how to carry your dragoon (who will eventually just accept it and let you do so)
I drew this before 3.3 because I was fully convinced we were never going to get aymeric carrying estinien in canon yet here we are, canon happened, the thing happened (this picture set was also @hyth-ffxiv‘s idea blame them)
aymeric is very strong. very strong arms. I approve greatly.
Does anyone else ever have the experience where your daydreams are, like…… off if you’re not in the right place? For me, my daydreams are always the best and most enthralling when I’m at home. When I’m at my dorm, though, they almost feel wrong. I don’t even know if I’m making any sense I need to go to sleep now omg
They warned me about Harry. How he was magnetic, how you wouldn’t know how he had you wrapped around his finger until it was much too late. Much like how the moon pulled the ocean, he pulled you right to him.
I was warned and I proceeded without caution.
And now it was too late.
I watched him roll out of my bed, running a hand through his hair before stretching. His back muscles rippled and I noticed the scratch marks etched into his skin by my own nails the night before. He turned towards me as he pulled on his jeans and when he saw I was awake he offered me a small smile. “Sorry, love. Did I wake you?”
“Were you going to leave without saying goodbye?”
“Thought you deserved to sleep in, I know you haven’t had a proper night’s sleep in a while.”
That was true, but what Harry didn’t know was that I was having trouble sleeping because he wasn’t in bed beside me. “I didn’t know you’d be leaving so early.”
a/n: inspired by the anime 'orange’ which made me cry like a little bum. ALSO! make sure you look at the dates to not confuse yourself in each transition. it’s ordered in dd/mm/yy and the italics are what’s written in the letters. this took me awhile to write, but it’s finally here- so please enjoy ok goodbye.
summary: a story about someone who receives letters from themselves ten years in the future and asks them to fix all their regrets and save a particular boy.
“Hold him and love him. Tell him how you feel. Tell him how much he means to you. And whatever you do, never let go of him.”
Life was never how you would plan it and you knew exactly that.
They say that life is unbearable if you make it unbearable- and as half of that statement is true, half of that statement is life on its own having a way of unravelling itself before you. As if it were knots to seams to threads- life had untied itself in an inevitable way, you could no longer complain anymore.
In his fight with Juuzou, he starts out sort of moving around menacingly, but Juuzou gets several knives into him with almost no effort at all. And then he says:
Uta’s reply is:
To become Shinohara.
Now, the first time we saw Uta do this, he turned into Arima, and it honestly seemed like a more amateur attempt. I vaguely remember someone being a dick to me because I said that Uta was able to use kagune to make Arima’s face, and the going theory at the time was that it was some kind of mask. I feel a little vindicated now, but I digress. The point is, when Uta created Arima’s face, it was messy.
But when he became Shinohara it was instantaneous, and complete:
He has the right bone structure, the right body shape (though he is still smaller than Shinohara), and the right mannerisms. Clearly, he’s been practicing, and I think it’s reasonable to assume that this ability is one that he has perfected in the time since the auction.
But, how did he know? How did he know to become Shinohara, of all people? And how did he know how to act like Shinohara?
It seems to me that Furuta planned all of this, planned on Juuzou confronting Uta, and fed Uta information that would help him to ultimately overcome Juuzou. As far as we can see this didn’t work - Juuzou’s squad was there for him in a touching display of love and loyalty, which made me cry……BUT anyway, I am not so sure that this battle is over. The last image we saw of Uta was this:
And we well know at this point that a slice through the head isn’t enough to kill old Uta. Yet he’s completely absent for the rest of the scene, and no one seems to be paying attention.
Additionally, the Suzuya Squad points out something that is very important.
There are two psychological aspects to this fight beyond the Juuzou/Shinohara bond. One being that the large number of clowns has the effect of making the enemy seem much larger than they actually are, and the other being that killing humans will cause tremendous guilt among the agents. Additionally, if they are trying to avoid killing humans, then they will inevitably miss some of the real clowns who are attacking.
This mix of strategy, psychological warfare and physical warfare is just as brilliant as it is terrifying…and it seems that only Suzuya’s Squad has figured the bulk of it out.
