survival wisdom

If I could go back in time, I’d hug my younger self and impart wisdom I ended up learning the hard way. Like to pre-preteen me, I’d assure her Dad’s alcoholism is not a reflection on her. She is a good daughter and no, he doesn’t love drinking more than he loves her. I’d warn her to brace herself, because it’ll only worsen as she grows up; and watching helplessly will hurt but it’s not her fault, nor her battle to fight.

I’d tell preteen me that though her best friend will soon get in with the popular crowd, it doesn’t mean she has to fight for her attention; that sometimes the people we love most can become toxic to us, and she mustn’t be afraid to let go.

I’d tell myself at 19 that she is stronger than she thinks, and to enjoy those friends she has while they’re still around. That if she feels them starting to drift away now, just wait. People grow apart, and sometimes no amount of friendly outreach can stop that. It doesn’t mean we’re undeserving of friends.

I’d tell mid-20s me not to let being single so long make her disregard her intuition with the opposite sex. To follow it when the narcissist comes calling, not ignoring all those blazing red flags. Don’t brush off that voice inside warning her he’s bad news. Dispense with the niceties and tell him to go ahead and go away, saving us a few months of insidious mind games.

But there’s no way to return to then and there, no time machine to take like a red-eye flight. That is my past, and I must stay in the here and now, with the future before me. All I can do is remind my current self of these things. When I look back on those moments (which should be seldomly), it needs to be with more love and understanding towards the me I used to be.

—  I’d like to speak likewise to others experiencing similar situations. Though you may feel like your world is crashing down around you, you’ll get through it, some way, somehow. Someday, you’ll stop losing sleep over it and breathe easier. You’ll survive, and more love is waiting on the other side

See tw’s

Your profile said
you liked to know a person’s boundaries
and then break them 

When you told me 
you wanted to meet and we 
had coffee at a closing creperie
upstairs in a desolate corner
where we could be seen by no one
and attempted to kiss me by grabbing my cheeks,

I should’ve known
you’d figure out my boundaries
sooner, not later

that they were more than hard limits:
no public; photography; no blood; no drugs. 
(Yes, I am a prude.) (Yes, poppers are a drug.)
Soft limits: no photography; no scat; 
tell me what you are going to do before you do that—
and only proceed if I consent.

When you texted me to text you a compliment, I should’ve known you’d turn
my soul’s only outlet into another tool for your domination,
that you’d usurp my means of communication/every hour
making me message you about how pretty you are.

When my words dried up, and I had no praise for you left,
my creativity spent, and you stopped texting me—
I should have known not to relent.
I should have known you’d wanted to abuse more than a writer’s flattery.

But when you texted me that you wanted to cut me up and eat me,
how should I have known to take your desires literally?
I thought your words were terrifying and blocked you,
deleted our message history, deactivated my profile

location settings unshared, read receipts disabled, 
because the monsters were out of the closet
and they were real, and I was scared. When I ghosted you,
I should have known you’d come back to haunt me

for I’d taken a screenshot of that monstrous text,
Disgusted (and perhaps intrigued) in case it would need 
to somehow be used someday as evidence: “exhibit A.”
Your number at the screenshot’s top, remained—

What a shrewd mistake:
though I tried to purge you from the recesses of my memory,
you were pushed to all my Apple devices simultaneously.
Nothing’s lost—in trauma, every detail’s ingrained.
What we try to forget gets archived, repressed, retained.  

So three weeks later when over-worked
abused via text by mum who’d gone berserk
I went searching again
for the cannibalistic man who said he’d only been joking

and found your number easily,
atop a screenshot sub-catalogued in my iCloud Photo Library
Texting you, “I’m back.” “Sorry I was such a scaredy cat.”
You replied, had I no sense of humor? 

The truth is: I don’t. In fact, of all the genres I especially disprove of, 
the top of my list are satire, farce, and improv.
I like to laugh, but only unironically. 
I should have known this was not a comedy. 

So later that night at your flat when you choked me
and bruised my throat making it impossible to speak
could you have known I’d go on the next day to enter
a queer, qualifying slam at the New York LGBT Center? 

