sundayinspiration

Inspiration for your early 20's.

If there’s a lesson to learn it would be to just “DO”. Cause in five years you’ll wish you had, so don’t be lazy. Don’t waste five years drinking your early 20’s away, and remember to get things done. Celebrate when there’s accomplishments to celebrate. Don’t dwell on the jerks who break your heart, cause in your early 20s that’s what datings all about! So have fun with it and when you’re 25 you'll know what you deserve. And when your parents are still letting you live at home, be kind. Cause in five years you’ll realize they were right about the things they taught you. And when it comes to your money, save it. Buy when you need, and not to flaunt. Cause it’s a lot cooler to have saved for future experiences than to flaunt designer and feel stuck in a rut.
Think about it…
In five years one could earn 2 degrees, buy a house, fall in love, or move on from a bad relationship. In five years one could go to diff country! Gawd so much. Five years go by fast.

On Sat I’ll be turning 25 its insane! These are some things I wish I could say to 20 year old me. So now I want to make sure 30 year old me has stacked up all KINDS of accomplishments that would impress the hell out of 25 year old me.

Think of YOURSELF in five years. Then work on the things that will impress the hell out of future YOU.

Starting Over

This happens every now and then. You get yourself into a situation that’s completely changed you in a somewhat negative light. Maybe its heartbreak and you feel like you’ll never be the same. Or maybe you started questioning yourself cause you haven’t been doing the right thing with certain people or certain decisions. Of course, when you talk to people about whatever it is you’re going through, they say, “time will heal you”. But you feel so changed it’s hard to listen. The thing is these low, life-changing moments are blessings in disguise and opportunities for a new beginning. So give yourself a fresh start. You deserve it.

1.)   Cry if You Want to- Seriously, just get it all out of your system. If you don’t take the time to grieve it out on your own time, and bottle up your feelings, you might end up doing something wreckless if not, prolonging your inadequacy. It’s a form of meditation that gets rid of emotionally negative toxins. So grieve…and cry.

2.)   The Power of Delete- Anything that makes you feel uncomfortable has to go. Any photos or objects that stunt you from starting over, delete them and toss ‘em out. And if it’s TOO tough to even go on Facebook or Instagram, just delete it/them. Although if that’s not an option just don’t use them for a while, because it’s okay to take time away from social media to improve your well-being. Any contacts you can’t bear keeping, delete. If you think changing your number is an option do it. All in the efforts of a fresh start! Likewise, cut out things from your diet. For example if you’re in a depressed state of mind, getting hammered off tequila isn’t going to help. Often hangovers empower you to get stuck in the sadness. No matter how much your friends pressure you to drink, do what’s best for you. And if you can’t get rid of stress or anxiety try not drinking coffee for a while and opt for green tea or a veggie juice instead. Cutting back on the caffeine will help you sleep better therefore reducing the stress and/or anxiety.

3.)   People- Often there’s pressure to be around a certain crowd for the sake of being well-liked. That’s pretty much bull. If you’re serious about starting over, you have to distance yourself from anybody who makes you feel negative. No more bad vibes, and instead surround yourself with people who empower you to be better. You are who you surround yourself with. So stick around friends and family who inspire you and don’t suck you back into a place you’d like to be far removed from.

4.)   Be brand new!- If you have the means to, change your surroundings. Paint your bedroom a new color, or change up the comforter and pillow sheets. Clean out your closet and donate old clothing then treat yourself to a new outfit or shoes. Get a haircut, or change the color of your hair. Hell, if you have the time, obtain a new internship or look for a better job. And most importantly, be open to meeting new people. Making positive new friends is amazing because with new friends, come new experiences. The point is to change things up for therapeutic reasons that encourage your new beginning.