To those of you who reached out to me, thank you ❤️ It means the world to me, your support and kindness!
I just want to let you all know not to worry about me. It helps for me to write it down and publish it, it makes the pressure less, if that makes sense. I often feel like I’m about to choke on all these feelings and thoughts, and getting it out makes me breathe easier. I have limited places to do so; I don’t want to post on my FB or IG because I don’t want my family or friends to be burdened by this (okay that makes it sound like I’m ok with you guys getting the load, I’m not, it just feels different? I feel like I can be more myself here, that I don’t have to wear the mask, that I can be honest and it’s ok). Here I know people will understand the need to vent and that these feelings and thoughts aren’t necessarily something that I will act on, but it is in my head and I need to get it out or else it gets too big and all-consuming. I really don’t want to die. I’m just really struggling to see the point of living. And I need to be able to say that somewhere without people freaking out, and I can do that here. I appreciate that so much! I don’t have words to describe the relief in knowing I have this place as an outlet. So I just really need you all to know that when I share those things, you don’t need to worry that that is the last you see from me. I’m way too stubborn to give in!
Fics so good I read them in one sitting, bc who needs sleep.
Give Me Truths - ‘Just like a little cat,’ Louis thought later, as he drifted off to sleep. 'A little kitten with his claws sunk right into me.’ It isn’t that terrible of a thought, after all. …………. Louis is a psychology student with a tattoo count as high as his genius IQ. Harry is in a (sort-of) relationship with a homophobic man and hates himself a little more every day. Things fall apart and Louis puts him back together.Or, the one in which Louis falls in love with a fragile boy and tells him every beautiful truth in the world, as long as it makes him happy. (chaptered, complete, 110k, painful but also so cute)
Darkness - Innocent, wealthy, and sheltered Louis Tomlinson arrives to London for a new life and in hope of adventure but instead he meets local badboy Harry Styles. Louis has no idea who Harry really is or what he’s capable of but once he finds out that his angel is no angel at all it’s a bit too late because Louis has already fallen. But will Harry’s Darkness consume him completely? Based on the youtube video Dark. (chaptered, complete, 116k)
But Please, Don’t Bite - “Melodic little jingle sounded from a bell hanging over the doorframe and warm indoor air curled heavily around his shivering body for the first time in months. Harry suddenly felt a sting in the corners of his eyes and had to force down a broken sob. Fuck, he was a mess. Such a mess. He had to focus.” (chaptered, complete, 122k, not sure if it made me cry or smile more)
Loved You First - Harry has lived his life ruled by anxiety, bullied by overbearing work-mates and ridiculed for his geeky look. When a new boss starts Harry can barely look him in the eye but Louis appears to be on his side. Soon Harry develops feelings for the protective and supportive Louis but Louis tries to fight it at first. There’s rumours about Louis at his last work place and his penchant for his secretaries so Harry has a right to feel insecure. Harry slowly lets his curls break free as Louis thaws him and they embark on a new beginning together. Featuring Harry styled as Marcel, Niall as Louis’ best friend and Zayn as Harry’s gay mentor. (chaptered, complete, 100k, everything by this author is honestly a blessing)
Run Like the Devil - Harry stops pouting, but his frown is still fixed in place. “Are you sure?” he asks. “You know it’s your soul you’re signing away.” He sounds…sad? No, that’s not right, but there’s something. Christ. This is the most incompetent demon Louis’ ever met. If he hadn’t seen the red of his eyes he wouldn’t believe he was a demon at all. How’d he get this job if he isn’t trying to convince Louis to deal? Or is it just another trick? A ploy for sympathy?“I’m sure,” Louis says. “Come over here and kiss me.” *Supernatural AU. Louis hunts demons; Harry’s the strangest demon he’s ever met, and he keeps fucking meeting him. (chaptered, complete, 138k, has a short sequel, this fic physically hurt me but it was worth it)
Swim In The Smoke - “What about this, Captain?” Liam asks, nudging the boy kneeling between their feet with the toe of his boot. The boy hisses and swipes at him, slurring out something unintelligible around the makeshift gag Niall had to stuff in his mouth. He misses by a mile and tries again, just as ineffectively. Harry looks down at him, at the way the sun streams over his face and shoulders, at the way the gag stretches his mouth, lips pink and chapped. He’s lithe and pretty, smudged all over with dirt. They had found him tied up below deck, mostly unconscious, next to a barrel full of gold. He’s clearly a prisoner, but there’s something familiar about him, something that niggles at Harry’s brain. Something he can’t quite put his finger on. “Put him in my cabin,” Harry decides, turning back to deal with the rest of the loot. The boys screams out jumbled curse words at Harry’s back, muffled by the gag, and Harry can’t understand any of it. (chaptered, complete, 101k, I wasn’t sure about this fic at first but it’s so worth it if you read all of the way through)
I Can Feel the Draw - Louis, not having pulled a job in a while, is convinced to help con millionaire art collector Harry Styles. To do so, Louis has to keep Harry safe. It should be easy, but Louis finds himself possibly falling in love with him, which compromises himself and the others. (chaptered, complete, 113k, part of a series, the ending made me sad but I still loved it)
Okay. How about this? List all of these and why. Favorite WA kiss? Favorite WA angst? Favorite WA love declaration? Favorite funny WA scene? Favorite Barry moment? Favorite Iris moment? Favorite WA moment in general?
