tagging it because people make me mad and i want to murder them

anonymous asked:

Jindosh in modern Academia for a prompt?

first of all, he’d be such a MEME

Rate Your Professor, student reviews:

>For everyone curious - yes, the thumb-vape is REAL

>Can’t wait for the day when T-800 comes from the future to stop Jindosh from inventing Skynet

>If Nikola Tesla and Walugi had a baby, and this baby was raised in a vapor store

>I never knew how great the capacity for hate was in my heart before I met him. I am a very peaceful person, but I could strangle him with his own ugly neck-tie.


>If you thought Severus Snape treated his students badly, get a load of this guy

>My biggest nightmare is that at the greatest moment of my life Jindosh appears and says “Mediocre”.

>One guy was texting during the class and Jindosh jumped from the lector podium, ran up to him, grabbed his phone and threw it out of the window

>The Genius. The Myth. The Dickbag.

>One time he brought something that looked like a box with a periscope on top of it to the class and turned it to us. It pointed laser lines at the foreheads of everyone in the audience and kept tracking people even if they tried to move. Jindosh calmly looked at his clock and said “Hm, 3,5 seconds for a target lock-on.  Needs improvement.”

>There’s a tradition of buying “I Survived Kirin Jindosh’s Murder Course” t-shirts at the end of the year.

> Daddy Long Legs

>One time I saw him drinking coffee from a fancy porcelain cup, then casually chug down 2 red bulls in less than a minute and get back to sipping coffee like nothing happened

>I got a job at Google after I showed them a page from my lab project where Jindosh wrote “Interesting”.

>When I see movies with mad scientists after taking this class: “Pfff, amateurs!”

>He gave us test papers today. We should have been alarmed that it looked like a normal test instead of his usual fucking puzzles, but we were just happy. “He was too busy building death rays in his basement!” we thought. The fools! We started working on a test and after like 20 minutes noticed that our first answers vanished. The paper was dissolving the ink! Jindosh smiled and said that this test will make up one third of our final grade. And then he sat there, smirking and vaping from his goddamn thumb, and watched us panic and try to find something that won’t disappear on these fucking papers.  

>Good luck with your grades if Jindosh doesn’t find you interesting, and God help you if he does.

>This is the asshole that you’re going to hate and curse more than all of the other teachers combined, but then one day he says “Impressive. There might be some potential in you after all” and it’s the proudest you’ve ever felt.

Shit Kirin Jindosh Says, a collaborative documentary account:

“Since you’ve turned in your first homework at the last week’s class, it’s time to address the grades. Everyone gets an “F”.  I didn’t actually read your homework, of course, because I have infinitely more interesting and important things to do than reading your feeble attempts to grasp the obvious. In fact, I could achieve more advancement of the modern technology in a time that this lecture takes than all of you combined will manage in your entire lives. But if anyone thinks that their work deserves my attention, tell me and I will read it right now, and then share everything I think about your papers and you in particular.”

“I took points from the score of your project, Williams, because it’s ugly. Yes, it’s functional, and yes, there’s even an idea that is not completely banal, but it’s put together sloppily. You didn’t perfect the design until the elegance and simplicity of forms could emerge. If you’re not interested in doing this because you want to save your precious time for drinking and orgies, then I suggest you transfer to Sokolov’s class.”

“Today’s lab work is a group project. You will form pairs and each complete one half of the presented tasks. For the next class each of you will also write a program that can complete the same tasks as your partner did. The final goal is to successfully replace the human counterpart.”

“You make me test and challenge myself every day, Parker. I’m used to my genius mind knowing no boundaries, no limits of imagination, yet in the multitude of all possible universes I struggle to imagine a single one where you said anything worthwhile.”

“I have few comments to make regarding a so-called “Jindosh-bot” that roamed the premises yesterday. The integration of a smoke machine for hand-pipe is moderately clever, and the moustache wind-mill was not devoid of originality.  But the movement dynamics are horribly outdated! What did you use as a prototype, an epileptic cow? This is inexcusable as you have an access to the documentation of the Clockwork’s early builds. Overall, B- for the effort.”

SKJS is proud to present our first Kirin Jindosh dub-step remix. Mind your sensitivities, people!

Attached file: “Scintillating_industry.mp3”

“But Radcliffe is SUPPOSED to be racist because he’s the BAD GUY...”

aka when everybody who gets mad about my Pocahontas tag wants to completely forget the worst characters in the film:

That’s what we’re going to talk about today, friends. If you’ve been following me for awhile now, you already know my feelings about this film. However, this is something that I don’t think gets nearly enough attention. I’ll add a cut because this is going to be a long one:

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A House Divided- Avengers x Reader(f)

Authors notes: I don’t really know where this came from but here it is haha

Notes/Warnings: Major character deaths (but not really), guns (but not really) violence (okay, yeah its a little tense)

Originally posted by there-and-always-back-again

Captain America paced in the small conference room, pinching the bridge of his nose. “This is going to tear us apart.” He sighed.

 “Maybe,” Natasha said plainly. “But it has to be done.” She pulled back the hammer on her gun and held it in front of her as she headed out of the glass doors cautiously. “They chose their sides and they knew what it meant.”

 Cap picked up his weapon and huffed. He pressed a hand to his ear to use the coms to speak to the rest of the team. “Alright, everyone, keep your eyes out and watch your six.”

 “Cap,” Sam replied from under a desk in Tony’s lab. “I’ve got movement up stairs near the bar. I think someone is in the vents.”

 “That’s gotta be Clint.” Natasha chimed in as she ran towards the common room. “I’ll take him out.”

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You know what makes me really fucking mad? On the last post I just reblogged, the “antis” have decided to post their fucking comments on it. Like no. We don’t want your damn opinions. Like they must have no life if all they do is go on the ddlg tag and hate on everything they see. And go attacking innocent people, and tearing them down to the point where their self esteem has vanished, and it’s gotten to a point where people actually want to just… disappear because that’s how bad the hate can be from them.

The antis need to get the fuck out of the ddlg tag and focus on their own lives, because most of us are innocent. Have we ruined their life? No. Have we murdered their family? No. Have we shot their damn cat? No. So really they don’t have ANY reason to come after us.

And no, ddlg is NOT about sexualizing children. BECAUSE DDLG IS TWO CONSENTING ADULTS.

The only time I’ll talk about a theory:


So I clearly lied because here I am with another theory post. This time I’ve decided to elaborate on my previous idea (you can find it here) so that it’s easier to understand. With the release of the ‘Spring Day’ trailer I’ve realized that it could be all backwards, but at the same time it could also be in the right order. However, I’ll explain the latter in a different post. 

(Tagging a few people who this may interest, @kittae, @dimplecoups, @thules, @dailydoseofdia)

To begin with my initial idea, if the entire series were backwards here is what the music videos would mean and represent: 

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So, someone has accused me of supporting domestic abuse because I sometimes reblog JxH fanart/gifs/etc. So I want to clarify exactly how I personally treat JxH and why accusing perfect strangers of being abuse apologists based on this kind of stuff is baseless and really uncool.