Where I wondered to myself silently:
Why do all slam poems begin without poetry?
I did not know expression could feel like High School Forensics
You who begin the slam with what you call “sacrifice:”
What poets are not sacrificial?
When did poetry become a blood sport?
As you turn poet against poet, head-to-head,
I find you cheer for those you already know
and what sounds literal, anecdotal, superficial.
When through my poem whispered the prime-time “feature,”
he should have known it would cause me to forget my words,
like the sudden-onset of atheism upon a sidewalk preacher.

My voice—he did not know the pain, what ailed me:
psychic, neurotic—but also of: how
the night before, you’d assailed me
how you threatened to impale me with a samurai sword
you’d forged yourself while you punched me 
with my own fist, after which you asked me:

who knew where i was?
who had i told where I’d be going that night
how many friends knew i was there?
“3,” i lied/i told no one/because no one cared

Because I’m too sick/stupid/naive/death-seeking/
ashamed the only boys i meet 
are ones who must clobber me before they go to sleep

I should have known you’d try to take my voice
I should have known it was not a joke
I should have known life is not a boundary that can be broken

I should have known my wanting for my throat to be full
was a wish for words, for coherent speech:
to share, to touch—my soul’s outreach;
not for your cock, not for your fist,
I did not desire to be choked out—

but in the dizzying dizziness of trying to hold onto consciousness
wanting to vomit where there’s something that’s in it already
asphyxiating and not knowing who would save me
the words would come if I survived
and I would survive if my
words didn’t fail me;
and survive
I did.

Anne Carson wrote, “Shame lies upon the eyelid.”
We blind ourselves, so that we do not know
She was glossing poetic of how humanity’s Oedipal
We do not want to know, so we do not see
My eyes are open now, lids held
like the harum-scarum boys from Clockwork Orange, only it’s by myself

My neck still hurts, and lidocaine wash I hourly swish;
this thick solution: it’s a shrewd analgesic.
and it’s true, I will never return your copy of Slade House that you lent
or your daily texts, because my words for you’ve been spent.
But my voice, it’s full now, and it’s rising. 
When you tried to kill me, I should have known—
Your intent was always clear from your writing.

When I speak, it may be in a whisper,
it may not qualify me for your teams or your system,
but something’s afoot that’s of more consequence
than making people laugh at analogues and metonyms 
for my will’s been rising since and can’t be forgotten
these words are for me, i write this poem
to teach myself all these things I should have known.

KNOW@betterinthedarkblog​​ © 2017

Moon Magic

Wolf moon- January
Good luck, protection, meditation
Herbs: marjoram, holy thistle, nuts
Colors: white, blue, black
Stones: garnet, onyx, jet , chrysoprase

Ice moon-February
Peace, boundaries, blessing
Herbs: balm of glens, hyssop, myrrh, sage, spikenard
Colors: light blue, violet
Stones: amethyst, jasper, quartz crystal

Storm moon- March
Warding, freedom, ridding of bad luck
Herbs: broom, high john, yellow dock, wood Betony, Irish moss
Colors: green, red violet
Stones: aquamarine, bloodstone

Growing moon- April
New begging, love, blessing
Herbs: basil, chives, dragons blood, geranium, thistle
Colors: red, gold
Stones: ruby, garnet, sard

Hare moon- may
Cleaning, purification, prosperity
Herbs: dittany of Crete, elder, mint, rose, mugwort, thyme, yarrow
Colors: green, brown, pink
Stones: emerald, malachite, amber, carnelian

Mead moon- June
Survival, wisdom, love
Herbs: skullcap, meadowsweet, vervain, tansy, dog grass, parsley, mosses
Colors: orange, gold green
Stones:topaz, agate, alexandrite, fluorite

Hay moon- July
Peace, truth, justice
Herbs: honeysuckle, agrimony, lemon balm, hyssop
Colors: silver, blue grey
Stones: pearl, moonstone, agate

Corn moon- august
Protection, opportunity
Herbs: chamomile, st johnswort, bay, Angelica, fennel, rue, orange
Colors: yellow, gold
Stones: cats eye, carnelian, jasper, fire agate

