super laps

How Dan and Phil probably broke up #37
  • Phil: *gets Dan a whisk for Christmas*

for @forestpenguin​ for the prompt: i see you carrying around a bowl of dog food and calling for your dog and, let’s be honest, i definitely think this is trap but on the other hand there is the potential to pet a dog at the end. so i stop to help you and you’re so relieved as we spend the next several hours searching for your dog until we finally give up and i take you home since you’re inconsolable only to find your dog asleep on your fucking porch wtf.

in which Cassian’s adopted ex-racer greyhound, K2-SO is awful, willful, misbehaved, and the light of his life. When K2 goes missing, Cassian frantically searches the neighborhood, his desperate calls awakening Bodhi, his neighbor, who offers to help. Just as Cassian has given up hope and gotten drawn and surly, Bodhi walks him back home - and lo and behold, K2 has been scratching at the front door and nearly knocks Bodhi out bounding into Cassian’s arms.

this is ur gentle reminder that bobbi likes tol boys who will let her sit in their laps and play with their hair and make out with them for hours

anonymous asked:

Ya know I thought that comic you made of Zenyatta doing a flip onto Genji's lap was super cute and made me smile, and then it made me laugh because I imagined Genji stiffening up and stuttering out in pain; "M- Master y-you're crushing my d*ck..." And Zenyatta being all like; "I was not aware you still had one." All nonchalantly.

zenyatta, stop embarrassing ur boyfriend

Third wheel :phan

;Summary: Pj is over to Dan and Phil’s apartment and they are watching game of thrones and Dan is sitting on Phil’s lap and super comfy, Phil can’t focus on the show because Dan is just looking very beautiful and they start kissing and saying cute things to each other

;Warnings: none

;Genre: fluff

;Phil watched Dan as he watched game of thrones looking completely beautiful, Phil tucked a stray of hair from Dan’s eyes and Dan looked up at him and smiled. ;“You are so beautiful” Phil whispered and looked over at Pj who was lost in the show.

;“But you are perfect” dan whispered and nuzzled his nose in my neck.

;Phil smiled and continued;

;“No you are perfect…you are flawless” ;

;“I have flaws” Dan said and kissed my jaw.;

“Even your flaws are flawless” phil said and looked down at Dan, he was looking at Phil with so much adore in his eyes it hurt.

“Phil that doesn’t make any sense” Dan said chuckling.

“Shhhh” Pj shushed loudly.

;Both Dan and Phil shook their heads and looked at each other, Dan couldn’t be more luckier to have Phil Lester as his boyfriend.

;“I am so lucky to have you” Dan said.

;“Really? But I feel like I am on top of the world with you” Phil said and pecked Dan on the lips, Dan pecked Phil with the same amount of love then Phil licked Dan’s bottom lip and Dan parted his lips allowing Phil to explore his mouth as much as he wanted.;

Phil delicately placed his hands on Dan’s cheek and Dan wrapped his arms around phil’s shoulders.;

;“I love you” Phil muttered against Dan’s lips.

;“And I love you…so much….more than anything” Dan said.

;“Guys seriously..” Pj muttered.

;Dan and Phil turned their heads towards Pj and sighed.

;“Peej it’s not our fault you are a single Pringle” Dan said smirking and kissing phil’s cheek.

;“You know what I am going home” Pj said but chucked and said” you guys can now fuck all you want”

Dan kissed his middle finger and Pointed at Peej who just rolled his eyes and went towards the door.

;l;“Now where were we” Phil said and pushed on his back and they started make my out again.;

fatedeniedhope  asked:

S/o tries they best to make jack morrison (before he became soldier 76) blush and kisses him infront of everyone and runs for it.

(hahahaha I’m so sorry, but I have to do this.)

  • S/O would put every tactic that they knew up to this point against Jack.
  • From the cutesy talk (maybe he’ll blush of how cute they are??) to the sexy talk
  • S/O just couldn’t get any of it to work!!!
  • It wasn’t until Gabriel (probably jokingly spitefully) gave some advice did they find something
  • S/O would purposely saunter over to Jack, making sure he was sitting somewhere comfy
  • S/O then proceeds to sit in his lap, snuggling up to him all cutely like they’ve done before
  • Leans up just close enough for him to hear their whisper
  • “Do you like it when I’m like this… daddy”
  • GIves a quick kiss on the cheek and jumps off of his lap super quickly
  • Has a giggle fit down the hall as he’s chasing them, asking them what the hell was that about
  • Growls at them to not takes lessons from Gabe when they admit he gave them the idea

