also the other day i read meta that said we should be grateful for the “”“positive”“” queer “”“representation”“” on spn because we should keep in mind that queer people are not spn’s target demographic

to which i say

fuck you

queer people are nerds too

be ashamed for trying to contextualize and define sci-fi/horror geek/nerd-dom as cishet and white. 

especially since those genres–horror especially–are known for propagating, building up, and perpetuating systems of oppression. 

people would rather give spn hypothetical cookies for not “being as bad as it could be”

would rather try to justify their favorites because they don’t want to straight up admit that spn canon is problematic as they try to make spn’s grossness more palatable with the excuse of “well you’re not their target demographic so”

well isn’t that the fucking problem???


“Imagine skyping with Dean because you weren’t able to go on a particularly long hunt.”

Dean sat staring at the computer waiting impatiently for it to load. If it hadn’t been for the fact that he hadn’t touched or even seen you in two weeks, he wouldn’t be doing this. You suggested that the two of you try skyping. You may not be able to touch each other, but seeing each other was better than nothing. 

Dean wasn’t very good with technology. You had witnessed, on more than one occasion, Dean get frustrated with technology and walk away pissed off. 

You were hoping tonight would go a little differently, though you tried not to get your hopes up. Hopefully the boys would be home within the week. Then you would have access to the real deal. For now, skype would have to do as long as Dean could figure it out.

You had enlisted Sam’s help in getting Dean set up. You practically had to beg him. He told you he didn’t want to contribute to whatever the hell you two were going to be doing via skype. That had made you laugh, and you told him he better help or Dean’s mood would only go downhill. He knew you were right, so he had relented. 

You saw Dean’s username pop up as logged in. You immediately hit the call button. You listened to the computer ring.

Finally, Dean answered, the look on his face was enough to make you laugh. His brows were knit together. He was clearly already fed up with the computer and you hadn’t even gotten to talk to him yet.

“What the hell?” he said looking at the computer screen. 

“Dean?” you asked, trying to get his attention. 

“Y/N? Is that you?”

You laughed. “Can you not see me?” you asked as you watched Dean’s eyes dart back and forth over the screen. 

Finally, a smile crossed his face and he said, “Hello, beautiful.”

You smiled, your eyes bright. “Hey, babe.” You sighed. Just seeing Dean did wonders for your mood. Sure, Cas had popped in occasionally to let you know what was going on, and that they were all okay, but it wasn’t the same as seeing it for yourself. “Hurry up and get your ass home. I’m tired of sleeping alone.”

You watched as Dean smirked.You knew what was going through his mind. “That is the understatement of the day, sweetheart. I’m not finding sleeping alone to be a picnic either. I hate waking up without you snuggled up next to me or being able to wrap my arms around you,” he admitted. Even though he hated to admit it, he loved that you snuggled when you slept. It gave him a sense that he was protecting you. The you burrowed into his chest when you fell asleep, or the way he wrapped his arms tightly around your waist in the morning was perfect.

“Dean,” you sighed. Just seeing him and hearing his voice was creating a longing in you. 

Dean detected the want in your voice. “Don’t say my name like that, baby. We can’t do anything about that as far apart as we are.” You saw him shift uncomfortably in his chair, adjusting himself.

You gave him a devilish grin. “Is Sammy there with you?” you asked. 

Dean cocked his eyebrow as he tried to figure out what you were up to. “No, he said he didn’t want any part of this conversation. I think he went to the bar.”

All you needed was confirmation that Dean was alone. You took off your shirt. You were wearing Dean’s favorite black lace bra. You watched Dean as he took a deep breath. 

“Oh God,” he managed.

“You like that?” you asked reaching back behind to unhook your bra. “If so, you’ll like this even better.” You got the last hook undone and let the bra fall from your chest. It was rising and falling quickly. 

“You’re gorgeous, Y/N. Even on a computer screen,” he said as he lifted his shirt off. His bare chest was toned and tan. You wanted to reach through the screen and run your hand across it. 

