sunny way

Even I Do Mistakes (sherlock x reader) part three

HERE IT IS!! And like always, mentions of drugs, drug use you know.

This had to be some kind of a record of some sort. The whole week had been terrible for you, work had kicked ass, your friends all busy and boring and of course life in general. The weather sucked and you couldn’t sleep. You needed something to help your mind get off of these thoughts and you knew exactly what it was you were in need of.

You walked past a cafe, a deserted street with shady alleyways at every corner of a building. The sky was clear, sun shining and as you just said, the weather sucked. The day you wished for rain and clouds it became sunny and the other way around. This for example was the ideal of not a perfect day to go buy drugs.

This was the fourth place you entered now, starting to get pissed at how your errand had lengthened from what you had originally planned.

You walked fast, your steps long and your cheeks had become tinted with red while you ran around London trying to get what you need. This time it looked like no one unwanted was near and by that you meant the homeless people. Damn Sherlock and his homeless network. Every time you had approached a drug dealer a beggar had blocked your path and wouldn’t let you take a step further leaving you with only one option. Leave.

You knew Sherlock would make this hard, but it started to seem impossible for you to pull this through when his minions were all awake and in the right places.

But instead of losing hope and giving up you only got more boost from Sherlock’s attempts of stopping you. Growing even more competitive you walked with confidence to your destination, head high and a smug smirk growing on your face. You were so close and there was no one there, no homeless people blocking  your path and jumping on your face to ’beg for money’.

You were walking down a street, about five feet away from an alley way where you knew there would be at least one to sell you what you wanted and needed. You saw a man in a long coat that barely showed his feet, the collar high shielding the man’s neck, back towards you. He had to have something. You were now on the alley, a couple steps away when the man started talking. To you.

”Pretty persistent of you to come this far with as much trouble as I put you through.” Oh shit. Sherlock turned to face you with a shit eating grin like he had just beat you in a game, which he had.

”Not so bad yourself.” You had to give him credit for what he had done. Even if you were slightly surprised for the effort he put in stopping you from getting what you were after. With this much evidence he could easily sic Mycroft after you to make sure the whole England was cleared from dealers to sell you anything.

”Well, I can’t take all the credit, though it will cost me for using my network at as beautiful days as this.” Sherlock eyed the sky as if he really cared.

”Yeah well if it makes you feel any better the weather wasn’t on my side today either.” You had started to walk with Sherlock away from the alleyway, heading towards the main road.

”I have to say you couldn’t have been more obvious with your moves.” Sherlock commented. He didn’t lower the collar of his coat even if the sun was shining right on you two.

”What you mean?” You coldly usher.

”You went in straight line from one place to the other. Knowing that I was after you you could’ve put more effort on this. You made this way too easy for me that I actually became boring.” Sherlock wails.

”Why didn’t you just stop then?” You needed to ask. You knew the answer but really didn’t need him to care this much. Sherlock stopped on his tracks and when you took the hint you stopped yourself, making eye contact with the now slightly scolding detective.

”Why?” Sherlock glared at you. ”You know why.”

”I know what for but why. I don’t know why you care this much. I understand your and John’s concern but you know well enough with what we’re dealing with.” You sounded stubborn and maybe childish, but in your head this all made sense. You needed drugs and you could handle what was going on.

”And that is why I care!” Sherlock snapped, his voice booming and making you jump. ”I know what you’re dealing with and believe me, if you continue this long enough you will go in too deep and even I might not be able to help you.” You couldn’t say anything back to him. You were silenced by his raged actions and behavior which left you speechless. ”And I will not let that happen.” Then you couldn’t stay quiet anymore and overstepped him with your choice of words.

”But this is exactly what you’re doing.”

Sherlock gave you a terrifying look. His eyes were wide, a wild and scary, even murderous stare and his lips in line he looked down on you. ”Is that what this is about?” He asked trying to study you but he was so upset he couldn’t concentrate.

