1. Know yourself
You cannot love someone you don’t even know.
2. Accept that you have strengths and weaknesses. You have skills and problems.
Do a SWOT Analysis (strengths, weaknesses, opportunities, threats) of yourself if you want but remember, opportunities and threats are external. You don’t have control over them. But you can use your strengths and improve on your weaknesses, both of which are internal, to handle the external.
3. Disliking certain things about yourself is normal. That gives room for improvement. Improve. Don’t be lazy and choose the path of self loathing.
4. Forgive yourself
Understand that making mistakes is the way to grow. If you hadn’t fallen on your bum a couple hundred times you would have never learned to walk. If as a baby after one fall, after one mistake of breaking something, you would have decided to just sit in the corner and never try again, you would still be sitting there with the broken pieces. Don’t do that. Learn from your toddler self. Get up. And the only way you can do that is by forgiving yourself.
5. Accept that as of now you do not love yourself.
Lying to yourself won’t eventually lead you to believe it as the truth. Lying to someone you love is not a way to love them.
6. Disregard what others say about you. So much of the good and bad they tell you really has more to do with themselves; their mindset and mood, their motives and interest. Don’t let people fill in blanks for you. That won’t lead to a happy ending, it won’t lead to a story you can call your own.
7. Be patient with yourself, be kind. Being hard on yourself is a really stupid thing to do. It isn’t productive, it isn’t one bit effective and it is completely unnecessary.
8. Discard the idea that you are breakable. Reject the concept that someone can leave you broken. They can hurt you, yes and they can cause you an immense amount of pain but they cannot break you. You aren’t made of glass. Give your cells a little more credit. Give your heart a little more of it too.
9. When you realize that the grass is greener on the other side, don’t draw up plans to ruin that grass or come up with a way where you can camp on it and abandon your own grass. Instead, take a trip to the shop to buy some fertilizer and tend to your own grass. Upskill yourself constantly.
10. Learn new things. Invest time and energy in things that interest you.You didn’t learn to play piano in school but always wished to? Who said there is an age limit. In most cases the saying, ‘it is never too late’ stands absolutely true.
11. Look yourself in the mirror. You can admire or just observe. Look into your eyes. Look at your reflection. Just look. Have a see in what’s inside. Don’t look away. Have the courage to see the truth.
12. Spend time with yourself. Buy yourself flowers if flowers are what you love. Don’t wait to meet the right person to do the things you always wanted to. Go star gazing, skinny dipping. Solo travel. Do whatever you want to and can. Write your future/past self a letter. Cook yourself a meal. Buy yourself some ice cream. Click goofy selfies.
13. Learn to accept compliments. Be graceful. All you have to do is say ‘thank you’. And please don’t feel the immediate need of returning the compliment. You don’t always have to give when you get. Especially when you don’t really have anything to give. A ‘thank you’ and a smile are more than enough.
14. Learn to be okay in silence. The voices in your head? They terrorize you, I know. But trust me, they go away. They go away if you face them. There are no demons in your head. These are just echoes of your fears and insecurities. Listen to them. Breathe deep. Know that they are weak. Face them head on. And then ask them to leave.
15. Accept your body. However it is or it isn’t. It has accepted you in every possible way. Accept it and see how it accepts you even more. Accepting doesn’t mean not changing something that you can in a healthy way. It only means that your love is unconditional. Your love is whole. And that is the only way to love yourself. Wholly.
The goal of this post is to raise awareness to damaging behaviour towards a group otherwise ignored due to their academic prowess and supposedly problem-free lives, but not to hurt or offend other people. Fine if you agree that school isn’t important, but this is purely an education-based opinion.
