainting, and men turning gay as Steve, Bucky & T’Challa run towards them]

Natasha: There they are. 

Tony: *glaring and struggling to pull his pants back up* Couldn’t you have done that without actually pulling my pants down? 

Natasha: I like the view.

i don’t care about waking up to a person i love, i wanna wake up to a new song of my favorite artist for the rest of my life

I alternate between drawing the Batter with hair and without as the picture demands and I was talking to my sister about it once and she’s pretty sure he’s bald and while that makes sense I still picture what he’d look like if you removed his hat then and I’m just like

Put it back.

Dianne Bentley saved receipts, helped take down her cheating governor husband.

The text copy, of course, leaves out all pics and formatting, (not to mention being unnecessarily laborious and time-wasting) but you can google a sentence or two to find the source (mic.com).

“When male politicians do shitty things, their wives are generally expected to stand quietly and supportively behind them, in press conferences and in life.

Not Dianne Bentley, though.

According to Business Insider, when she discovered that her husband, Alabama Gov. Robert Bentley, was having an affair, she set the sabotage machine in motion that ultimately brought him down.

The governor resigned Monday as evidence mounted that he had violated a number of campaign finance and state ethics laws in pursuit of an extramarital relationship with his adviser Rebekah Mason. That the Alabama House Ethics Committee amassed so much evidence in the first place is thanks in no small part to Dianne Bentley, who saves receipts.

According to the impeachment report, the Alabaman first lady first sensed something was going on between her husband and Mason in September 2013. At the time, Mason had not yet moved to Montgomery and was living in the governor’s mansion pool house. She was also, Bentley noticed, aggressively texting the governor during off hours and for non-gubernatorial business. But Bentley didn’t get concrete proof until February 2014, when she and the governor attended a National Governor’s Association in Washington, D.C. Mason came along, and Bentley saw her texting flirtatiously with the governor at the dinner table one night.

"I can’t take my eyes off of you,” the governor texted Mason, in full view of his wife, according to the report.

In spring of 2014, the governor made a few unambiguous fumbles that blew his cover. Once, he texted his wife to say, “I love you Rebekah.” He also gave her his state-issued iPad, apparently oblivious to the fact that it was synced with his state-issued iPhone and that any texts he might send from that phone would be accessible on the iPad.

Dianne Bentley watched her husband call Mason “sweetheart” and overheard the pair discussing the governor’s “Private Rebekah phone” and speak of making an escape together. Mason apparently called the governor a “handsome wonderful amazing funny sweet man,” to which he responded, “You are wonderful my sweet love.”

Bentley’s wife took screenshots of it all, which can be viewed here.

She also obtained audio evidence. In March 2014, according to the report, she turned on her phone’s recorder, dropped it into her handbag and told her husband she was taking a “long walk on the beach.” She left her purse behind, and within one minute, the governor and Mason were chatting on the phone. Their conversation eventually took a turn from business to Mason’s breasts.

Dianne Bentley filed for divorce in 2015 and handed over her evidence to the ethics committee in 2016. Taken together with accounts from staffers on both sides, who attested to threats and the misuse of state money in an effort to sustain the affair but keep it secret, it paints a very clear picture. The governor pleaded guilty to two misdemeanor charges on Monday, and will never again run for or occupy public office.

And that’s why you always save receipts.“

  • job interviewer: what is one of your strengths?
  • me: i can turn my sadness into a relatable post for validation on tumblr dot com
  • interviewer: and one weakness?
  • me: i spend all of my time looking for validation on tumblr dot com

beware of the smiles especially. they will put you in a trance and before you know it, you’ll have an immense urge to take your clothes off.

4

1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7 / 8 / 9


Lena Luthor wasn’t usually a nervous person.  She could command an audience, she could dominate the boardroom, but right now?  She was panicking.

Honestly, Lena never really thought her friendship with Kara would reach a stage where she was slowly being introduced into the group, one by one.  Maggie had been first.  She and Lena had long since discussed the whole Maggie-arresting-Lena debacle, Maggie spending the better part of ten minutes apologising before Lena could get a word in edgewise.  She and Maggie had hit it off fairly quickly, bonding over their mutual love of Italian cuisine and various scientific magazines.

Keep reading

TEXT MEMES (SOME NSFW).

