swords & spells

The Butlers

Context: the group consists of myself (Tiefling Rogue), a Half-Elf Warlock, a Drow Elf Bard, and a Half-Orc Fighter. We are currently in combat with some corrupt town guards; three of them, plus the guard captain. Now during this fight, the following all happen:

  • I take a page from Assassin’s Creed, climbing a building before the fight begins and just taking shots at them with my crossbow, constantly passing stealth checks to avoid being seen, and I eventually kill one guard by rolling maximum damage with a bonus
  • Our Fighter, due to having a total AC of 19, tanks every single hit while dueling with the captain, and eventually does enough damage that the captain takes himself out with a nat 1 by accidentally hitting himself in the head with the hilt of his own sword
  • Our Warlock casts spells from a distance, before eventually using Witch Bolt - which he refers to as “Emperor Palpatine lightning hands” - to outright disintegrate a guard
  • Our Bard keeps casting Vicious Mockery to make the guards shoot at him rather than run for reinforcements, casts plenty of buffs and debuffs, and also rolls a nat 20 to get himself back up immediately after being knocked prone
  • During all this, the Bard is the only one on our team to take any damage, and any attempts to send the guards for reinforcements (which was apparently supposed to be the primary difficulty of this battle) are consistently thwarted by Vicious Mockery, well-aimed crossbow bolts, Thaumaturgy distractions, and nat 20 counters to disengagement attempts

One guard remains, already damaged, and he freezes up after witnessing all this, screaming at us, “What are you guys?!

It’s my turn, and I see my chance. I successfully roll to jump off the rooftop, causing the guy to look up at me as I jump down, land right on him, and hold my dagger to his throat when he’s on the ground prone. I then proclaim…

“We are the Butlers. Because we clean up.”

Our Warlock, without missing a beat: “I facepalm in response.”

And thus I slit that guard’s throat to the sound of my allies laughing. My attempts to get the group officially named “The Butlers” have been moderately unsuccessful, but I will not give in.

beauty and the beast sentence meme

feel free to change the starters and things to fit your muse!

  • “who could ever learn to love a beast?”
  • “well, it’s my favorite! far off places, daring sword fights, magic spells, a prince in disguise!”
  • “here’s where she meets prince charming. but she won’t discover that it’s him ‘til chapter three.”
  • “my father is not crazy! he’s a genius!”
  • “i’m not really sure i fit in here. there’s no one i can really talk to.”
  • “oh _____, have a heart!”
  • “you know, there’s not a girl in town who wouldn’t love to be in your shoes.”
  • “is he gone?”
  • “for once, it might be grand to have someone understand. i want so much more than they’ve got planned.”
  • “______, there’s a girl in the castle!”
  • “take me instead.”
  • “please spare my daughter! please!”
  • “told you she was pretty, _____. didn’t i?”
  • “cheer up, child. it’ll turn out alright in the end, you’ll see.”
  • “try to be patient. the girl has lost her father and her freedom all in one day.”
  • “it’s no use. she’s so beautiful and I’m…well, look at me!”
  • “please attempt to be a gentleman.”
  • “i don’t wanna get to know him! i don’t wanna have anything to do with him!”
  • “she’ll never see me as anything but a monster.”
  • “promise or no promise, i can’t stay here another minute!”
  • “by the way, thank you for saving my life.”
  • “true, that he’s no prince charming. but there’s something in him that i simply didn’t see.”
  • “i’ll tell you when you’re older.”
  • “could you read it again?”
  • “you don’t have time to be timid!”
  • “and when the moment is right, you confess your love!”
  • “are you happy here with me?”
  • “you mean…i’m free?”
  • “after all this time, he’s finally learned to love.”
  • “______, why’d you go away? don’t you like us anymore?”
  • “if it’s a fight they want, we’ll be ready for them!”
  • “what’s the matter, ______? too kind and gentle to fight back?”
  • “at least i got to see you one last time.”
  • “are they gonna live happily ever after, ______?”