1) Favorite WA kiss: Other than the hot make-out in episode 4, I would have to say my favorite kiss between them happens in episode 9 of season 3, because Barry just gifted Iris with their amazing loft and he was so excited to show her. After that, Barry tells her that moving in together isn’t a big step for him (because really, it’s not – Barry has waxed poetic to Iris multiple times, and done things like get her a replica of her mother’s ring). He was ready to move forward with her, to take the next step in their future together. The moment was just so sweet, also because he basically proposed to her when he told her that she was the last thing he wanted to see when he went to bed, and the first thing he wanted to see when he woke up (before Iris cut him off with a kiss lol). I know they had two kisses in the scene, but I’m mainly talking about after Iris said she loved him (and SHE USED FULL NAME WHICH KILLED ME) and Barry told her he loved her too. That moment was so sweet and genuine, and that scene alone showcases how much they love each other. Both kisses had me shook, though!
2) Favorite WA angst: Hands down, and I think my favorite scene of all time in season one, was the scene from Grodd Lives 1x21, where Joe was kidnapped by Grodd and Iris questioned why the team couldn’t figure out how to save him. The angst aspect was when she walked out, and Barry followed her. I loved their argument in that scene in the hallway, mainly because Iris got to express how she felt about Barry lying, which we all needed to hear since she were kept in the dark for pretty much the whole season. It’s also my favorite because Iris was tearing up, because she was truly hurt that her dad and mainly Barry would lie to her, because “you were supposed to be my best friend, Barry!” That line.. shook! “I am your best friend!” I literally know the entire dialogue in that scene, lol. It was just heart breaking because Iris was truly hurt, because she gave Barry that much capacity to hurt her, because she loved him. Also, I will never not laugh (and roll my eyes) at Barry equating keeping the secret from Iris to her hidden feelings for him. Not only that, but the acting from both of the actors, specifically from Candice was A1. Definitely my favorite scene from season 1.
3) Favorite WA love declaration: This is so hard to choose! I feel like moments that can’t be considered love declarations, are in my opinion. I’ll keep this one short, but I guess I will go with Barry’s first confession in 1x09. I think it was so sweet and raw from Barry, and it’s been the most open he’s been to everyone. He wore his heart on his sleeve, and he felt like how owed it to Iris to tel her then – although it was ill-timing. The part that made me choose this declaration was because of Barry’s “I loved you before I even knew what the word love meant.” That line did it for me because Barry defines love int he way he loves Iris. When you’re young, you don’t really know what love is. You know it’s characterized my some feeling, but Barry as a child knew whatever he felt for her, must be love. He essentially said, “that, that right there, whatever I feel for her, it has to be love.” And that makes me cry. Of course Iris’s silent tears added tot he scene, because you could tell she were mad and sad, because it’s like “Why now?” in her mind, everything has completely changed for them. She’s always seen Barry as her best friend, and probably couldn’t differentiate her romantic feelings for him vs her platonic ones, so she buried them – and characterized them as one. Now, that Barry told her he loved her this entire time, you have to imagine in her head she’s thinking about and questioning every single moment they have shared, because for her it’s always been one thing. Now that Barry told her this, she knows that in every moment they have shared, he’s been in love with her. I lied, that wasn’t short at all lol!
