superhero wedding

What would a open mic night standup in ML Paris look like? Can you even fathom how hilarious that would be? Just a handful of comics cracking jokes about what traveling abroad is like.

Comedian: “The stereotypes against the french are just out of control now. Everyone expects me to be wearing a beret and eating snails and that’s not fair. But you know, you have to hand it to them, there is a pretty sure fire way to know if someone is french now even from a distance. Because if we see a butterfly we will freaking scream.” 

I love the character specific ones, like Nino gets sorta well known in the comedy circuit when he’s a little older and he’s up there, smiling and interrupts his own jokes half the time with laughing, but his timing is impeccable. 

Nino: “So, super villains.” *the crowd waits for him to say more, but he shrugs as if the sentence needs nothing else, and laughter picks up. He’s grinning before he ‘sobers up’.* “Bad news, obviously. Probably. But, I can’t be the only jaded guy out there right? Like, am I not the only one who hears ‘MONSTER!!!’ and asks without looking up from my phone like, ‘Well, where? Like here?’” *crowds starts laughing and Nino pantomimes texting. “’Cause like, if it’s not on this block man, I was gonna order in probably.’” *laughter continues. Nino waits for a second nodding and smiling. “Have I put a pizzaman through hell by ordering two large pizzas in the middle of a warzone?” *nods* “Yes. Yes i have. Those guys are the real heroes.” *crowd laughs and he chuckles, taking his own queue to get back on topic. He readjusts the mic stand, feigning apprehension.* “So yeah. Super villains, bad news. Some more than others, and like, don’t get me wrong! It’s bad, but, come one. Everyone is a little curious what their super villain is. JUST A LITTLE.” *he calls over the laughter of the crowd, making them laugh even harder. He holds up his free hand that isnt dedicated to the microphone like hes placating them.* “I’m not saying that’s cool! I’m saying that’s the way it is. Paris is a weird freaking place now, gotta take those changes in stride. And for some of us, we already know, right? Got any other akumas in the house? *he waits, listening for the three or four cheers from different parts of the room* “Respect! Alright, so I’ve got something to ask, now that we’ve got that out in the open.” *he pauses, gesturing a little and looking around, building the tension* “Be real with me… But, come on. Was anyone else just a little disappointed?” *the crowd freaking explodes. Nino waits and tries to start again but he starts laughing too, and eventually has to raise his voice to be heard over the crowd.* “I mean, come on! You’re already striping me of my free will, now I don’t even get to pretend in the back of my head that maybe I looked super cool? I mean listen, we’ve all had our moments but, please appreciate the fact that I now have to live with the fact that my ‘dark’ alter ego is a bubble wielding super clown. Really, Hawkmoth? I don’t even get that much?” *Nino lets the laughter ride out, shaking his head and pacing the stage, chuckling to himself. In a slightly quieter voice he says* “Paris is weird man.” *slight laughter* “It is, it really is. But I grew up here you know, I remember the ‘pre-butterfly douchebag days. How weird is it? For the people who move here? Like when they pack their bags, hop on a train, get all moved in then BOOM” *Nino makes a large explosion with his hands* “Huge explosion! Shakes the earth! Fire down the side streets, evil cackling in the air, and they are seized with terror only to realize” *he pauses, turning full circle on the stage before shrugging* “No one cares. Everyone looks up, sure, they’re checking where it’s at but the people of Paris have got the calm and orderly exit thing down, it’s been years we are used to it. We’re just like ‘Oh, wow thats a rather big one isn’t it? Huh, anyways-’ Yeah no one cares. Unless it’s Mister Pigeon.” *huge laugh, a few foreign looking people look confused and Nino chuckles* “For those of you with an intact survival instinct and dont live here, it’s worth explaining. That this city has, twice, been taken over by a mad, pigeon wielding bad guy. TWICE. This is some real shit. People respect pigeons now, I will pay you to find one native citizen who still has the balls to kick at a pigeon. ONE.” 


and so on and so forth, with such famous bits as ‘Cat Noir makes a shitty roommate’ ‘Best Man at a superhero wedding doesnt really make you feel like the best man’ and ‘The Bubbler II: Return of the Super Clown (God Damnit)’

IMAGINE: Tony has proposed, and he’s allowed you to design the cake (although he’s still a little mad you put him on the bottom, even though you said it was because he’d get the biggest portion, and now he’s convinced you like Steve) and when the cake arrives and it’s being set up on the table everyone is confused. What the hell is with the city and the bat? Was it supposed to be a bad guy? You’d requested that Bruce had been placed there though…Both you and your guests turned, confused, when you heard loud laughter behind you and you found your good friend Wade Wilson laughing hysterically.