“Damn it, Dean,” you moaned as you began to touch yourself, running your hands over your breast and playing with your nipples. “I really wish you were here,” you said with want breathing heavily. Your hand moved to your lower body and cupped your heat. You were already wet.

You looked at Dean and you could see that he had his cock in hand, and you had a full view of him. He was slowly stroking himself as he watched you. “Y/N, just you wait until I get my hands on you when I get home,” he said pumping more quickly. “The things I’m going to do to you,” he said breathing heavily.

“I wish it was my mouth around you,” you said as you continued to pleasure yourself.

“If only dreams did come true,” Dean said with a moan. You could tell he was getting close. Just watching him was enough to make the coil in your stomach wind more tightly. You began to feel the heat rising in your body. By this time, you were bucking against your hand chasing your release, moaning Dean’s name. “You close baby?” he asked.

“Yes,” you cried. “Oh Dean,” you said with such passion that your orgasm washed over you. You could hear Dean utter your name as he grunted through his own climax. Eventually all that could be heard between you was the sound of heavy breathing. Finally you were able to speak. “Well, that was something new,” you said with a smile.

“Definitely something we are going to have to do more often when we are apart,” he said with a satisfied smile. 

“I’m not going to let you out of my site for a long time when I get my hands on you, Winchester. I need you. This was nice, but nothing compares to what your hands and body are capable of doing to me,” you sighed as you looked at him on the screen. 

“Just you wait,” he said smiling. “After that, I might just have to leave Sammy to wrap this up. I need you.”

You laughed. You wanted him to come home so badly, but you also didn’t want him to abandon Sam. “Don’t do that, Dean. You’ll be done soon. If not, I”m coming to you. I seem to be over whatever it was I had. I’ve felt better these last few days,” you said assured him. 

“If I’m not done in here in the next two days, you are coming,” he said. 

You smirked at him and raised your eyebrows suggestively. “I’ll come for you any day, Winchester.”

He laughed out loud. It was a hearty laugh. It was enough to turn you on again. You may just have to leave and head his way right now. In fact, you made up your mind. “I’ve gotta go, Dean,” you said abruptly. The look on his face was almost enough to make you reveal your surprise.

“I love you,” he said.

“I love you. See you soon sweetheart,” you said. He ended the call and you rushed to your room to pack. You wanted to get to Dean tonight. You were determined to extend that moment of bliss you had just had with him. Oh to have Dean’s hands on you tonight after two weeks without. The thought was enough to send a shiver throughout your body. You picked up the pace as you continued to pack. 

Maybe It’s Maybelline

In which Castiel’s hair has a personality of its own.

July 8 | Cas Appreciation Week | Favorite Physical Feature | Hair


Castiel was a capable of a lot of things. He was a whole galaxy crammed into one small human for Christ’s sake. He could set things aflame with a well placed glare if he wished. Even so, there was one thing Castiel couldn’t seem to do, and that was tame the dark locks that curled at the nape of his neck and constantly stuck up in any direction it pleased.

Most of the time the boys joked that it had a personality of its own.

It was at times windblown, touched by the air of twelve different countries in a second.

It was at a time covered in raining sparks from the lights of a barn. Is that not how humans normally introduce themselves?

It was at times matted, the dark locks clinging together with demon blood and dirt. As a human, he scrubbed away the muck with shampoo that smelled of citrus. As an angel, he willed the muck away, having his hair cleaned in the blink of an eye.

It was at a time drenched in sweat as Castiel felt his stolen grace wither away along with his longing heart.

In another time, it was cloaked in the scent of marijuana. Eh, it’s the end of the world.

It was at a time wet, drenched in the waters of a river that Emmanuel didn’t remember ever jumping into.

It was at times singed, little pieces shorter than they once were because of the flames of Hell.

It was at a time longer, paired with peach fuzz that was apparently nice. There really wasn’t time for haircuts in purgatory.