Queen of Swords.

Clear your mind of uncertainty. Abandon doubt. Accept yourself for who you are. Cast aside the opinions of strangers. Be not influenced by the words of a fool. Know that your throne is built upon a foundation of strength.

Anonymous said: Does Sayuri have her own Cursed Gear? All I’ve seen her use are fuda and that weird paper sword thing.

According to my fanbook, the sword is indeed her cursed gear called Kukuri, the two kanji for the name being Chrysanthemum and the other one for justice/logic/truth. It is a possession type of the Dakini series. “A spell sword. Even though it is low in durability, it can be used any number of times as long as there are spells.” (The kanji used is along the lines of “renewable resource”)

#rfabseptember16 Book Photo Challenge:

Day 22: Paperback vs Hardback.

As much as I love how gorgeous hardbacks are, I can’t deny my love for paperbacks. They’re cheaper and easier to carry around and read. 😊❤️📚

Current Mood

Me: *reads article about how women can’t do, shouldn’t be allowed to do, or aren’t good at something*

Me: IM GOING TO PLAY DRAGON AGE BECAUSE FEMALES CAN BE FUCKING DRAGON SLAYING, GREAT SWORD SWINGING, SPELL CASTING, ARROW SHOOTING, BREACH CLOSING, BLIGHT STOPPING, CITY SAVING, DARK SPAWN KILLING, ARISHOK DUELING, KINGDOM LEADING, COURT APPROVAL EARNING, FATE DECIDING, WORLD SAVING BAD ASSES AND THEY AREN’T TOLD OTHERWISE BY THE MOTHERFUCKING PATRIARCHY.


No, seriously. I don’t know how much the game developers know how utterly encouraging it is for me to be able to have amazing female protags and companions as role models.

7

Jaime x Brienne: Beauty and the Beast

Belle

(But you’ve read it twice!)
Well, it’s my favourite!
Far-off places…
daring sword fights, magic spells,
a prince in disguise.


Oh
Isn’t this amazing
It’s my favourite part
Because you’ll see
Here’s where
she meets Prince Charming
But she won’t
discover that it’s him
Till chapter three

(Beauty and the Beast 1991)

4

Ever since Fire Emblem: Heroes came out I’ve been on a real Fire Emblem kick, so here’s Viri as a tactician! (plus some closeups)

Because she trained herself to hold tomes with her tail rather than her hands, Viri is able to wield a sword and cast spells simultaneously! Viri’s magic also has an “eye of truth” theme, as a kirin’s powers allow them to distinguish the amount of good or evil within others (ノ・ω・)ノ゙.+:。

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via @disneystyle

Overall denim dresses are everywhere this season! Pair them with a white shirt and some black shoes and you can easily DisneyBound Belle’s dress. I’ve added Belle’s bow accessory as a detail on her purse. In this scene, Belle reads her favorite book (about far off places, daring sword fights, magic spells … and a prince in disguise) to a flock of village sheep—which is why I’ve given her the book pendant and the adorable three- finger lamb ring.