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anonymous asked:

Is t ok for me to ask when she says those those things? I'm not saying it ain't true I've just listen to very little of her music (the weird "big/cry baby X daddy" vibe makes me uncomfortable)

ofcccc yes!!!!

(tw for ableism, slurs, appropriation of mental illness, mention of rape/sexual assault/csa/pedophilia, misogyny, slut shaming, mention of food, death/murder, abuse, mention of suicide under cut)

(sorry @ mobile users)

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Top 5 Final Fantasy Antagonists

It’s not like I have 3 fics to finish 2 of them with deadlines, nor like I am facing a mayhem of time chaos, or that I have the basic human need to sleep, nope. Let’s just find something else to spend time on. So here we are.

Because this will feature spoilers related to FFXV under a cut at the end, I have to do this now. Tags! Please, I tag everyone that wants to do this, and all I ask is that you mention me in the post @hannibalcatharsis-zero because I want to read people’s opinions, thoughts, biases, whatever, on your top favorite FF antagonists. You don’t have to make it as lengthy as I did, but I do talk a lot.
If I may, I’d like to directly tag @lvl99fangirl @adrastia @fujoshilyfe @datamarluxia @haeng-syo-peace@dancing-aqua@allowthisfam​ if you want to, simply because I’ve exchanged some words with you before.

Enough endless intro, on to the huge post.

Runner ups:

- Rufus Shinra (Compilation FFVII)

A rare case in FF, he’s neither an experiment, hybrid of some sort, madman or blessed/cursed with some awesome powers. 

This guy is entirely and purely human and therefore is all the more cold heartedness, lust for power, intellect and cunning. Seeing him the first time in Advent Children was one thing, but going back and seeing the stuff he did in FFVII? Even before that? Man, Papa Shinra wasn’t a nice man at all, but apples don’t fall far from the tree and the prodigal son sure as hell did some bad stuff and planned worse. And tried to kill dad more often than his other two brothers did just to rule in his stead even more ruthlessly than the old man. 

Good thing it just took a damn WEAPON firing, explosion and near death experience, Meteor falling and Geostigma to make him consider atoning.

I actually want to see him on the FFVII remake more than anything else really. Full HD Rufus on the prime of his full power-mad and evil persona? Damn.

- Kadaj, Yazoo & Loz (Compilation FFVII) - specially Kadaj

Originally posted by petite-princee

Originally posted by shinysnivy

I love Sephiroth’s Remnants, particularly Kadaj. They’re all so childish (including Yazoo!), which I find rather interesting when you know they’re parts of Sephiroth. Shoutaro Morikubo’s voice acting was beautiful and really built Kadaj’s threatening and deadly persona, while having the feeling of mean but lost child you kinda want to hug. Or would want to, if he wouldn’t likely kidnap your children, torture and kill you.

- Snow Villiers (Lightning Returns Final Fantasy XIII)

Yes, I know he’s not a real antagonist (not for long anyway), but look at him. He needs to be mentioned just because look at him.  

Holy shit.

–My top 5 favorite antagonists–

(not in order of preference!)

- Sephiroth (Compilation FFVII)

Originally posted by xsephiroth

Sephiroth is the name even non-FF fans know of. You have to give to a character when they create such a huge impact overall.

He is visually striking. When he did get voice acting, his voice is memorable (the Japanese one more, but the English isn’t bad either). His theme is memorable. He commited one of the most unexpected and memorable main-character murders in games specially as of 1997, and for that reason remained engarved in gaming history. He overall has all the immediate aspects to make him memorable.

The fallen hero that became a villain instead when he loses his mind after finding about (and missinterpretating) his origins as a genetical experiment. Personally, seeing his downfall in Crisis Core made me all the more fascinated with him. I grew to like him a lot more after seeing that, the change that happened to him. How awesome was Sephiroth, seriously? He was kind. Funny even. Man, Hojo is one of the most truly evil characters in the wholeout FF franchise.

The only one with shitty father (the worst) who DIDN’T kill him! Man, seriously, Rufus tried, Genesis did, so did Seymour. Seriously Sephiroth, why didn’t you kill Hojo.

Crisis Core is excellent overall. One of the saddest games.

I honestly don’t know how to exactly pinpoint what makes me like Sephiroth so much.

But the music helped too.
EVERYONE that knew me in 2006-2010 knew this song. I made sure of it.

- Genesis Rhapsodos (Crisis Core/Compilation FFVII)

Originally posted by caerberus

Genesis doesn’t really get a lot of love, and I can’t really blame long-time fans in particular. But personally, I find it a shame.
It does help, I think, that I don’t take Crisis Core in its English version. The whole FFVII universe exists in my head in its Japanese format, I’m sorry to the voice actors of the Eng sub. Gackt’s voice is Genesis’s (well, that’s the point really. He is a lot more irritating in English.

I love everything about this guy. I love the melancholia he lived in, the search for purpose/understanding through parallels, the obssession and obssessive persona he created, the search for friends of equal worth, the utter self hatred, the madness he fell into.
Genesis is tragic.

And the just little (little) stabs and just friendly twists of the knife on Sephiroth’s psyche “We’re all monsters, I’m a monster, but you’re the worst of all. You’re the defination of monster, you know? But hey, I want you to be my friend, help me out :) “

I find it a huge tragedy that he outlives so many people when he didn’t plan to.

- Seymour Guado (FFX)

Originally posted by datamarluxia

My love for this guy exceeds my argumentation ability.

The nihilist even before I knew what nihilism was. I for one never minded his English voice, which in later years I found that people had a quirk against. One of the things I appreciated was to see him fall to madness and how it reflected in his voice turning fiend-ish. I like that he’s the counterpart/parallel of Yuna and how she turned her goal into preserving life and overcoming pain while he decided to end life to end pain.
With the life he lived, you can hardly NOT understand why he sees the world like that. Ostracized for being half-Human half-Guado when obviously he had no fault on that; his father who DID have a part on that shipped him away with his mother arguably for their protection; his mother commiting second-hand suicide to help him gain public appeal against him literally crying for her not to (I wonder why he would prefer his mother alive, huh? I still love those memories in Zanarkand Ruins so much); finally being accepted because he fucking exceeds at magic and has the most powerful Dark Aeon one can have only to see the utter corruption of the world and the religious-political regime that ends up confirming and preaching what he knows from experience - life is about suffering and will ever be.

And he’s the definition of ‘doesn’t die’ (Sephiroth too). I mean, you KILL him at 30% of the game, and he literally returns more than to haunt you :) that’s 4 fucking fights, and overall most people can agree that Seymour Flux was one of the hardest storyline boss fights in the franchise. Many tears were shed under countless hours of attempts only to be crushed each time under Total Annhilation attack.