PSA: SMART KIDS …
- hate being compared to
if you are the top of your class, every test is a problem. people will turn around when they get a result and try to see yours in order to evaluate themselves instead of take the grade they’ve been awarded. for example, instead of accepting you got a B, you see that the “smart kid” got a C and instantly feel better about yourself, or vice versa if they got more than you. this kind of behaviour is not only damaging to who you’re comparing to (since people often express their negative views on their grades towards you, commonly getting the “of course you would get an A” or “I can’t believe I got more than you!”) but also to yourself - of course in school you’re taught to compare yourself, but your biggest competitor is yourself and you should always be aiming to outdo your best attempt rather than what the “swot” gets.
- need to be supported regardless of their grades
a particularly sad experience I personally have is collecting my exam results last year. I went in with all my friends, they got their envelopes, jumped up and down in joy at what they got … it came to my turn, I saw what I got, I turned around to tell them - and they told me not to say a thing. they didn’t want to know! to an extent, I get this (see previous point about comparative self-worth) but when you achieve something, you wanted to be recognised and appreciated, especially by your friends. telling your smart friend not to share what they got on a paper is purely bad friendship - everyone’s successes, no matter how small or frequent, deserve to be celebrated.
- aren’t always bragging
this is a problem I’m facing even now. they rarely talk about their achievements or grades in fear of being disliked or viewed as competition. if somebody gets an A on a mock, they feel like they can barely say a thing because they don’t want to come off as lacking modesty or over-confident. how do you say things about how well you’re doing without offending, belitting or annoying other people?
- shouldn’t carry yourgroup projects
all I’m going to say on this one is that if you let the “smart kid” do all the work in school, you’re wasting your own time. if you have to be in lesson for fifty minutes anyway, you might as well learn, rather than waste another fifty minutes elsewhere revising for your exam!
- don’t always revise
some people revise. others don’t. be nice to your local “smart kid” - don’t assume they revised all day and night for that A, that they put in 100% effort all the time to validate yourself, or get mad when you hear them say they didn’t revise or are screwed for a test. People frequently don’t revise for tests since they have more important exams coming up for but it’s not their fault if they still get a decent grade. some people are more suited towards a particular subject and that’s okay, because you are too!
- have just as many worries
smart kids have worries too. they still fear about university applications, tests, job interviews, boyfriends, all the jazz that everyone else does. competency in a subject doesn’t ensure you a place. the worrying fact that exists is that there will always be someone smarter, someone more experienced, someone generally better than you, regardless of whether you are smart or not, therefore you shouldn’t get frustrated at people who are worried when you think they shouldn’t be.
- aren’t always well-behaved
they don’t all wear glasses. they don’t not have social lives. they don’t all care about school. just like everyone else, intelligence means squat if you’re not having fun. whilst you should always respect the school system, don’t assume that being smart means not making jokes or goofing off, or that doing those things will impact your intellectual performance in any way.
- have bad days
yes, I know I knew the answer yesterday. yes, I know I can do better than that. yes, smart kids have bad days! if an overachiever gets a lower mark than usual, be nice. it may make you feel good to have done better than the “nerd” but imagine how they feel about it if they are academically-conscious. if they’re nice to you, be nice to them. that’s all there is to it.
- want to help you
of course “smart kids” aren’t out to get you, they will obviously give you assistance if you ask for it. nonetheless copying someone’s work or getting them to do the work for you is wrong. it’s unfair to ask the “smart kid” for last night’s homework if you didn’t do it, or coast off their work because they sit a desk too close to you. keep your integrity when doing work.
- aren’t only good at academic subjects
2018 should be the year we reject the concept that only STEM subjects count, that anyone who majors in English or Art or Drama isn’t as intelligent as someone who does physics. recognise a degree for a degree, talent for talent, ability for ability. anybody can be a “smart kid”, it doesn’t mean you have to score perfect As or have some quantifiable measure. redefine smart to mean knowledgeable and suddenly everyone you know, even you, is a smart kid.
- can only have an academic job
leading on from this, don’t think that someone’s ability defines their future career. someone could be a killer biologist but want to go into dancing. let them! it’s their choice and nobody should be defining it as wasted potential.