Harvest moon- September
Harvest, divination
Herbs: Copal, fennel, rye, wheat, valerian, skullcap
Colors: brown, yellow green, yellow
Stones: periot, olivine, chrysolite, citrine

Blood moon -October
Purification, underworld
Herbs: pennyroyal, thyme, catnip, UVA ursi, Angelica, burdock
Colors: dark blue, green
Stones: opal, tourmaline, beryl, turquoise

Snow moon- November
Peace, happiness, skills
Herbs: grains of paradise, verbena, Betony, borage, cinquefoil, blessed thistle
Colors: grey, sea green
Stones: topaz, hyacinth, lapis lazuli

Cold moon- December
Success, prosperity, the fates
Herbs. Holly, ivy, fir, mistletoe
Colors: red, white, black
Stones: serpentine, jacinth, peridot

* New Moon Magic *

The new moon is for starting new ventures, new beginnings. Also love and romance, health or job hunting.
The energy of the dark moon is useful for working magick against attackers, and for understanding your own angers and passions. Also for rituals designed to bring justice to bear in very negative situations. Also use the new moon for love spells, job hunting, and healing.

* Waxing Moon Magic *

Use the waxing moon for constructive magick, such as llove spells, magic for wealth and success, courage, friendship, luck or good health.
* Full Moon Magic *

Prime time for rituals for prophecy, protection, divination. Any working that needs extra power, such as help finding a new job or healing for serious conditions, can be done now. Also for love, gaining sacred knowledge, legal matters, attracting money and prophetic dreams.

* Waning Moon Magic *

he waning moon is used for banishing magic, for ridding oneself of addictions, illness or negativity.

* Dark Moon Magic *

The dark moon is a time for ridding oneself of bad habits, Binding spells, for exploring our darkest recesses and understanding our angers and passions. Also it is a time of bringing justice.

-I learned this info from Conway and Cunningham.
12 Intriguing Facts About How The Human Brain Functions

Originally posted by ogicepun

Here’s a list of 12 golden nuggets of information about the human brain and how it functions. John Medina’s book Brain Rules gives incredible insight and intrigue on how our strongest survival organ operates and its uniqueness to each human body. Consider the wisdom below, survival tips for your brain!

Keep reading

Wisdom teeth
  • Dentist: okay we took out all your wisdom teeth, just be careful when you eat. You stick to just soft foods like mashed potatoes, scrambled eggs, puddings, applesauce, broth soup and that's it.
  • Me: *suddenly becomes hungry for hamburgers, chips, hot dogs, pizza, cookies...But can't and suffers for a week.*
  • 1 week later
  • Dentist: okay your stitches are out! Now it's alright for you to eat normally
  • Me: *immediately comes out of store with bags of chips, burgers, sodas, hot dogs as a tear falls down my cheek while I watch the sunset*
My Life Goals

Some are attainable, some aren’t. But, what’s wrong with dreaming?

1. Write and publish a novel/novella/book

I have those three listed because they’re all different and all have different levels of complexity to reach. For example, my mother thinks I should write a children’s book. But, I myself, want to write either a novella or a novel (preferably something super gay).

2. Teach!

I’ve always wanted to be a teacher, I don’t quite know why that profession has always interested me, but it has. And I plan on, one day, teaching people things about whatever I’m able to. Probably things relating to English, writing, or journalism. I don’t know, I have to get my major worked out first. But I definitely want teaching to be in my future at some point.

3. I want to move out of the United States

The United States…it’s interesting to say the least. But, personally, I’d love to live in Brighton, London, Italy, or France. Of course, two of those require me to learn a language that I’m not fluent in, but both French and Italian have always been a beautiful language that I’d love to learn! Plus, with my Italian heritage, I feel like it’s only appropriate to learn Italian and at least visit Italy.