  • [text]: did you enjoy the pics? ;)
  • [text]: send me pictures
  • [text]: where are you? why aren’t you back yet?
  • [text]: I SWEAR TO GOD I’M GOING TO FUCKING KILL YOU
  • [text]: i dont know if this is what i want anymore
  • [wrong number text]: (muse name) has gone out for the night, i’m all alone ;)
  • [wrong number text]: i just don’t know if i love them anymore
  • [wrong number text]: can we forget about last night? don’t tell (muse name) please!
  • [wrong number text]: i fucked her/him aha ;-) told (muse name) it was just a drunk kiss tho
  • [text]: i love you so fucking much
  • [text]: i hate you
  • [drunk text]: UR SUCH A BITCH I H9 U 
  • [text]: i cannot stop thinking about you
  • [text]: i need you. now.
  • [text]: please respond. im so worried about you
  • [text]: last night was so GOOD
  • [text]: what are you wearing? ;)
  • [text]: is he bigger than me?
  • [text]: did you sleep with her ?!
  • [text]: you’re just a slut
  • [drunk text]: yOU’RE SO BEAUTIFUL !!>!
  • [drunk text]: dont tell (muse name) but theY ARE so hot
  • [drunk text]: im iss youu
  • [text]: bed or floor? ;-)
  • [text]: not to be desperate or anything but im currently home alone and on the verge of jerking myself off to pictures of you. would be better if it was the real you though !
  • [text]: i want you naked.
  • [text]: are you going to the party on saturday?
  • [text]: i want to show you how much i love you
  • [text]: do you hate me?
  • [text]: i’m so sorry
  • [text]: WAS THAT A SEXT
  • [text]: family dinner tomorrow night, and i’m prolly gonna finger you under the table..
  • [text]: I just bought new underwear for the sole purpose of you taking it off
  • [text]: netflix and chill? 
  • [drunk text]: lveae me alone for 29 minutes !!! jeezss
  • [text]: damn you looked so good today. kinda wanted to bend you over that table you were leaning on lol 
  • [text]: where are you i have something you need to fix (its a boner)
  • [text]: wtf is the notebook even about?? “if you’re a bird then i’m a bird” ? they’re both humans
  • Dazai: Honey, I'm home~
  • Dazai: Oh I forgot I left Chuuya behind in the Port Mafia.

Does it bother anyone else that Spencer wore these glasses in “The First Secret” and then never wore them again?

I mean yeah she probably got contacts, or maybe they’re just reading glasses as she takes them off, when she’s done texting on that phone of hers but seriously. In seven seasons, not when she was scouring the diaries in season 4 or when she let herself go in season 3.

And now there’s all these glasses clues….

I don’t know, just thought I’d bring it up.

Taako asks Kravitz to send him a nude photo and Krav goes “how nude?” and Taako goes “take it all off baby ;)” and Kravitz just texts him a picture of his skeleton chilling at his desk

anonymous asked:

Hi! Can you show me why Shoma's jumps are pre-rotated? I always see people saying his jumps are pre-rotated, but I can't really tell 'cause I'm a newbie fan. Can you put it beside Yuzu' s jump for comparison or any other skaters who has a perfect jump technique

This is Yuzuru’s triple flip take off:

he points his right toe (since he is extra, he points it inwards, going against rotation and actually rotating his triple flip more than necessary. The love for counter-rotated things is strong in him) and he does leave ice immediately. You can clearly see how the blade is fully off ice well before he hits 90° on first rotation. (Gif credits to (x))


This is Shoma’s truple (thanks Uncle Kurt for the definition!) flip:

he points his right toe at 90° degree already and he does rotate at least an additional 90° on his toe (or on his edge, since he doesn’t use only his toe in pointing…) before leaving the ice (I’d say it’s way more than 90°, but let’s be generous). You can clearly see how he takes off forward.

A text-book image of what a cheated jump is.


If you want to see other comparisons with other skaters, a youtuber put up these videos: (x), (x).

GOE debate aside, they are quite useful to see the difference.

“Once More” Dean x Reader

Words: 2,058 (I may have gotten a little carried away)

Dean x Reader

Summary: Reader is Castiel’s daughter and is sneaking around with Dean.

Warnings:SMUT!!, daddy kink

Originally posted by winsmut


Being Jimmy’s oldest daughter wasn’t easy. I had to accept at a young age that I would never see my father again, but in his place was this… Being. Castiel. At first he scared me, and I refused to be around him. “You’re not my dad…” I remember telling him the first time I met him. But as I continued to get older, I started to value him more, and I consider him to be my father now.

Today, I’m in college, still living with Jody. Even though Alex and Claire might not appreciate her, I do. After my little sister and I were left with no one, she was nice enough to let the two of us stay with her. Even now, when she’s technically not responsible for me anymore since I’m almost twenty-two, she lets me stay here instead of forcing me to live in a dorm. I will be eternally grateful, and Claire’s actions just pissed me off sometimes.

