story idea

a superhero story where the villain and the superhero are roommates and they keep making excuses to each other about why they are out all the time and after battles they stitch each other up after battles but neither has any idea that the other is their nemesis and they keep on having to lie to each other why they are covered in scratches and bruises


Requested by sybil-howlett 

“We’ve attracted quite an audience.”  Natasha informed you before pinning you to the matt.  Tilting your head slightly you were able to peek at the male Avengers who had taken up positions on the benches against the side of the wall.

“This happens every time.”  You pointed out, wrapping your legs tightly around her waist and using your body weight to roll you both over until you were sitting against her hips, pinning her down this time.

Natasha let out an airy laugh, trying to wiggle out of your pin to get the upper hand.  Finally she gave up, realizing your hold on her was significantly stronger than hers had been on you.  “Alright.  Let’s re-set and really give these guys something to stare at.”  Laughing you untangled from Natasha and helped her up, going back to separate ends of the matt to start a new round of sparring.

The Bruce Wayne

Something magical happens to iced coffee when you shake it with whiskey and maple syrup: You get a lovely, creamy head of foam on top — almost like a Guinness — that disguises the dark depths below (which contain enough caffeine to power any nocturnal superhero).

Serves 1

4½ oz. black iced coffee

2 oz bourbon

¼–½ oz. maple syrup (depending how sweet you like it)

Brew a pot of coffee and let chill until cold, or dilute cold-brew coffee concentrate with an equal amount of cold water. Measure all ingredients into a cocktail shaker filled with ice and shake thoroughly, until chilled and foamy. Strain into glass over ice.

listen if a dude starts quizzing you about superheros and comic book shit to see if ur a “fake nerd girl” just be like “who would win in a fight squirrel girl or (literally anyone)” bc guess what the answer is always squirrel girl she can kick anyones ass remind him squirrel girl could kick his faves ass she kicked dr dooms ass, wolverines ass even thanos got his ass kicked by squirrel girl

How to run a villain blog

Step 1. Get a Tumblr account

Step 2. Make your account have a different more common theme

Step 3. Steal someone else’s photo for your profile picture

Step 4. Write a bunch of funny content about that first theme

Step 5. Get a bit popular (followers in the 100s to 200s) (lots of posts with notes in the 100s as well)

Step 6. Gradually transition your theme to villain textposts

Step 7. Draw your very own header and profile images

Step 8. Simultaneously lose and gain followers

Step 9. Get your most popular posts in the 60s in notes

Step 10. Cry yourself to sleep

Step 11. Write a 6 minute pilot podcast script that you haven’t found time to add more episodes…

Step 12. Run out of content ideas for blog

Step 13. Write “How to run a villain blog”

Step 14. Cry again