sun-was-high-so-was-i

4

It’s early morning, the sun is slowly making it’s way into it’s place high in the sky. I love the morning here, so quiet almost as peaceful as back home. Even with the sound of the ocean waves and the wind all through the trees it feels still, trapping me in the illusion of never passing time. 

It’s the best time to go to my favorite spot and read. 

I round the corner with my head down, stopping as soon as I see my sister Alley sitting there. Her eyes are red the corners of her mouth are pulled all the way down and I hate it when she’s not smiling, even though it’s something she seems to do less and less these days. 

“What’s going on Alley.” I ask taking a seat beside her. 

She sniffles before raising her eyes to meet mine, “I’m in big trouble Lulu.” She sounds so sad and broken, nothing like the girl I’ve known my whole life. “I’m pregnant.” 

Monday 8:27am
I woke up with you on my mind.
You called me babe last night —
my heart is still pounding.

Tuesday 10:53pm
Today I realized we won’t work.
What we are is hurting her.
And I think she matters more to me than you do.

Wednesday 11:52pm
I broke things off with you today.
She barely said a word.
I’ve never regretted anything more than this.

Thursday 4:03pm
I shouldn’t have sent that message.
You shouldn’t have been so okay with receiving it.

Friday 9:57pm
I almost messaged you today.
I didn’t.

Saturday 8:49pm
I’m walking around town in search of alcohol.
They say that liquor numbs the pain of having a broken heart.
I want to put that to the test.

Sunday 2:32am
I heard you texted a girl you’ve never spoken to before.
I wonder if it’s because you’re trying to replace me.
I can’t help but wish you weren’t.
I thought I was irreplaceable.

—  a week with you on my mind, c.j.n.
Move on, leave, run away, escape this place… but don’t forget about me, about us, about this town. Always remember where you come from so you can appreciate how far you’ve come.
—  c.j.n.