It was at times tousled, misplaced by his own fingers as he ran them through it during a long night of research for a hunt he was determined to do correctly.

It was at a time sticky. One doesn’t collect honey without getting at least some of it on themselves.

It was at times semi-clean, washed with the water from a sink of the Gas-N-Sip. Hygiene was something humans needed when they worked an important job such as his.

It was at a time on Chuck’s floor, remains of a battle Castiel would never have won, but would still, no matter what, have fought.

It was at a time dyed with his own blood, placed there by the hands of his dearest friend. No…placed there by the Mark Of Cain.

It was now bedhead every morning, or so Castiel was told by the brothers. They rated it every morning with teasing smiles as Cas grumpily poured his coffee. “What do you think, Dean? I’m giving it a seven.” “Hmm, you know what, Sammy? I’m saying seven and a half.”

oh so there’s a new woman on supernatural

swear to fucking god fandom

put your actions where your goddamn mouth is

you say we’re all family

(so fucking treat us like a family)

  • you don’t want Amelia to be Sam’s love interest?

too fucking bad

because you know who falls in love? people fall in love

  • you don’t think that romance should be part of the show?

too fucking bad. romance has always been part of this show. romance is the foundation this show is based on and if you don’t believe me

say it with me now

  • mary and john 
  • sam and jessica
  • sam and ruby
  • sam and madison
  • bobby and karen
  • bobby and professor visyak
  • dean and cassie
  • dean and lisa

romance has been part of the show since the goddamn pilot. stop using the ew! romance! goat bleat to thinly veil your undisguised misogyny. 

you know what else is part of being a family? romance. stop perpetuating for the sexless/loveless mother trope that kripke has force-fed down our throat. 

stop calling her a slut or a bitch because she’s fallen in love with sam and presumably likes to have sex with him. don’t fucking slur her for being a goddamn individual with her own agency and her own desires and her own wants because she’s not living up to some fucked up world view of oppression.

but what if the presentation isn’t like that, you say, what if the way she’s written is ~horrible~


if a narrative is treating someone bad–or you fucking think that she’s gonna get the shaft

THEN TAKE THESE PEOPLE’S SIDES–not the narrative’s! not the writer’s!

don’t fucking slur her

don’t fucking hope she’s gonna die


you sick fucks

supernatural has a long and bloody and gross history of (violently) disposing of people who don’t fit their privileged ideal.

let’s not encourage the pattern to continue, shall we?

don’t think i haven’t noticed how people mysteriously use the word “they” when referring to the episode on friday:

what are they doing to cas! what are the writers thinking

so no more Edlund is our king, eh? No more, only Edlund is allowed to write Castiel, eh?

but when Gamble was writing for Castiel (and she did a damn good Castiel), it was nothing but slurs and explicit naming so that everyone knew WHICH WRITER IN PARTICULAR you were upset with. 

i see, fandom.

i see.

(swear to fucking god if there are no gifsets going around with people in danger/dying, ala the GOT/Firefly gifsets i see floating around, with Ben Edlund’s name plastered over the perpetuator of genuine and emotional pain

i will

not be surprised

but i might flip tables

Dear Misha Collins Anon

[Since we’re talking about SPN stars being oblivious to privilege, what are your thoughts on Misha? I read in your tags that you have issues with him, and I was wondering what they are. Based on his education/being married to a feminist, I would expect that he’s not AS oblivious as J2. On the other hand, the whole concept of Random Acts seems like it would come from someone who doesn’t understand structural inequality.]

Oh boy, why do I get the feeling that I am going to regret answering this. 