4) Favorite Funny Scene: Have WA had many funny scenes? Lol. I don’t know if this scene be classified as funny, but the first scene that popped into my head was in episode 3x09, when Barry just showed Iris their soon-to-be lovely home together, and Iris said “I got you a wallet.” LOL. That line made me alight and cry, because Iris was so genuine and sweet and she’s in shock that he gave her that, while she gave him a wallet. And Barry’s “I’m sure I love it” made me CRY (but also laugh while crying) because HE WAS DEAD ASS SERIOUS. Barry is going to cherish that wallet for everything it’s worth, simply because Iris got it for him lol. I’m sure he tells everyone t work that Iris gave him that wallet, just to show it off. This scene also solidified that Barry is the better gift giver :)
5) Favorite Barry moment: If this is speaking about them individually, this is tough, because there are so many Barry scenes to choose from, lol. I don’t know if this classifies as “favorite Barry moment” because it’s his tears and his conversation with Nora in Welcome to Earth 2 on the phone that made me cry. It was the first time Barry heard Nora’s voice since he were a child. Technically it’s not his mother, but Earth 2 Barry’s but it was still all the same for Barry. The moment he heard her voice on the phone, and had to play off as E2 Barry and started to cry (which makes it even more sad? Because E2 Barry still has his mother). It was just a heart breaking scene, and well-acted one all around. Kudos to Grant.
6) Favorite Iris Moment: This is difficult as well, but not as difficult because Iris has had so many wonderful scenes that made me cheer for her. I loved the scene where she’s talking to Joe in Grodd Lives in CCPN, because she was again, expressing her POV which was lacked in season 1 due to her being in the dark about Barry’s secret. My favorite moment so far though, is in 3x11 where she has the conversation with Wally in CCPD. She had so much agency in that episode, but in that scene alone because she wanted to mattered. She got to express her fear of dying, but also getting to do something about it because she got to be. She knew about her potential fate, so she took matters into her own hands and didn’t let her consume her (at that moment). She wanted to be more than just a daughter, or sister, or a girl friend. The dialogue in that scene was A1, and really shows what kind of person Iris is. She loves being all of those things, but it doesn’t always define her. Her compassion, her need for justice and truth is what’s also important, her job as a reporter! I cried and cheered for her so much in that scene and the entire episode (like I always do).
7) All of my favorite WA moments are here, although they aren’t that updated. I want to add the scene from 3x10, where Barry tells Iris about her potential fate int he time vault. 1) the acting was so good? Grant and Candice play really well off of each other, but I felt like this particular scene had a much bigger impact because of the context and the emotions. 2) Poor Iris! Her whole life has been turned upside down, and she was so selfless to the point where her first thought was to tell Barry to stop letting criminals go to save her, and to protect Joe after. I loved Barry’s anger in that scene as well because he felt like Iris gave up a bit when she asked when it would happen. For him, it’s like Savitar already won. The entire scene just had me in shambles.
Who’s ready for more married, modern feysand? This time featuring their first bad fight, and their making up (fluff galore) after it.
This is the fic that I promised something like…three weeks ago. …about that. I had a lot more trouble then I expected writing this. This story has gone through like thirty revisions to the plot, and I’m still a bit unsure about the ending part. It’s my first time writing like that, and I didn’t want to go too far in detail on my first try at writing like that, so it may be a bit…awkward? I mean, I hope it’s not, and it may just feel that way to me because I wrote it and I’m nervous about posting it, but please let me know what you guys honestly think. This is a new challenge for me, and I want to improve so I can work towards being a well-rounded writer. (And if the smut part is awkward, feel free to just skip back up to the fluffy part and pretend it ends there ;) )
The wind was icy, but I didn’t feel it. I should have been concerned, walking around in a tank top and shorts with snow on the ground. Rhys would have been concerned, but he was too angry to be concerned.
