suzy is me and i am suzy

Strange Magic FanFic – “Redamancy”

Redamancy (n.) – The act of loving the one who loves you; a love returned in full.

Love covers a strange and magical spectrum, and Bog and Marianne discuss being different. A sequel of sorts to Spectrum.

Dedicated to @dainesanddaffodils and @sophaoat, my bestest besties and who helped me out immensely with their thoughtful and frank discussions with me on such subjects. You girls are the best, and I love you both dearly <3

This is one of those fanfics I’ve been wanting to do for a while now, I won’t lie. It seems all too appropriate to finally write it for Valentine’s Day, a day where we celebrate love in all its delight and diversity.

Given my own sexuality and experience with romance and attraction, this story is very close to my heart, and I dearly hope it provides even the merest inch of the same comfort it gives to me. Not all of us have security of a society that accepts or even understands us, but please know this – you are loved, and I am one of the many who loves you. And in the words of this beautiful movie, everyone deserves to be loved…

All my lofe to you, my darlings. Happy Valentine’s Day <3


Bog rolled over, the mossy spread of his bed making the crackle of scales that usually accompanied such a movement muffled to an almost plush pitch, and raised a brow heavy with contentment at the Fairy Princess beside him, her elegant lean against the headboard of his bed a stark contrast to the sprawling tangle of limbs he currently was. “What is it? More inane comments from dusty old fools?”

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What she says: I’m fine


Strange Magic Fanfic - "A Beastly Beauty and a Beautiful Beast"

Once upon a time, there is a Beauty, and there is a Beast.

Can one not be both?

Originally written for Strange Magic Week Day 1: Fairy Tales. Unsurprisingly, I knew exactly which Fairy Tale AU I wanted to tackle…

I’ve wanted to do a Strange Magic Beauty and the Beast AU for some time now, seeing as its my favorite fairy tale. But I was hesitant to actually write it, uncertain in how to handle it. For me, Strange Magic is one of the best subversions of the classic Beauty and Beast tale because Bog is a Beast and he does not physically change. His monstrousness and beastliness is not a curse inflicted upon him, it’s his natural state. If there’s any curse in Strange Magic, it’s the fact that Bog is so willing to believe he is too hideous to be loved, to resign himself to misery and heartache. 

To do an AU where Bog is transformed into something more classically appealing? It would be to tear down one of the things I most adore about this movie, its bravery and commitment in showing that there is nothing wrong in being a Beast, and that everyone deserves to be loved. I couldn’t do that.  

But then I came up with a twist that I feel stays true to both the spirit of Beauty and the Beast and Strange Magic, and I am so eager to share it with you…!

You will notice that I combined elements from both the original Beauty and the Beast tale and with the Disney version - I love both of them and wanted to see if I could make something that honors both of them whilst still being fresh and new. 

I sincerely hope you enjoy this story - it took over my life the best of way, and I am eager to see what you think! 


Once upon a time, there is a Beauty, and there is a Beast.

This is the tale we know.

A curse was cast.

A flower – a rose, perhaps a primrose, fresh with dew and jealously guarded – is plucked.

A sacrifice is sworn, a vow made.

A girl walks into darkness, head held high and burning bright.

Once upon a time, there is a Beauty, and there is a Beast.

Can one not be both?

Her sister’s fingers, sweetly tracing the petals, softly touching the stems and giving gentle little tugs until the blossom is pulled free from the iron of the earth, the darkness of the damp soil.

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Sad Marianne expression studies

Inspired by her heart break scenes from the movie and suzie-guru‘s fanfiction.

I remembered the hurt in Marianne’s eyes when she saw Roland cheating on her and other sad eyes in the movie. So I wanted to play with her facial expressions. And I also reread chapter 4 of Between the Shadow and The Soul to get into the mood.

I like drawing fairy queen armour for Marianne and I am not ashamed of it.

I wanted to post that pic of Dan wearing Suzy’s glasses without getting shippy there, BUT you all know I am TRASH. So, I AM IN SO MUCH PAIN OVER THE FACT THAT DAN IS OVER THERE JUST HANGING OUT WITH ARIN AND SUZY. Being fucking idiots. Imagine how much Arin laughed with Dan put those glasses on. My egoflapbang heart. 

so i’ve been following mort3mer’s vlogs and makeup vids for quite awhile, and it really pains me to hear about her thyroid issues because i myself had a scare way back when and was diagnosed with hyperthyroidism. thankfully, i am doing okay and wish the same for suzy. i hope the future brings her happiness and health <3

so here’s a portrait of suzy with some moths (she is an AWESOME taxidermist). Go check out her stuff on youtube!!

For anyone wanting to see Arin’s reply to all this Suzy nonsense

I’m absolutely impressed.

It has been my sincere effort to approach the subreddit with positivity and encouragement, and I apologize for the tone I am about to strike, but I don’t know any other way to phrase it.

I read that all people want is an apology. There is an apology. And now it’s like the apology is the worst possible thing that could’ve ever happened. It makes me think that, even if Suzy were to do something as drastic as refund everyone, nobody would care, or it would make people angrier.