I’ve heard a lot of good things about Misha Collins (con reports, his forward about Art in the GISHWES book, how talented/intelligent he is, etc.) – and I’ve heard a lot of bad things (rape joke–i heard he hadn’t intended it to be a rape joke from a posted explanation on his twitter, but the fact is the terminology is commonly used in the context of rape and he should have been more careful, an ableist joke on twitter which he never apologized for and dismissed, and the first time I saw his twitter, he had posted a picture of himself and a person who was black but he described him as a white person with a really deep tan–I found that incredibly offensive) 

like i said, i try very hard to stay away from celebrity news because–it makes me uncomfortable–and maybe that’s a bad reason


I find his twitter persona extremely problematic. I don’t care that it’s a persona–it’s harmful, and if he’s going for satire, I don’t think it’s working. 

Eduction and being married to a feminist unfortunately has nothing to do with awareness to privilege (just look at the feminist movement in general). I don’t know anything about his wife other than she wrote a book about threesomes and that they renewed their wedding vows in drag (both of which sound cool to me, but I’ve never read her book even though I want to, so i hesitate to make judgement calls). Again, though, that doesn’t translate to who or who does not have an awareness of privilege.

I went to the Random Acts site. I’m not really sure what you mean that it sounds like it’s set up by someone who doesn’t understand structural inequality–is it because of the sillier things they do, like, what good will that do in the long run?

Some of the stuff by Random Acts has made me kinda squint–something about tea or setting up a vending machine that had really disgusting sounding flavors? idk it was, huh? – but their work in Haiti sounds more good than bad to me? Particularly the community center and the work towards education.

I am extremely ignorant in all this though–it’s one of the reasons I have trouble with nonprofits because I just don’t understand how much money is going for what they are supposedly about and what’s…not.

(I’m an intern with the American Liver Foundation–it is not as glamorizing as “non-profit” organization sounds, there’s a lot of “canon” privilege going on, etc.) 

And, of course, there is also a lot of intersectionality at work too. What kind of education will they be bringing into Haiti? will it be white-washed? because that’s not cool. 

And this is where it gets into waters that I don’t fully understand yet. Because, even if it’s to help, I think that certain kinds of help can be harmful and marginalizing. If it’s more white education that erases their culture and heritage–that is not cool.

But I don’t know any of those details. As far as I could tell, it wasn’t on the site. This bothers me.

As I understand it, Random Acts was inspired by Misha growing up extremely poor and a stranger randomly giving them a small sum of money which made that particular day a little bit brighter.

It sounds like the sillier side of Random Acts is based on this same concept and idea. A pair of shoes for a boy. Random toys for children in Mexico. Etc.

I feel uncomfortable saying that one can only help people in this specific way because sometimes a random kindness really can go a long way. Giving a random sandwich to someone who needs it can go a long way even if they’re going to be hungry tomorrow. 

So, personally? I will probably never donate to Random Acts simply because of the lack of transparency. 

As for Misha–I’m not in a position to judge him as a person.

But I think he needs to re-evaluate his twitter, and determine what purpose (if any) the persona serves. 

Because – some of the stuff there? is just deeply problematic.

I don’t consider Misha my overlord–I never have, even before i knew about his twitter or his charity. 

He’s just a man. He’s not perfect. He’s not flawless. He makes mistakes and sometimes he owns up to them and sometimes he doesn’t.

If I went to a con, I’d rather go to a Misha panel than a J2 panel. 

Don’t know if that means anything but there you have it.

[maybe the reason Gordon didn’t get redemption is because he was a villain? Maybe it had nothing to do with race]

did you not read my post? people make choices about who their characters are–who their protagonists are, who their villains are.

it’s not an accident or a coincidence that Sam, Dean, Bobby, and Castiel are the heroes of the show. It’s not a coincidence that they are the ones to come back. It is not a coincidence that they are white.

Remember how Gordon parallels Dean in every way? yet he is the villain even though his reasoning and logic is EXACTLY the same as Dean’s. By your logic, Dean shouldn’t have lived beyond the first season and should have died bloody while unfairly villainized. 