“Y/N, dinner time! And while you’re up there, tell Claire to get out of her room and join us!” Jody yelled from the kitchen downstairs. I picked my head up from my lore book, marking my place and setting it down gently on my bed. The one, and probably only, thing that my sister and I did have in common was our eagerness to hunt. Even then, that’s a long shot. She’s irresponsible, and half the time she’s wrong. I’m surprised she’s not in jail yet, even with Jody being the sheriff.

I close my door on my way out of my room, and pop my head into Claire’s room.

“Time to eat.” I tell her, watching her writing in a notebook.

“I’m busy.”

“And I don’t care. Come downstairs.” I roll my eyes. She huffs and rolls her eyes, but ultimately gets up and following me to the kitchen. God, her food smells so good.

“Where’s Alex?” I ask.

“Out with friends, I guess. She was vague on details.” Jodi tells me, setting my plate on lasagna on the table.

“She’s probably out having sex with that new boyfriend of hers.” Claire snickered.

“Her boyfriend’s an asshole, I don’t know why she’s with him.” I respond.

“Oh, you’re one to talk. You’re the one who screws-“ She started, but cut herself off when she realized she was going too far. A look of panic crosses my face, and Jody looks at me quizzically. Thankfully, she doesn’t push it any further.

“Hey, Y/N, I was going to tell you earlier but I forgot. Dean called me earlier, said they need extra help on a hunting trip.  Asked if you wanted to go along.”

“What? Of course I want to!” I practically yelled.

“I figured. They’ll be here tomorrow morning. After dinner, go pack.”  

“That’s so not fair!” Claire whined. “They never invite me to go hunting with them.”

“I’m older than you, and quite frankly, a better hunter. So, quit.” I say, trying to stop the conversation before it happened. She has no filter.

I finish my dinner quickly, and excuse myself to my room to pack, only thinking about Dean. There had always been chemistry between the two of us, but he didn’t ever act on it until about a year ago. There was a case in the next town over, so Sam and Dean stayed at our house. One night, we were drinking a little, one thing led to another and we slept together.

We both felt extremely guilty about it. Not only was I only 20 years old, meaning he’s almost double my age, but because I’m his best friend’s daughter. Castiel cared about me and treated me like a daughter to the best of his ability, and if he found out that Dean had just screwed his daughter silly… I didn’t even want to think about it.

For a while, we avoided each other. When we did see each other after that, we never talked about that night. It was strictly business, or him asking how I have been. But I could see the way he looked at me. I could feel his staring at me when he doesn’t think I notice. I see the way he always seems to want to tell me something, but never does.

Claire noticed, too. “What’s going on between you and Dean? He’s looks at you like a man looks at his fiancé on their wedding day.” She finally asked one day, as we were sitting in her room together watching TV.

I made the mistake of hesitating to answer. She threatened to tell Jody, or worse, Castiel, if I didn’t tell her what happened. She promised not to tell anybody, but oh man, did she hold that over my head anytime she wanted something.

The second time we did it, it was in his impala. Castiel had called me, asking if I could accompany him in a hunt. I obliged, thinking it would only be us two. I showed up and got the surprise of my life when I saw the boys there, too. I don’t remember exactly how we ended up together in the car, but there had been so much sexual tension between us, going unspoken. We just started ripping each other’s clothes off, and had some really great sex in the backseat.

Originally posted by sensualkisses

Ever since then, Dean and I had been finding every excuse to be together. The hard part was keeping it a secret and making sure no one was suspicious.

I finish packing, excited to see him tomorrow. I shouldn’t be this excited. He doesn’t want a relationship, I know that. I know it’s strictly sex. But a part of me wants more. I want to be able to call Dean my boyfriend, to able to not sneak around with him. I want to be able to tell him how much I love him, to feel happy with him. To have that “apple pie life.” But I know he couldn’t give me that even if he wanted to. His life was too fucked up for that. He was too fucked up for that.

I sigh, climbing into bed, and try to shut out my feelings.

-

“Rise and shine, Y/N.” I hear a man’s voicing saying from the doorway, a voice I immediately recognize. I groan, pulling the covers over my face.

“God, Dean, what time is it?” I croak out.

“Early. We gotta get out of here now if we want to be there by tonight.” He says, pulling the covers off my bed. I glare at him, looking at the clock on my nightstand.

“It’s four a.m. I want sleep.”

“Sleep in the car. You already know its comfortable back there.” He smirks, making me throw a pillow at him.