Not to mention this person who is criticizing Suzy at the heart of all this detective work has been harassing Suzy’s customers under multiple twitter handles and, from what it looks like, fabricating evidence? Suzy has made countless reports to Twitter for this person’s alternate accounts and unethical actions.

The only difference between Suzy and me here is that Suzy is selling a product and my product is free. I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing running a business, and I’m sure I’ve made some equally careless if not EVEN MORE careless moves in my business practices. The point is that they’ve been owned up to, and that is what Suzy has done, and yet she is being vilified. She is not saying “no no, guys, I swear, the parts were bought locally!” she admitted they were not and apologized, without much of an excuse aside from admitting that she’s human. Have any of you here bought from her store specifically because she said her parts were bought locally? Surely Suzy would love to make good on that claim if that happened to you.

However, the request to refund all customers is bananas. People are upset over a post on this Subreddit seen by, at most, 3000 people, who I guarantee are not the target demographic for her shop. Not only that, but it was a reactionary post, and not a post overtly advertising her shop to the subreddit. There’s no text anywhere in her store stating her parts and accessories were bought locally, and she apologized for claiming they were elsewhere. All the descriptions in her shop are honest and fair. If you have a problem with the semantics of claims like “handmade,” then there is really no arguing, that’s like arguing a fruit snack is deceptive for listing it contains “natural flavors.” If you’re worried about her selling a product that contains parts from other sellers then you should be holding artists who sell perler bead sprites of existing characters as necklaces and magnets under as much scrutiny for not making the Perler beads or the magnets or the sprites themselves. Not saying that they should be, because they shouldn’t.

So what “shady” business practices are left? That she sells her items for a price that she researched via art shows and found out what people were willing to pay for her work? How is that shady? Is it shady that Jackson Polluck’s paintings sell for millions? Art is subjective, and it is simply a fact that something as trivial as a dot drawn on a piece of paper has a fluctuating value based on who drew that dot. We’re not Wal-Mart, we don’t have to sell absolutely everything we make as artists at cost.

If someone’s not interested in buying Suzy’s items for whatever reason, that’s fine, but this sort of micro-policing is absolutely ridiculous. Reveal all of her sources for parts and specimens? When has that ever been a common practice among product makers aside from marketing stunts (which are mostly lies anyway)? Did anyone ever demand that Hasbro tell their sources for that 100 dollar Transformer because it was way too expensive for a hunk of plastic? No, they would say “that’s too expensive for my interests” and go on with their lives. No one researches Hasbro’s sources in a deceptive manner to find out that it only costed them 4 dollars to produce that toy and then personally attack those responsible. You strive as a creator of a product and the owner of a business to make your products at as low a cost as possible while retaining as much quality as possible while finding a price people are willing to pay for what the product is. It is always a balance, and it’s careless and silly to buy only expensive things just because they’re expensive and justify the cost. You can see by Suzy’s Etsy rating that her customers are happy with the quality of her items, because if the items were cheap, or bad, she wouldn’t have such high ratings, and I have no reason to believe the ratings are because the customers assumed the items costed a certain amount of money to produce since nothing like that is implied in the descriptions of the items. Simply put, it is not a selling point.

I’m disappointed that this sort of highly vitriolic discussion is happening on this subreddit, which as of late has been very fair and goodhearted. To entertain someone obviously trying to vilify more than “save future customers” seems highly indicative to the overall tone I have seen toward Suzy, although I’m sure that’s a very controversial thing to say since no one wants to admit they don’t have saint-like level-headed perspectives of the things we do. This subreddit and moreover /r/ventgrumps does not strike me as a place teaming with “future customers” needing to be “saved,” but rather an easy place to get a rise out of folks who already have a negative disposition towards Suzy. The sort of language being thrown around from the get-go to describe the topic in discussion is just malicious at its most fair, although I won’t discount the few who have said as much as I have in terms of what should actually be considered an issue or not.

What I don’t think anyone understands or knows is that Suzy has refused again and again to post about her shop on her channel, and it wasn’t until I hounded her to do so that she reluctantly did it. She did NOT want her sales to be influenced by her fanbase, she wanted her work to speak for itself, and she wanted her success in business to be as a result of the skillful handling of her shop. I’ve never talked about her shop on Grumps and we’ve never done a call to action on any Grumps social media, so to claim that she’s taking advantage of hers or my fans is silly. I have very little patience for people trying to bring someone down for trying to make something of themselves while owning up to the things that they’ve done wrong. Suzy is not trying to pull one over on anyone, she’s an independent online shop owner who is figuring out the do’s and don'ts of the trade by diving in head-first and doing craftwork that brings her joy.

To hear her ask me “should I just stop being on Game Grumps?” in the most sullen, defeated tone I’ve ever heard in order to protect the one thing that fills her with excitement the most breaks my fucking heart. Of all of us, Suzy has been the one who has come up with the most ideas for acknowledging and appreciating fans. She was the one who thought of sending signed postcards to people, she is the one who opened up the instagram and proposed the ideas of “takeovers” to give fans a more personal look at us, she is the one most consistently retweeting and acknowledging fan-made content on her Twitter and the Game Grumps twitter, and she is the one who hangs up fan-made art in the office. When you hear her say that she gets frustrated with fans, she is talking about instances like this, not the fanbase as a whole, and I can certainly see where she’s coming from, because I, too, am very frustrated.