Besides, not many antagonists include in their plans literally marrying the protagonist (and beforementioned parallel)and having one of the most beautiful wedding purposals 

Originally posted by caerberus

Originally posted by caerberus

Originally posted by captestheimxv

and one of the most awesome weddings ever in gaming history,  in my opinion.

Originally posted by caerberus

Originally posted by iures

Originally posted by caerberus

Originally posted by ethernalium

Originally posted by aegisol

- Caius Ballad (FFXIII-2/Lightning Retuns)

Originally posted by cleyra

Caius saved Final Fantasy XIII trilogy for me.

The whole point of making a post on antagonists/villains is because these characters are a structural part of any story - any FF in particular. FFXIII severily lacked and failed overall to me because of this. Then came this guy and as soon as he appears in the intro, you cannot take your eyes off him.

Originally posted by finalaeon

Originally posted by liberatorofsouls

Originally posted by thingsinlifeyoujustdo

Originally posted by noellkreiss

Caius has got to be one of the most selfless antagonists in the franchise. He’s mean, yeah, but you get his point from the get go. He’s willing to end everything and everyone if it means he can save a girl that has been suffering endlessly (in his view at least - that was one beautiful twist in the story/interpretation, Noel’s words about Yeul’s reincarnation).

And you know what, another rare thing in FF antagonists: he’s successful. He got what he wanted, most of it anyway, including his death. There were some setbacks and unexpected stuff for him in LR indeed (he didn’t plan the Chaos of Yeuls binding him in the paradox, but well) but he got pretty much his biggest three wishes - kill Etro/kill himself, unleash Chaos and Valhalla to destroy time and save Yeul.
Not everything ended up exactly like he envisioned, but the result was basically the same. And he was happy.

Also. The voice. The fcking VOICE. Liam O’Brian, man.

The pain in his words!

And the music!

- Ardyn Izunia (FFXV)

Originally posted by datamarluxia

Well this part isn’t spoilers yet so:
The voice. The. fcking. voice. The range of emotions Darin de Paul and Fujiwara Keiji have in their performances is amazing. Ardyn is so unique, so regal, over the top if he wants and so often funny. So captivating. 
His whole image/pose is striking, the way he stands and moves. Will anyone deny that that entrace in the fucking BEAUTIFUL MAGESTIC throne room in Kingsglaive didn’t immediately steal all and any attention to himself despite his surroundings and King Regis standing in the throne? He owns a scene the moment he appears.

Originally posted by verryfinny

I also found his more human image (meaning his realism really - you don’t get an antagonist in FF looking this real when it comes to mid/late 30s) quite appealing when compared to others. He’s beautiful obviously, like all others, and still clearly FF-ian, but he’s less ‘facially perfect’ compared to several others before him.

-spoilers- henceforth obviously

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astralstarzero  asked:

Prompt: Naegi instead of becoming the SHSL good luck, studies law at an early age and becomes the SHSL Ace Attorney (yes, I am on a Phoenix Wright binge.)

A/N you give me some of the wildest prompts and I love them. high five! I live off AA too! I had so much fun with this, thanks!

SHSL Ace Attorney - wherein Naegi has a different talent

My name is Makoto Naegi and I’m just some ordinary high school student. I’m as plain as they come appearance-wise and my interests are about as average as can be. There’s really nothing that special about me.


Sorry, uh, force of habit. Anyway! As I was saying, if there’s anything that’s out of the ordinary for me is that I’m enrolled at Hope’s Peak Academy, the most prestigious high school in all of Japan. What’s my talent? Well I think you can infer from my title, SHSL Ace Attorney. I’m not really sure why the “ace” part is necessary since it sounds redundant with “shsl” but oh, well. It’s not like I’m the one who decides on these things.

I know what you’re thinking. How could I possibly get a degree on law at my age? Is it even possible? Well it certainly wasn’t easy. I think I spent more nights awake and studying rather than sleeping soundly. It helped that I had some gift for it but most of this was earned through hard work. I’m not even sure what got me so determined to pursue law in the first place. I blame all those attorney games I played when I was a kid.

Although I’ve already earned my degree and even passed the bar, I was still scouted for high school. In all honesty, I could have turned down the offer since I’m way past studying. But then again this was THE Hope’s Peak Academy. Entering here meant I was set for life. Not that I cared much for that incentive. It sounded like a good excuse for me to take a break and just feel some semblance to normalcy before I go all out in the real world.

And so, here I was being a not so ordinary high school student.

“Look, dude. I’m not mad. Just pissed off.” Mondo growled. “If you fess up already then we’ll call it quits and I promise not to mess up your face that much.”

“Bwaaah!” Hagakure blanched and cowered in fear. “Y-You got the wrong guy! I swear it wasn’t me!”

“He’s scary pissed off, man.” Kuwata whistled in mock sympathy. “I’d confess if I were you. You’re already a goner.”

“But it wasn’t me!” Hagakure insisted despite him trembling.

“Yeah, right. You’re the only one here desperate for cash.” Enoshima pointed out with a toothy grin, rather pleased with the entertainment. “Face it, buddy. You’re totally screwed!”

“Plus you were the culprit last time as well.” Ikusaba added insightfully.

“Let bygones be bygones!” Hagakure declared, not quite ready to forfeit  his life. “And I just so happen to pick it up last time! I’m innocent I swear!”

“Looks like the people have spoken.” Mondo cracked his knuckles threateningly. “Pray you got insurance because what I’m about to do ain’t pretty.”

Hagakure yelped and raised his hands in defense.


It’s at this point that I decided to intervene. “We don’t know for sure if it was Hagakure who did it. We can’t jump to conclusions just yet.”

“Ah, I was wondering when you’d speak up.” Celes commented, amused with a polite smile plastered on her face. “I assume you’d like to hold a class trial then.”

“Yes, it’s within Hagakure’s right to go through proper procedures.” I seconded with a nod.

“As usual, your honor is something to be strived for.” Sakura commented approvingly.

“But isn’t a trial too much for something this small?” Fujisaki raised his concern.

“Nothing is too small in the eyes of the court.” I firmly declared as I then loudly slammed my palms against my desk. “Your honor, I request that we hold a class trial immediately!”

“Request granted!” Ishimaru yelled and saluted. “Justice is very much welcomed in the school environment.”

“That was surprisingly quick.” Maizono remarked at how smoothly the events unfolded.

“Nothing can hold back against Naegi-dono when his sense of justice switch is flipped!” Yamada dramatically shouted. “He moves the plot forward like a protagonist!”

“Naegichi! Thanks so much for saving my back!” Hagakure cheered and slapped my back.

“Don’t celebrate so soon, Hagakure. We aren’t in the clear yet.” I warned him. “We have yet to prove your innocence.”

“But you will, right?” He asked.

“I’m a defense lawyer. It’s what I do.” I smiled at him and then turned to the rest of the class.


And such were my days as a high school student who just so happened to be a lawyer as well.