“I’ll be there in five minutes.”

I hurriedly get myself somewhat presentable, brushing my hair and teeth, and changing into regular clothes before grabbing my backpack and walking out the door. I walk past Claire’s room on the way, stopping and hugging her before I leave. I do this every time I leave for a hunt. I never know what could happen, and regardless of how annoyed she gets me, I love her.

I get to the impala, and notice that Sam isn’t there. I look at Dean, confused, but get into the passenger side of the car.

“Where’s Sam?”

“He’s meeting us there.” Dean replies, pulling out of the driveway and taking off. I felt my phone buzz, and see a text from Claire.

‘Should I start sucking Sam’s dick so I can get invited on hunts, too?’

I ignore the text, shutting it off and putting it in my bag. I don’t get to see Dean often- I’m not letting her ruin it.

The road trip was quiet and uneventful. I slept almost the entire time, and when I wasn’t sleeping, I was reading, which made Dean laugh.

“Maybe you should be with Sammy instead, you nerd.” He would joke. Every few minutes, he would look over at me and smile, not thinking that I could see him.

Before I knew it, it was already almost ten at night and we still had another three hours left of driving. I thought that Dean would just keep driving it, seeing that it was only three hours and he did this for a living, but after a few minutes he pulls into some sketchy looking motel.

“Motel, huh?” I tease.

“Shut up,” He laughs. He goes inside to get a room key while I start getting stuff out of the impala. I giggle slightly when I see that he still has my socks sitting in the floor board of his car. When we had sex in his car that one time, I accidentally left my socks after I left. He tried to return them to me, but I told him to keep them as a good luck charm, completely joking. But he never got rid of them.

It’s something stupid to be all giggly about.

“Room six.” Dean comes up to me, helping grab stuff. I lay down on the bed, enjoying the feeling of comfort after a long day of being cooped up in a car.

“You comfortable?” He looks at me, smiling.

“I am, but I need a shower. I’m just trying to gather the energy to get up and walk there.” I groan, not wanting to have to get up. Dean chuckled, and walked over to the bed, picking me up like I was a feather.

“You’re light.” He comments.

“You’re just strong.” I tell him, and he sets me down in front of the bathroom. “You know, I might need help taking my clothes off, too.”

“I’m happy to help.” His eyes sparkle, his face filling with lust. He leans in, slowly kissing me at first. I pick up the pace, opening the door to the bathroom and taking us both in there. Dean slams the door shut, and hurriedly takes my shirt off, not breaking the kiss. His hands roam all over my back, until finally unhooking my bra and taking my breasts into his mouth. I moan at the sensation, leaning against the wall in delight. He stops to take off his clothes, and I begin taking off my jeans and thong.

“Y/N, you’re beautiful. I don’t know how I got you.” Dean says, turning on the shower.

“I could say the same to you, daddy.”

His eyes got darker. He pulls me hungrily into him, kissing me hard and pumping two fingers in and out of my clit, making me moan. We step into the shower, both of us almost gasping at how good the warm water felt.

“What do you want, babygirl?”

“I want you to fuck me, daddy. Fuck me hard.” I beg. He enters me slowly from behind before going at it hard and fast.

“Fuck, Y/N” Dean hisses, hearing me moan like that was driving him over the edge. I knew he had a slight daddy kink, but not like this.

“Oh, yes, daddy, I’m close.” I barely get out, panting. He speeds up, his breath ragged at well.

“Y/N?” I hear a voice outside of shower. I jumped away from Dean.

“Hello?” The same voice says again.

Oh. My. God.

My face drops as I recognize the voice. I poke my head out of the shower just to make sure.

“Uh, hi, Castiel.” I say guilty, hiding my body behind the curtain. Dean stays silent.

“I heard you calling out for your dad. Are you ok?”

“I’m, uh, I’m fine. Sorry. You can leave now.” I choke out. I don’t think he knows Dean is in here.

“Are you sure? I can stay-“

“Castiel, I am in the shower. Please leave.” I rush him. He looks at me oddly, but eventually poofs out of the room.

“Shit, that was close.” I let out a breath.

“I can’t believe he actually did that, oh my GOD. That’s hilarious.” Dean is cracking up.

“You wouldn’t be laughing so hard if he had actually caught us.” I shot at him.

“Yeah, yeah, you’re right. But he didn’t, that’s all that matters.” He pulls me towards him, kissing me. 

“So, should we continue? This is our only night alone together, you know.” Dean makes a good point. 

“Definitely.” 

Originally posted by justjensenanddean