sweet lord jesus baby in my head

Alright listen up, some real shit okay? I will openly and honestly admit…no, not admit, state that I think Lucy Heartfilia is a really good looking girl. Like if I saw her in real life, walking by me. I would spin my head so hard, I triple “The Exorcist” myself, if ya get what I mean. Now…Hiro…My dear friend. Why you gotta post this?!

I NEARLY DIED BRO. LUCY! TANNED?! LIKE SWEET BABY LORD JESUS! I needed every possible fruit on this planned to keep myself from losing all my vitamins in body! LIKE, I…I love it and I am not worthy to have witnessed this on a cloudy sunday London evening. Thank you. 

PS: Fuck you Natsu (not really because I love you too man) for having a girl like her.  I am gonna sound like a father and say Don’t you dare make her cry in your relationship which you honestly did like….what 5 times this past arc? BUT I AM SAYING, STAY LOYAL, STAY RESPECTFUL AND HAVE FUN….but don’t make her cry aight?

Alcor the Musical (only with a better title)

Okay, so imagine with me now: it’s generations, centuries and then some in the future. The Twin Souls novels are ancient, and while they are and have always been technically literary trash, their ideas and characters have proven…resilient. It helps perhaps that they’re based on an actual super-powerful supernatural entity, and that the myth and lore and baseless rumors do have a way of capturing popular imagination. They’ve spawned countless spin-off novels, comics, movies and TV shows. There are spoofs and cartoons and character cameos have cropped up in everything from puppet shows to comic strips. Alcor and his crew are practically Arthurian in scope by now, with the exception that everybody knows for sure that Alcor exists.

Then some writer teams up with some composer and they find themselves a producer, and together they create a full-fledged Musical Theater Production based on fragments of Alcor legend woven together into a Whole New Tale.

It starts with a pair of siblings - twins - named Tyrone and Terra. They have a musical number about their thoroughly ordinary human life, maybe with a bit of Disney Princess “There Must Be More Out There” or “I Just Don’t Fit In Here” thrown in for flavor. Somewhere in the course of Act 1 Tyrone meets a demon named Mizar, a powerful but secretive (and beautiful) being who claims she needs his help. He is intrigued but suspicious because he’s a Thoroughly Ordinary Human and how could he help a demoness fight against any sort of great shadowy evil?

Meanwhile Terra meets a charming and dapper young man - William Riddle perhaps? - and is completely swept away by him.

Somehow all through the bulk of the musical the twins manage not to run into each others crushes or whatever despite there being several songs about the matter and they start to grow apart because neither one understands what the other is doing or something? (Bear with me, I have no middle structure to this narrative, but I assume the writer of this mess in canon did. Just know there is much music, because it is a musical.)

Then, at last, the climax. William Riddle is actually the demon Cipher, escaped from his ancient prison when his old foe and jailer Alcor the Dreambender vanished from the Dreamscape some eighteen (or however long) years ago. He has spent these years searching in vain for Alcor, who took human form out of a longing to understand people and would therefore be weakened and powerless. Mizar had been searching for her love to protect him. There’s probably an entire song to this effect. Cipher’s part is probably really jazzy or the like.

Cipher kills Terra, having just been leading her on in hopes of confirming whether her rather familiar twin brother was actually his nemesis or else an actual human. He’s about to kill Tyrone when Mizar sweeps in to save him, and while the battle moves away we get a moving musical number where Tyrone mourns his twin sister’s death, regains his memories and power as Alcor, and transforms back to defeat Cipher once again and to rejoin his love Mizar, having been freed from the confines of the earth and the deal he had made.

And all in all Dipper, the real Alcor, hates this musical for so many reasons. There’s too much terrible ridiculous fiction (Mizar was not his romantic anything for the love of god!) and too many fragments that actually do reflect painful reality (the two times he had a twin sister and eventually lost her - though not quite as directly to Bill as in the play) and just too many corny songs (plus a couple that are so catchy he can’t get the damn tunes out of his head and he hates them all the more for it) and it’s all so over dramatic it’s ridiculous.

Plus there’s a new wave of fangirls who now think he can (and maybe even will) sing, among all their other usual embarrassing requests.

Untitled - Chapter 2

Hello again! As promised, I wrote another chapter ^.^

Still don’t know what I’m doing or where I’m going with this. And I’m sorry if this chapter is shit, I really tried my best to make it interesting, haha.

And naturally, sorry for any errors! For those of you who read my first chapter when I very first posted it, you may want to go look at it again if it was unclear to you, I made a lot of edits to make it easier to read! 

*Quick synopsis of this chapter: Basically Rae and Finn are now in his house, and well. It goes from there, haha.

http://fckyas-mmfd.tumblr.com/post/73359366536/surprise - first chapter

Chapter 2

Finn took a hold of Rae’s hand as they began walking upstairs to his room. Rae felt a knot begin to form in her stomach, a knot tighter than any knot she’s ever had form in her gut.

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Enough (A Joshifer one shot)

 “Away in the manger, no crib for a bed, the little lord Jesus lay down his sweet head…”

“You know, I’m still waiting on that Grammy nod for you.” Josh whispers, peering around the corner of the baby’s nursery after following my voice. I’m sitting in the rocking chair holding our baby boy, Sammy, in my arms and singing to him. It’s Christmas Eve, and the lighting in the room is a dim and a warm yellow. The lamp behind me is turned to its lowest setting, which is making it hard for me to even make out Josh standing in the doorway.

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As the doctor drops the placenta
From his blood soaked hands
Into the steel bowl
And sets it aside
He turns to me and says,
“Whatever you do, don’t touch this.”

Why the fuck would I ever want to touch it?
I don’t even want to look at it
I wish I could unsee and unhear
Everything I’ve witnessed
For the past thirty-two hours

Nothing I’d ever read or seen or heard
Could possibly have prepared me
For the squirting
My God, the squirting
Blood and feces shot across the room
In all directions
Dripping from the walls
Spraying and coating
All inhabitants of the room

And the screaming and cursing
“Fucking goddamnit motherfucking son of a bitch.”
And “I’m going to kill you and rip out your spine.
You stupid fucking bastard
You did this to me.”
Hour after hour after endless hour
As long as I live
Never again
Do I want to witness
Someone I care about
In this much pain

And just when you think
It can’t get any worse
They pull out the scissors
Sweet, suffering Jesus H Christ
What are they doing with those scissors?
God no. Not that
Eeeeeeeeeeeyyyyyyyyyaaaaaaaaaa
I think that was me screaming
Oh my baby. My poor, poor baby

And then it’s the suction device
My child’s head stuck in plastic receptacle
All I can see
Deer lord in heaven
I can’t tell
If it’s alive or dead
Why won’t it breath or move
Do something, goddamnit.
Be fucking alive
Please God in heaven
I’ll do anything you want
Be anything you want
Just let my baby be alive

And then
All is quiet
Like time and the universe
Are beginning from this instant
You could hear a pin drop
As the doctor
Puts my child
Into my arms
I don’t know if it’s a boy or a girl
It doesn’t matter
All that matters
All that has ever mattered
Is the endless…connected…universe
That was always there
But becomes apparent…obvious…impossible to deny
When my child
Opens his eyes

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