4. Help the needy and the environment 

A rather weird one considering I can go ahead and do this today, which I am trying my best to do, but I want to do more. I don’t like the idea of there being families who can’t afford food, basic health care, clean water, a roof over their head, weather appropriate clothing, etc. I mean, I don’t think anyone likes that, but you know what I’m saying. I want to help them, and I want to help the world avoid putting people in situations such as that. I’m not sure how I can do so on a larger scale, but I’ll figure it out. This also goes for the environment. Especially the fucking cows and chickens. I’ll fight all of you because cows and chickens suffer and it hurts me. I love cows so much, good god. Chickens, too, but those fuckers used to chase me around on my grandparents farm and try to peck the back of my legs and that shit hurts. I still care about them, I just like cows more…

5. Marriage and kids?

I have a question mark at the end because I personally don’t mind being single. If I don’t get married, I don’t think it’d be the worst thing ever. But, I do want kids. I want at least one and I do plan on adopting them. I mean, there is the almost nonexistent chance of me falling for a dude and marrying them, but I still want to adopt. I’m also super down for marrying a wicked awesome chick and adopting a kid or three with them. 

6. Having a room dedicated to nerd things

This, my friends, will most likely be unattainable because of my salary unless I become a world renown best selling author. I want a room in my house to be filled with bookshelves that contain the numerous amount of books, nicknacks, and autographs I’ve collected over the years. I also want there to be a tv with all my gaming systems set up to it (I have quite a few: Xbox 360, Wii U, Nintendo Entertainment System, my computer, any other systems I purchase in the future), as well as a desk with a beautiful typewriter on it. 

7. Meeting and thanking you guys for all your support and love

You guys have supported me through everything and have always been there for me. I don’t know how I’d do it, welcoming this into the unattainable category, but I’d love to meet each and every one of you guys and give you hugs and thank you personally.

8. Die having made a difference

I don’t want to die without having made a difference in the world. As a final point, both figuratively and literally, I don’t want to go out forgotten. As most people do, which isn’t bad, I want to be remember by at least someone. Even if it’s being remembered by a person I smiled at while eating in a restaurant; someone I dropped a single in while walking the streets; a few of you guys who remember my blog; my brothers if they don’t die before me. I don’t see myself being remembered by the world, but just a person or two, that’d be nice. 

anonymous asked:

Ok but like.... why resist temptation? We would love to hear about the significance of frodo's name

Okay fine since you forced my hand.

So Frodo comes from the Old English Froda, which actually means “old,” but with the implication of “old and wise,” specifically with the wisdom that comes from hard experience. It also frequently carries with it the sense of suffering survived, and wisdom gained through that suffering.

It’s not a heroic name, in the traditional warrior-hero sense. It is a king’s name, but it’s the name of a king known for his wisdom, not his prowess in battle. (Actually, the mythical Froda, or one of them at least, was known for the peace of his reign and wasn’t a fighter at all.)

And that’s the thing about Frodo. His character is all about the wisdom that comes through experience and suffering, experience he never asked for but nevertheless took on voluntarily because someone had to do it. And he wanted to save the Shire and he did - at the cost of himself.

Mythically speaking, Frodo is the maimed king, the wounded healer. The Fisher King, if you will, but in reverse: it’s his wound that heals the land. (But not for him. Because as he tells Sam, that’s how it is, when things are in danger. Someone has to give them up, lose them, so that others can keep them.)

I think we often miss this final development of Frodo’s character as a wisdom figure, in part because people can get so focused on the fact that he failed his quest (which he did), and in part because, tbqh, the movies really did him an injustice in this area.

One of my fave scenes in the book is that final confrontation between Frodo and Saruman, when Frodo stops the other hobbits from killing Sharkey, and Saruman says with a furious snarl, “You’ve grown, halfling.” Grown wise, and in Saruman’s opinion cruel, because he’s fallen so far that he can only see mercy as a cruelty. And Saruman mocks Frodo, saying that his wisdom has been bought at a terrible price, that he’ll never be able to live in this Middle-earth again, and…he’s not wrong.

When the hobbits return to the Shire, Sam, Merry, and Pippin all say that it feels like waking up from a strange dream. But Frodo says, “Not for me. For me it feels like falling asleep again.” He has, to put it bluntly, seen too much of the underlying reality of the world, and he can’t go back.