-Admin Kitty

anonymous asked:

some kenkage if you have time? i love them so much ♥(ˆ⌣ˆԅ)

i jump at ANY chance to talk about KageKen, my first rare pair, my love, my awkward babies, my kageken OTL


  • (I’ve shared this HC before) Kageyama sleeps really early (for his height!!!), and Kenma sleeps pretty irregularly, either super early or super late.
  • When Kenma sleeps really really late, he’d crawl into bed and wrap his arms around Kageyama’s middle and rests his head on Kageyama’s back
  • Kageyama would wake up with a cat attached to his back
  • Kenma is usually the big spoon though. I have this mental image of Kenma playing games late into the night while Kageyama snores softly in his arms. Like after a long day of volleyball practice, Kageyama would literally collapse (super satisfied) into Kenma’s lap or arms.
  • but sometimes when Kenma is having a bad day, or when he’s been stimulated too much during the day, Kageyama would be the big spoon, and wrap Kenma up in an excessive amount of blankets, and give him a milk box and even offer to run out to buy him pork curry rice, even though Kenma isn’t really that interested in food.
  • Kenma appreciates the sentiment though.
  • They’re both pretty shy when it comes to showing affection in public,  but Kageyama shows more.
  • When they meet up he’d lean down and kiss Kenma’s cheek lightly before pulling away with a blush (he, eventually, can do it without blushing right down to his neck, but it takes a bit of time)
  • He really loves carding his hand through Kenma’s hair. It’s soft and long, and sometimes Kenma snuggles against his palm and it makes Kageyama’s heart go boom
  • Kenma not stuffing his hand into his pocket so Kageyama could hold it if he wants. The first time he does this he doesn’t look at Kageyama and Kageyama doesn’t catch on. But the second time he brushes his fingers against Kageyama’s and then he gets it
  • Kenma stretching up slightly to kiss the side of Kageyama’s neck, right near his pulse (ʘ‿ʘ)  he’d then press his forehead against Kageyama’s collarbone, the tips of his ears tinted red

I freaking love this ship so much

pokemonashketchumfan  asked:

What was Elmer like? Also, which one of your ferrets would win in a race against each other?

I’ll answer the quick question first - Tux would win!  When he chases toys, he runs so hard and so fast that you can feel the floor shake.  He also really LOVES to chase me!  Like, at top speed.

But if it was a race down the stairs, maybe Elmer would win.

The second question - Elmer was the best. ;_;  He was super playful and crazy and so funny to watch

…but also a super mellow lap ferret the second you picked him up and gave him attention.  He used to ride around on my shoulder or my arm while I did stuff in the kitchen, and I didn’t have to worry much about him trying to jump off.

He slept in my lap all the time.  He loved getting head rubs and chin rubs, and he had a major staring problem.  I love ferrets who make good eye contact, and he would just lie on his back and stare and stare and it was really cute.  And even though he played hard, he never bit people.  (Well, one exception - he would bite my sister’s feet while she was brushing her teeth because she was using “his” spot on the bathroom rug.)  But he was really super sweet.

He loved to play in water, and when I gave him soup, he’d steal his entire food bowl.  Basically, the gifset I made in his memory (which always gets picked apart and reposted as generic animal content ;_; - even Buzzfeed used the peanut butter gif without the right credit) is a good representation of him.

His best friend was Gumby, and together they were the Dumbrothers.  They were the closest bonded pair I’ve ever had.  Like, I have 20 million pictures of them doing dumb stuff together, but the post would get too long, so have this one (Elmer is the one with the “jacket”):

The Dumbrothers have a music video:

Elmer is the one you see doing all the crazy stuff.  Gumby is the one playing with that plastic chain toy, hiding in a towel, and getting shoulder rubs.  They were basically joined at the hip and did everything together, but Gumby was two years older, and when he died, Elmer just didn’t want to stick around anymore.  He was also sick with insulinoma and lymphoma by that time.

A lot of Elmer’s personality had to do with the fact that he had Waardenburg Syndrome.  So he was also deaf (hence the flipping out at a peanut butter jar).  But I’ve seen some other deaf and/or Waardenburg ferrets play *too* rough and be mean to other ferrets because they don’t know when to stop (ahem, Kit), and Elmer wasn’t like that.

He was missing all his bottom front teeth, everything between his canines.  He just never had any.  I mean, he was *really* inbred, so whatever.

