anonymous asked:

"Aren't you even going to cry?" Xx

The Mill is dark. 

Robert came home, poured himself a drink and sat down. He can’t remember what number drink he is on, but the sun has gone down and the only light in the room is from the streetlamps outside.

It hurts; somewhere in his chest a hole has appeared, a hole left from something recently lost. Maybe he shouldn’t be feeling it at all. Maybe the alcohol will drown it out.

He winces as he takes another sip, winces when the lights suddenly come on and his eyes need a moment to adjust. He can’t help but wince at the expression on Aaron’s face. Anger is the best word to describe it. 

“Want one?” Robert asks, raising his glass towards his husband. At least they are still husbands. 

“No,” Aaron replies curtly, lips thin and eyes shrewd, “thanks.”

“Suit yourself,” Robert mutters. The whiskey burns on its way down, less than it did when he started at least. His nerves are starting to feel less. Good. 

Aaron sits down opposite him, places a hand over Robert’s, squeezes. 

“Robert, I’m sorry -” 

“Don’t,” Robert interrupts. It is unkind but he can’t hear it right now. It is all coming crashing down and he can’t hear it. 

Aaron looks at him, waits, eyes pleading but voice silent. He let’s Robert sit, maybe he knows that this is how Robert needs to handle it. Robert hopes so as he knocks back his glass and sets it down on the table harder than necessary. 

“Talk to me,” Aaron whispers. Robert’s head jerks sideways, a quick shake that reminds him of what he heard, what he knows. He bites his lip to stifle a sob. He can’t cry. Not because of this. 

“Don’t know what to say.”

Aaron moves his chair closer, places his other hand on Robert’s thigh. 

“Tell me what you’re thinking.” Aaron’s voice is soft, gentle, kind. It cuts through Robert’s barriers more efficiently than he would like to admit. He remains silent nevertheless. “Aren’t you even going to cry?” 

Robert shakes his head, refuses to think about it. Refuses to remember Ross loudly proclaim that the child is his; refuses to remember Rebecca admit that they didn’t - that he didn’t. 

“I shouldn’t cry, Aaron… not over this.” Robert manages to say the words without his chin quivering. “I don’t want to cry because I won’t be a father, I don’t want you to think it makes me sad.” 

Aaron shakes his head, eyes sad as he looks at his husband. 

“You’re allowed to feel, Robert… You have hated yourself for months, and now you know it was all a lie. I’ve seen how it has eaten at you, but it’s over now,” Aaron whispers softly. “You don’t have to hate yourself anymore.” 

Robert’s shoulders shake at Aaron’s words, breaking the dam. He sobs, presses his cheek to Aaron’s shoulder as he wraps his arms around him. Aaron can help him. Aaron always does. By the time he is done Aaron’s shoulder is soggy and Robert feels wrung out, exhausted, broken. 

Aaron makes him some toast and pulls him upstairs. He curls in on himself and can almost feel the hole left behind by his self-loathing and guilt in his chest. The alcohol wasn’t entirely efficient enough then.

He has been hating himself for so long he doesn’t know how to stop. 

Maybe Aaron can help with that too.

okay prefacing this with– I’ve only watched the first season so far, in case that influences anything 

But anyway– Steven Universe: am I the only one who is seeing like constant parallels and references to Dragon Ball Z? Like 

  • an alien race with super powers who are colonizing planets 
  • everyone of them is the same gender
  • small group of aliens are defending earth
  • an important figure in their history had a kid with a human, and now that kid is central to the story (gohan//steven) and he has never gone to school and his human parent is always nervous about him going on missions
  • fusion dances
  • colorful outfits

also jokes like in Garnet’s Universe which was packed with DBZ references

anonymous asked:

some times I take cold showers to remind myself not everyone has hot water/clean water. do you have weird habits? 💖

what the heck that’s so selfless and sweet and kind!!!! ✨ I have some weird habits, like smelling the pages of books when I read them, I make playlists as a coping mechanism, i feel lost without gum or my hairband on my wrist, i get crushes easily on people who are super nice to me, i can’t feel completely calm at night unless I write in my diary. thanks for asking! have a nice day selfless anon 🌿🌷🌸

there’s this set of siblings who came to camp last summer who were Super Adorable like the youngest was going into first grade, and he was such a cuddle bug, and the older one was like Grumpy All The Time but super sweet. and they had another brother who didn’t come to camp but would always come with their grandfather to pick them up and he always got rly excited to see me and he would give me a hug and talk to me about whatever toy he brought with him that day and he’s coming to camp this summer w his brothers and i am STOKED bc he’s in my group and so is the other older brother.