Merry tells Pippin in the Houses of Healing that it’s not possible for Hobbits to live too long on the heights. They must come back to good earth and pipeweed and the simple pleasures of life in order to remain Hobbits.

But Frodo has spent too long on the heights. He has experienced and suffered too much, and the wisdom he’s gained has fundamentally changed him.

And all of that is contained in his name. Froda carries a sense of wisdom, but it’s a wisdom that only comes at the cost of suffering. There’s an inherent melancholy in the name that fits the character perfectly.

The Buddha said, ‘Nothing can survive without food.’ This is a very simple and very deep truth. Love and hate are both living phenomena. If we do not nourish our love, it will die and may turn into hate. If we want love to last, we have to nurture it and give it food every day. Hate is the same; if we don’t feed it, it cannot survive.
—  Thich Nhat Hanh
BTS Reaction | When their S/O loses their voice

| bts react when their s/o was caught really bad cold and lost their voice for a few days | this is me rn I survived getting my wisdom teeth out only to get a fucking cOLD FMLLLL ~Admin H who is dying rn save me 

Jin/Seokjin: Mother Mode On™ he’s gonna do everything in his power to return you to full health he’s gonna wrap you up in 2000000 blankets and not let you move he’s gonna make you soup and just if ur ever sick call jin bc he’s the perfect person to have on hand when ur sick and especially if you lose ur voice he’s gonna get a notepad and demand u not say a word until ur throat is completely better

Suga/Yoongi: poor darling isn’t super the best at handling these kinds of situations he’s more of the behind the scenes taking care of kind of person if that makes sense?? like he’s the person who if you leave ur keys on the table all the time he’ll slip them into your pocket so if you’re sick he’ll try his best to take care of you even if he isn’t the best he’s trying his best and nobody can fault him for that <3 he’s another person that will go the notepad route for when you lose your voice.

J-Hope/Hoseok: honey pie h a t es it when ur sick!! when you feel bad he feels bad bc ur his sunshine his inspiration his everything and when you’re in bed w a fever he hate hate hates ittttt!!! he’s actually low key overwhelming and smothering w his attention but i mean who doesn’t like to be comforted and spoiled when they’re sick?? he absolutely extra despises it when you lose your beautiful voice bc to him theres no sound more amazing and lovely so he’ll send u cute flirty texts 

Rap Monster/Namjoon: leader babe is such a hardworker and he does take good care of the rest of BTS for sure that he knows how to take care of someone when they’re sick, but we all know his poor curse of breaking things and being so accident-prone so he did boil over the soup he tried to make and he did break the bowl he make oatmeal in and then he put too much water in the oatmeal and then he almost blew up the kettle trying to make tea and ur apartment is a wreck bUT ITS THE THOUGHT THAT COUNTS OKAY AND HE SENDS U CUTE LIL TEXTS WHEN HE HAS TO LEAVE AND WHEN U LOSE UR VOICE HE STILL SENDS U TEXTS EVEN IF HE’S SITTING NEXT 2 YOU

Taehyung/V: okay so im fully convinced that next to Jin taehyung is the best person to take care of u when ur sick bc he would make a hella good husband he’s v v attentive to you when ur sick but not as overbearing as hobi but he’s gonna get u a little whiteboard to draw on and get you a coloring book that you guys color in and giggle over while you wait out your illness and he always decorates ur whiteboard w cute magnets 

Jimin: awww okay he’s gonna be so cute he’s gonna make u a whole nest of fuzzy blankets and make u tea and get ur favorite take out and make sure u have lotion tissues and just try his best to stay with you and he’ll use a sketching pad to draw cute lil sketches of you and of BTS and u guys will watch rom coms and giggle and try ur best to communicate without you having a voice :(

Jungkook: honestly he might be panicking inside bc he has no idea how to help u and he hates feeling helpless in these kinds of scenarios but tbh his method of getting u to feel better is he makes u a huge pillow fort and fills it with blankets and makes u guys hot chocolate out of the packets and he runs down and buys you guys some spicy ramen and its not the healthiest meal but it clears out your nose lmao and he teases u over ur squeaky voice until you lose ur voice entirely then he buys u a cute notepad and decorates each page w a goofy drawing of his members