Turnabout Class Trial

This was the final clash of hope against despair.

“It’s no use! Nothing makes sense anymore! We can’t solve this case!” Hagakure wailed in tears and pulled at his hair.

“Objection!” I shouted at him and then calmly explained, “Once you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains must be the truth… no matter how improbable it may seem.”

“So does that mean that you truly believe that we are all innocent? Preposterous! Someone had to have committed murder for there to be a corpse.” Togami pointed out with a sneer.

“We never really know when someone is guilty or innocent. All we can do is believe in them.” I shot back, not backing down from this argument that could cost us our lives. “And in our case, I’m going to believe in us. In all of us.”

“But if it’s not one of us then… who? And what does that mean? I’m scared… I’m scared of what we’ll find out. I don’t think I’m ready to know.” Asahina quietly murmured.

“Our job is to find the truth, no matter how painful it may be.” I lowered my voice. “Just like how every time I point my finger someone always ends up getting hurt, finding the truth is inevitable. It’s what we must do in order to move forward.”

“L-Look at yourself all calm and composed! Y-You’re all b-brave now but I see through your f-facade! You always c-cry after the trial! Ha! H-How can we put our hope in s-someone like y-you?” Fukawa accused him with a trembling finger.

“It’s true. I do cry. I cry a lot. I always cry after an execution.” I admitted with a pained face. “As much as I want to cry right now, I can’t.” I continued with a somber smile. “That’s because the only time a lawyer can cry… is when it’s all over.”

“While it’s true that you can’t afford to shed tears, what intrigues me more is your attitude. How can you smile at a time like this?” Kirigiri asked in honest curiosity.

I simply wore my best smile yet.

“The worst of times are when lawyers force their biggest smiles.”

And this was just the beginning of the turnabout trial of hope versus despair.

Little Bit Of Truth

Originally posted by kyunqdae

» jongdae x reader
» 3.8k
» Luhan kisses me and Chen doesn’t understand why he feels jealous… [pm]

“Dae, are you okay?” Minseok asks from across the table.

“Fine,” is all that Jongdae says, shifting in his seat when he realises his hyung is observing him. He waits for a moment and then finally talks, sighing as he does so, “what’s so appealing about Luhan that there isn’t about me?”

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“I must admit, I’m impressed. You and your boys needed just five attempts to catch me. You did a better job than the Fire Nation Army. But what for?”

“You’re accused of theft, destruction of private and public property, assault, attempted murder and murder. The list is long enough.”

“Woah, stop there! I admit, I stole at least once some food and about the property- it was in my way when I got attacked. By you! And I didn’t want to harm any of you, at least not badly. But murder? I didn’t even try to murder anyone! Not seriously though.”

“Say whatever you want in court.”

“Ha ha. As if I get a fair trial here.”

“Shut up, rebel scum.”

“Rebel, no scum. And by the way, I don’t believe you’re supporting that scum on your throne. Call me delusional, but my gut says you’re actually not all bad. You could have treated me worse - get me beaten up, otherwise humiliated. Don’t look so offended, I’ve seen enough. And you care about your soldiers and civilians, hey, even for me, at least to be treated fair.”

“I don’t care for your oppinion. What’s your point?”

“Ok, so I’ll dare. Let me ask you a question, Captain. Where do your loyalties lie? With your kingdom or with that harpy on your throne, who murdered your queen? You know: We don’t have to be enemies, because we might have the same goal: save the Earth Kingdom.”

Rexsoka Week / Day 6: It’s Madness! (AU)

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about Karkat Vantas

it seems to be that time of year again where the “Karkat is canonically abusive I don’t make the rules” posts start up (yet another homestuck wank you could set your watch by) so I wrote a lot of words about why this is in canon demonstrated not to be true.

let’s begin! this post is mainly about the idea that karkat is prone to anger fits, yells a lot, and attacks other people.

so to start, literally all of karkat’s friends, every single one of the trolls, sees his “anger fits and yelling a lot” as amusing and harmless, and (correctly) perceive it as a defense mechanism to cover up how much he cares about you. karkat may have been angry and yelling a lot at the kids early on in his trolling the humans, but we literally witness him grow out of it. we literally see him stop throughout act 5.2. once again, in act 5.1, we already saw ALL of the following trolls treat his “anger fits” like cute diversions because they knew he was just fronting:

  • nepeta, who takes no offense to his rolling-eyes level “attempt” at roleplaying
  • sollux, whom he ends his first conversation with with “are we still cool, are you mad at me, did I take this too far”
  • feferi, who tells jade karkat is “pretty harmless”
  • tavros
  • kanaya
  • terezi, who is on record as finding it cute
  • aradia
  • gamzee
  • vriska, who tries to encourage the angry shit because she likes the attention, but outright tells john that karkat is too nice and is “bad” at being a troll
  • equius
  • even fucking eridan

we only see karkat and tavros interact with the “stop playing games for girls” gag (which I don’t feel you can take as an indication of karkat’s character, since it’s a callback meme) and the memo where tavros asks for advice w/r/t vriska, which is pretty tame (tavros doesn’t seem insulted at all by karkat saying “why do you assholes keep bothering me with romantic problems”). we also barely see karkat and equius interact at all outside of the log where karkat asks him to deal with gamzee. but notably, both of them have interactions in alterniabound which are fairly nice, and neither acts like karkat is a naturally angry person. it’s notable that at this point aradia is an emotionless dead robot and she still sees karkat’s shit as a front. people tend to bring up how “mean” he was in his first conversation with gamzee all the time, and yet, gamzee doesn’t care. gamzee finds it endearing. gamzee acts like this is just a cute quirk of how karkat is. karkat is outright mean to eridan at one point late in 5.2, on account of eridan just having fucking murdered kanaya and feferi and having attempted to murder sollux. and yet, eridan still thinks it’s just karkat being karkat. in fact, other people commenting on karkat telling eridan off, namely feferi, also think it’s just karkat shouting as a front for something and that this is how karkat plays jokes. 

and again, even his actual anger toward the humans in late act 4 and early 5.2 is something we fucking watch him grow out of to the point of being actually embarrassed by. penis ouija is also something people like to give as proof of how “abusive” karkat is but the dude had just spent something like 20 minutes literally shouting at himself from both sides of a conversation. if there’s anyone karkat is abusive to, it’s himself. it’s one moment in time on a long 3 year journey, and in the retcon timeline, it’s replaced by, quoth rose, him and dave drawing dicks in her book while giggling furiously.

besides that, his original actions in penis ouija aren’t endorsed, but even then they’re treated like absurd desperation, not as abuse. since this time the wank is about dave: dave’s reaction to him is not “this shit is triggering me,” which, if karkat was actually being vicious, might be understandable. his reaction isn’t even “I want out of this situation because I’m uncomfortable with karkat yelling.” his reaction is “look at this fucking tool, get him out of my face.” and despite that moment where neither of them technically likes each other, they still go on to become friends by year 2, and actual bffs by year 3 of the retconned version of the meteor journey. and that’s in the version of the timeline that got erased. in the new version of the timeline, they’re already best friends (and possibly even already together) by that point on year 1. 