The slash discourse makes me feel really really really dysphoric.

I figured out I was a guy because I wrote a lot of slash/’yaoi’ with my female bff. Roleplaying as a guy felt Right, in a way that performing femininity didn’t.  Roleplaying angsty queer boys being angsty because of homophobia helped me work through my own experiences with homophobia and biphobia and transphobia. Roleplaying angsty boys who were emotionally vulnerable or super femmey subby boys who ‘acted too much like girls’ helped me figure out that I could be masc and still not have to give up my ability to… you know, have emotions and be kind to the people around me.

Most of the slash I write - because I do still write it! I just don’t publish it anywhere- is like that. It’s extremely Slash Tropey. ‘There Is Only One Bed What Do’ tropey. Or ‘Queer Boy Has Angst And Insists He’s Not Queer’ tropey. Or ‘D/S with some Seme/Uke Dynamics Going On’ tropey. 

…and I feel like, because cis gay men don’t like slash, they’re saying I’m not supposed to either, and if I like it I can’t be a real man. It’s an irrational feeling, but it’s a feeling I have and it’s gross and I wish it would go away.

anonymous asked:

hey so im Evan, the anon with shitty parents. i told my mother a few weeks ago that im a lesbian (before i realised im trans) and she said that its okay with her but im too young. though less than a week after she made a homophobic comment. my father is trash on lgbt. theres no way im coming out but i have a really supportive sister who knows i like girls and that im not cis, and i have very supportive friends. just letting you know that im okay and ily. - Evan

Evan I hope the best for you. I hope u get a super cute gf who gives you smooches and that your parents someday appreciate what a good kid u are.

isnt it amazing 👏 👏 how mera can be so in love with her super-husband 👏 👏 whos so strong and powerful 👏 👏 and she can still be strong, independent and a fucking badass who can kick everyones butt if she wants to ? 👏 👏 isnt it amazing 👏 👏 how she isnt degraded to some damsel in distress 👏 👏 but she actually often is the one to save her husbands ( perfectly shaped ) ass ? 👏 👏   oh what a woman ! 😍 😍 😍

Yeeeah, not gonna sit through a talk of people scoffing dismissively about millenials while supposedly wanting to learn about millenials.

Maybe I’m colored by my view of myself and my cohorts where work ethic and professional values are A Thing that we have (because most of my friends are fellow managers and you don’t get to that position without a hell of a lot of hard work), but I’ve worked with plenty of people from all generations who are super unprofessional and lazy.

In short, unprofessionalism and laziness is not a generational thing and I’m super tired of people defining millenials being painted by that same brush.

'Sportacus is a time lord' He's a fucking elf super hero who enjoys being healthy and teaching kids how to lead a healthy lifestyle shut the fuck up.

I’ve got nothing against Doctor Who I’m just getting sick of fans constantly claiming certain characters are time lords. Just stop.

i just spent around 20 minutes looking through my ask box (which has like 300-400 msgs from over 4-5 years that I never deleted) for some old thing and good heavens I feel like such a shitty person bc there are some mega sweet and thoughtful messages that I never actually ANSWERED and if I answered them now it would be so awkward aljsdlkfjsd;fkl;a

i’m sorry if you’ve ever sent me an ask and didn’t get a reply! i was probably being a wreck of a human being and put off answering you properly for fear of saying the wrong thing !!!

actually u know what now that I’m doing this I might as well just tag the ppl I’ve seen so far: @wyvernage who is super cool and sweet and brightened my world w an anonymous message when I was having a hard time. 

and @maybellemilk ​ who has such a great taste in music (i’m still in ur debt for showing me ‘girl inform me’ by the shins) and makes x20 cuter art than what I remember from when we first met. i think i’ve abandoned dA for good at this point tho omg I’m so sorry, but it’s still so good to know you’re still on tumblr and to see ur lovely art from time to time

There are people out here asking why we’re so hyped for Black Panther.

Like…in case you haven’t noticed…there’s literally a million and five big budget franchise movies centered around white super heroes.

Black Panther shows a black super hero who is the king of an extremely prominent and technologically advanced African country with his badass royal guard that consist of badass black women in all their natural glory and it portrays black people as something other than poor, enslaved, or savage.

Regardless if you understand or not…that is huge for black people.