Beauty and The Beast (musical) Lyric Meme
  • "Once upon a time, in a faraway land, a young prince lived in a shining castle."
  • "Beauty is found within."
  • "For who could ever learn to love a beast?"
  • "Little town, it's a quiet village. Everyday like the one before."
  • "Every morning just the same since the morning that we came to this poor, provincial town."
  • "That girl is strange, no question."
  • "There must be more than this provincial life!"
  • "It's my favorite! Far off places, daring sword fights, magic spells, a prince in disguise."
  • "It's no wonder that her name means beauty. Her looks have got no parallel."
  • "No beast alive stands a chance against you. And no girl alive, for that matter."
  • "And don't I deserve the best?"
  • "Here in town it's only she who is beautiful as me."
  • "Look there he goes! Isn't he dreamy?"
  • "He's such a tall, dark, strong, and handsome brute."
  • "It's a pity and a sin she doesn't quite fit in."
  • "Do you think I'm odd?"
  • "You are your mothers daughter, therefore you are class."
  • "No matter what you do, I'm on your side."
  • "No matter what they say, you make me proud."
  • "I pray that you remain exactly as you are."
  • "You've been dreaming just one dream nearly all your life."
  • "Will you be some he-mans property? Good news! That he-man's me."
  • "I can see that we will share all that love implies."
  • "All's well that ends with me."
  • "Can you imagine? He asked me to marry him!"
  • "I want adventure in the great wide somewhere."
  • "For once it might be grand to have someone understand."
  • "I want so much more than they have planned."
  • "I don't deserve to lose my freedom in this way."
  • "If you think that what you've done is right, well then, you are a fool."
  • "My hearts far, far away. Home is too."
  • "As my life has been altered once, it can change again."
  • "It will turn out alright in the end. You'll see."
  • "I hope that we'll be friends though I don't know you well."
  • "You may find home here too."
  • "That girl has tangled with the wrong man."
  • "Every guy here'd love to be you."
  • "There's no man in town as admired as you."
  • "There's no man in town half as manly."
  • "As a specimen yes, I'm intimidating."
  • "I use antlers in all of my decorating."
  • "I'm afraid I've been thinking."
  • "I won't even be mildly remorseful."
  • "How long must this go on, this cruel trick of fate?"
  • "Is there no one who can show me how to win the world's forgiveness?"
  • "It is with deepest pride and greatest pleasure that we welcome you tonight."
  • "Be our guest!"
  • "A dinner here is never second best "
  • "If you're stressed it's fine dining we suggest."
  • "Life is so unnerving for a servant who's not serving."
  • "Our command is your request."
  • "In my twisted face, there's not the slightest trace of anything that even hints of kindness."
  • "Deep within is utter blindness, hopeless as my dream dies."
  • "Loves a lost illusion."
  • "No beauty could move me."
  • "If I can't love her, no passion could reach me."
  • "No lesson could teach me how I could love her and made her love me too."
  • "If I can't love her, then who?"
  • "Long ago, I should have seen all the things I could have been."
  • "No point anymore, if I can't love her."
  • "If I can't love her let the world be done with me."
  • "There's something sweet and almost kind."
  • "I wonder why I didn't see it there before."
  • "But then...she's never looked at me that way before..."
  • "Who'd have ever thought that this could be?"
  • "True, that he's no Prince Charming, but there's something in him that I simply didn't see."
  • "It just so happens that this is the perfect book to read aloud."
  • "There may be something there that wasn't there before."
  • "I know how it feels to be different and I know how lonely that can be."
  • "The day we have waited for may be here at hand!"
  • "I'll be courting again, chic and sporting again."
  • "Let my early retirement commence."
  • "It's the simplest deal in your whole foul career."
  • "Tale as old as time, true as it can be."
  • "Just a little change, small to say the least."
  • "Both a little scared, neither one prepared."
  • "Bittersweet and strange, finding you can change. Learning you were wrong."
  • "No spell has been broken."
  • "No point anymore if she can't love me."
  • "If I didn't know better, I'd think you have feelings for this monster."
  • "We're not safe until he's dead."
  • "He'll wreak havoc on our village if we let him wander free."
  • "It's time to take don't action, boys. It's time to follow me."
  • "It's a nightmare but it's one exciting ride."
  • "We're not coming home til he's dead. Good and dead!"
  • "We don't like what we don't understand. In fact, it scares us."
  • "Hearts ablaze, banners high, we go marching into battle."
  • "You came back."
  • "Don't talk like that. We're together now. Everything will be fine."
  • "At least I got to see you one last time."
  • "Don't you know how you've changed me."
  • "I found my home. You're my hone. Stay with me."
  • "Don't you recognize the beast within the man who's here before you?"
  • "Two lives have begun now. Two hearts become one now."