- don’t feel intellectually superior
chances are, they don’t care about intelligence. it’s nice to have but you know what’s nicer? talking about Netflix, or football, or other interests with their friends we’re not numbers and grades, we’re people with passions, and intellect is a small part of a huge thing called personality that everyone has. especially at school age, an A* student isn’t thinking they can’t be friends with a D student. they’re thinking about what they’re having for dinner tonight, and when they can next hang out with their best friend.
- should never be belitted by teacher
finally, this is a general point that has affected a million students regardless of ability. teachers deserve respect but they can also lose it if they begin to treat the class unlike equals. smart kids may stereotypically be seen as teacher’s pets but in reality, it is often the other way round. they can’t count the times a teacher has deliberately skipped them when searching for an answer, even if they’re the only one with a hand up, or the amount of times they’ve been asked not to contribute, on both hands. everyone is entitled to an education so fair enough if a teacher wants to push less talkative students, but if it gets to the point where a smart kid has been stopped from talking for lessons on end, put on the spot with a particularly mean question or been downright bullied by the person who is supposed to be fair, speak up. the effects of being dampened can be long-lasting and hurtful, resulting in smart kids who no longer participate or enjoy school.
Again, this post wasn’t meant to offend anyone, or put myself up on a pedestal as a “smart kid”. Of course, there are positives to doing well at school, like good job opportunities and academic success, but I see lots of awareness raised for students who don’t do so good and feel like there should be balanced representation out here. The general moral from all of this is that everyone in education should be treated with respect and allowed to develop surrounded by support from peers and teachers regardless of their ability. This includes underachievers, overachievers, the coasters, the tryhards - any name you have for a type of student - 2018 is the year we’re eradicating education-based shaming.
oh yes please, teach me mr Watanuki, teach meeeeeeee everythiiing <3 how to be YANDEREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
private tutoring with Sakkun will be the beeest ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) <3 no seriously, he’s pretty good at math due to StrikeTanaka… >w>)! Ireallyneedthat.
at any rate, NO MORE EXAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMS \( *w*)/ !! I never have to study for school anymore… <3 ahhhh FREEDOM ( for now ~ ) now I gotta wait for all the results… ;w; hopefully everything will go fine. PLIIIIIIIIZZZZZZZZZZZ nevertheless, I’ll be able to draw more fanart from now on :D ! ( although I still have to deal with school business with classmates but there’s still more time than before ~ I already have some sketches for sth >^>! )
puuhh… hope you’ll do fine too >^>)9 !! Summer Holidays are up ahead !
I still don’t understand why Han and Leia named their son Ben? I mean Luke was really the only one with an intense connection with Obi-Wan/Ben. Han thought he was a crazy old man who believed in an ancient magical force. Leia didn’t really even interact with him. So I can only conclude that the naming might have gone down something like this:
Han: What about Peter?
Leia: Peter…yes Peter’s a nice na–
Luke: *Busts into the room*
Luke: HIS NAME SHALL BE BEN
Han: Kid, we barely even knew h–
Leia: Okay, but–
This here is another collab belle with @ask-ickle-mod, and it’s been a long time coming that’s for sure lol. She sent this to me before Halloween, and then I fell off and went on that hiatus so it’s been sitting around waiting for a long time. There used to be a lot more nightmare nights themeing as well but I cut it down cause February… heh… my 🅱️
Also this is a good time to mention, please don’t send me Sweetie’s in hopes that I’ll collab it. Now don’t take that the wrong way, I love that people are drawing Sweeties and I especially love that people are doing it for me and that they want to be a part of this series. It’s just that I have a lot of art on my plate, I’m doing convention prep as well as this collab series as well as personal art and I hate to say no to people that took the time to draw me something like that.
That said, if you’ve drawn a Sweetie Belle that you’re proud of and you just wanna show it off, @ me fam I love em.
Anyways, thanks again for the sketch ickle, sorry to make you wait to see it completed for so long lol