Usually, he would have forced a jacket on me on my way out the door, even if I was already wearing a sweater. He was a worrier.
But today everything was different. Everything was wrong.
So I stood on my sister’s front steps, the snow swirling against my bare legs and the wind slicing at my shoulders. But I was angry too, and that kept me warm.
sometimes i just think about how alone isak was in s1 and s2? he broke up two of his best friends because he couldn’t confront his own feelings - or had confronted them and was too scared of what he found. his best friend, his main source of support, was the very person he couldn’t get support from. and that must’ve been horrible for a teenage boy trying to figure himself out. but in s3 skam gifted us with isak expanding his friend group, and i’m s o proud:
mahdi didn’t really have a role other than fun weed bro at the beginning of s3, but he was immediately supportive of isak’s coming out! he even brought up pansexuality, which helped diffuse the tensionand educate them all. here was isak with his “maybe i’m a little gay” and mahdi jumps in with yeah there are more sexualities and that’s cool and it just?? reminds everyone that heterosexuality doesn’t have to be the default.
magnus started out as kind of annoying and tone-deaf (tbh i def see him as the vilde of the boys), but then he encourages isak to reach out to even, in the best way possible, without lecturing him or making it into a Lesson. after a weekend of research into bipolar disorder, he needed someone with actual experience with it to put it into simple terms, to remind isak that what he said to even in the kitchen was right. only even can feel what he feels, and isak should actually talk to him instead of believing his ex because…WOW….wow
and JONAS. that coming out scene almost made me cry, because sure, isak has moved on, but he’s always looked up to jonas, they’ve been best friends for so long. if he didn’t get jonas’s support, he’d be crushed. at this point, i’m sure jonas starts to have his suspicions about isak’s old crush on him, but you know what?? he doesn’t do shit about it. because it’s over, it’s done, and sometimes being Bros means one bro might like-like another bro. and that’s okay! traditional standards of masculinity are a prison anyway.
and the Boys are so supportive of even. there’s no awkwardness of like “haha how do we interact with our friend’s boyfriend is he our bro too” nah it’s chill. i’ll never forget when even gives magnus love advice and the guys are like “….you know i never thought of that but you may be right.” and it works!! give me more of even coaching magnus through his relationship with vilde. jonas and mahdi need way less help than magnus, but sometimes they probably text even too like how did you get up the courage to talk to someone you really like but has never noticed you before.
the answer is that you lowkey follow them around everywhere and steal away their basic right to dry their hands after using the restroom which maybe isn’t the most helpful advice but it sure worked.
basically this friend group is pure as heck and i’m so blessed that this show doesn’t need to fuel unnecessary drama. i’m glad that we’re allowed to like these characters, no matter how flawed they are.
Reading about Lauren yesterday was certainly something that stunned me. Not because we were close (sadly, we weren’t - though I wish I had taken more time to get to know her more than just through her posts.). We had very briefly messaged and commented on posts, but that’s about it. Important note: she told me that given my history, I could claim to be a bigger Joe Biden fan than she was. BUT, she insisted that if Joe needed a BFF that it would certainly be her and not me. How could I argue with that?
But her passing really ripped me up inside because of the pure joy she seemed to have at times for life. Watching (through their posts) her relationship with Daniel grow over the years was truly beautiful. It was the loss of that love that really ripped my heart apart. Watching the video Daniel posted made me cry - as I’m sure it had that impact on many. How can your heart not break for him and their closest friends? How can your heart not sink when you see something so beautiful between two people end so unexpectedly?
I’m thankful that I’ve been able to follow their adventures online. I hate that we weren’t able to meet. I have no doubts that she and Brad have reunited and are talking about the most inappropriate things.
Like I said before, I hope Daniel and all who knew Lauren find comfort in knowing that she brought joy to so many people. That joy and her friendships are not things that fade away, rather they become part of the people they touch. The truly beautiful people are able to share their beauty with others to make their lives better and make them better people. Lauren’s beauty will be forever alive with all whom she touched. I’m very thankful to have had a small window to watch a personality that seemed to be larger than life unfold.