Poke bird calls all ferrets Elmer.  For some reason, that was the only ferret name she learned.  She also got jealous of him sometimes because he got so much attention.  It’s hard because Kit looks a lot like Elmer, and sometimes that messes me up.  Their personalities are VERY different, though.  Kit is much more active and playful and doesn’t really like getting held and petted and stuff.

This is one of my favorite Elmer pictures:

its-gg-xo  asked:

Laito turn ons please (^_^)☆

- Everything? 

- Lip biting.

- His lover being open to anything.

- Clumsiness.

- Dimpled smiles.

- Cute accent.

- Sitting on his lap.

- Being super excited to see him after a while.

- Being able to handle his brothers and sass them. 

anonymous asked:

hey! so i got in a big argument today in class defending Ophelia, because this guy was saying that he thought she was lame and shouldn't have been in Hamlet. the professor decided to have a kind of debate for next class about her, and i was wondering, do you have any ideas about what i should bring up or sources on Ophelia or anything?

fuck that guy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

as far as sources go, a couple of things come to mind.  one is this essay which is about ophelia and how she reflects on female pain and subverts like the ways in which women are expected to respond to trauma etc.  the other one is the short play hamletmachine by heiner muller, which is a really interesting interpretive re-working of hamlet that brings out some of the more brutalistic currents of the play.  you can (& should) read the entire play at the link i just gave, but the part i was thinking of as particularly relevant was this passage:

also when I was going through my hamlet tag just now I found this quote which is from the book stay, illusion!: the hamlet doctrine which is a really cool book that briefly outlines most of the major critical interpretations of hamlet in a series of brief essays.

as far as ideas, i have so many fucking ideas about ophelia and i’m supposed to be writing a paper right now but like, briefly:

  • maybe what this douchebag in your english class is responding to is how tangential ophelia’s story seems to be to hamlet’s, and how much her madness seems to come out of nowhere.  both of these things are true (although you could actually say the same about most of the characters in the play: it’s almost like there’s an overarching theme of isolation and the fundamental loneliness of the human existence which shakespeare is underscoring by making the characters so distant and isolated from one another.  it’s almost like shakespeare knows what the fuck he’s doing! anyway) so better than “ophelia is lame and shouldn’t be in this play,” a better response to that observation might be “what is ophelia doing here? what does she add thematically? how does she affect the other characters? how might the other characters who interact with her be different if she weren’t there, and what is is about that difference that you think shakespeare didn’t want? 
  • how would laertes be different if his quest for revenge were simply motivated by his father’s death and his own ambition
  • how would gertrude, & especially gertrude’s death, be different without “I hoped thou shouldst have been my Hamlet’s wife; / I thought thy bride-bed to have deck’d, sweet maid, /And not have strew’d thy grave,” not to mention without her lowkey complicity in ophelia’s suicide
  • how would hamlet of course be different without the nunnery scene, if his misogyny were only directed at his mother, without the many suggestions of sexual assault and harassment (“lady shall I lie upon your lap,” ophelia’s super weird speech at the beginning of II.i, “quoth she before you tumbled me you promised me to wed / so would i had done by yonder sun and thou hadst not come to my bed”)
  • polonius obviously.  would he be less sympathetic or more so?  what is their relationship?  in my opinion it’s one of the most ambiguous in the play.  I think a lot about this thing that the victorian actress ellen terry once said: ”How many times Shakespeare draws fathers and daughters, never mothers and daughters.” why?  what does it add? ask these questions these are the productive questions
  • so that’s one possible avenue of thought
  • ophelia is so gendered.  imo she is more defined by her gender than anyone else in the play, which might be why this guy doesn’t get what’s going on with her.  everything that happens to her goes back to her gender, way more than gertrude even
  • this is what happens to ophelia: she is in love with prince hamlet.  her father and brother warn her extremely strongly that if she sleeps with him, she will lose all of her value as a person and he will abandon her (meanwhile her father literally wants to spread rumors that his son has been seeing prostitutes in paris; the contrast between laertes’ sexual liberty and ophelia’s lack thereof is SO heavy-handed and obvious that it’s impossible not to think that shakespeare sees it as very important).  she quietly acquiesces to this restraint.  her father uses her as a tool to spy on hamlet (“I’ll loose my daughter to him”—literally a verb you might use to describe mating farm animals), thus losing her hamlet’s trust and respect.  hamlet tells her he does not love her, he had never loved her, is extremely verbally abusive to her, humiliates her in front of the court (“lady shall I lie upon your lap” etc).  she bears this smilingly “you are naught, you are naught! i’ll mark the play”).  then hamlet murders her father.  
  • we do not see ophelia hear this news. that in itself is interesting: up to this point, we have only seen ophelia acted upon: her only lengthy speech (“my lord as I was sewing in my closet”) is simply an account of things hamlet did to her (and you can definitely play/read that speech as a traumatized account of an act of sexual violence.  it reads that way so much! like how she focuses minutely on obscure details and dissociates herself from the actual content of what’s happening).  but we don’t see anyone perform the action of breaking her heart
  • instead, we see her madness.  ophelia’s madness is amazing!!!!! there is so much to say about it!  this paper is due at 1:30!  ok very briefly:
  • ophelia has expressed virutally nothing about herself up to this point.  she has no opinions, no interests, no personal traits.  that’s part of the reason the mad scene is so shocking: she goes from being a completely passive, almost non-person to a completely active one
  • why is the madness so sexual????? why is there so much reference to sex and sexual violence/???  is it because her father’s and brother’s obsessive guarding of her virginity has made her totally fixated on sex and terrified of it?  is it because she’s been sexually abused in some way? by hamlet? by someone else?
  • ophelia becomes a threat at this point.  her speech is nothing, yet the unshaped use of it doth move the hearers to collection.  ophelia! a threat!
  • think about the line: “Well, God ‘ild you! They say the owl was a baker’s
    daughter. Lord, we know what we are, but know not
    what we may be. God be at your table!”  think about that line for a long time.
  • there’s so much good shit in the mad scene