Remember how Rufus parallels Bobby? Hmmm. Who got to come back after he died? Who got to die with honor and validation as a father and a good person who helped his sons grow up to be heroes.

it’s not an accident that all the heroes who keep coming back from the dead over and over are white just like it’s not an accident that almost every single chromatic character has a) never come back b) never returned from the dead c) died gratuitously and bloody or d) became one dimensional bad guys who still died bloody and without mercy or redemption. 

come on–step outside your post-racial bubble.

that there is such a clear, stark difference of treatment between white recurring characters and chromatic recurring characters is not evidence of having “nothing to do with race.”

luceateis replied to your post: every time i see wank about how oh no a winchester…

and the only female characters they do like and think should live are ones coded by show as non-sexual mother figures (Ellen for example) or ~not a threat to ships~ because they’re queer (Charlie).

i’ll never forget when ellen wanted to show ellen as sexually into one of the brothers and kripke was like NO may he be the redshirt of his own life

robotstiel replied to your postevery time i see wank about how oh no a winchester…

and then they use ‘queer representation is important!!!’ to justify their blatant misogyny :)

those humpty dumpties and their queer fetishiziation. :’)

youstupidfucks replied to your post: What did Jensen say about Jo/Alona?

forever angry about this

yeah same

tearing down your co-stars, your writers

you’re doing it wrong

like is it so hard to say positive, uplifting things about them? they talk all the time about their other co-stars, many of whom were in even fewer episodes than Anna or Jo and talk about how they want them to come back even without a fan prompting them

and is it so hard to pay the same due to their other costars? 

like just imagine if the cast loved them as openly as their loved their fellow male cast members.

i bet things would be different.


whatwouldyouhavemedo replied to your post: axisofsymmetry replied to your post: ugh i might…

yeah, dean was really upset by everything that happened and…for fandom to interpret all of his body language as gaaaaaaaaaaay is…frustrating, i think.


i read meta that described it as “flinching” because of fear and some other negative emotions that i don’t remember because it was three in the morning

and it was the only meta on my dash that really focused on how it wasn’t sexual or “gay” and i was like thank you damn is it really that hard fandom

themostfeminist replied to your post: also i was thinking about the moment where castiel…

I’m surprised they didn’t make more of Metatron’s note - if it say xer intentions of the tablet they could fuck the canon. Or Metatron could have written it specifically to fuck the canon. I wish the writers noticed all these possibilities.

they don’t care about anything but themselves and wanking to the sound of their own voice and then dare to call it a story.

anon roundup regarding j2


to me it doesn’t take a lot of time to say

heck yes cas woulda been treated differently–i mean just look at the body count. or the slurs. but then that wouldn’t be very nice and cons are supposed to be fun but that’s still no excuse goddamn.

and besides

j2 has referred to the characters as sluts before and i – i’m just not gonna give them the benefit of the doubt on this one. 

i think you’re the anon who asked this?

But that’s the thing–like, it just doesn’t make sense to me because Raphael (and there is also intersecting race issues here, of course) was treated differently when their vessels changed–straight up proof that there is a difference in the way the narrative treats you. 

Raphael was treated worse. 

It’s just–it wouldn’t have been the same whether it was from the get go or for a single episode.

i’m legitimately upset by how many posts i’m seeing about how the the episode is not canon because of the lack of handprint.

and i know that some people have reblogged tags adding it to the becky one and swap meat one (i’m not sure why a lot of people hate swap meat–I know why i hate swap meat but idk why fandom does)–

but that people are just now pissed about the canon-icity of this episode? JUST NOW BEING PISSED ABOUT IT WHEN THERE IS SO MUCH WRONG ABOUT IT THAT IT SHOULDN’T BE PART OF THE SHOW’S CANON (both in a larger social context but also just within the freaking show itself)?

fandom stop being gross!

of course there is that irony

when technically that specific episode is part of the larger overreaching canon

because that episode was all about privileging the cis white straight male–who are the same individuals who construct the canon–

but people protest when the canon suddenly interferes with the gay tease switch n bait bantha poo stench that passes for representation in this fandom.