5.)   Inspiration- Many will give you advice. Sometimes you’ll listen and other times you’ll want to tell the advice giver that it’s easier said than done. The great thing is you can filter out the things you read and hear, and pay attention to what strongly effects you positively. There’s so many quote memes on the internet, so you can print the ones that resonate most with you and put them up on your walls for daily inspiration. Read any books, blogs, and articles that spark new ideas for positive change and kick your ass into waking up every morning, ready to be a brand new you. If you enjoy writing, get a brand NEW journal and let your first entry be a reflection of where you’d like to see yourself in the future. In the journal you can include lists and plans for the changes you need to make in life. 

There’s advice to be given about starting over like time healing things, and higher powers wanting the best for you, but the truth is it’s all about DOING new things and making the changes. You’re in control! There’s just so much you can do to kick off the brand new chapter of your life, but as long as you listen to yourself everything will be okay. Do what’s right for you. Best of luck.

-LonaMisa

Were are all individually great! If you cant see that?… Take a look at yourself without comparisions. We all go through completely different life experiences, and because of that we grow at our own pace. Therefor our progress should never be compared to someone elses. Be proud of where you stand, despite where someone else is standing. Be the best YOU, you can be 😉 #SundayInspiration #TheTruth #AcceptYourself #AlbertEinstein

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As you become more clear about who you really are, you’ll be better able to decide what’s best for you - Oprah Winfrey


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How To Get Along With People

Everybody at one point or another has wondered why most people they know get along with a certain person. Maybe you thought, “Why does everybody like him/her?” and you even wished you had friends like so and so does. But you’ve definitely thought these things about someone whether it being when you were younger or at the age you are now. Usually those thoughts are followed up with self-doubts about your own likeability and you think to yourself, “Is there something wrong with me?”. Those self-doubts though are crazy, cause as Elle Woods says, “You have all the equipment. You just have to read the manual”.  You can get along with anyone as long as you’re willing to acknowledge and change what you have to do differently when socializing or having conversations.

  1. Controlling the conversation- Many have the habit of trying to lead the conversation and this is done by rarely letting others talk. Or finally when able to get a word out, they’re interrupted by another idea the conversation partner thinks is right. Avoid from doing most of the talking, and listen.
  2. You’re not always right - It’s important to be aware that you don’t know everything. Cause when a person talks as if they know everything or as if they’re always right without being a listener, they actually give the impression that they’re not very wise. Make sense? Better to realize there’s always SO much to learn and try to step outside the comforts of what you think you already know.
  3. Being agreeable – It’s a way of showing people you “get them”, and we LOVE when people understand us. So be agreeable when you can especially on subjects that aren’t involving core beliefs.
  4. Be interested- We’re all VERY interested in ourselves. We think about ourselves probably most of the time we’re not sleeping. So when having conversations, let people talk about the thing they’re most interested in which is themselves. That’s where you will ALWAYS find common ground. Ask about their lives, and how experiences made them feel.
  5. Be relatable- The best way to relate to people is showing them you’re human too by showing them you understand their vulnerabilities because you also have your own. People can’t sympathize or relate to anyone who tries to be perfect. And believe me it’s noticeable when a person pretends as if they don’t have problems. We ALL have problems, and have feelings and vulnerabilities so be true about who you are. People enjoy being around those they can relate to, and usually steer clear from control freaks.
  6. Talking in circles- It’s noticeable when a person is speaking without having gathered their thoughts, because they tend to talk in circles and have trouble getting to the point. You can especially wow people by saying exactly what you mean, and proving your point in the least amount of words possible. Don’t talk for the sake of getting words out because you’ll likely give the impression you’re talking out of your ass. Instead take a moment to think about what you need to say. Not only does it help you, but shows your conversation partner your listening and giving thought to the things they’re saying.

 

When I was in the first grade, our family moved into a small town 20 min east of Pasadena. Being young I had no idea what it meant to be the new girl, so naturally I squealed in excitement on the drive over to my new school. Once there and on the playground I approached different kids and asked if I could play but of course about 4 turned me away. One girl even chanted, “Eww I don’t know you!”. I remember trying hard to hold back tears but I couldn’t, so I sat under a tree and cried. About five minutes later after wiping my tears away I noticed a puddle of mud and for me at the time meant, mud pies. I had so much fun making mud pies that I didn’t notice a girl standing over me until she poked me on my shoulder and asked, “Can I play with you?”.