The Signs as Lovers
  • *use moon or venus*
  • Aries: The one who's always down for an adventure. Knows how to separate work and play. Fiesty and needs to keep some independence in the relationship.
  • Taurus: The one who prefers a movie night at home. Super cuddlers who just wanna love you. Sensual, loves the feeling of skin on skin, the sweet aroma of baked goods and the sound of your heart beating when they rest on your chest.
  • Gemini: The one who knows it all. They frustrate you with their endless debating but in the end, never fail to amaze you with how much knowledge they hold. They love an intellectual challenge and need to be kept on their toes. Lose the intellectual stimulation and lose them too.
  • Cancer: The one who sticks with you. Theyre there for better or for worse, if you promise them the same. If they're low on food or sleep, expect the crab to show it's claws. They love intimacy with a little spark and a lot of passion. They need lots of love and attention but you're promised the same in return.
  • Leo: The one who shows you off. They never fail to post your pictures and aren't ashamed to have you on their arm. They need their ego tended to because despite their attempts at hiding it, they're incredibly insecure. They're high maintenance and need loads of attention without being smothered. They show love through gifts and compliments and expect the same.
  • Virgo: The one whos introspective yet assuring. They're often over critical and anxious but theyre always willing to help you in a crisis. They're incredibly dependable and secure without being clingy. You don't need to question if they love you, because you already know.
  • Libra: The one who can't make up their mind. They can't seem to pick, whether it's a partner or a place to eat or a new phone, the Libra finds a way to get caught between the choices. They fall in love quickly and often fall out of love at the same pace until they find someone who they truly care for. They're very loving and you can rely on them for a confidence boost.
  • Scorpio: The one full of raw passion. While a Scorpio may seem harsh and distant at first, you recognize there's a depth and complexity to them nobody can every truly put together. There's always a piece of themselves hidden and it keeps the mystery alive. A high sex drive and lots of passion accompany this sign.
  • Sagittarius: The one who's always changing. They're adaptive and have fluctuating attitudes and personality traits. They stand by their beliefs but are incredibly open minded. They'll always listen to what you have to say and take your experiences and opinions into account. This sign has an inner free spirit who needs to be nurtured.
  • Capricorn: The one who plays dirty. They work hard but play harder. They hold a harsh type of romance and aren't very clingy. While they may seem detached in romantic aspects, they never fail to show their passions in the bedroom. They surround themselves with luxury and prefer comfortable and expensive living.
  • Aquarius: The one who thinks for themselves. They have strong views that are normally unwavered. They want what's best for humanity and the world, they need a partner who acknowledges this side of them. They seem disconnected but always find a way to still show they love you. They like thinking up new, original date ideas and ways to show you how much they truly care.
  • Pisces: The one who needs you. They love the idea of love. They're escapists at heart and often use sex or other pleasures to mute reality. They become attached easily and once they love you, they're willing to stay through anything. These are the types of lovers who need constant reassurance. They need to know they're needed and wanted and loved. If you show them that, they'll give you the world.

What a complete shit show. It’s like a scene stolen from Get Out.

NOW can we finally drop kick the Clintons, the DLC and neoliberalism out of the Democratic Party? Can we at least stop pretending that they’re progressives, instead of neoliberals with a “benevolent” plantation owner mentality?

If you haven’t already seen it, now is probably a very very good time to watch 13th, a documentary about how prison labor is legalized slavery.

Bill Clinton was bad enough for Black people: Think about all the harmful anti-Black legislation he actively supported, like the Crime Bill of 1994 (mass incarceration), TANF (gutted welfare), how he signed legislation that blocked Pell Grants from going to prisoners seeking education, to how he blocked parents with drug arrest records from receiving food and housing assistance.

And now remember Hillary’s racist super predators speech (who needed to be “brought to heel” like animals), and how it took her 20 years to give a tepid non-apology, and how she literally had to be BEGGED to stop taking money from the private prison industry. The Clintons are foul.

YES, we still need to get rid of Donald Trump. No one is losing sight of that. But we can chew gum and walk at the same time. To beat Trump by wide margins we need actual progressives in 2018 and 2020. Not Third Way “moderates”. Not centrists. We need—we demand—progressives. By now it should be painfully clear that we can do better than Bill or Hillary Clinton. They are a political gift to Republicans and a liability to progressives. Any political influence that the Clintons hold over the Democratic Party needs to be completely rejected and eliminated. And that includes revamping or eliminating the rigged Super Delegate system.