for real, I can’t get past this: we literally watch him grow to the point that he is embarrassed by how mean he was to the humans. that happens onscreen. by the end of 5.2 he is being downright cordial to both jade and to john, who are the only ones he really speaks to in act 5 outside of that one memo with dave in it. and even if you want to talk about penis ouija, we see him disown how he was behaving then, too, in a conversation with terezi in openbound. he’s embarrassed by it. he knows it wasn’t cool. we see him grow out of that behavior, too. we even see him grow out of blaming “past me” for everything as though he’s a separate individual, and start to own up to his own behavior as mistakes he made. 

karkat vantas is not presented in canon as an abusive individual. I want to stress that if his behavior bothers or triggers you, that’s fine and of course nobody should tell you not to be bothered. but if you’re making posts about how the rest of fandom isn’t reading him right because they don’t see him as abusive, or that you know how icky davekatters just want karkat to be happy or don’t care about dave (and boy could I write a whole separate post about that behavior), you’re being an asshole. especially if you shove it in ship tags and then expect people not to reply to you, or to disagree. 

OK, I have to make a little pointer here because I’ve seen stuff in the Kurapika tag as well as some others that is making me really annoyed with this new chapter release.

Some people are mad that Togashi killed Shalnark and Kortopi and that Hisoka is going on a rampage to ‘kill all the Spiders’ now. Some people are even telling him to go back on hiatus or rewrite it all. This is his story, remember, and he can do what he wants. Yes, I know it’s sad when characters you adore die, I’ve experienced this before and I am now, but you don’t need to throw hissy fits to Togashi either. Authors and creators of work do what they want with a story but negative backlash will just make creators want to stop and make a negative fanbase.

He had also mentioned before that the Phantom Troupe was going to die. After all, he killed the Chimera Ants. Togashi kills off his villains in the manner he deems timely and fit. Plus, there was foreshadowing of death for Troupe members during the death fight between Hisoka and Chrollo when Chrollo possessed Nen of his own fellow Spiders. The fortunes Chrollo even wrote during Yorkshin / Yorknew were evidence enough that hey, characters are going to die. A lot of characters didn’t even read theirs out loud and it may of mentioned death at a later point. 

We all also know Hisoka is a sore loser. He doesn’t like losing, especially when he has things he wants to do. And why did he go after Kortopi and Shalnark first? Why not Machi? Why did Togashi put them there? They were Nenless and likely not going to regain their Nen. Machi had hers and was left there, and since Hisoka payed her for a treatment but then denied it, he might of also had this planned from even before the battle to rid of the Troupe and make Machi his messenger. Shalnark and Kortopi, in his mind, are now ‘ broken toys ‘ without their Nen. If he cannot fight them, then what is the use of them being alive? Plus, it sets an example, a warning to the other Spiders. He does have a temper, but he is also smart and cunning, and we cannot deny him of that as he’s shown many examples in the past of this.

Now I want to move onto something that’s been severely ticking me off– demonizing Kurapika. People are getting pissed at him for killing the Troupe, and I have seen some accounts and I haven’t been able to return to the tag since the spoiler release Wednesday. How is he a bad person for killing the Troupe when they’re the mass murderers? He doesn’t even want to kill. In past, when he did fight Uvogin, he mentioned how he hated the feeling and emotions that arose from the fight, and he gave him option after option for forgiveness. He didn’t want to kill. In the Trick Tower, he says how he doesn’t condone violence and doesn’t want to kill unless forced to.

Uvogin accepted death and refused to apologize. Pakunodona didn’t have to use her Nen, and Kurapika went the pacifist route after killing Uvogin with his chains being used instead of murdering. Paku chose death to inform her fellow Spiders of who Kurapika was. He didn’t want to kill, but she chose it. 

He also made a promise to Gon about no longer continuing to go after the Spiders, but his Clan’s eyes. He’s kept this promise since after Yorknew, not once trying to go after the Phantom Troupe. Maybe he’s thought about it, but not once has he broken that vow. Kurapika doesn’t like violence, he hates the death, and it’s even shown in the 99 anime how badly it affects him- he vomits after killing Uvogin, when he’s back and gets a fever from his illness over his guilt. Hell, he even sees mirages of them with the guilt and remorse he feels over taking two people’s lives, even if they were mass murderers and thieves who cared for no one besides their small click of thieves.

Yes, you can mourn over your favorite character’s deaths. Yes, I understand, even if they’re a villain, you can like them. If they die though, that doesn’t mean you can take it out like this and make a fanbase look bad, or make others so annoyed and irritated to the point of wanting to leave. If you really do not like the decision an author or creator makes to the point you’re make these threats to an author or severely misinterpret a character to where others cannot go do what they like without being bothered or upset, take a break. Take a breather, step away. If that’s not enough and you want to leave, then leave. 

This is what makes a severely unhealthy fandom, something that makes people hate the group of people they used to cherish a similar love for now despise it. Please, Hunter X Hunter is a great fandom, and don’t ruin it over this.

If you guys can collectively hate Nero in the tag, then I can put one rant in it, fuck it.

I’m not usually one to start shit. I do think fandom/ship wars are dumb and I try my best to avoid participating in them. But hey, it’s you guys who came out of the woodwork with this, so you reap what you sow.

To everyone hating on Nero: please make a mental list of everything that has happened in this show so far and reconsider? As soon as I finished watching episode 10, I got very afraid for some reason, and now I know this is exactly what I’ve been worried about. That this fandom would get a collective fucking kneejerk about Corteo and would start hating Nero. And before you start going on about how I don’t care about Corteo’s death; actually, I do, and I’m upset about it, but that doesn’t prevent me from using my fucking brain.

This show is designed to make you think about morality,

In case you haven’t noticed yet. More specifically, it’s the usual ends-justify-the-means trope. The point of the entire thing is to push everyone’s limits in how long can they keep supporting Angelo. They pulled all the dirty tricks; he’s the protagonist, he looks good, he even has a few ‘nice’ moments. The characters’ names also support the good/evil dichotomy between Angelo (angel) and Nero (black). Now, we don’t know the show’s stance on this, since we don’t have the ending yet, but I’m pretty damn fucking sure it’s not gonna be ‘Angelo’s just fine lol, he’s a good guy, did the right thing’. Like good, don’t consider this a conclusion, putting your common sense to exercise is exactly the goal, so go ahead and keep thinking Nero is the ‘bad’ side. Knock yourselves out. And I’m looking forward to your reaction to the last episode.