  • ophelia has no power.  she is a completely passive victim.  she gets backed into a corner and instead of dissolving and collapsing into herself as women are supposed to, she explodes.  she becomes an AGENT.  the only thing she has control over is the nature of her demise and she takes that control for all it’s worth.  she fights back!!! the tragedy is that the only means by which she can fight back is a self-destructive one.  and how many women have turned to self-destruction in a desperate effort to prove that they exist?
  • as a final note, one thing that really interests me about ophelia is the association that exists around her character between sex and death.  her father and brother essentially tell her that loss of her virginity is equivalent to loss of her life, and from that idea springs an increasingly grotesque series of images wedding sex and death to each other
    • ofc the fact that her mad scene is all about sex and it comes immediately before her death
    • this incredible, incredible line from gertrude’s description of her death which I think about all of the time: “There with fantastic garlands did she come / Of crow-flowers, nettles, daisies, and long purples / That liberal shepherds give a grosser name / But our cold maids do dead men’s fingers call them.”  she decked herself with these long purple flowers which men sees as phallic and women see as the hand of death!!!!!   holy shit!!!!
    • and of course again, “”I hoped thou shouldst have been my Hamlet’s wife; / I thought thy bride-bed to have deck’d, sweet maid, /And not have strew’d thy grave.”  and of course hamlet leaping into her grave and embracing her.  bride of death!! bride of death!! bride of death!! bride of death!!
  • and on the same note, why are there so many fucking paintings of ophelia?  google image search “painting of ophelia” right now.  mostly beginning in the early 19th century this trope started to emerge of paintings of ophelia drowning.  she always looks beautiful and serene, her head throw to the sky, her mouth open in something between sexual ecstasy and childlike surprise.  ophelia is a central figure in the aestheticization of dead women, the romanticization of violence against women.  there’s so much ophelia imagery in dostoevsky, for example.  helpless beautiful dead childlike girls with blue lips and fingers, wreathed in flowers, their heads thrown back, their mouth and eyes wide.  and this trope persists!  discussions about ophelia always make me think about the image of laura palmer in the first episode of twin peaks.

why do these images exist?  why is it aesthetically pleasing to see women dead?  in my opinion this is a deep cultural irony: shakespeare was trying to show us women’s mortal terror of sex and the current of violence that runs through young women’s lives, and instead of listening to him we fetishized that very violence.  we celebrated it.  we have all killed ophelia.  how can we live with ourselves?

i hope this was helpful.  let me know how it goes.

anonymous asked:

Can I have some details about domestic kidstorm


  • Okay so they got a little apartment together in Central City that’s a couple blocks from the school where Stein teaches, right in a college neighborhood
  • None of their towels match because they just bought one of each that had a cool pattern
  • Neither of them can technically cook well but they get so. dang. proud. of putting literally any form of food on the table. 
    • “I mean this meal included a vegetable, so I think we’re doing pretty good.” “Hell yeah!” *couple’s high five*
    • Wally brings home Chinese for dinner and comes through the door like “I HAVE PROVIDED”
    • Jax makes waffles for breakfast and Wally’s so stoked that they end up making out against the fridge until they remember the waffles are getting cold.
  • Iris adores Jax and comes over all the time to hang out and tell them they need to buy better food.
  • They pretty much gave up on owning their own clothes the second they moved in together. (Although Wally has a complex system of letting Jax wear sweatshirts for a few days so they smell like Jax and then taking them back.)
  • Wally brought several incredibly tacky lava lamps when they moved in and refuses to get rid of them.
  • Jax and Wally are the biggest cuddlers on the planet. They’ll jam themselves into one corner of the couch, spend an hour just snuggling in bed in the morning, you name it. Jax has slightly greater big spoon tendencies but they’re versatile. 
  • They kept buying each other little toy cars as joke gifts but then their friends started getting in on it too and now it’s a seriously impressive collection, so there a little cars all over their apartment. On the coffee table, on top of the microwave, on the back of the toilet, you name it.
  • They send each other cheesy little playlists like all the time, it’s adorable.
  • Double dates with Iris and Barry what uuuuup
  • Jax does more dishes, Wally does more laundry. Both of them hate cleaning the bathroom and will try to find ways to make the other one do it. Jax tries to set up a fair every-other-week system; Wally tries to get out of it with sexual favors. 
  • They visit Joe and Jax’s mom at least once a week, because both of them appreciate the heck out of their living parents, okay?
  • Wally lost his key like the first week there and didn’t want to tell Jax, so he’s just been sneaking in through the fire escape. It took Jax like a month to figure it out and when he did he wasn’t sure if he wanted to laugh or bang his head on the wall.
  • They’ve got a little radio on the window sill that picks up the awesome alternative college station and it’s one approximately 24-7. 
  • There’s always Gatorade in the fridge. Always. Jax needs it. 
  • Speaking of: Jax likes to go running in the evenings. Wally, who hates running, refuses to join him. And then he gets super speed and laps him just to be a little shit
  • Concept: Wally and Jax in their boxers and hoodies enjoying a lazy Sunday eating cereal on the couch in their sun-filled living room. They sit with their legs overlapping. They’re utterly content. 

I’m sorry, I’m so bad at domestic, I tried and some of it’s cute

anonymous asked:

Relationship headcanons for Law, Kid, Ace and Zoro? (:


I will do my best (●´ω`●)


  • Because Law has a colder personality, PDA is a rare thing for him, but when he does show his affection, most of the time it will be him slinging an arm over his partners shoulders.
  • He is protective of his S/O but does not like to show it, unless they are in real danger, so most of the time, he will secretly watch over his partner or have some of his crew members do it.
  • If he sees his partner blush/ fluster over something, he never lets them live it down. He will bring it up or put them in that kind of situation again on purpose in order to see them blush and get a little cranky while he smirks/ chuckles.
  • When relaxing with his S/O on the ship, he will hold his partner close and sneak some kisses.


  • EXTREMELY protective and possessive of his partner.
  • ^^ That being said he will fight anyone who stares at his partner too long or too  much.
  • Although Kid has a brutal nature, behind closed doors, he can be very gentle with his partner and treat them like a delicate, little flower.
  • Lots of PDA, especially at pubs/bars. He will always have his arm wrapped around his partners waist/butt because holding hands isn’t really his thing or have his S/O sit on his lap.


  • SUPER SWEET CUTIE PATOOTIE. He would take such good care of his S/O and treat them so gently.
  • Perfect gentleman, he is the type to open all the doors for his S/O and he would always make sure his S/O is okay and comfortable with whatever he is doing.
  • He is super goofy around his partner and loves to make and hear them laugh.
  • While walking out and about, he constantly has his arm around his partners waist and will occasionally plant kisses on his S/O’s temple.


  • He isn’t huge on PDA but sometimes he will hold his S/O’s hand.
  • He enjoys relaxing with his partner or taking naps with them since the crew is so rambunctious.
  • He likes it when his partner watching him work out and will see it as a chance to show off his strength.
  • He always has an eye on his partner and where they are.
  • He likes it when his partner plants little kisses all over his face. He acts like he’s annoyed, but secretly wants them to continue (not that he’ll ever admit it).