Psychic Circle

I took these a few months back and am only now getting to posting them.

The necklace and and taxidermy critters are from the absolutely amazing Etsy shop PsychicCircle. The shop is run by @flapflaps.

These are seriously fantastic pieces and I’m slowly starting my own collection. Since taking these I’ve gotten one more and I definitely don’t plan stopping here! 

Please go check Suzy’s amazing shop out!

Special thanks to @juliaivanhatake for letting me dress her up and use her as a model!

All photos taken by me

Please don’t use without permission

Long Ass rant about stupid people who let the Suzy and the SayA fandom look awful.

Ok I am actually not the person who vent about things especially not about stupid people on the internet but know what? Enough is definitely enough, I am so damn tired of all the bullshit this two fandoms gave me the past few days. 

I am ashamed to call myself a SayA, sincerely. I am ashamed to be a part of this messed up fandom, ashamed of the shit these four angels have go through just because brainless people sit at home in front of their computer on their damn ass and leave stupid comments on the internet and feel so almighty. 

Like seriously, how boring must your life be if you if you are that much obsessed about someone that you have to stalk their damn life and call out each little detail about them you don’t like? Don’t you have any hobbies? Like seriously, go buy yourself a good video game and let your aggression’s there but not on those four perfect human beings. 

Suzy and and the other 3 are not that close anymore? So what? what is the actually fucking matter even IF this is true? They are co-workers, not bff’s for life, do you actually know how much Suzy is working? Do you sincerely think that she got the nerves plus the time to go and hang out after a probably 20 hours day to hang out with her girls? THE ONLY THING SHE WANNA DO IS SLEEP FOR GODS SAKE! She is not there to please you 24/7. Of course Min, Fei and Jia got more time so they spend more time with each other! And do you actually know what it does to a friendship if there are people who always say how beautiful and gorgeous your friend is and you are sitting next to her and be like “well yeah hello I am breathing as well”, you might not think like that but I can assure you its not a nice feeling, that’s how me and my ex-best friend grew apart. It just happens, people come and people go that’s the circle of life. Those girls don’t have to force themselves to do a lovely dovey relationship with each other just because you want them to. It’s not everything about you ok? And how I said, Suzy is probably working 20 hours a day if, less more more I don’t care tbh, she for sure has better things to do like.. sleeping maybe? then to go to any parties or what not. 

Where we come to my next point already, “The other girls live well from suzy’s money, don’t work and party all day”, ok first of all, if I would meet you in real life I would slap you right away, because you got some nerves, probably sitting at home the whole day, in front of your PC, doing nothing but bashing people on the anonymity state of the internet but dare to say other HARD WORKING people are lazy and do nothing. Do you really think just because you don’t see daily updates like pictures or videos that the girls aren’t working? Do you even know what it means to be an idol? No for sure you did not. And just to tell you, Fei has done 11 variety shows in the last year and tons of photo shoots, Jia just finished filming her movie in china and Min just stared in a Web Drama AND is a part-time MC on After School Club, aside from that had she several YouTube projects along with her own dance videos she uploaded. Sure, they might not get as many jobs as Suzy does but they do work just as much as every other idol in Korea.  

“The girls living from her money” when please WHEN will this stupid FALSE rumor stop to spread around like a wild fire? Yes it was like this once, 2 years ago, where JYP still split their income but it is NOT like that anymore, Suzy herself said that on her twitter and on several interviews but as long as you got some shit to nag about you are happy right even its true or not. And I just want to remind you, there were once a time, were miss A was really successful, this time was BGGG, Breath and Goodbye Baby era, the time BEFORE Suzy was that popular, Suzy was pretty much hated by a lot of people at that time to be honest and Suzy lived well from the other girls money as well, because back then Min was the money main maker. Netziens even wanted Suzy out of miss A because her dance lacked a lot back then, so she lived well from miss A’s money right? So why should it be ok like this but not the other way around? You people make NO sense at all. 

“This photo and this photo and photo proves that Suzy and Miss A are no friends anymore” — “Miss A are bullying Suzy” …. “Suzy is not following the others Instagram”, let me state this. I don’t follow any of my close friends on Instagram nor Twitter, why? because I see them every day so why the hell should I follow them? I don’t even have half of them on my Facebook just because it is not needed, are you basing their real life seriously on some social net works? Just because your life consists of the Internet and Social Networks only it doesn’t mean others give a damn about such ridiculous useless things as Instagram or Twitter.  Also all what I have seen on the recent miss A pictures are a happy Miss A and a damn tired Suzy, if you haven’t noticed her panda eyes, that girl is beyond tired and needs some rest, if I am tired I am not jumping around making selfies all day long as well, do you? see, why expect this from Suzy, Jia, Min or Fei? 

Let me state this one last time, even if Suzy, Jia, Fei and Min aren’t close anymore, it is none and sincerely NONE of your business if they are or not. It is their private life and they can do whatever they want with it. 


if you find any typos, you may keep them.