Nero’s life has been completely and disproportionately fucked over by Angelo

He lived his life in self-loathing up until now for not being able to shoot someone. At fourteen. He obviously gets way too attached to people for his own good as a mafioso. And there comes Angelo, murdering his best friend then another one of his comrades, making him kill his own brother and slowly isolating him until he can’t trust anyone else. You guys are mad about Corteo’s death, right? Guess why THAT happened? Only so Angelo could keep messing with Nero’s mind. On top of everything, Nero just became Don, one more thing he has to deal with besides everything going to shit. His father seems to be sick, and once he dies (along with his still present authority), people will start coming for Nero from all around.

And you’re gonna call him a shitty person after this. You’re just gonna ignore every motherfucking episode that has happened so far and only look at Angelo and Corteo’s one-week domestic life, as if Corteo’s death was some big fucking surprise, something completely unexpected and out of the blue, moreover, something Nero did just because he’s Evul

Also on the subject of Corteo

Look, I’m not gonna go into the realm of blaming someone for dying. But he could’ve made so many better choices. He had so many chances to quit. I still think that, among all the romantic loyalty, Corteo could’ve considered the realistic outcome of his actions. If he just left, he could’ve went to college and maybe, after Angelo got over with his revenge, he could’ve had something to live for. He was literally the only person Angelo had from his past. Instead, he decided to betray the Vanettis, have the entire city wanting him dead, walk over to FANGO, and then come back again. 

Corteo is not dumb. So, why has he been acting irrationally since episode 8? He’s jealous. I don’t even mean this in an exclusively ship-way; ever since the beginning, he’s always looked uneasy and concerned about Angelo being all buddy-buddy with Nero (first the face he makes when they meet at the brewery and he sees Angelo laugh at Nero’s joke; then later when he overhears the brother-line after Frate’s death). If he’s afraid that Angelo might feel sympathy for Nero and end up very badly, or he just doesn’t want his childhood friend to be taken from him, I can only guess. Either way, Corteo’s betrayal was an act of self-indulgent altruism (yes, that’s an actual oxymoron, make an attempt at understanding what I mean). He wanted Angelo to be happy, but happy in his own definition, by his own terms, at his own pace. 

And you all love Corteo, I get it, okay? Corteo is nice. Corteo is likeable. I also like Corteo. Everyone likes Corteo. Corteo didn’t deserve this. Corteo shouldn’t have gotten involved with the mafia. But that doesn’t mean that once he’s dead, you can claim that he has made no mistakes in his life EVER.

To the ones who ride this bandwagon to shipbash

Oh yes, I love listening to this Discourse TM. The goddamn, fucking fantasy-is-basically-reality bullshit. Because surely, shipping something is gonna hurt someone. Even better: it’s gonna hurt the characters themselves. Of course, that’s right, so reasonable, so intelligent, so mature, not entitled and egoistic at all to want the entire fandom to cater to your sensitivities, likes and dislikes. That’s right, this is so worth bashing people over. 

Yes, I’m talking about avilero, I’m gonna name it, so you can just blacklist the tag. See? Did you a favour there. You don’t have to look at it anymore, it’ll be magical. You know what I’m forced to look at, though? Your whining in the main tag, because there’s no universal tag for ‘complaining about irrelevant things’ I can block. 

In conclusion

I wouldn’t have showered you with this wall of text if only you didn’t freak out. 

I just wanted to make a point.

Today was horrible. People were held hostages and killed. Everyone, in every city in France, is scared about what could happen next.

Meanwhile, on Tumblr, I see people saying that Charlie Hebdo was a racist/sexist/homophobic/islamophobic/[insert other buzzwords here], some say that they deserved it or that we shouldn’t be surprised.

I’m so angry.

This is NOT the Tumblr I know. This is NOT the site where I was taught about race, gender et sexual orientation issues, about privileges, feminism, racism, about Ferguson and Mexico, about America, about its history and politics. This is NOT the place where I gained self-confidence, laughed, cried, learned things.

I don’t recognise anymore the community who value tolerance and multiculturalism. Most of people I see aren’t capable of critical thinking.

When Ferguson happened, a lot of people expected to find comfort on this site. They did. I reblogged Ferguson posts and I still care a lot about this issue.

But what do I see under the Charlie Hebdo tag ?

Victim blaming. Comparing this tragedy to other tragedies and minimise it like it’s a fucking contest. Clear lack of fact checking. Inability to understand the social, political and historical context in France. Misunderstanding of French political and philosophical ideas. Inability to open a fucking Wikipedia page about Charlie Hebdo and the cartoonists and journalists who were murdered. French bashing (obviously). Inability to understand another culture. And other things.

My country isn’t perfect. No country is. But it’s a democracy. And i’d like to say that hate speech IS prohibited and penalized by law. People were sentenced for hate speech against Black, Muslim, Jewish or gay people. Obviously I wish there were more people charged. Anyway, that’s another debate.

If I had to describe myself to the world with one word, I think it would be that. French. Because I’m proud. I’m proud to be French above all. For certain reasons, one of them is my education. You can say that’s it’s because I’m a white cis girl. That’s right, I am.

And today, I feel like the people of Tumblr failed me. I didn’t find the comfort I was looking for when I felt bad. I didn’t find inspiration, positivity and support. I thought it was the point of Tumblr, and I don’t want to feel like I was wrong. I came across something worst than silence. People insulting French people. Hate, insults, victim blaming and all that stuff I already said. People insulting the memory of those who died.

I don’t want to feel betrayed, I don’t want to feel disgusted by this website, I don’t want to feel angry like this. I came to the point where I’m feeling lucky about having almost nobody on my dash (except for the few French blogs I follow) reblogging posts about this. Because I prefer to see nothing than to witness the amount of crap that some French people here saw on their dashboard.

I know there are a lot of people out there who show support, and I would like to thank you with all my heart. Thank you, thank you and thank you. This means so much.

There will be marches on Sunday to honor all the victims’ memory. We will stand united.

I wanted to primarily use this to promote lesser known writers, but I’ve only been in the fandom (online) for a little over 6 months I’m not always sure who is a lesser known writer and who isn’t. I think sometimes it depends on the pack they run in so, I’ve just chosen some of the fics I’ve really enjoyed lately that aren’t from the really big BNFs.

(I also started on all of this before Fresh Meat asked that we only rec one fic per Friday, which I will do from now on but didn’t want to waste all this effort!)

So - in no particular order… 

Pride by DrJLecter ( @drjlecter) 500 words
Teen And Up Audiences // F/F, F/M, M/M, Multi // Will Graham & Hannibal Lecter / Hugh Dancy & Mads Mikkelsen // 
Summary: They are shooting scenes for Hannibal at a real Pride Parade and everyone gets carried away in the elated atmosphere.

OMG! I fucking screamed whilst reading this and for a full 5 minutes after. I love everything I’ve read by this writer but this one is just magical. If you have 2 minutes to spare today you should be reading this!

Busted by FauxFidele  ( @hannimeow) - 2k words
Explicit // M/M // Will Graham/Hannibal Lecter // 
Summary: Will is busted for watching porn when Hannibal is away teaching a class at the local university. Cue the dirty pictures.