Welcome to the second week of the Humans 4 Week Fanwork Challenge!

Officially this week starts on June 10 and finishes on June 16, but of course you can fill any prompt, any time. (The word ‘write’ comes up a lot but definitely feel free to create other fanworks like art or gifs. It’s all good stuff!)

This week’s prompts are all about Alternate Universes! 

Day 1: Historical AU (Sat 10)
Put the characters in a different period of history. It’s up to you if there are still synths (steampunk!) or if everyone’s human. How are their lives different?  

Day 2: College/High School AU (Sun 11)
A classic fanfiction trope. Put the characters into some kind of education - are they teachers, students? Send them to senior prom! Or lock them up in detention! Up to you. 

Day 3: Crossover/Fusion (Mon 12) 
Do a mashup with one of your other favourite franchises. Popular ones in our fandom have been Merlin, Star Wars, and Doctor Who, but be as random as you like! Crossovers introduce characters/events from both sides, fusions usually put the characters of one into the world of the other. 

Day 4: Coffee Shop/Bookshop AU (Tue 13)
Another timeless classic. You know the drill. Someone works in that sweet little establishment around the corner, and someone else comes in looking for a coffee (or a novel or a necklace or a tin of dogfood) and finds much, much more… Cheese it up for this one. You know you want to. 

Day 5: Superhero AU (Wed 14)
Someone’s got a secret superhero identity… or maybe more than one someone. What powers do they have? Who do they want to save? (Who do they wish they could have saved?) 

Day 6: Pirate AU (Thu 15)
Arrrrrrr. Everyone’s a pirate now. Write about the characters’ adventures on the seven seas, looting and finding buried treasure and all those excellent piratey activities. This one has good opportunities for steampunk, too. 

Day 7: Human/Synth Switch AU (Fri 16)
Finally, back a bit closer to canon with this one. Imagine if the characters we know as human were actually synths, and all the synths were actually humans… how does that change things? (You don’t have to switch everyone, if you don’t want to. Feel free to focus on just one or two characters.) 

Tag your posts with “#humanschallenge”, or tag @humanschallenge in the post to make sure we see it. 

Send a private message if you have any queries, but other than that… get creating!

(Oh, one more thing: the fourth week of this challenge is a Collab Week, where everyone is encouraged to expand/develop/continue other works produced in the challenge. Obviously it’s up to you whether or not you want other participants to interact with your work in this way, so if you want to opt-out, just put a note somewhere in your post, saying the fic isn’t eligible for Collab Week.)

traincat  asked:

Spideytorch and 20 for the kiss meme?

The wedding ends at exactly 1:17pm. It takes another half hour for Johnny and Peter to escape all of the well-wishers and hordes of screaming fans that are gathered outside of the church and then climb into the limo that’s waiting to whisk them away to the reception.

It takes a moment for Peter to grow accustomed to the silence of the empty limo after the din that had greeted them the moment the ornate wooden doors of the church had swung open.

By Peter’s count, there were eleven kings, nineteen queens, and seventeen heads of state in attendance at their wedding. Every superhero in New York. Half the celebrities of every persuasion—sports superstars, singers, actors, everyone. A large portion of the invitees were not from Earth. Peter knows from the guest list that there were a few intergalactic emperors and the odd god or two sitting in those pews and listening to him recite his vows.

This isn’t, so far, like any wedding Peter’d ever dreamed of having. He’d expected it to be a modest affair, attended by his aunt, his uncle, maybe a couple of friends. Thirty people, tops.

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