time to drown in SYRUP you guys
who drinks all the coffee: Siri. Susebron can’t hack the taste and has never understood why she likes it so much.
brings up adopting a pet: Susebron and cats. Susebron and tiny tiny kittens. Susebron and tiny tiny white fluffy kittens that start refracting light like mad in his presence. Tiny rainbow kittens running around the palace. How could Siri say no.
kills the bugs: Neither of them. They both see nothing wrong with bugs. There are big rhinoceros beetles that hang around the palace gardens and they’re pretty darn cute to watch.
cooks the meals: Siri. She used to have to work in the kitchens all the time back home. She’s kind of a cooking expert. Susebron helps with the spices.
starts getting into holidays way before they should: Susebron an D HE GETS TANGLED IN TINSEL AND THE RESULTING GLOW IS BLINDING
initiates the couple selfies: Siri is a giant fan of selfies and sends them through to Vivienna on a regular basis. All that Vivienna ever sends back are pictures of Nightblood and Vasher posing dramatically with her thumbs-up in the foreground.
forgets the birthdays and anniversaries: Neither of them, because Siri is a huge pushover when it comes to Susebron and she will do anything to see him smile. If that’s keeping track of every date and preparing in advance, she’ll do it.
always ends up with too much junk food after grocery shopping: Susebron, but that’s just because he offers to carry the bags. He and Siri eat a terrifying amount of junk food and it weighs a lot.
nicknames the other: Siri and Sebby, the true power couple of Hallendren.