This is a wonderful tale from a fantastic writer! I was actually a little on edge reading this, not wanting Will to get found out but at the same time jealous on Hannibal’s behalf. For smut it definitely pulls the feels and the ending is just perfect!

We’ll meet again by Moonstruckidiot - 2k words
General Audiences // M/M // Will Graham/Hannibal Lecter // 
TAGS to note: MCD kind of? Some angst.
Summary: Hannibal Lecter and Will Graham died in each others arms after falling from a cliff into the Atlantic ocean; their bodies were lost to the sea.
37years later… Will walks into the art gallery of artist ‘Hannibal,’ both men discover a mutual interest in the sea
Or - Hannibal knows he is the reincarnation of Hannibal Lecter and he has been waiting for ‘his’ Will to come into his life.

This is absolutely wonderful and needs to be continued! I was hooked with the opening prologue and the rest of the story took my breath away! This is such a rich world, a new home for the characters we know and love.

Marbles by Llewcie ( @llewcie) - 5.5k words
Teen And Up Audiences // M/M // Nigel (Charlie Countryman)/Adam Raki // TAGS to note: underage as both characters are kids/teens (no u/a sex),bullying, mild angst
Summary: Adam moves to a new neighborhood and promptly loses a prized possession to the neighborhood bully. But when the tables are turned, Adam extracts a promise from Nigel that will follow them through the years. The friendship that develops as a result will end up meaning more to them than they ever could have anticipated.

I’m not going to lie, Llew is one of my favourite Spacedogs writers (you should also check out Craigslist and Merrie). This fic is heartbreaking in it’s journey and is just beyond amazing! Following these mismatched kids from enemies to friends to (eventually and very incredibly well done) lovers will make you weep in the best possible way!

Eunoia (series - 3 fics) by murdergatsby ( @ - 4k words
Mature, Teen And Up Audiences // M/M // Will Graham/Hannibal Lecter // TAGS to note: Temporary Character Death, some angst and panic, Drowning
Summary: Well mind, beautiful thinking. Post-The Wrath of the Lamb Murder Husband Softness™

I don’t think the tags do justice to how to the fluffy and soft aspects of this little series. It is just delightful and a wonderful with just the right balance of feels! This writer never disappoints and this is no exception!

Reeling Him In by Devereauxs_Disease ( @devereauxsdisease) - 4kwords
Explicit // M/M // Will Graham/Hannibal Lecter // 
Summary: Will wonders why Hannibal hasn’t kissed him, even though they’ve been dating for months. Hannibal would like to know what Will is talking about.

This is just glorious! I love this cracky version of the boys but with their usual *if only they’d talk to each other* misunderstandings! A fantastic ending that just proves what a food lover Hannibal is! 

Still Beautiful by fragile-teacup (Mrs_Gene_Hunt) ( @fragile-teacup) - 1k words
Explicit // M/M // Will Graham/Hannibal Lecter //
TAGS to note: Angst with a Happy Ending
Summary: A 1000 word post-TWOTL fic. Works as a stand-alone but is also an alternate take, from Hannibal’s POV, on a chapter from my current post-fall WIP fic, ‘The Marriage of Heaven and Hell’, which is written from Will’s POV. 

This is just such a beautifully written piece. The fact that so much passion and need is captured in 1000 words is just masterfully done on the part of the writer!

Physis by Chifuyu ( @staticraining) - 4k words
Teen And Up Audiences // M/M // Will Graham/Hannibal Lecter // 
Summary: After everything that has happened in Italy, there is still one last obstacle Will Graham has to overcome before he can try and pick up the broken pieces that once were his life: Being a witness at Hannibal Lecter’s trial.

The entire premise of this fic is fantastic, because of course Will is a compromised witness either way, and the characterisation of Lecter’s lawyer feels perfect. Watching Will squirm in the stand shouldn’t be this fun,and if it sounds like crack, it isn’t it is absolutely spot on!

Touch (Sweet Touch) by Hannigrammatic ( @hannigrammatic) - 1.5k words
Mature // M/M // Will Graham/Hannibal Lecter //
TAGS to note: Touch-Starved
Summary: Starvation of touch can be just as debilitating as a lack of nourishment. (or, Hannibal is distant after the fall, and Will misses him in more ways than he has words for.)

So refreshing, interesting and touching to see this focus on both Will and Hannibal, with snippets from Hannibal’s pov especially interesting, in what is often a scenario that focuses solely on Will. This was wonderfully done and gave me lots of feels!

Awakening by Rakusnow ( @rakusnow) - 1.5k words
Mature // M/M // Will Graham/Hannibal Lecter //
TAGS to note: Canon typical violence
Summary: They had recently moved to Bamfield, a small corner of the coast of Vancouver Island. They knew no-one and kept to themselves.

I just love the relationship that plays out in this fic, and blood lust Will is just wonderful!

Any Club That Would Have Us As Members by victorine ( @victorineb​) - 1.2k words
General Audiences // M/M // Will Graham/Hannibal Lecter
Summary:Will has always hidden parts of himself from other people. With Hannibal, that no longer seems necessary. Will wants to share every part of himself. And if that means settling in for a movie with a legendary killer and cannibal, well Will thinks that’s just fine…

Again a writer that I always enjoy, but I particular love this fic. It’s just so perfectly crafted and so well captured! Just…. urgh! The ease of their relationship and Will being able to be himself is just so beautiful and wonderfully written! But also so many feels! Will is delightfully written as free and easy. And his wonderful observations of Hannibal and their shared laughter paints them as best friends as well as murder husbands. An utter delight.

Defend Myself by The_owner ( @gio-hannigram) 1.7k words
Teen And Up Audiences // M/M // Will Graham/Hannibal Lecter //
TAGS to note: heavy angst, MCD.
Summary: Will’s heart pounded at Hannibal´s tone, there but at the same time so far away, almost lost. A whisper against his skin the only proof he was there, behind him.

This is a really beautiful fic that gave me a lot of feels!  Beautifully tragic, with rich imagery and the poetic confessions. I don’t often read heavy angst but I even loved the sadness here - because sometimes we need to explore this potential type of regret.

WIPS you should be reading!!

Whisked Away by shiphitsthefan ( @shiphitsthefan) - 25k word WIP
Explicit // M/M // Will Graham/Hannibal Lecter / Bedelia Du Maurier & Hannibal Lecter //
TAGS to note: Agoraphobia, Disordered Eating, Dom/sub Undertones, Non-Sexual Submission, Past Abuse,  Other Additional Tags to Be Added
Summary: Coffee Shop AU - Will has always seen too much of the lives of others to ever want one of his own. On the other hand, Hannibal, as proprietor of Whisked Away, his hobby coffee shop and café, is living the public life he’s always wanted. Still, he longs to be seen and understood for who he really is. Neither ever saw this coming.