            I share this memory of mine with you because the significance of it is really important to me and can be useful for you as well. You know that if all else fails, just remember to be comfortable with you. If you genuinely like yourself and enjoy your own company, others will enjoy your company too. Have fun and be honest with yourself. Learn to relax, and trust your instincts. And so tip number 7 is, the most important thing you can do to get along with others, is the get along with YOU.

(Recommended reading: “How to talk to Anyone” by Leil Lowndess, and “Skill with People” by Les Giblin)

How to be Independent

When I was younger, I filled up any emptiness I felt with serial monogamy, or constant outings with others. As I got older I realized people come and go, so anytime a person left, the fear of being alone prevailed. I guess what it was is just a bad case of serial rebounding. Anyhow, it only made for creating dependability on others to fill any gaps in my life. It only took one PROFOUND experience to realize it was time to be alone for a while.

Whatever the experience or realization may be, the transition into being alone again gets tough but you can change the way you’ve been doing things. You can create for yourself the complete opposite of dependability on others to make you happy. Become independent.

Independent: adjective

not depending on another for livelihood or subsistence

capable of thinking or acting for oneself.

not connected with another or with each other; separate.

not depending on something else for strength or effectiveness; freestanding.

1. Take notes from Bridget Jones- Like the character Bridget, you too need a journal/diary. Documenting your ups and downs is important because you can figure out time frames of when you feel them. Learning and understanding your emotions helps if you’re working on your independence. For example if you see a pattern of wanting to depend on others mostly on the weekends, you’ll start to realize you only feel those emotions cause it’s the weekend. Becoming aware of this, you’ll learn to ride the weekends out in stride by preparing ways to cheer yourself up. Strengthening your self-love. Also in your journal/diary document your goals and how you’ll make them happen. As MUCH as you can, strengthen your self-encouragement.

2. The 90 day challenge- I’ve read somewhere that it takes 21 days to form a habit and anything harder than getting yourself to drink a glass of water before breakfast may take longer. So every day for 90 days, do something all by yourself and for yourself. A good friend of mine actually did this challenge and gained a lot from it. Once a shy woman, the challenge forced her to step out of her comfort zone and try things she wouldn’t normally do alone. She can eat at a restaurant by herself and go to the beach by herself. She even takes yoga classes and encouraged herself to design clothing. It’s because of this lovely person I was introduced to this challenge. So everyday, at least 30 min. a day for 90 days, do something all by yourself, for yourself. 

3. Money- There’s a huge misconception that earning money, and spending it on the things you want is a way of being independent, but there’s a flaw in this type of thinking. For example, spending hard earned money on a $200 dollar purse or shoes doesn’t completely make a person #independent. I mean for all we know you could still be living with your folks. So like the definition above, it’s really about not depending on anyone for your livelihood. Money is an important stepping-stone toward achieving independence. Learn how to manage your money as soon as possible. I only wish in high school they’d teach financial responsibility. But anyhow, spend on the necessities to take care of yourself BEFORE you buy the purse or shoes. Cause true independence is about earning your own money to take care of yourself, rather than flaunt designer and feel stuck in a rut.

4. Be True- It’s probably the easiest thing ever to be influenced by others. I remember being at a high school party once and group of kids across from me had been pestering a guy to takes shots of tequila. When he said no, he was further peer pressured. Still he stuck to his decision and I remember thinking he was cool. It’s these types of little things that separate an independent person with a not so independent person because an independent person makes decisions that are honest for them-selves. Don’t lie to yourself. It’s okay to take advice from others but you should ultimately make decisions that are best for you. Just be true to you. “To find yourself, think for yourself”- Socrates

Some days will be tougher than others, but you got this. Even independent women like Beyonce face their challenges. Just remember the universal lesson to kick-start your independence, which is to fall in love with yourself. And love yourself well. Sending good vibesss.

-LonaMisa

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