shinee goes grocery shopping


  • picked up a package of dubu and carried it around (”don’t talk to me or my son ever again”)
  • rotisserie chicken 
  • fried chicken tenders 
  • takes a sample, waits five minutes to casually walk by and take another one 
  • buys a pineapple to remember his boy pinee 
  • if lost can find him watching the crabs in the tanks 


  • smells candles until everything is just one indistinguishable strong scent and he has a huge headache 
  • pls no more chicken breast 
  • stress bought a whole chocolate mousse cake 
  • reenacting risky business in the aisles 
  • people are staring but what is shame???
  • uses most of his time choosing a body wash (”we are going to leave you here if you don’t pick one in the next three minutes”) 


  • buying fruit for juice cleanse and jam 
  • wallet is full of receipts and coupons 
  • actual coupon master. his total goes from $56.35 to $24.70
  • buys french baguettes and cheese to feel fancy 
  • another trip to the store, another pair of house slippers (he has too many for a person who has only two feet but this one is pink and has bunny ears so) 
  • ketchup 


  • avocados + bananas + protein powder 
  • buys all the practical shit like toilet paper and garbage bags 
  • helpful bagger 
  • lines up the shopping carts so well people keep asking him if he works there
  • doesn’t have the heart to tell them no so he helps customers get things from high shelves and stuff 


  • waits until he’s surviving off cup ramen to even go
  • puts random shit in the cart 
  • buys a jackfruit bc “it looks cool” but doesn’t know how to eat it so it’s just there… in the fridge… mocking him 
  • also never knows which groceries are his??? 
  • rides the shopping cart like a scooter (push, push, weeeeee)
  • makes direct eye contact with all the video cameras and doesn’t. look. away. security is v uncomfortable 

I recently became a cashier in a local supermarket, and even though I’ve only been working for a few weeks, I’ve already created a list of annoying things costumers do.

So here’s a list of the commandments of being a good shopper.

  • Only approach the register when you have every item you need and only them.
  • Don’t go leave your stuff off at the register only to go back to get something else.
  • Especially don’t leave after the cashier already started scanning your items, because then they can’t move on to the next costumer and they have to wait on your ass.
  • Don’t decide you don’t want a certain item after you’ve already brought it to the register, and if you do, at least have the common curtesy to put it back where you found it. Don’t make the supermarket employees do it for you. We have enough work already.
  • Only approach the register if you’re certain you have enough money to buy everything you want. Don’t make us and other costumers wait for you to get your wallet from your car.
  • Don’t pile your items on top of each other, it creates a pyramid that the cashier has to slowly dismantle without making it topple over. Believe me that waiting a few seconds for the cashier to scan your items before you put on any more will be much faster.
  • Buy. Frozen. Items. Last. I know it’s tempting to go straight for what you came for in the frozen foods aisle, but if you do, by the time you get to the register, the frozen packet will be all soggy and wet and the register will be full of water.

Feel free to add more.

So tonight I was in charge of the store for about three whole hours. This is a pretty big thing, since we’re a large supermarket and it was literally my first ever shift as a supervisor and they put me? In charge? Of closing the place? Which means they trust me a lot/think I’m capable of doing the right stuff.

Somewhere between realising I was in charge and really good at it and joking around with my workmates, I realised I actually love my job? And I’m genuinely excited to go to work now! So that is a cool thing.
It’s weird, because I always act like I don’t want to work because, y'know, that’s how everyone feels about supermarket/retail work right? But I really am genuinely passionate about the work, which when put into the context of working in a supermarket sounds super stupid, because nobody is passionate about supermarket work. It’s a job for school kids or people close to retirement age, there’s no such thing as passion in a job like that EXCEPT THERE IS, AND I LOVE IT, AND I WISH THERE WAS MORE RETAIL POSITIVITY BECAUSE I ABSOLUTELY LOVE MY JOB AND I PLAN ON RUNNING THE PLACE ONE DAY. GOODNIGHT.