THIS!!! OMG I am loving this so much!! I’m a sucker for coffee shop AUs and this has so much more beyond that. It is rich and complex and the characters are so incredibly well drawn from the show into this setting. It is a slow burn I am more than happy to bake in until I catch fire!

12 Steps Wayward by BloodToInkbonelines, & howlscastle - 17k word WIP
Explicit // M/M // Will Graham/Hannibal Lecter //
TAGS to note: Drug Use, Drug Addiction, Sex Addiction, Rehabilitation, Violent Thoughts, Canon-Typical Violence, Obsessive Behavior,Other Additional Tags to Be Added
Summary: AU where Will and Hannibal, both young and at the age where most would be attending university, meet while staying in a rehabilitation facility. They’re both there for different reasons. Will, who has been struggling with his sex addiction, immediately begins lusting after Hannibal, who is recovering from a drug addiction that caused him to have to drop out of med school.

As this continues the characters feel more and more like the Will and Hannibal we know, but in this incredibly different AU setting. The writers manage to weave together an amazing tale that is more than you would expect from the premise of “sex addict Will”. This is complex and well thought through and for being a slow burn(ish) incredibly damn hot!

Why are you smoking? by HotSauce418 ( @hotsauce418​) - 20k word WIP
Explicit // M/M // Will Graham/Hannibal Lecter / Will Graham/Nigel (Charlie Countryman) //
TAGS to note: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics OmegaVerse,  Alpha/Omega, Alpha Nigel, Omega Will, Alpha Hannibal, Mating, surprise bond, Other Additional Tags to Be Added
Summary: Set during Season 1 - Hannibal doesn’t make his move fast enough and Will ends up accidentally bonding with his doppelganger in the throes of heat.

I am a big fan of fluffy/non-abusive ABO (as it can often be used as an excuse for such). The premise of accidental bonding can have the potential to go down that route but this is not the case here. This expertly takes the characters and puts them in this situation in a way true to their characters. What happens next is fantastic and feels true - and oh dear lord Will and Nigel are such a good match (I guess I have enough room in my brain for another ship, right?!)

There’s actually a bunch more fics I could add in here but it will go on forever, so I will just end with recommending reading anything by @slashyrogue@starkaryen@taeaelin​ and @samui-sakura88​ they are just wonderful!

Why last night’s ep turned me into a Poor Unfortunate Soul

I’m really disappointed today.  Mostly because I wasn’t aware the Queens of Darkness would be reduced from three down to two, but also because, once again, this show falls back on the same disturbing habits they’ve developed.  So, you know, every time there’s a PoC on the show I worry – and with good reason.  In the end, the show doesn’t give a shit about its own product and CERTAINLY doesn’t care about how some really horrifying trends are perceived.

Keep reading

Bruce Banner + The Monster

I’ll say one thing for tagged brucenat hate, it always makes me think about my darlings that much more deeply.

Right now in the tag there’s a rant about how Natasha says she adores Bruce for being a pacifist but she isn’t there to see him threaten Wanda, so that must mean she doesn’t really know him and he’s a terrible person how dare he. 

Uh-huh. Let’s dissect.

Bruce: You got a lousy taste in men, kid.

Natasha: He’s not so bad. Well, he has a temper. Deep down he’s all fluff. Fact is, he’s not like anybody I’ve ever known. All my friends are fighters. And here comes this guy who spends his life avoiding the fight because he knows he’ll win.

This snippet of conversation showcases many things, including Bruce’s trademark self-deprecation, but nowhere does it say that Natasha thinks Bruce is a pure vision of heavenly light. The very first thing she acknowledges is his inner demon — that deep-seated rage that has been eating away at him nearly his whole life and, for almost a decade, has manifested itself as a literal monster.

But underneath that trauma, Natasha sees “fluff” — someone truly gentle who feels gut-wrenching remorse for the part of himself that is monstrous. 

Not to pile on the Shrek/Fiona jokes, but there’s that nice little onion analogy here. Roughly: • Bruce’s crispy outer layer is his PhD in snark, • underneath, the adorakable science nerd, • which belies the mad scientist who’ll break all the rules, • fueled by jealousy and insecurity, • that derives from his “dark passenger” (shoutout to captainjanek​) of trauma and rage, • that protects, the very scared, very young child within who was abused by his father, who watched his mother murdered, • all encasing the gentle soul Bruce Banner might have been had he grown up in peace.

And what does Bruce Banner want to do with all that history of violence and self-hatred and failed ambition? 

What he doesn’t want to do is exactly what he feels like doing always — smash — and that’s what Natasha is drawn to. 

Bruce Banner wants to be good. He wants to be a wanderer, someone who helps where he can and leaves when he can’t. He’ll put himself in exile, he’ll avoid the fight because he can’t lose, except to himself

In Bruce, Natasha sees someone who is constantly fighting against his monster to let himself be that huge dork he is inside a struggle Natasha “‘beep beep’ emojis/Children’s War participant” Romanoff knows a little something about. 

Now. The second piece of the argument says that all of that falls apart when Bruce threatens Wanda.

Wanda: I know you’re angry.

Bruce: Oh, we’re way past that. I could choke the life out of you and never change a shade.

This is a disturbing statement. It’s meant to be disturbing — Bruce is disturbed. There’s a capacity for violence inside of him that, if he embraced, would be truly monstrous. 

That’s another thing Natasha and Bruce have in common. Underneath their warmth, her passion and his rage, is something cold-blooded. Natasha can be who you want her to be. Bruce can walk away from the people he loves. 

What’s more, circumstances have rendered inside of them the ability to turn off their remorse and be the monster

But that’s not what they want for themselves. 

Bruce says he could choke the life out of Wanda. Bruce grabs her in a chokehold and says, ‘Try me.’ He warns her what he’s capable of, even though she already knows. She’s been in his head.

And that’s just it. The reason Bruce Banner admits in front of Tony and Steve just how at one with his monster he has the capacity of being.

Let’s all keep in mind that, yes, Wanda is girl half his age, but she is not defenseless and she is not an innocent. I think Wanda deserves redemption just as much as anyone else in the MCU, but let’s not forget that she — someone whose parents died as civilian casualties to a weapon of war — unleashed the Hulk on a city full of people with the explicit aim for him to cause as much collateral death and destruction of civilians as possible. Yes, she was abused, but she chose to be an abuser. 

And think about what Johannesburg means for Bruce. He had a home, he had a Team, he was open for “running with it.” The lullaby, more than anything, demonstrates that he felt safe for the first time in god knows how long. And Wanda Maximoff stripped that from him in the most personally violating way possible.

Like I said, Wanda deserves redemption as much as anybody, but don’t patronize her. She can dish it out, she can take it.

So, imagine Natasha was there to hear that speech. Do you really think she’d be horrified by Bruce? No. She’d be horrified for him. Because, in one more way, the world has dropped another dark layer on top of his humanity.