”No. Like said to John this is not me copying you. This is me being me. Why can’t people see that! I’m not trying to fish for attention, I’m trying to get help for my problems. To the stress.”

”Well that is not what you get from using drugs!”

”Actually it is!”

”Yes, it kinda is isn’t it?” Sherlock admitted or more of thought out loud. ”But you have to stop.”

”It’s not your decision!” You argued.

”Now it is.” Sherlock announced and started walking again. You were almost at the main road.

”Sherlock please, just forget about this. Forget about me and my problems and concentrate on your own-”

”I don’t have problems.” Sherlock stated thoughtfully.

”Uhm, yes you do, but anyways, this is my problem, let me deal with it.” You tired begging but Sherlock’s stoic face gave it away it was far from over.

”You are making everyone worry (Y/n).” You two had stopped once again, and Sherlock stood close to you, his hands found their way on the sides of your face, his thumbs caressing your cheeks. ”John, Mrs. Hudson and most importantly, me.”

Your face softened. Sherlock’s soothing voice and caressing fingers melted you, and his worry for you was some what very comforting. ”It doesn’t end my problems, Sherlock.” You told him sadly.

”I’m not going anywhere, (Y/n). I will be right here if you need anything.” He was getting alarmingly close to your face. Knowing Sherlock you turned your face just in time to block his attempts to kiss you.

”Don’t.” was all you said. You put your hands on his wrists prying his hands off of your face.

The two of you stood in silence. You faced away from him and he trying to find a clue of your actions from you. Anything at all. A move, a look, twitching muscle. But he was unable to find anything. But there was something in there. The sadness in your voice.

”Tell John your plan was a success.” You almost whispered, taking a step back, Sherlock’s hands falling to his sides. ”I didn’t get anything and that I left home.”

”I can’t say that.” Sherlock admitted.

”Why?” You angrily hissed. You started to get fed up by his games.

”Because what would he think of me telling him you went home when you’re standing right beside me?” Sherlock waited fro you to reply and he didn’t need to wait long.

”Sherlock, I’m really not in the mood of going out to solve crime today.” You sighed, your eyes closed.

”Good, because that is not what we’re going to be doing.” He was almost smiling now. No idea why but you could see a smile growing on his lips.

”Won’t you be bored?” You imitated Sherlock’s deep voice while saying the word ’bored’.

”Maybe, but I do need to make sure you won’t.” He smiled. Now he was fully smiling.

”Well, I guess I can’t stop you.” You admitted in defeat, letting a smile curve on your lips too. He’s smile was contagious.

”But if you do want to go visit a crime scene or annoy Lestrade-”

”I’ll let you know.” You chuckled, taking his hand. You knew Sherlock had beat you today, but it wasn’t as bad as you had thought first. It was quit nice. And when you finally showed up to Baker Street John was asking you all kinds of questions every second Sherlock left the room. He was over the moon for he was so sure you’d be a couple soon enough.

Monday 8:27am
I woke up with you on my mind.
You called me babe last night —
my heart is still pounding.

Tuesday 10:53pm
Today I realized we won’t work.
What we are is hurting her.
And I think she matters more to me than you do.

Wednesday 11:52pm
I broke things off with you today.
She barely said a word.
I’ve never regretted anything more than this.

Thursday 4:03pm
I shouldn’t have sent that message.
You shouldn’t have been so okay with receiving it.

Friday 9:57pm
I almost messaged you today.
I didn’t.

Saturday 8:49pm
I’m walking around town in search of alcohol.
They say that liquor numbs the pain of having a broken heart.
I want to put that to the test.

Sunday 2:32am
I heard you texted a girl you’ve never spoken to before.
I wonder if it’s because you’re trying to replace me.
I can’t help but wish you weren’t.
I thought I was irreplaceable.

—  a week with you on my mind, c.j.n.
Move on, leave, run away, escape this place… but don’t forget about me, about us, about this town. Always remember where you come from so you can appreciate how far you’ve come.
—  c.j.n.